Khloé Kardashian
Appearances
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It doesn't. I love it. Me too. Some cats need it.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Yes, but. It's it's more vanity things like that we would cut like. And mainly like sometimes like my mom or something like that. But I've never, I mean, trust me, I would have cut way other shit. I've never cut anything crazy. Who's the pickiest? Courtney, but it's not, it's more because she'll say, I say like too many times, so remove this word. It's more that regard.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It's not really because of story – not storylines because they're following us, but it's not about a story concept. It's more verbiage. Yes. I get it. Yeah. You want to present well. I get it. And she still says like – 500 times. We love you, Courtney.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Liar. Everyone thinks that. I don't know why. He has his own home. He's an adult. How do you think Rob has managed to stay so private? He's a good old recluse like me. I respect it. But we live in the same community. He comes over all the time. I'm with Dream all the time. Um... But yeah, I don't know why everyone thinks he lives with me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I love that you asked that because I think as a man too, not that it's a bad thing if he did live with me because he did live with me at one point and I loved it, but I begged him to. And I actually wish he did live with me now. But I just think also he wants people to know like I got my own shit going on.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
About where I go. I think that's good though, right? No, I think it's good. But it was unhealthy how reclusive I was. And it was like only kid things. And I wasn't going to do anything adult. And like nobody talked to me because I hate humans. And now I'm like, okay, I could socialize a little bit. I have my social batteries getting turned up a smidge.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Wow, that's crazy. I don't even remember that. But if I said that, then maybe. Wow. I'm obsessed. A lot happens every year. I'm like, wow, I went on Andy Cohen and said that. Then probably if I said that. Wait, you don't know. But not like a sex tape. It's not like I was like entertaining. Like it was never if this is I think it's all coming back to me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Like I'm sure it was something we just did for ourselves. Not like to sell to somebody. Oh, my God. Maybe. I know. Kind of fun. Yeah. Good for me. Oh, my God. Okay. Lie or not. You're like, I have a sex scene. I was like, I do not. And then in two seconds, I changed my answer.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It could be all of the above. It depends the level of drama. And it's like, you know, is this a code for? And probably like a code for is like we need an in-person meeting, family meeting, stat. Get Christy on the phone. Our publicist is like we need everyone all hands on deck. Or if it's a mild thing, then it could be a text war back and forth. But normally – no, not normally.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It just depends what it is. But we've had a few in-person meetings before.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Or do you think it's still as insane? I think it just depends on the month. But I will say for me, but it's also because I've been a recluse recently. But for me, I feel like things have calmed down. But I'm also not dating and all those things. So I don't have a lot of
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
No. And this happened, it was couples therapy with my ex-husband. And I knew, I know for a fact it was this person, but when it happened, it was, and this was like the height of tabloids. And when it was on the cover, I was like, I just knew instantly, but I was going through so much personally and emotionally.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I just said, I'm done with this and I'm going to, and people always ask, why didn't I press charges? That's also just not my thing. I know who you are and what you did, and I don't know what that's going to do for me. But what was done was done. That happened. And I also saw a doctor when I was with Lamar when I was trying to get pregnant. I was doing IVF.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And that doctor or a nurse, I can't say which one because I don't know, they released my IVF records to the press and that's a violation of HIPAA law as well. But I just, those two things really, the therapy thing really messed with me. And I took a break from therapy for a long time. I now have a new therapist. But it took, I mean, at least like 10 years it took me. to trust someone again.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
sometimes it's the second I get in the car that I'm like, what did I like? Oh, my outfit. It's just how I feel. It's too much work. And then you just have to schmooze people. And you're like, I don't really, these aren't enjoyable conversations. They're like, it's just small talk. And nobody cares what I'm doing right now with my life. Shut up. So it's those moments that
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
work really well together in life. We really do. And Kim introduced me to her. Kim was like, I'm seeing her. I think she'd be really beneficial to you. And she is. And she's just, and I think it's sort of good because she gets our dynamic even from a deeper level by knowing Kim.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I think so. Yeah. And she gets to hear Kim's version of the story or Kim's version of not that it's a lie or anything, but like Kim's version of our childhood and my version. And, you know, because we all have different experiences and how we narrate things. And I think that's important.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
If she does, she's really good at not acting like that.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Okay. I think it just depends. I didn't for years. Lately I'll – not that I'm really reading. I like to engage with fans. So it's more like I like to – she's like, hi, I love you. Like nice things because I'm just appreciative. But when it gets – I could tell if I'm in like a dark place and I'm like I'm not strong enough to read things. So it just really depends on me. But I wouldn't say no. Okay.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Right now, I feel like I'm really good. Like I'm in a good place. I don't think – I'm like, oh, shut up. Like I could just brush it off and be like – I don't know. Someone said something to me the other day. I'm like, daddy, chill. Like leave me the fuck alone. But things just don't get under my skin. But before –
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It would probably be more, I think, when I was fresh off of the Tristan cheating on me stuff, if it was any comment about me being weak or like I can't keep a man or things like that that maybe I was already insecure about. I was like, okay, that's a trigger, but more so because I'm insecure about it. If they said it to me on another day, it probably wouldn't bother me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It just depends where you're at mentally. Totally. There's some days I'm like I can't – like there was a time that I was like I can't even go outside because I was so embarrassed to even look at people. And that – I'm like but why did I carry that with me like now that I'm out of that? And I don't know. And it was obviously something –
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
that I had to process and go through and work on myself about, but I'm not going to deny that I wasn't at that low of a point where there were times I would not leave my house because I just didn't even want to look at someone in the eyes. Like that's how dark it got for me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It's silly to me, but when people say we're not talented, and I think in the traditional sense, like, no, we're not singing and dancing. Yes. But nowadays, there's so much more to people. And I think we have so much power in marketing and branding. And we've been in this business for 20 years. And to be able to do that and to do that with six, seven, if you include my mom, different
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
unique individuals and sustain and evolve and keep that going, you would call, if we were men, you'd be like, they're marketing geniuses. But because we're women, people want to sort of poke and make fun. And we're along for the ride. We will make fun. We're along with the jokes. We'll go with it because we have a good sense of humor and we get it. But traditionally, yes, we're not sitting here
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
singing on a stage, performing. And I respect that. But we also deserve a little respect in terms for how long that we've been sustaining in this industry and evolving and not just coasting. And to do it with so many different people.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Oh, we think that all the time. But we also get it. Like we're the first ones to, we take it on the chin. And I also think that's what we all should do. I think, yes, it's okay to still prove your place in the world, but also understand if people aren't,
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
forward thinkers with you because I get it at the time people couldn't understand well how are they how are they acquiring such want and desire and attention but what do they do like I get that and but we've proven ourselves and especially when people like you said we're praying and trying for our downfall and we were like No, we're good.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
They're so unique and different in their own ways. But if I had Kendall's body, I would say Kendall.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I was like, it's her texting. Hold on. The queen. I'm not in glam phone call. Okay, boss.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Well, I would be – I would – Because I would, it depends who, but I would say Kendall, Kylie, Kim on conference.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So I'm not like, that petty of a person. I wish I was like, but I will say I'm going to fuck your dad, but it doesn't happen. But that would be like my dream if I was like that petty, but no, that's never happened.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Because in my soul, I want to. But then I'm like, I will braid your hair later. Like, I'm such a pussy. But I pretend. I am. Like, in my soul, I'm like, and if when I'm mad at you, I will fucking go off and I'm a machine gun with my words and insults. And then I'm like, all right, whatever. I'm over it. I got all the energy out.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Oh, my God. She has to be in glam. I respect her.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I would say me. Not anymore, though. No. Cancel, cancel. Not anymore. I do not claim that energy anymore.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Oh, I've gone far. I've gone far. I mean, yeah. I've either... Kim has this way of knowing how to hack into people's voicemails when voicemails were a thing. So we've done that in the past. Oh, my God. I was picturing you guys like sitting around the kitchen, getting in there, screaming when you hear it.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Screaming, throwing the phone down or like because you're like, oh, my God, like we didn't think we would actually get in and we get in.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Probably every time. I mean, I've also... I've also to my... Yes, I've had trackers on people's cars before. Yeah. Oh, she's gone. Listen, gone girl over here.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Well, that's what I hate. Do not act like you did not put me in this position and you did not make me be this psychopath. But I think that's something I...
