Kat Timpf

I think every religion's different. I think there's some people who are really socially conservative religious that are opposed to IVF in general because embryos are discarded or they die and that kind of a thing. Right.

I think every religion's different. I think there's some people who are really socially conservative religious that are opposed to IVF in general because embryos are discarded or they die and that kind of a thing. Right.

Probably not for me.

Probably not for me.

I was like, we're on yoga? I haven't heard of that.

I was like, we're on yoga? I haven't heard of that.

His dad's having a tough day.

His dad's having a tough day.

Right.

Right.

Oh.

Oh.

So, like, it's a bad, I mean, I'm not, I don't know if that's obvious to you. Stretching? That I'm not Catholic. I know, but exactly, yeah. Stretching is the devil? But there's something, I don't know. Can you do stretching for Jesus? Yeah.

So, like, it's a bad, I mean, I'm not, I don't know if that's obvious to you. Stretching? That I'm not Catholic. I know, but exactly, yeah. Stretching is the devil? But there's something, I don't know. Can you do stretching for Jesus? Yeah.

Will you read Bible verses? Yeah, I don't know.

Will you read Bible verses? Yeah, I don't know.

I am not Catholic. I'm not religious at all anymore, which is why I think that I'm always looking for things. I'm always looking for a way to be religious or in some sense spiritual. I've never done ayahuasca. I really want to do ayahuasca. I've done other things that have been beneficial to me, but I'm searching for that thing. I'm searching for that.

I am not Catholic. I'm not religious at all anymore, which is why I think that I'm always looking for things. I'm always looking for a way to be religious or in some sense spiritual. I've never done ayahuasca. I really want to do ayahuasca. I've done other things that have been beneficial to me, but I'm searching for that thing. I'm searching for that.

I want to believe in something greater than myself. I think that's normal for people.

I want to believe in something greater than myself. I think that's normal for people.

I'm not that. I'm just agnostic. I'm kind of like, who am I to say what there is and isn't?

I'm not that. I'm just agnostic. I'm kind of like, who am I to say what there is and isn't?

Yeah. And in my dumb ass, I just talk about it all.

Yeah. And in my dumb ass, I just talk about it all.

Well, thank you. I get to be into trouble sometimes, but it's much less stressful than the alternative of having to worry about things being uncovered that I've been hiding from people. I mean, a lot of times those are the creepiest people. Oh, for sure. The people that are, everything's great, everything's perfect. It's like for sure.

Well, thank you. I get to be into trouble sometimes, but it's much less stressful than the alternative of having to worry about things being uncovered that I've been hiding from people. I mean, a lot of times those are the creepiest people. Oh, for sure. The people that are, everything's great, everything's perfect. It's like for sure.

Yeah, the craziest, and this is the most normal thing to do is get pregnant, but it's the craziest trip I've ever had. It has to be. All I did was have sex. I didn't pick up a license, and now there's going to be a baby in my apartment.

Yeah, the craziest, and this is the most normal thing to do is get pregnant, but it's the craziest trip I've ever had. It has to be. All I did was have sex. I didn't pick up a license, and now there's going to be a baby in my apartment.

That's what's going to be crazy. This is going to be a human that's going to have opinions, and it's going to tell me no. They're going to be mad at you. Yeah, I'm going to be like, I didn't smoke any fucking cigs. I smoked no cigs, and now you're trying to tell me no? I'm going to be like, I should have smoked a pack a day with your ass talking to me like that.

That's what's going to be crazy. This is going to be a human that's going to have opinions, and it's going to tell me no. They're going to be mad at you. Yeah, I'm going to be like, I didn't smoke any fucking cigs. I smoked no cigs, and now you're trying to tell me no? I'm going to be like, I should have smoked a pack a day with your ass talking to me like that.

Yeah, exactly. They're going to find. Why did you make me?

Yeah, exactly. They're going to find. Why did you make me?

It's your fault. No matter what, the kid's going to find a way to hate you. Right. Like that's going to find and find a way. I don't I don't know. But it's it's the craziest. It's the craziest trip. And I think it's also that's part of this. I'm always like looking for I'm just like looking for meaning. I want there to be something so badly.

It's your fault. No matter what, the kid's going to find a way to hate you. Right. Like that's going to find and find a way. I don't I don't know. But it's it's the craziest. It's the craziest trip. And I think it's also that's part of this. I'm always like looking for I'm just like looking for meaning. I want there to be something so badly.

