Paula Poundstone
Appearances
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
When my kids were little, my oldest daughter had some health problems that she wasn't supposed to have certain food, like little dietary restrictions. So she comes home one day, she was always coming home with like... foods that I hadn't sent her off with all over her shirt.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
And so one day, somehow this came up that she had gotten some sort of food that she wasn't supposed to have, and it was that. Pirate's booty. Which I had never heard of at the time. And I said, well, you know, I asked her about it. She said, I was eating pirate's booty. And I said, no, there's no such thing like that. And she goes, yeah, there is. I said, there is. I get so angry.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
I go, booty is like a phrase, honey, for like a woman's butt. They would not name a snack food pirate's booty. They just wouldn't. And then, of course, we're in the grocery store and the kids show me. And I'm like, OK. So that's like a regular thing. criticism that I receive from my adult children is to reminisce about the Pirate's Booty story. So I'm looking forward to playing the game again.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
You know, A, they're heroes, and they handled it so amazingly well. You never heard anything but that they were excited to be there. Yes. But I think as Americans, we are prepared, or certainly, well, I mean, people my age and up are prepared for that, for a trip to take a turn where you stay longer than you planned because of Gilligan's Island. We know that the... Yeah, that's true.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
It rhymes with baking and taking, and it's like vibrating. Shaking? Shaking! Yes! Yes!
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
It was supposed to be a three-hour tour. A three-hour tour.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
Absolutely. And I'm sure it's part of astronaut training.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
Wow. Yeah, but that can be a red herring. Yeah, absolutely.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
Well, you know what's interesting about this proposition you're making, is that basically you're saying, be prepared to say anything. Which would be the same as not being prepared. Wow.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
I would spend any amount of money to bust these liars. Really? They're not going to get away with it. I'm tired of being lied to.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
Just before the start of their recent soccer game, Bulgarian team Arda paid tribute to recently deceased former team member Petko Gonchev. Both teams lined up and bowed their heads for a moment of silence. Meanwhile, the 78-year-old Gontchev was running late to get home to watch the game on TV, as was his practice. He wasn't dead.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
When he pulled up at his house, his wife came out crying and shouting, Petko, Petko, they announced on TV that you were dead. Gontchev was so shaken by not being dead... He downed a glass of brandy. So many people called me relatives, friends, acquaintances, and not so big acquaintances, Gonchev said. Like maybe Stoyan, Ivan's friend from the bar that he met that time. Petko? Yes? It's me, Stoyan.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Moe Wagner
Do I know you? Yes, we met at the bar that time. I'm Ivan's friend. Were you wearing a striped shirt? No, I had a blue shirt. Oh yes, Stoyan, hello. Petko, are you dead?
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Jiwoo of Jiwoo's Quick Buy Convenience Market in East Orange, New Jersey, loves Bruce Springsteen. Signage among the shelves of groceries and household items have long borne tributes to the boss. A dusty, hey baby, I'm about starving tonight sign hangs over the host's snack cake display. An oh, oh, oh, I'm on fire sign dangles over the door flame logs.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
And there beneath the oh, baby, this town rips the bones from your back sign are the first aid supplies. The shop's nachos are sold as chips with boss sauce, and Jiwoo proudly displays a picture of the boss himself enjoying a plateful.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
However, when Lee Woo posted a sign saying that Springsteen would be performing there on December 7th, which he did not, it not only disappointed fans, but also resulted in a cease and desist for from the Springsteen legal team. We knew the nacho pitcher was photoshopped, and that was fine, but this was just a bridge too far, says Springsteen lawyer Carolyn Bump.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Jiwoo framed the cease and desist later, and fans enjoy visiting the store to see it.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
It's kind of a tradition within the court. A very high bar. Speaking of traditions within the court, I heard that it's a tradition that the junior justice also has to take care of the meals in the cafeteria for the other justices? Yes.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
I don't know. I so hate apps. that as much as I admire and love you, I cannot support that idea.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Mo, you were fantastic in The Martian, Mo. You were great. Fantastic.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Wait, so I'm going to be sincere really quickly. That photograph of your daughter looking at you during your confirmation hearing was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen in my life. Oh my goodness. Thank you. It was remarkable. It was, you know, I showed it to my kids and I said, what the hell's the matter with you?
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
My daughter's bus driver came to me one time because he was giving her a pink slip for bad behavior for something on the bus. But the reason he was upset is because he went to take a nap on the bus one day. You know, when the kids were not, obviously. He went to take a nap. And he laid down in what was my daughter's seat. And he smelled this horrible smell.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
And she had been taking the fruit that I, you know, put in the Tupperware in her lunchbox and shoving it under the seat. And so there's a horrible rotten fruit smell. And, of course, I was upset because I said I was going to eat that.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Paula Poundstone. Just whatever's in the trunk of your car.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
when authorities discovered... Well, let me try to steer you in the right direction. You know these days that if you... Because she had a note on her that said, don't forget you have that gun in your bag. That is so close.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Plenty of room in those shoes, that's for sure.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
She should have done what I do, like if I'm taking meds or something, I will tape, like if you have to take them multiple times, right? I tape them to my shirt. And then when I go out, people go, what's that on your shirt? And I go, oh, geez, thanks. And I take it.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Yeah, the individual pills, not big bottles.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
Well, if they notice too early, I won't take it.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson
God, see, I was really bad at quizzes, and I always did C when I didn't know the answer.