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Oh, by myself? Mm-hmm. Never leaving the bed. By myself in my bed watching TV. What are you watching? I mean, I love a documentary. I just watched shit. Is it apple cider vinegar? Oh, my God. Did I make that up? No, but that sounds. It's the story about the this health influencer from Australia that fake typing cancer. Oh, OK. Fascinating. And it's it's like a two episode.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It's an addiction. Once you start, you can't stop. I've been there. I have been there. I remember my ex-husband, and he remembers this story, I'm sure. We were married. He... was doing his thing and he went down to some motel in downtown LA and was with a girl and I was young. Not that, I mean, I'm like maybe 26, something like that.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
This is a big moment. I am a trendsetter in the family.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Probably still old enough to not behave like this, but I was there and I remember asking the guy at the front, I was like, hey, is... Lamar Odom. Where's Lamar Odom? He's this big guy. You can identify him. He told me what room he was in. I saw in the window that him and this girl were They were either naked or she was in lingerie, something like that. I knocked on the door.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
They answered it for some reason. And I just started going ballistic. And I remember the next day, it was, I think, Penelope's birthday party. And it was a cowboy party. And my knuckles were all bloody and gross. And I just had bandanas wrapped around. I was on theme. And I acted as if nothing ever happened. And I don't think I ever said a thing. He could not understand how I knew where he was.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I was like, I don't give a shit. I'm not telling anybody anything. And why are you in a motel in downtown LA at three in the morning?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Why are you here? But also everyone told like, it's like, you're this seven foot tall man. You're in, you're on the Lakers. Everyone knows who you are. You're very identifiable. So I think how I found out was people on Twitter were like, Lamar Odom is did it. And so I, Of course. And that's psychotic. I searched his hashtag for his name. Of course. Like any real girl does.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It's an obsession and an addiction. And the best thing is when you're free of that. And I pray I never am back there again.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So I have heard before when I was in my 30s, like, oh, turning 40s is so great. Everyone's like, it's freeing. It's this. So I always had a really good perception of what 40 was going to be like. And my 30s were just really tough for me, like a lot of traumatic experiences.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I had great experiences like by having my kids, but either business or so many things weren't going the way that I really wanted them to or how I envisioned. And I think that for me, at least, I envisioned being married and having kids. And I just had this different fantasy, I guess, or just what I thought when I was 20, what was going to happen in my life. And those things didn't happen.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And then I was like, you know what? Instead of making this such a sob story, I'm going to be like, I can't. Let me change the narrative. Get all the shit out in my 30s. And I'm going to leave them in my 30s. And they're just going to be stepping stones and things that make me stronger and better for my 40s. And... intentionally in the last two years of my 30s, I called it shedding this negativity.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I actually saw this – he's like a spiritual healer. He was like, your new decade is going to be this fresh start for you. He just sort of confirmed everything that I felt. I started a couple of new businesses in my 30s, but they didn't come true until my 40s. I just felt like now so many great things are happening for me. Not that they weren't my 30s, but The traction was slower.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
She ends up not having it. She's still on the run. And like whatever. But it's fascinating. So I like things like that. Like sort of gossipy. But it's a docu. I need that. I love that.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I'm not going to hold on to any of the negativity that I had in my 30s. So I'm like, okay, that was all the bullshit. I'm leaving it there. And I'm only receiving and accepting beautiful, positive things for my 40s.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Well, I think at first you have to go through those feelings and it's okay to feel it. Like I definitely felt like a failure or my time passed. And I think it's natural to compare, at least for me. I have all these successful siblings and I see all what they're doing and I'm like, okay, but I'm sort of stagnant at this place. And for me, I love to pray.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I listen to, I have a Bible app that I do every morning. I need that time for myself, but it sets the tone for my day. And if I don't do that, or if I don't at least have your positive affirmations or whatever that is that really encourages yourself, if it's the gym, like little things, you have to take that you time. But I took time intentionally this year
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
to self-reflect and be like, what am I doing? Because it's not everybody else. So what am I doing that's not sticking? Or let me change how I'm handling something else. But when it comes to marriage or kids, that I feel bad that we put that pressure on ourselves. And it's hard not to because essentially we do have this biological clock that's ticking when it comes to babies.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But also what is really cool is I did do IVF in my 20s. And when you froze embryos then, you had to sign something that when you're, I believe it said like when you're 40 or 42, if you don't use these embryos yet, you have to either donate the, you have your choices, either donate them to science or donate them to people for adoption or terminate them.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
You know, maybe by my bedside drawer is the more like it's such like a mishmash of things. Like I have.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And you signed which ones that you agreed to. And then I made embryos, I want to say when I was like 35. And that time span now, it's at like 50 something. And so it moved about 10 years because our life expectancy is longer. So I'm saying that to say, that we don't have to have kids as early as we once thought we could. My mom years ago had Kendall and Kylie at 40 and 41.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And that was, what, 28 years ago or whatnot, 29 years ago. And so I think sometimes we have these expectations or we think by 32, if I don't have X, Y, and Z done, then it's over for me. But that's not essentially the case. And I think we have to focus on what makes us happy And everything else will fall into plan. And if it's in God's will, it's going to happen, not to get all spiritual.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But I do think what's meant for you is always going to find you no matter what. But you have to believe it's going to happen. And mainly you have to believe that you're worthy of that. There was a long time that I didn't think I was worthy of a certain type of love. And I think that shows.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I really had to work on myself and say that I'm worthy of the same type of love that so many other people are.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Well, we have vibrators. I mean, sure. But. I wasn't going to disclose all that. But, you know, yes, in the bedside drawer. But I have like – because I don't – so – I don't smoke weed recreationally, but I have weed pens to smoke to go to sleep because I hate the feeling so much that it just knocks. I could never smoke and talk to you.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So what's interesting is when we started, we were just supposed to be show filler. I think Lindsay Lohan had a reality show that was supposed to go on E and something happened where she scrapped it last minute. And E was like, we need something filler, just six episodes. And my mom and Kim were like, we're going to do it.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Or I don't know how that conversation went, but basically we had this show and And we were told, don't worry. I think the quote was, don't get too comfortable here. You're just filler. So when we first started, we were like, we just weren't thinking that people are going to watch this. Do you know what I mean? We were just like, we're filler. We're told not to get comfortable here.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I'm good. I'm really good. I'm really excited to be here. I called Kim on my way here. Oh my God. Was she like, don't say anything stupid. Don't give the family tea. No, I think she knows I probably will. So she's like, just think about all your answers. I'm like, I do not think before I speak. And that's my problem.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It is what it is. And so we were just being morons, like just who we are, like just not overthinking it. And it turned into something. It snowballed into something really great. But I didn't think everything through, if you will, and so I'm just being me. But I also have always tried to keep that for me. I don't want to overthink or else I think it really changes how the show is perceived.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And so with that, not that I want all of these things to be played out on the show, but I've really made a conscious effort to not edit and overthink I feel like it's fair game. If something's in the press that's true and that's happening, it's my obligation to have that on TV because that's what in fact is happening.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And that's not fair for me to say, you know what, I don't want that on the show because it's in the press or because it hurts me or whatever. I feel like I can't be the only one going through certain things.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And if it makes somebody else feel seen or if it helps somebody get through something, or it doesn't have to be the exact same thing, but if it's something that they can relate to at all, I really hope that I make someone feel more seen and safe and that they're not alone on this island that feels so incredibly isolating.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So with the Tristan stuff, when we... Kim, I think it was found out that Tristan was cheating on me when I was pregnant. She was, I, if I remember correctly, I think she was about to sit down for keeping up interviews and it happened while she was in the interview chair. I don't know if as much would have been shown if that's not how it was unfolding in real time.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
We just happened to be filming all the fucking time. So it did happen that way. Um, And then that happened. I went into labor 48 hours later and I chose for... I agreed to have the cameras in the delivery room because I wanted that for true. And I chose for Tristan to be there because it wasn't about me. And people couldn't get over that. And also, I've never had a baby before at this point.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It's my first pregnancy. I want to have what I envision, like we just talked about. But I also wanted... I just wanted what I wanted. And I don't know if that was the right thing. And I don't know. I just did what I felt was the right thing to do by saying to my daughter, your dad was in the delivery room. I don't need to tell her.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
One day she's going to know everything because she's going to be old enough to know. But I don't think she needs to know, oh, I didn't have your dad in there because I was so angry. Do you know what I mean? I felt like these are – I can't make a permanent decision off of temporary emotions. I'm not going to hate Tristan forever, but I will never get that birth experience back.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
You're just like, listen. I either will hysterically laugh the whole time. My mom and I did gummies together on the show and- I don't know. They didn't kick in because we're not used to gummies. And we went to a restaurant and we were so high at the restaurant and we're crying and we ate like five bags of chips and we're just like, we're ridiculous.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So there's so many things I did for my child at that time. And I remember I was in Cleveland. I was staying there after the birth of True. And I was in this isolated bubble of being alone with my child, with these hormones. I would not watch TV. It was a huge media story. I couldn't even leave the house. We were surrounded by paparazzi. It was really isolating and overwhelming. I had no family.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I honestly don't know, but Little by little, Tristan and I just started reconnecting. And seeing this man with your brand new baby and all these things, yes, you do get blinded by so many things. I'm not going to deny that. But interestingly enough, I always had this guard up after that. I always felt something wasn't right. And that is something that I don't regret because I have Tatum.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But that's something that I always remind myself. I could never fully get back there. And he knew that. And we would talk about it. And we even did therapy over it. And I never could fully trust him or I never felt safe around him again. And either if he hugged me or little things like that, there were things that... Anybody could tell that I had major guards up.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And so I'm not saying what I did was right, but there was God had other plans because I had my son, but there was something that I pushed to the side and I don't know why it could have been that I was just so hormonal and new. I don't know. Um, But yeah, it's just I know if I didn't have a baby, I never would have stayed with Tristan, like ever.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I think the first one hurt the most because I was pregnant. But also, I didn't get to sit with my feelings enough for the first one. I gave birth... less than 48 hours later after the first cheating scandal happened with Tristan.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I don't know if this sounds right, but it's what I can think to say is that I don't even think I was able to process everything that happened because I think if I maybe was six months pregnant and that happened, I probably would have walked away and never went back. But because I gave birth less than two days later and then you're you sort of.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But so I have people that are always like, oh, I didn't know you smoke. I'm like, I sort of don't. I just smoke to go to sleep because I have a hard time sleeping.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I buried my head in the sand and I was like, I just want to have this bliss that I always dreamed of and have a brand new baby and have the daddy here. And and I think who wouldn't. But it's really when you've never been in that position, it's really easy to judge and to say things. I only did the best that I knew how.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I think the worst part of that experience was how much I let down my younger sisters. Because I remember they were like, he's going to do this again. Don't like stay with him. And I remember, I don't know exactly what was said, but I just remember sort of the like the disappointment in them.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
They would never say that to me and they've never said that to me, but I've always felt how much I've disappointed them by staying and doing that again because I didn't do that. I was always like, fuck him and they're disrespecting you. And so I still feel really horrible about that because I've always been this big sister to them. But I will say, so I don't
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Maybe the second one hurt more because I lived with it for so much longer. And maybe I've had more shame with the second scandal because I sort of knew it was going to happen again.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
talk to Kylie and Kendall about it like now having hindsight like I realized like I never I still have this like feeling that I let you guys down and I like I would talk to them about anything but I don't think they would ever admit that I let them down because I don't I don't think that they realize how much I saw in their faces and
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Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Like I don't think – and I think now True is going to be seven next month. And so seven years have gone by. And so much life has happened for Kendall and Kylie as well. So maybe they even understand more than seven years ago. But I'll never forget their faces. And I don't think for a second they would even feel like I disappointed them.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But I remember those faces and it's hard to forget something like that.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Turn the brain off a little bit. And I also have something Courtney gave me for Christmas. It's called a biocharger. What is that? Exactly. It looks like a device from Back to the Future. I'm not kidding. I don't know if this generation knows what Back to the Future is. But it's this big ass device, like the size of this chair. And someone has to come and give you a tutorial.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
It's just perspective. But I probably would have done the same if I saw someone going through that. And sometimes you can see a car crash happening before it actually happens. And when you asked which one hurt more...