And that's and I think that we all do.

And that's and I think that we all do.

Well, I think that's why people like psychedelics. I think that's why, I mean, it definitely can make you view the world in a different way.

Well, I think that's why people like psychedelics. I think that's why, I mean, it definitely can make you view the world in a different way.

And then compared to all the other drugs, I mean, the worst drug I ever did was Accutane. It made me want to kill myself. This was last summer. I mean, I actually was suicidal. I went off of it.

And then compared to all the other drugs, I mean, the worst drug I ever did was Accutane. It made me want to kill myself. This was last summer. I mean, I actually was suicidal. I went off of it.

The way more dangerous drug for me than shrooms, Accutane.

The way more dangerous drug for me than shrooms, Accutane.

Me too. My brain, I finally decided I was crying on the bathroom floor because I was going to die and everyone I know is going to die. And again, always been true. Always been true. My husband found me on the bathroom floor. And I stopped taking it about a month before it worked out of my system. And then I went back to normal. But at that time, I was like, I've lost myself.

Me too. My brain, I finally decided I was crying on the bathroom floor because I was going to die and everyone I know is going to die. And again, always been true. Always been true. My husband found me on the bathroom floor. And I stopped taking it about a month before it worked out of my system. And then I went back to normal. But at that time, I was like, I've lost myself.

I'm never going to be myself again.

I'm never going to be myself again.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I experienced that I experienced my brain being hijacked in a bad way by a drug for for zits I was like I'll just and and I was you know you can't drink on it so I was like I was having these extreme reactions stone cold sober but I was on the show sometimes and I would be so depressed and people would be email I'm getting emails like you're like acting like a bitch or you're this and that and it's like no no you know I want to kill myself I don't think I'm too good for people I want to kill myself and it's just scary it was very scary

I experienced that I experienced my brain being hijacked in a bad way by a drug for for zits I was like I'll just and and I was you know you can't drink on it so I was like I was having these extreme reactions stone cold sober but I was on the show sometimes and I would be so depressed and people would be email I'm getting emails like you're like acting like a bitch or you're this and that and it's like no no you know I want to kill myself I don't think I'm too good for people I want to kill myself and it's just scary it was very scary

Well, I'm glad you got off it. Yes. That one I'm never doing again.

Well, I'm glad you got off it. Yes. That one I'm never doing again.

I really enjoyed talking to you, too. It was really fun.

I really enjoyed talking to you, too. It was really fun.

Yeah, thank you.

Yeah, thank you.

Do you have a copy of it here? I have it outside. I left all my shit outside. No worries. It's called I Used to Like You Until. It's called I Used to Like You Until. And it is all about how one single thing should not be enough to write another person off. It's about independent thinking. It's about connection. And I spill a lot of tea on myself in the book. So the point, I'm naked on the cover.

Do you have a copy of it here? I have it outside. I left all my shit outside. No worries. It's called I Used to Like You Until. It's called I Used to Like You Until. And it is all about how one single thing should not be enough to write another person off. It's about independent thinking. It's about connection. And I spill a lot of tea on myself in the book. So the point, I'm naked on the cover.

My body looks nothing like this anymore. But covered in hate mail with the idea of vulnerability in the face of overwhelming hatred. That's great. So I, you know, I had the idea of. And you read it, too. I did read the audio book. Fantastic. Thank you.

My body looks nothing like this anymore. But covered in hate mail with the idea of vulnerability in the face of overwhelming hatred. That's great. So I, you know, I had the idea of. And you read it, too. I did read the audio book. Fantastic. Thank you.

Yeah. You have to. I have a very distinctive voice.

Yeah. You have to. I have a very distinctive voice.

I'm talking about a lot of very personal things in the book.

I'm talking about a lot of very personal things in the book.

No.

No.

Don't worry, that's not in the book.

Don't worry, that's not in the book.

Thank you for having me. It was a lot of fun. Me too. I agree.

Thank you for having me. It was a lot of fun. Me too. I agree.

Yeah. Yeah. There was a concern about that. Right. Where if I don't again, this is there was a concern about I don't know if it was ever really a thing, but it was a concern about it happening potentially where if abortion was illegal, they could get data from these these apps that track your period. Right.