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Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
at first like my initial reaction was oh the one with true the first one but then I was like but actually no I think the second one because I I had so much more time to live with it and you know I hid it from public that I was having a second baby, even though I found out he had another child. And then I had to deal with this privately. And that was almost worse.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But I was so ashamed to tell the world that I was having another baby because I already knew what they were going to say. And I already knew what everyone was going to say about me. And I already knew in my gut that that was probably going to happen again. And then that sounds... Why would you be with someone?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But there was just this, now I knew in hindsight, oh, that's what that feeling was of never feeling safe with him again. That I just, my body sort of knew a woman's intuition. This isn't the right fit for you. But at the time I couldn't identify what that is. I don't know if that makes sense.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Well, from my experience, I don't think people really can change in that regard. But I also think, I don't know, I would have to know like the context of the story. I don't want to like tear anyone's dreams down. For me, I would say, once people show you who they are, believe them. And that's something I had to learn the hard way. And also, you have to listen to your gut and your intuition.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I really was trying to mute mine, I think, because I wanted to have this vision of what my life was more than I would listen to something. But what kind of life is that?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Also, it's like you have to ask people if they want this gift. You don't just spring it on them because where am I putting such a thing? But it is really cool actually. It does
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And the advice I would give when I was single with no kids is so different than the advice I would give having kids. And it's really, really fucking hard when you have children involved and you have this fairy tale that you really want to fulfill and live out and you can and don't, but that doesn't mean that another fairy tale can't be created.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I know that's sad because I think in your 20s, you really believe that love is all you need. Um, and Lamar was one of Lamar is, you know, I really do think it was the right person, wrong time. And I have so much love for Lamar and I, and every relationship that I have, like, I'm so grateful for them, even the worst of them.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Like, I really think that they mold me and they make me more empathetic and compassionate and they just, they build me in a different way. Um, yeah. And with Lamar, that was one of the best. It's crazy because it was one of the best chapters of my life. And then also, it took away so much of my innocence.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
There were things that I was exposed to that I never in a million years thought I would be exposed to. I definitely lived a double life for a long time. And again, even things I never would have even predicted that I would have been living or I don't think people could imagine.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But when it was one of the most awkward things I've ever filmed, Lamar and I have so much history and to not talk to someone in almost 10 years and then to be around them and I didn't know what to expect. I was nervous. He was clearly very nervous. I felt like without me realizing it, because we sat for four and a half hours. So what you guys saw, I think was maybe a 20, 30 minutes tops.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
We were there for four and a half hours. And there were things that I didn't realize until watching. I sort of blacked out. And it was just my trauma taking over. And this was me in autopilot. And how many things either he did or said that were triggering me to the old Lamar. So I noticed myself being short or snappy or this or that. And I didn't like that version of me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I'm sure he didn't like that version of me or whatnot. And maybe I triggered him in different ways. I don't know. But it was... I really love that I got that experience with him, but I think there's so much more that maybe needs to be said and done. But I also don't know if I need that right now.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I didn't think for a second I still was holding on to anything. And so then when I was with him or certain like just certain things that either made me have flashbacks to 10 years ago, I was I just noticed that I turned my brain off. Because so much I didn't even remember being said or done until I watched the show.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I was like, oh, damn, that was a little harsh or I can't believe I said that to him. But it's wild that I would black out at daytime. It's not like I was on anything. That's why I was like – it was so bizarre to me. I've never been in that situation before. Yeah. Um, but I also, like, I'm so grateful for all those experiences too. And I, but I do think maybe more does need to be discussed.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I just don't feel the need or the urgency to do it right now. Do you think you would ever get married again? I would love to get married again. You would? Yeah. A lot of people think that I am very like maybe cynical about love and I'm a hopeless romantic. I believe in love and I think it's beautiful and I love love. the union of marriage. I respect it so much. And you're single right now?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I'm single right now. Are you dating? I have not dated in over three years since... Chloe! Tatum was in my surrogate's belly. Okay. Would you... Yeah, over three years.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Nobody cares about the radiation when it comes to their phone.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So I think I need to work on things with myself still because I'm really happy. I don't feel lonely. I don't feel any of that stuff. I feel great, which is actually like concerning because I feel like I could go this way for like 10 more years.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I'm watching my documentaries. No one's bothering me, taking a bed space. Like I'm good. But I also think a lot of it is too that I don't know I've worked on my confidence so much and I've gotten that back or in a good place. But I don't know how confident I am in trusting myself when it comes to picking men just because of my past. And so I'm working on that.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And I don't want just distractions in my life. I'm not lonely or bored in that regard. If I need a night out, I have my girlfriends. And I just don't – once you get to a certain place – You don't even miss a thing. I don't need anything. But I need to work on feeling confident in who I'm picking. Okay.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Doesn't? No, I love that. That's like a big turn on.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Right. Then that makes me like, oh, that's weird. Because what are you? Are you have a family that you're hiding from? Yeah.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Oh, that would be so hard. I don't think so.
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Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Yeah, basically. And she I probably care because she hangs out with me more than my sisters half the time.
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Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Kendall. Kendall and Court. But Kendall is like no nonsense. Love that for you. I love that for her too.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Today, she was like, don't bring up the blowjob story. I was like, I'm so sorry. I'm like, but it was true. She's like, well, it doesn't make me look good. And I was like, well, it was like the early 90s. It was a different time.
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Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
No, I feel like she's the intrusive one. But you ask her and she might have a different story. Okay. So she spies like if ever there's cars in the driveway because we have two different driveways, but you can see both of them. And she will always ask like, oh, I see there's a white car outside. Whose car is that? And I'm like, I don't fucking know. And like, stop asking me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Like, come on. It was the early 90s. It's fine. So good. I don't know. I mean, she's just a very forward thinking type of mother. And she's the thing that I love about my mom is you can literally tell her anything and she's fine with it. She just wants to be in the know and she will find like she's also a problem solver. So if there's anything that's not going right, she'll find help.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
the solution. So I don't know off the top of my head, but she will help the girl out.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
You want to know what's crazy? What? The older we get, the pull gets smaller. I'm like, I don't know. I think if I was 20, I would probably be like, that's a deal breaker.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But now I'm like, Do we need to talk about it? We're good, right?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I don't know if that... Like, is that... That's not bad.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
If they have a baby together... Oh, that's where we draw the line. Okay, we're not... Yeah, we're not sharing baby daddies, but... I don't know if you slept with someone 20 years ago. What the fuck am I supposed to do? It's hard out here. I kind of agree. Like, especially if they're like, oh, he was so good and a great guy. How awkward. But I personally wouldn't care.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Like, if this was me and let's say Kim or Kourt or whoever single was like, oh, I met this guy. I'm like, oh, my God, I fucked him when I was 20. But it's fine. Like, I wouldn't care.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
No, I draw the line. Like maybe hooking up because I can hook up with people and like not think about it. I'm not one. Really? I can't. I haven't done it in a while, but you don't get those days. I mean, when I was younger, I was able to. I don't. It's a different world when you have kids. I don't know. But also I think it's more like it's transactional. Like this is business because I have kids.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Like get in here. Let's do it. Get in here and get out. You're not staying because you're not meeting my kids. So that's where my mindset I think is. But I cannot. And yes, I'm going to stereotype. I will not be with another NBA player. But yes, if I need to fuck or whatever, maybe. Maybe. I don't know. I'm not there, but I'm not going to say no, but I don't know what I just said. No, no, no.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
No, ideally not. Okay. But again, I would hook up, but you know, never say never, but I just, I don't feel like I'm a year later. I know you're later. I'm like, I'm married. I'm getting married. I mean, and I hate to stereotype, but I haven't had great experiences is all I'm going to say. Girl, that is so fucking fair.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Well, I am. It's Chloe in Wonderland. So it's all about like, go down the rabbit hole with me. I have so many bizarre curiosities and I sincerely am just fascinated by the strangest things. I just watched a documentary on atomic bombs and I am like, Hell yes. I'm so dorky in that way that people probably wouldn't think.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But yeah, I just want to talk about – I really have bizarre weird fascinations and I want to indulge in them. Are you going to have your sisters on the pod? So the funny thing is Kylie was like, I'm so offended you haven't asked me to be on the podcast. And I'm like, well – what are you going to give me? What would you give me that I don't already know about?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I'm 40 years old and I have two kids like it's. She's very curious as to who's over there all the time. But what I found out recently that she does is when I'm not home, I guess she finds out that I'm not home and she goes in my closet and she looks at things to borrow or take. And I found that out actually today. Wait, how did you find it out? Because I asked her, I was like, God,
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I already know it's going to be very contrived. I don't need this. But most people would die to have my sisters on. I'm more like, whatever. We'll think about it. But my mom, yes. Yes. Love Kris Jenner. Because we also are like, Laverne and Shirley, Lucy and Ethel. Don't know if these people know who that is. But, you know, we're just like fun.
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Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Yes. And I have like a list of things what I should have asked about. And I just, it's too much pressure for me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So I love Dolly Parton. I really, really do.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I know I love her, but her poor husband just passed away of 60 years and my heart breaks for her. I'm not kidding.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Not the right time. But at one point, maybe one day I love her, but I do. I'm so excited. I just had this UFOologist on and I love shit like that. So like.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
You've done an excellent job. Yeah, I wouldn't change a thing. Like as sad or hard and you know, depressing or whatever, as some situations may have been, the great outweighs all the bad that's ever happened to me. And I am just proud of how I've handled everything. And I'm most proud of how me and my family have stuck together and just enjoy the ride.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
what, like, I just need to know what, because I keep getting alerts, like, Kris Jenner is on your property. And I'm like, but what are you doing? Like, it's always when I'm gone, do you not know that I'm not, like, that I'm home or not home? And she's like, oh, well, I just wanted to look in your closet for something. I was like, well, what are you looking for?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And she's like, just to see if there's anything I could borrow. And I'm like, to me, I'm like, you could ask. And you're doing it intentionally when I'm gone. Maybe she loves the thrill. Chris loves the thrill of snooping around. Oh, she does. But then I'm like, well, what else are you looking through? All my drawers.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Yes. What does Chris think right now? I think she wants to be here. She was dying. I think I was like, oh, I'm doing this at two. And she's like, if you need to call me just at any time. And I'm like, okay. So I think she really wants to be here. You're like, mom? Give me some time. This is my thing. You can come on next, Chris. Oh, she will.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
You love it. So I do love it. And especially like when you're going to have kids and all of that, that's going to be... It's what people – well, I think people dream of stuff like this. Maybe not being directly next door where we don't even have like a property line. We're a little too close. But 10, 15 minutes, that's such a blessing. And send your kids over there.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
But it's also you don't have – like have your parents – like you got to have dinners with them and there's no excuse. I think it's the best. Do your sisters think you're insane? We all live in the same gated community. But they're not directly. No. You can see through a window. Correct. Yeah. Yeah. So they think I'm insane. But then Kylie is the one that wishes she's like me.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
She's like, I wish I was next to mom. And I'm like, well, we could always trade houses. So, yeah.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Right now, because it does change, but it changes on probably who's doing the most. I don't know. But if like she was here, she's going to say me because I'm here. But it always goes between Kim and Kylie, those two.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Yeah, no, I am. But see, I know where I stand. Like, I don't care. You don't need the flowers. No, it doesn't bother me because I'm also like, girl, you're the one that calls me for everything. So we're good.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
She has. Oh my God. She has more times than less, her and Kim. So I think that saying is like, cool. I'm like, mom, that's so badass. And I think sometimes it bothers her. And I'm like, why does that bother you? But- Kim has known about the cheating. I think both of the cheating stuff, I think Kim found out first. I know definitely this, I think both, which is crazy before I knew.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And then my mom with my ex-husband, she knew things before I did and had to tell me, or even now, like just the other day, she had to tell me something crazy. And I was like, are we okay that this is still happening?
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I would rather a family member than a stranger.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I agree. Yeah. I don't like that any of this stuff happens, but I would rather it them. I'm not someone that gets mad at the messenger.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Well, and we always say we get how you see
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
someone that's in the limelight and then they're sort of they spiral out of control and I also get that because they don't have anyone else that's going through it with them like even if they have a family with them if they're not in the forefront sometimes it's really hard to understand what that person's going through and we feel really fortunate that even at the worst of it we're like but at least we get it together and we can really support one another and
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So I would say that for a few years, and I think it started with COVID, I think sort of everyone became social recluses for a minute, but that was my good initiation into being a recluse. And then it took me a good four years to get out of it. I feel like this last, since I've been 40, I've been 40 for like six months or something, but I feel now I'm a little more social, but I'm choosy.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
And no one can ever go too far because we're like, snap out of it. We know what you're going through. You can have a bad month, a bad week, whatever. But we're there to support each other and get each other out of it. And they're not relatable conversations that you can have with your girlfriends. And I get that. And so for you to vent these things to your friend group, they're going to be like,
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
What are you taught? Like, I don't care. And those aren't real problems, but they're real in my reality. So it's nice where you have this circle of trust that you feel safe with and you can vent about the most superficial, ridiculous things, but they matter to you at that moment. And so it is a blessing.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
The one with all the baby daddies is the entire family group chat. And that is like my grandma, my cousin Cece. It's like everyone. There's the OG group chat, which is just the siblings and my mom. There's sisters and mom, because maybe my brother, if we're talking about men or whatever, my brothers want to hear it. There's just sisters. Courtney's removed herself out of some group chats.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
So I know she thinks... Or at one point, Kim outed everyone and said there was a not Courtney group chat. That has been gone. But now there is a not Courtney group chat, but unintentionally because she left a group chat. But when people leave, I love to add them back. Like, who the fuck do you think you are? You are not leaving. And then they get pissed. I just keep adding them.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
Chloe, she's like, leave me alone. Well, who runs away from a conversation? Either have it or mute us like Kendall and Kylie does.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I have to say, liar. I could do it like that. Okay. You didn't FaceTune your cat. No, I didn't. Okay. Love that. And just so you know, because I was like, wow, that's crazy that people would think that. I tried to see if it would work in FaceApp and it doesn't. So if somebody just wanted to check, you can't do it.
Call Her Daddy
Khloé Kardashian: I’m Done with NBA Players
I tried because I was like, I just need to know if you fucking can because that's insane if it lets you FaceApp an animal and you can't.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But I wake up a lot and I'm like, oh, I'm just in either a melancholy mood or I'm woke up on the wrong side of the bed. I'm not a nice person today. And I'll look myself in the mirror and I will have a back and forth talk with myself. And I'm like, no, I'm happy today. I'm choosing happy. But so much of that came really when I was in my 40s, maybe my last 39th year. Yeah.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Because I realized how much of a dark cloud I felt was surrounding me in my 30s. But yes, things happen to me, but it's also my responsibility to choose how I respond to those things. And I think because of social media, maybe as well, that I let so much of the noise make me even sadder or make me feel like I was less worthy, less of a person that I needed to be so...
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
crumbled and embarrassed about what happened to me where yes I probably would have had those feelings but maybe not as long as I did because that narration was going on for so long and so I finally was sort of like screw every every dark noise I'm hearing and I'm going to say every day no I am worthy I'm worthy of a happy beautiful positive day being intentional in that way and it's
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
funny when I wake my kids up every day, I'm like, we're going to have a happy day because we choose to have a happy day. But embedding in them those small little affirmations, I mean, I'm 40 and I need it. So, you know, I think it's a good thing.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I'm not a victim to this, but I do feel like I was in a way victimizing myself. But again, it sort of was more from the outside noise. I hate that I allowed other people to have that much control over the way I viewed myself. But I would say just from my past dating history, and a lot of them ended in cheating, or there was just, they weren't great situations at the end. But
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Yes, I think even in the most private of times if that happened and nobody publicly knew about it, there's still shame within your family. You feel embarrassed. Like, you know, what did I do? You always make it about yourself. And that's okay because hopefully you will get stronger and reflect and not make those same mistakes again. And for me... They happened repeatedly.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I was like, okay, this is about me. I'm either not paying attention. I'm sweeping something under the rug. I really wanted to be so aware of what I was doing and let that go. But let the guilt and the shame of that go because I, quote, allowed it to happen more than once. And I'm saying that because I didn't allow it to happen. But The narrative out there was like, well, you get what you get.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I should have known better. And yes, I probably should have. But I needed to learn that lesson. I know I carried so much shame and guilt where there would be times that I was like, I don't even want to go out to the grocery store and look at someone in the eyes because I feel like I know what they're thinking about me. They probably don't know who I am. They probably have never heard this story.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But the shame, this cloud that was... I felt following me everywhere that I don't know if it was even that big to other people, but I definitely felt like I was constantly surrounded by a gray cloud. I would limit myself from doing a lot of things and seeing a lot of people because I felt such shame where I was like intentionally, no, I'm going to let this go.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Well, the interesting part is I think the very first time it happened, I didn't do that. And that's okay because it's done. And I also had to forgive myself for that. There was a time that I felt very guilty. Like, why did I even stay? Why am I not forgiving myself? I would blame myself forever.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
All right, we're ready. I am Khloe Kardashian. Khloe Kardashian, everybody. Khloe Kardashian. There would be times that I was like, I don't even want to go out to the grocery store because I feel like I know what they're thinking about me. And that was scary to me because I've never been in a dark place for that long.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And then the second time, you know, I, my surrogate was still pregnant with Tatum and the people didn't know yet that I was having Tatum, but I felt such shame that it was happening again because I knew I knew better.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
No, and that's what I mean. I think people also need to be patient with themselves. Like if they don't, if you're not feeling accountable in some of the actions that you're making or something, what someone else is doing to you, that's okay. There will be a day that you will wake up.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And listen, if I was watching me when I was in my 20s, I would be judging that person too and being like, she's so stupid. It's going to happen again. I don't blame people for their judgment. I think with life comes great wisdom and life experiences. And if my story helped anybody else feel less alone, because it's such an isolating feeling.