Yeah. Yeah. There was a concern about that. Right. Where if I don't again, this is there was a concern about I don't know if it was ever really a thing, but it was a concern about it happening potentially where if abortion was illegal, they could get data from these these apps that track your period. Right.

And I have one because it now tracks my it tells me like your baby's the size of a pomegranate this week. And I'm like, oh, that's so cute. Right. But if let's say I it was telling me all that and I like miss my period, then it could be watching me to see if I was obtaining an abortion pill online or something like that. Right. If my period was.

And I have one because it now tracks my it tells me like your baby's the size of a pomegranate this week. And I'm like, oh, that's so cute. Right. But if let's say I it was telling me all that and I like miss my period, then it could be watching me to see if I was obtaining an abortion pill online or something like that. Right. If my period was.

Exactly.

Exactly.

The app read wrong. The app saw that you missed your period.

The app read wrong. The app saw that you missed your period.

Yeah. Well, we have no privacy. And it's one of the scariest, biggest issues for me. It's a giant issue. It's just how many things between banks and the government be able to look at. They were never supposed to be able to look at all the things that they're looking at.

Yeah. Well, we have no privacy. And it's one of the scariest, biggest issues for me. It's a giant issue. It's just how many things between banks and the government be able to look at. They were never supposed to be able to look at all the things that they're looking at.

And that's why people have to be concerned about it.

And that's why people have to be concerned about it.

Mm-hmm. That's my nightmare, is having my private text messages.

Mm-hmm. That's my nightmare, is having my private text messages.

That's my nightmare. I mean, the things I text to people, every time that happens, when people's texts get public, I'm more horrified that the texts get public than most of whatever's in the messages. It's such an invasion. It's such a violation.

That's my nightmare. I mean, the things I text to people, every time that happens, when people's texts get public, I'm more horrified that the texts get public than most of whatever's in the messages. It's such an invasion. It's such a violation.

Exactly.

Exactly.

Sometimes you're just doing a bit.

Sometimes you're just doing a bit.

Exactly. A lot of times you're just doing a bit. It's something between friends. And if you could see so many of my group chats, if you could see with comedians, with people, you could see what we're saying. I mean, it'd be horrible. It'd be over for me. I'd have to start a new life under a new name. But why?

Exactly. A lot of times you're just doing a bit. It's something between friends. And if you could see so many of my group chats, if you could see with comedians, with people, you could see what we're saying. I mean, it'd be horrible. It'd be over for me. I'd have to start a new life under a new name. But why?

It is stupid. But I think more people think it's stupid, but fewer people will admit they think it's stupid because they're worried about it.

It is stupid. But I think more people think it's stupid, but fewer people will admit they think it's stupid because they're worried about it.

I think it's people who, I mean, I'm always more interested in examining that. There's this thing now where it's people are trying to cancel people over things that they said or tweeted or posted when they were 13 years old. Well, I can help you with that. It's real simple. But they've never reached their potential that they thought they would reach.

I think it's people who, I mean, I'm always more interested in examining that. There's this thing now where it's people are trying to cancel people over things that they said or tweeted or posted when they were 13 years old. Well, I can help you with that. It's real simple. But they've never reached their potential that they thought they would reach.

50% of men are not having sex.

50% of men are not having sex.

Maybe. I dated a Call of Duty guy once. It's a little triggering for me. And I was in my early 20s. I'm like young and beautiful and sitting there. And then he's like on his video. And I married a man who fought in an actual war. So that was much better for me. I'm like, that's good.

Maybe. I dated a Call of Duty guy once. It's a little triggering for me. And I was in my early 20s. I'm like young and beautiful and sitting there. And then he's like on his video. And I married a man who fought in an actual war. So that was much better for me. I'm like, that's good.

Yeah, exactly. I would hate my husband if he didn't go to war, actually, because he was he's, you know, like a good man from a good family who was, you know, had a good upbringing and went to boarding school. And I'm like, if he didn't have any the trauma of the war, I wouldn't like him. That's funny.

Yeah, exactly. I would hate my husband if he didn't go to war, actually, because he was he's, you know, like a good man from a good family who was, you know, had a good upbringing and went to boarding school. And I'm like, if he didn't have any the trauma of the war, I wouldn't like him. That's funny.

And then there's good.

And then there's good.