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You feel like you're on this island and it doesn't happen to anybody else. And sadly, it does. And I know so many people that stay longer than I did. And not that it's right, but you have to let go when you really feel like you're ready. Or I think that person will always feel like, well, what if and this and... I really just like to live my life in this. No, I'm solid in that action.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I'm solid in that choice that I made.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And trust me, I was that person. All of us. Yes. When I was younger, I used to, you either read something and you have a comment about it or one of your friends or family members. And yes, and then you live your life and you go through it and you're like, hmm. Okay, I get it a little bit more. Yeah.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Gosh, that's a deep one, Jay.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I mean, oh my gosh. Well, I am not always kind to myself. And I think I am my biggest bully and critic and all of those things at times. And it is much easier for me to forgive others than myself. I will say that. Forgiving myself has really been more of the last three years of my adult life.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But I was so great at giving other people grace, forgiveness, making like, not excuses for them, but just like always coming to their defense, no matter how wrong they've done me. Because I have feel like it's not my place to judge them. And I don't know everything they're going through and that type of thing.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And then one day I was like, but why don't I give myself the same energy that I'm giving so freely to other people? And a lot of it comes through my prayer and my I really had to also say to myself that this isn't about me. What these people have done, it's not just relationships in so many different levels. And there are times that you feel like, okay, what is it?
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Why do so many people take advantage or lie, cheat, steal, whatever it is? You can be angry, you can have your feelings, but sometimes you feel like, oh, it must be me because it's happened so many times. And that's also why I feel like boundaries are so important to set. And I never had boundaries before. And I think that was a big thing.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But I think a lot of that is releasing it and just knowing that that's not your burden to carry.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Because then also if you're like, well, that's not because of me. Like when people say it also in that way, they're like, well, you know, like if everyone says that, whatever, then it has to be you too. So there's that fine line.
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In that for sure. But I think when you're just aware and when you're solid in yourself, I really do think it's okay to release those things. And if you are doing the work, and the work doesn't have to be therapy, like with an actual therapist. If you have a group of friends and if those people really are unbiased and not judgmental and you can go to that... do that.
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For me, I really enjoy writing. It's not for people to see. It's just, it's a form of expression for me. And I feel like I'm really getting this energy out of my system. And sometimes I'll write and I'm like, I'm tearing this up. So no one ever sees it. And I don't even know what I'm going to start writing. I'm like, I just got to get this on from pen to paper. And It's such a release.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And sometimes that's the quote therapy that I need or the conversation that I need. A lot of the times it's the gym, it's whatever. But once I get to that point that I'm like, okay, light bulb goes off. I'm like, yes, I could have done things differently, but I'm not the reason why this happened to me. Like there's really no excuse for certain behavior.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But yes, I probably could have handled things differently or saw things differently. But I think people have to be, and not just play the victim, but not also play that they're this champion and this crusader, there definitely has to be, there's a good and bad to all of us if we want to admit it or not.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And you're able to laugh about it.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And the same sentiment should be held for our past mistakes. Like, Haven't you ever done anything and then it mortified you where you were so angry at yourself? And then five years later, you will hysterically laugh about it with your wife or whatever. Yeah. And that's the best. Yes. And that's how I think most of our failures, mistakes in life should be. Sure, at the moment, they're horrible.
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And they make you feel really bad. But how beautiful is it when you have so much growth from that and you're a completely different person in a beautiful way. And then you look back and you can laugh at that, at something that made you sob, cry in a corner and you were in a fetal position. You didn't want to see anyone. And then you're like, No. Okay. I had a bad moment.
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It's not a bad life and I could move on and be stronger and better. But sometimes we let those moments consume us and we never get out of them. And for me, that's a place that I never want to be because I felt like I was in that place. for a few years. And that was scary to me because I've never been in a dark place for that long of a place of shame and guilt and all of that.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I'm so excited to be here.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And then finally I just said to myself, okay, enough. No one wants to be around someone when you're like, how's your day? Fine. And not that I was that person, but internally I felt like I was that person. I love being happy and joyful and like life is so great if you look for the good.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Okay, that's crazy.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Mm-hmm.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
He can give you the recipe, but you got to put all the cake mix and everything together and bake the cake. And I think so many times people expect it just like to be magic, get me out of there. And they don't want to do the works. The work is scary. Being alone is scary with the self-reflection and writing and all that. Like, cause once you're like, Oh, I have to face myself.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And that seems a little daunting and people like to distract and not come to terms with who they are. For me, I, And again, being in my 20s, I did a lot of distracting. It's fun to distract, especially at that age and you don't have kids and you can do whatever. And so I remember that after my divorce or even when my dad died, my dad died when I was 19.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I remember going out every night because I was an avoidant. Let me avoid these feelings. If I'm not feeling them, they're not happening anymore. Well, that didn't work too well. I remember losing all my hair, gaining so much weight, hyperventilating like when I would be alone. When I got a divorce, very similar. Let me go out, let me party, drink, hang out with new guys. What does that get me?
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
You know, I realized, okay, these ways of coping didn't work for so many years that when this time happened and maybe a little help of COVID, it was... around 2022, 2021, 2022, but still things were still sort of locked down a little bit. And I just said, no, I'm not gonna date anyone. And now I have kids too. I'm not going to a club. Like, what am I doing?
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But having to face myself and intentionally be alone, intentionally do the work, intentionally every day I wake up at 5 a.m. because I need that alone time to have my coffee, do my prayers, listen to my Bible app, like whatever it is that makes you whole. I need that. And I know when I don't have that, how different my day feels.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I like to set my intentions for the day or my workouts, the clarity I get, just whatever it is, everyone's going to be different. If you need to be outside, you have to decide that. But it did take me a long time of doing other things and seeing how horrible those things served me for me to find, okay, this I like. And yes, it's easy for me to go and date a man and
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
be an avoidant and distract these real feelings. But then what? The same thing is probably going to happen to me again because I don't know what I'm doing. And I'm just willy-nilly going through life. And what? Because somebody is cute or this. I'm not paying attention to the core of people and even to the core of myself.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I just started listening to myself and finding the things that really made me feel whole but alone. And I know so many of my friends cannot be alone because they don't want to hear their own thoughts. They don't want to start working on themselves. And I'm not judging that, but I know how amazing it is to be alone with myself and to like who I am.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Black holes could be a consequence of the way that we understand the universe.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
We all adore you. We really, really do. And you just have this energy about you that everyone feels safe and talking with you. And that's a testament to the success of your podcast, obviously. But everything that you do, it's so from the intensity of your soul and it's beautiful and you don't even realize that you're being recorded when talking with you.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I understand how difficult it is to change your mindset. Your mind is a muscle. I get it. And we are... humans by nature, like they love a routine. You find comfort in that. I totally get that. So I'm not saying, oh, it's so easy. Go ahead and do this. No, but it's little practices every day. Yeah.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
So for me, I never really thought I needed to go the conventional route. Kimberly was also anti-therapy for her own reasons. And I want to say maybe two years ago, maybe a little bit longer, she started seeing a therapist that she really, really liked. And she just suggested I meet with her. And I actually really liked her. I really enjoy speaking with her. This might sound...
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
So yes, I'm so honored to be asked to be here again.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
silly, but she is, you know, she's like from our neighborhood. Like there's so many things that she gets us on. And I also love how chill she is. Like at the beginning, when I would talk to her, she was like, I think I need to see you three days a week. And I was like, three days a week?
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I remember telling Kendall and Kendall was like, I've never heard of someone seeing a therapist three days a week. Do you need to go to a mental institution? Like, are you okay? And I was like, oh my gosh, is that not normal? And we started talking, me and the therapist more and more. And she was like, okay, I think you're like, you're actually really self-aware and you're great.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I just, I had this little hump that I think I needed her a little bit more, maybe because I was just getting started, I'm not sure. And I love that she's also very chill. She's like, call me when you need me. She checks in on me by text. She's more... like a friend and you just feel, I feel like I could trust her. And that's very rare for me.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I also think because of her relationship with Kim, she felt like more of a friend as opposed to this traditional therapist. And that's not bad or good, but because of my experience with past therapists, I didn't want something that was very traditional. Because I couldn't trust that. So I don't see her on a weekly basis anymore. I know when I need to see her, I will.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I cannot even believe that you, yes, I am so grateful that you agreed to do that. But you were my second guest and the fact that you did that and did it just, sure, of course. Like you never ask questions. I'm like, this is brand new. We've never launched or aired yet. Thank you. You're so generous and so kind.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But we do our check-ins every now and again. But I honestly feel like I'm in such a good place. And I also don't think that there's one which way that people can or need to get any help or life coaching, if you will. I think that it's not a one size fits all. I think everyone, whatever you're willing to try, try it. And whatever you feel like really speaks to your soul, then that's the way to go.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
That's really hard. And it took me over 10 years to see a therapist again. And so many people be like, I think you need therapy. And I was like, well, I'm sure I do, but I don't feel comfortable talking to anybody. And definitely at first I would talk to her so monotone, so matter of fact, she would even say, you don't have emotion when you're speaking.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And for me, I had to turn off the emotional switch in me. And I would tell stories very much because they are matter of fact, when I'm giving you the facts, but it was more like I'm, it wasn't me. I'm just reading off somebody's life story. And one of our activities or homework assignments basically was me writing from the mini traumas to the big traumas in my life and writing them down.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And the more I would write them down, I was like, this is ridiculous. Like how many mini to major traumas there are. And then we would go line by line and talk about them as opposed to just being like – this happened and this and throwing everything under the rug. She wanted to dissect everyone, not to be nosy, not for, I felt it.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Like there's some people I meet with that I'm like, I do not trust this person. I'm not going to give them anything. And she really worked hard to earn my trust. That made me feel safer with her. And just to sort of get why I am so dead about some of the things that I should probably be crying about if I'm telling somebody this story that I'm telling.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But the trust took a long time, but I will say, because I trust all of my siblings with everything in me, That normally if it is an introduction through them, my guards do go down. And Kim has had her own crazy things that she's not very trusting with either. So for her to trust, I was like, okay, I think I'm a little safe here. Yeah.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
biography. And I'm like, okay. She would just keep asking me, you don't have any feeling when you read these? And I was like, well, yeah. And I would start laughing. And she's like, okay, well, not laughter because I would feel so uncomfortable. And then that's my nervousness. And I realized once I was, I would be like, okay, sort of get my own ego out of the way.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Like I had to strip myself down and it took a few times. Like she didn't want me to cry and relive this. She just was more fascinated how I was so numb to so many things. And it really made me more sad for myself because I felt as if, God, I've been through so many things that at this point I would rather not feel than feel because feeling is too much for me to handle.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And what is life if you don't feel things? Like I want to feel I do want to feel sadness too. Like I love feeling joy and happiness, but then why am I so, I get, I know why I'm so okay with that feeling, but also grief is also a beautiful thing because it's an expression of love. And I think being sad or hurt means that there was once something or someone that you valued and cared about so much.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And those were things that I had to learn and be like, it, It's okay. You're safe here. So it really just taught me to remind myself, like, we don't have to be numb to everything. And I use humor as an escape, as a defense mechanism. I do love to laugh and I do love humor. But I realize in really dark situations, I do tend to make a joke of it at some point. That's just my personality. Yeah.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I have to remind myself it's okay to cry or it's okay to have feelings that doesn't make me weak. And that's not even a thought I'm having like, oh, are they going to think I'm weak? But whenever I do cry, I tend to apologize afterwards for some reason.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And what an experience.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
No. I should probably ask her about that.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And what's so weird, my mom cried, like, I wish I was more like that. She cries at anything and everything like, but happy. Like, I don't know if I've cried happy tears ever. But I wish I was that type of person that I'm like, oh. goodness, the joy. Like, I wish I had a little bit of that. She maybe has too much. I wish she could sprinkle a little onto me, but I, and we're all different.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I don't know when this airs, but The India episode for us, I think, airs next week. So people are going to get to see that insight and see a little bit of where you practice and just what a beautiful experience that was for us.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I feel all those things. Like I'm probably too expressive with words sometimes, but maybe it's because I'm not a great, I don't cry very often at all. And maybe that's why, I don't know. Sometimes I turn on a sad movie just because I'm like, get the tears out. And sometimes they don't come out. Like there's, what is wrong with me?
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Yeah, well, it's definitely my love language. And I am such a maternal person. I've always been that person. And no one's ever said this to me.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And my parents are so loving and so incredible, but I used to feel, but I still love, like I still love taking care of people, but I used to feel like I wasn't worthy of like so many other things, but I knew if I took care of someone or was support, like then maybe I'd be worthy of them loving me back. And that's how I used to feel. And I don't know where that came from,
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But it's almost like I have to earn my place in this person's life. So if I'm there for them, then maybe like that's enough because what else do I have to offer was how I used to feel. When it comes to all the kids, I was very, not by my family, but by other people. I was always talked about my looks, always told that I was chubby. No one ever believed that I was my sibling's sibling.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
They would always say, oh, look, where'd she come from? Or she's related to you from like teachers. I remember so vividly. And that feeling of being always compared to them, but always not good enough to be considered their sibling. And I don't think these adults maliciously knew what they were doing, but it was so impactful that for children, I will do everything to include them,
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for them to never feel like that. And for adults too, but like with kids, I don't play. And I never want someone to feel the way I did. And so I want to be that rock for everyone. And I think also having so many brothers and sisters, we were raised with my stepdad's kids too, being in and out. We had four step siblings. So there was eight of us. And then at one point, 10 of us. And there's a lot.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And sometimes people just don't feel as seen as others. And Parents are doing the best that they can. And so I always have just wanted everyone to feel seen and supported. And from every sister and exes, it's just, I feel like they're always in our lives, that God puts people in our lives for a reason.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But I don't know, it's a part of me that I actually really love about myself because we've talked about it in therapy. She thinks I give my love. Well, what did she say? I don't want to mess it up. She's like, I think you give your love to others because you've never really felt that love yourself. But I know I've felt that from my parents.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
it's mainly from outside people that I've never really felt real genuine love. It was like, oh, they'll take me because they wanted Courtney, Kim and Rob or whatever. Like I always had to like, I was always the funny one. Cause I felt like that was how I would get attention because it wasn't because, oh, she's so cute or this or that.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Cause people always made such a point to tell me how much I did not look like Like them or things like that. So I felt like, well, those were the things that people praised me on. So let's keep them up.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
That was such, we could not miss that opportunity, especially to go with you. I mean, to where you practice. I mean, still, that's a pinch me moment.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
People are always so surprised that I'm not more cynical when it comes to love. And they always ask, do you ever think you're going to get married again? And I go, yes, I hope I'm going to get married again. I think marriage is the most beautiful union that there is. And I love that. I love family. I mean, look at our family. We can't get away from each other.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I know so many people dread turning 40 or just getting older. And I am the complete opposite. I probably talked about my excitement in turning 40 for at least three years prior to turning 40. You know, my 30s were challenging for me as... I really do think when I reflect back that they are challenging for most people.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I love every aspect of love, whether it be just for a friendship love or like I value that respect and that secrecy and that loyalty and whatever it is. And people are always surprised that I believe in love. I probably am more joyful now, especially with love than maybe five years ago.
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Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And it's because I feel like I know how to control myself more where before, you know, you just give things so freely and I love giving love. I love loving myself, loving my family and others. But I feel like I'm a little bit wiser with maybe whom I give it to so innocently.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I could not agree more. Like I cannot accept gifts from people. I feel so uncomfortable. But giving somebody a gift, I love. And I get so excited just for, because I like to give really thoughtful gifts. It's just the joy that you give to people. I love that. Yeah. I just love, and I, I do have a problem where I love people. I'm one, I was one of those kids.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
My mom was like, I could never leave you alone. You would just go talk to everyone. And I, but I've always been a people person. So, and I never want to see people in pain. I want to be that love and support for someone if, and when I can.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
So yeah, Lamar and I, the last time I saw him, I believe was 2016. Wow. And never spoke nothing since 2016, if my memory serves correctly. I was actually at Super Bowl last year, the one in Las Vegas. And my best friend Malika was there and she was staying somewhere else.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And she ran into him in a hotel lobby and they both just started like crying because they were really close and just embraced and they exchanged numbers. And so that's how the first intro happened. And for Lamar, when we divorced, Lamar was not in a good headspace. But Lamar's a seven foot tall man. We had all this custom furniture and he was like, just get rid of it all.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I don't want to just sell the house. And I'm like, what? I didn't know what to do with that. So for years, I kept a storage unit of all of his furniture, thinking one day he would want it. And years ago, before I had kids, thank you. Well, it's his and expensive and he's a big guy. Like you're going to want it. And I remember he was, before I had True, I think I was just pregnant.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I was like, you know what? I just, I don't need to hold on to this storage unit anymore. And he said through me, his friend who will go unnamed said, give him the storage keys and he'll take it for me. And I was like, cool, fine. I did so and I found out later down the line that this friend of his sold everything that was in the unit. And without Lamar knowing.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I think your 30s is that, especially for women, because that's sort of when people feel like, oh, their biological clock is ticking. They should be married or have kids by this age. And the truth is people are getting married a little later. They are having kids later in life. And a lot of women are focusing on what their careers should be.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And that broke my heart because I was like, I've saved these things for years. I could have got rid of it then, but these were his belongings and memorabilia from all of his sports stuff and whatever. So that broke my heart. When I moved from my last house during COVID, I think it was 2020 or 2021. I didn't think I had a thing of Lamar's. I found Lamar's six man of the year trophy.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I found his mom passed away when he was 12, I believe. I found stuff of his mother's. They were all in my attic, jewelry, all this stuff. And I held onto it and I said, I'm never gonna give this to somebody else unless it's Lamar. I'm gonna hold onto these things because now I don't trust his people around him. And when Malika reached out, when Malika told me she saw him, I said, that's so weird.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I just found his mom's driver's license last week. And I was like, okay. She's like, why don't you give it to him? I was like, let me think this over. And it took a few months for me to... want her to reach out to say like, do you want to meet up with me? Cause I wanted to do it. I didn't want to just drop it off. I didn't. I wanted to see him and make sure still that he was doing okay.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And at the time I didn't have any feelings. I was like, yeah, let's hang. Let's come over. Let's go to Malika's house. I didn't want to do it in public where it would be a big spectacle. I didn't want to do it at my house because my kids there and he knew about the cameras and He picked the time of the date. I never would have ambushed somebody about that. And he picked the time of the date.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
He flew in for it. And it's so weird when I thought I was totally cool. And when he came in, he was so nervous. And I was trying to reassure him, like, we're fine and whatever. And there would be times in our conversation that I started getting these feelings.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I don't know if they're triggers or... Because we've both experienced a lot of trauma together, Lamar and I. And there would be either little mannerisms or things that would flash me back to... 10, 15 years ago. And I didn't realize how triggered I was getting from Lamar.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Well, I could only say this because I would never tell somebody else's story. But I'm saying this because he said it on the episode. We didn't talk for 10 years because after his overdose, Lamar couldn't walk or talk. And he had a significant amount of seizures and strokes and needed to be rehabilitated. And I helped him through that journey.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And then when he was at a decent place, he started using again. And he said that on the show. That's why I'm saying it now. And from that moment was when I was paying for a house for him to be in. I was taking care of him. And I said, I can never see you again. Not that it was anything ever romantic. From my... I love Lamar with all my heart. Even today, I love, love, love him.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And so they're sort of putting the family stuff on the back burner. At least that's what I've noticed.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I know he was like one of the greatest loves of my life. It just other circumstances took over. But so I really sincerely wanted the best for him. When he started using again after such a horrific accident where he, in my opinion, is a miracle that he is alive today. I couldn't understand how someone would go and do that again.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And for me, I had my kids. I had not so many great relationships in my 30s and in my younger 20s. But a lot of career stuff wasn't going the way that I envisioned and hoped and planned. And I really just wanted to get out of my 30s. I was like, I feel good. I have my kids. And that's my wonderful, beautiful takeaway.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I get it's a disease, but it felt like you punched me in my stomach. And I put so much of my life on hold to take care of this person just for them to be like, that's fine. Like, I'm not sure how he felt about himself. It made me feel that he had no respect for his own life and for anything that I did for him as well.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And so from that moment on, I said, no, I'm not speaking to this person anymore because it does nothing for me. There's no benefit in this. I felt more like I would be taking care of him, but being lied to. I had so many negative thoughts. So that 10-year break, as sad as it was, it wasn't that hard for me anymore. Because I, it was, but it was sad.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I thought about him all the time and always wanting to make sure he's okay. And then when I saw him, like I loved seeing him. It was great. It was really sad at the same time. Seeing someone I thought I would never outgrow. I realized how much I outgrew him. And that made me sad. But I wonder, if we were still married, would we have grown together?
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And there were so many things that made me wonder even more. Like, would we have grown together? If we did stay together, would this have stopped? Or would that beast always be needing to be fed? But you can't live your life in the... what ifs of it all. But it definitely made me sad because I just felt like we were two totally different people and I never thought we would get to that place.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I'm happy for him. I am so happy that he's sober and he's doing these great things with his life. And those are things that anyone should be rooting for. Yeah. I'm also proud of him for meeting with me because as much as scary or as nerve wracking and yeah, scary as it was for me to meet with him, I could only imagine how he felt because we left on really bad terms on his end.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
So I'm sure it was scarier for him.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I don't have any anger or resentment. I really, really don't. And And I don't know if this is a bad or a good thing, but me and all my siblings, my mom could be on the fence with this one, but definitely me and my siblings. When we, like we will be mad in the moment and curse someone out and yada, yada, you give us a year and we're like, we love that person. What are you like?
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
We don't ever hold on to that bad stuff. And we don't know if that's necessarily good. Sometimes you need to remember what people are capable of, but we're like, oh, but they're great. And we'll recite these great things. But I also think it is a beautiful thing because I want to remember the good. I know what you are capable of, but I don't need to hold on to all of the stuff that happened too.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Because I also feel like... That was their journey. That was for them to experience and go through. And I was just a bystander. Yes, I went through it as well. But that journey is really for that other person.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Yeah, no, it's forgive and don't forget. And I think so much of it is empathy, right? I think that... That's huge, Chloe.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And still, I also do believe that any of those experiences, they really are formative. And no matter how traumatic and horrible they are, you don't think that in the moment. But later on, you do get to self-reflect and be like, okay, I needed that for some reason. But going into my 40s, I was skipping and leaping and hopping into them.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Well, because most people say, oh, because you're so weak.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I think it is a strength. Like whenever I remember when... Tristan's mother passed away and Tristan has a brother that's disabled. And his mother was Amari, is Tristan's brother's name. Tristan's mom was Amari's sole caretaker and she passed away. Tristan's house was under construction. We had all these crazy rains, his roof caved in. Tristan and I were not speaking at this time.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Like there was not a chance I would speak to him. And when Andrea passed away, I remember having Amari and Tristan move in with me because yes, he could have gone to a hotel, but Tristan and Amari both needed to be not isolated. They both lost their mother. Amari needs special living arrangements. There's a lot that comes with Amari. And so I was like, live here. Your kids are here.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I got so much crap for that. And I'm thinking, do you guys think this is weak? I wasn't speaking to this man. 15 minutes ago. And now I'm offering to give my house here. And that, to me, takes so much more strength. And also to walk around the house in front of my kids and smile. Because I'm not fighting in front of my kids. I don't do stuff like that. And with Lamar. For Lamar...
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
When his accident happened, his overdose happened at a brothel and he, you know, it's not like the, like I, I showed up at the hospital, not because I'm weak, because I was strong and I needed to take care of him because who else would have? And I think people don't realize how much strength comes in those things. And it doesn't mean I forget.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
It just means there's something bigger here that's going to take precedence. And I need, my moral compass says, I need to show up and honor that. And that's just mine.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
So I don't know if you've ever seen this meme, but it's a meme of the Golden Girls. And I think those ladies were in their 40s or early 50s when they're ushered away somewhere in Florida at, you know, have to live together because they're so old. And then they do side by sides with like a bunch of women in their 40s now, beautiful women. And the comparison, you're like, why was I so afraid?
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Tristan could have got a hotel, but you know, but with Amari and then, and I wanted Tristan to be with his brother because I've been with that family for years, but Amari knows he just lost his mother. He needs to be around his brother. And there was so many things, but yeah, no, I think,
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I think where some people call it weakness, they don't realize how much strength goes into putting your own personal feelings aside for the betterment of somebody else.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Oh my gosh, I wish my phone's in the other room, but I dropped her off at school today and they each wrote something about someone and True wrote, I love my mommy because there's kindness in her soul and she's six and I help her do her homework, which both were sweet, but... The sentence, there's kindness in her soul. I was like, what a profound thing to say and a deep thing for a six-year-old.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
It was so beautiful. And that makes me feel that I'm doing something right. Yeah. They don't love their mommy because she gives me presents or this or that. I try to be as present with my children as possible. We all have our phones. We all, I'm not saying I'm never on my phone, but when we do have our time, I want to be on the floor with them playing games.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I'm not just going to buy them all these games. And that's what they care about. And they care about just the routine, the memories, the dinners, the little things. It doesn't have to be all day, every day. I know everyone's working and everyone's juggling a million things.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But if you even only have 30 minutes with your kids, make sure to put your phone down for the 30 minutes because your kids will remember that. And that 30 minutes, you can build such a connection. And me and my kids, we talk and we, they take baths together, both of them.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And that's our time and how loving both my kids are with each other that I take such pride in because I always hear stories about, you know, and I don't think I was that nice to my brother when I was little, but I just want them to know that this is a house of love. And like, for me, love is the foundation. Love and faith is the foundation for everything.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But the representation that we had when we were younger was very different than what the 40s are or 50s now. I mean, Gabrielle Union, I don't exactly know how old everybody is, but Jennifer Lopez, you see all of these gorgeous women and you're like, wait, I think they're 40s, 50s, what am I afraid of?
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I took a picture of it this morning.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I was shocked. Like, what a deep thing to say.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
We went to a restaurant the other night and the waitress kept calling me by my name. She was like, Chloe, do you want another drink? Whatever. And True was going, how does she know who you are? And I go, oh, I just come here all the time, which I don't. But... they don't realize that we're on TV or anything. Like they don't know the difference. Cause I'm not talking about it.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I just think that's, that's impressive. I think that's so funny to me that she's like, how does somebody know your name? Or she'll say, why do they want a picture with you? I go, maybe she likes my hair. Like I always try to say like something and brush it off. I don't know. I don't want to make a big deal out of it. You know, for my kids, true. She has an iPad and,
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
that they can watch shows or whatever when doing her hair, but I have limited iPad time. And I tell her she can't have a phone until she's 12. And who knows if I'll keep that, but that's, I don't think kids need it. Other than that, I think they have these amazing phones that are just for calling. Now I forget what they're called, but there's no internet access.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And so I'm like, yes, if you, you know, you could have one of those phones, but just to call me, but otherwise why I don't want you.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
looking at these things they're not on the internet like she's not on instagram or tiktok or that kind of stuff i don't think that's necessary at this age i think it's really damaging but i try to not be on those things when i'm around them like we'll film videos and i post them later but we just think we're making like dance videos but i try not to be on those things around them because they see that yeah i picked up the phone when we were at a red light and true was like mommy
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
no texting and driving. And I was like, oh my gosh, she's right. I was at a red light, but they will also remind you if you're doing anything illegal, they love to yell at you. But I don't know what the world looks like for that. I'm not someone that covers their faces and does all that. I feel like I don't want to not be out with my kids or feel like I have to hide them.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I feel like that would make my kids more anxious or ask more questions. If my kids ever wanted to do something on TV or anything like that, we would talk it through. But I don't push it. I don't necessarily want them to. But if they want to, then we can talk about it.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And it's not so much even about the aesthetic, it's the liveliness that these women and the passion that these women have for life that you're like, that doesn't seem so bad.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I don't know if I'm the best one to ask because I genuinely, I have young, my kids are younger. And so I am loving that I get to have so much time with them right now. And there's going to be a time that no matter how much they love me, they're not going to want to be with me. They're like, I want to be with my friends. And yes, that's going to hurt, but I get it. I was that kid.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And right now I'm... truly happy and I don't feel lonely. I've like, I'm so fulfilled with work and my kids. And once they're asleep, like I get a little bit of alone time and then I go to sleep and I start again.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
What I do love is that now I am forced to take my time with someone where before I I would love a good love bombing. I'm like, you left me okay. Like, and I would just like roll with it where now I think we could, you know, mildly love bomb, but I can't do much about it because I do love the love and the affirmations. I do love all that.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I'm not going to deny it, but I have to move slow because of my children. And that is a good thing for me. I am so used to my routine right now. I'm such a structured person. I don't do a lot of socializing unless it's with my same group of people.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And someone said to me, why don't you throw like an event at your... Not an event, but like I host a dinner at my house once a month and have your friends invite another friend. And not even about for romantic reasons, but just for the fact because dating is a skill or even socializing. Like my social battery is... empty all the time because I'm not used to using it anymore.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
If it's not in the daytime, I'm like, you want me up past nine? That's crazy. Like to me, I'm like, how do you stay awake? I have to get used to staying up a little later, entertaining people, hanging out. So I loved that idea of like maybe once a month having A little dinner party with my friends. If it's a group of people, I don't mind if they are around my kids because it's a group.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And just meeting people. It could be romantic if someone brought someone that I was like, okay, I like this person. Or it could just be me sharpening the tool of socializing with people again.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Totally. Because that was me. I have been alone for three years and I love it. Like I'm scared. And I'm like, okay, I have to, I love this maybe too much where that worries me. Cause I could do this for another five years and be so happy about it, but that's not normal. Like I need to push myself.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And for people that, if you don't want to bring people to your home, you guys could like do this at a restaurant and have it be a monthly thing or every other month thing, like whatever's workable for your schedule. I just loved that lesson and I can't do it weekly. Like I would love to in my brain, but that's too much social battery for me.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
So I'm like, I could do once a month where I just have a little gathering at my house and it is a skill that I want to work on.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
You might be invited to one.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Yeah, no, my wheels are turning right now. I don't know. I mean, I sound like a broken record, but so much of it is my faith.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And, but also it's beautiful, but it is, but I was raised in such a faith heavy household. My mom and my dad were Faith is the foundation of everything. And my dad, we went to Sunday school every Sunday. Everything was always about faith. Prayers every night, prayers before food. And I think when you're just raised that way, you learn to rely and lean on your faith whenever you need to.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I'm someone that it's so easy to rely on faith when you're struggling and when something's bad. But yes, I go to God when I'm struggling, but I go to God so much more when I'm happy because I am so grateful and I'm telling him, thank you for bringing me out of that spot.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I think so many people forget to go to your higher power when you're in the best of times because that's when he wants you to acknowledge him too. Not just when you need him. That's easy. Don't just call me for help. Like, I want you to call me too when you're joyful and there's so much greatness going on. And so I do the same.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But you put these kids in college and they're supposed to, what is your major? What is your minor? And then if you go arrive from that when you graduate, it's like, then what did I pay for? But how many times have you changed your mind about something in life? Right. And so have I. So yes, I believe in college. I believe in that if that's the right step for you.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I think the more that you talk about greatness, the more greatness then surrounds you.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
It's sad. I was watching the Academy Awards the other night and I barely heard anybody thank God. And at the end, Adrian Brody, he was, I think, one of the last speeches. And the very first thing he said was, I just want to thank God. And I don't know. That just made, I was like, it was sad to me that not that many people lead with faith anymore.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And not that you have to, but it was a big thing that I noticed.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Well, thank you, Jay. It's so easy to talk to you and I love and adore you and being in this safe space. So thank you for allowing me to be vulnerable and feel so safe with you.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But I also think it's people need to know how okay it is to not necessarily know what you want to do when you're
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
You don't know when you also have that arrogance in your 20s that no one can tell you anything. But people have to go through that. I get it. And I also get now when adults were like, they sort of roll their eyes at somebody in their 20s. And it's rare that most people in that age are so definitive at what they want to do. And if they are, great.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And that is just this old soul-ness in them, I would say. But also, I've only been in my 40s for a few months. It's crazy how quickly that you're sort of like, you feel so solid in who you are or the things that maybe made you insecure or doubt yourself, you sort of just let it go. And I don't know what that switch exactly is.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I just know that it's that grounding term that you said, you feel so solid within yourself and you're like, it's okay. And I know life is gonna work out. I know everything is gonna come. how I envision it because I have that drive and desire to, but I've stopped limiting myself to it had to be done before I turned 40.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
When I was younger, society definitely put on me, or not just me, I think a lot of people, but now life expectancy is longer. I think we prioritize our health from within so much more. And people realize, okay, it's not all about just having babies and getting married by the time you're 23 and then just coasting the rest or figuring it out.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Now it's like, let's figure out what we really want at our core. And then the rest will sort of unfold. Yeah.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Number one, it's something I had to learn myself is comparison is the thief of joy. It takes everything out of anything that you're doing. If you're constantly comparing what you're doing to somebody else, because somebody else is only showing you their highlight reel anyway. We have to remember that
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
What we're doing is probably someone's looking at us and they're like, damn, that's an amazing highlight reel. I want that. But we're so conditioned now to constantly want more and more and never be satisfied. That makes me sad for my kids. And I always try. I have so many nieces and nephews. And three of them are the exact same age. It's my daughter and Kylie's daughter and Kim's daughter.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
Black holes could be a consequence of the way that we understand the universe.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And sometimes that's challenging because they each want the same thing all the time. And I sort of like that because I like to say like, not just because someone has that doesn't mean you get to have that. And those are smaller lessons, but you learn that later in life so much bigger.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And you can be inspired by others or motivated by others, but the jealousy or the comparison is something that we or I have had to even retrain my brain to not always look at someone and be like, well, why don't I have that? Or how can I get, like it should be more from a motivational way as opposed to an envious way.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But I also think, do you want to be married and have kids because that's what you were taught as a kid that you're supposed to do? Do you want that and a career? And which one do you want to have come first? And do you not want a career? And do you just want to be a mother? Whatever the answer is, is all okay because it's your life.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
But sometimes I think that we live a life so much for other people and we forget to check in with ourselves. And it's okay if you had a desire in your 20s and now you're in your 30s. You're like, wait, I actually don't want that anymore. And I changed my direction. And it's okay to admit that to yourself.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And I think I get a very interesting take on that because I do that with me and my sisters. And so when I look at all of my siblings, I know so in-depthly also their struggles and how many companies we've all started that have failed, where so many people that you look up to, you don't hear every little thing until they're at the top.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
And then they're telling you, this was how they got here, their success story. And sometimes you're like, okay, but... You're here now and it still seems unobtainable. But for me, I do get... I'm very lucky for my positioning because even though I see my siblings and I see all their success now, I remember how much stuff we...
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
tried to do and you know throw spaghetti on the wall and it just didn't stick but I don't know if outsiders would see that looking within our family all the time I think if you can you know go back and google back 2008 whatever you'll be like oh they did that and where's that company and so everyone has their failures but I wouldn't even call them failures what's the biggest lesson you're taking into your 40s something that you've been carrying with you into this time
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
Khloé Kardashian: My Side that Nobody Knows (Truth Behind Headlines, Divorce, Co-Parenting)
I talk to myself a lot. So I like to be really intentional. And I understand and I teach my daughter that happiness and positivity and all of that is a choice. And so what I like to is be very intentional with my days, my jobs, the things that I choose to do and spend time on. And not in a like smug sort of way.