Those are the people that are in my Instagram. Like, we feel bad for your husband. You're disgusting. Yeah. Oh, I mean, it's funny. It's come across it sometimes, but I don't.

Those are the people that are in my Instagram. Like, we feel bad for your husband. You're disgusting. Yeah. Oh, I mean, it's funny. It's come across it sometimes, but I don't.

Yeah. It's better not to.

Yeah. It's better not to.

You know, the good stuff you never, you're like, okay.

You know, the good stuff you never, you're like, okay.

But sometimes I get, you know, emails that they make me laugh. I mean, sometimes I see things that make me laugh.

But sometimes I get, you know, emails that they make me laugh. I mean, sometimes I see things that make me laugh.

Yeah, no, I hear you.

Yeah, no, I hear you.

It would be so much easier for me to just be all in.

It would be so much easier for me to just be all in.

Well, I would, I mean, I do well, right? I sell out shows. I'd sell out all the shows and faster. If you were all MAGA? I would sell more books. I mean, the platform that I'm on every single night, the people who are watching are MAGA people. And so if I were, you know, if money was the thing I was the most after, I would be an idiot. Maybe I am an idiot. I don't think you would. I can't do it.

Well, I would, I mean, I do well, right? I sell out shows. I'd sell out all the shows and faster. If you were all MAGA? I would sell more books. I mean, the platform that I'm on every single night, the people who are watching are MAGA people. And so if I were, you know, if money was the thing I was the most after, I would be an idiot. Maybe I am an idiot. I don't think you would. I can't do it.

I can't do it.

I can't do it.

Exactly. I can't do it.

Exactly. I can't do it.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right. Yeah. Yeah. I just couldn't do I just I couldn't. I mean, again, if you actually are super MAGA and you love Trump and you're one of those people, then good for you. I have no judgment of that. That's fine. Live your life. Have fun. But can you please be OK with the fact that I'm not the way that I'm OK with you?

Right. Yeah. Yeah. I just couldn't do I just I couldn't. I mean, again, if you actually are super MAGA and you love Trump and you're one of those people, then good for you. I have no judgment of that. That's fine. Live your life. Have fun. But can you please be OK with the fact that I'm not the way that I'm OK with you?

No, I didn't. What happened? It's crazy. What happened?

No, I didn't. What happened? It's crazy. What happened?

What happened?

What happened?

Yeah.

Yeah.

It's not surprising. And of course, the Kamala is completely just an idea that's been manufactured. It's been amazing. It's been so insane to watch. I mean, the Joe Biden thing, I think, is a perfect example.

It's not surprising. And of course, the Kamala is completely just an idea that's been manufactured. It's been amazing. It's been so insane to watch. I mean, the Joe Biden thing, I think, is a perfect example.

The fact that that went on for so long is a perfect example of the how the the you know, the part is the hyper partisanship allows things to happen because Joe was very clearly not OK for a while.

The fact that that went on for so long is a perfect example of the how the the you know, the part is the hyper partisanship allows things to happen because Joe was very clearly not OK for a while.

I mean, anybody who was watching that and just seeing it, if that's your grandpa, if that were my grandpa, my grandpa's almost 90, so he's got like 10 years on the guy, I'd be like, Papa, we need to go to the hospital. You're not okay. But that became a Republican thing to say. So people weren't saying it until they couldn't possibly hide it anymore. Right.

I mean, anybody who was watching that and just seeing it, if that's your grandpa, if that were my grandpa, my grandpa's almost 90, so he's got like 10 years on the guy, I'd be like, Papa, we need to go to the hospital. You're not okay. But that became a Republican thing to say. So people weren't saying it until they couldn't possibly hide it anymore. Right.

So I think that's a perfect example of how partisanship leads to some really stupid shit. But I was actually shocked they threw her in there. And just right before that, people were saying worst vice president ever. Obviously, you know, not popular now. Now she's you know, she's brat. Like that's Charlie XCX is trying to make it cool. It's like she's a DA. She locked people up for cocaine.

So I think that's a perfect example of how partisanship leads to some really stupid shit. But I was actually shocked they threw her in there. And just right before that, people were saying worst vice president ever. Obviously, you know, not popular now. Now she's you know, she's brat. Like that's Charlie XCX is trying to make it cool. It's like she's a DA. She locked people up for cocaine.

She's not for weed. She's not brat. It's just been so crazy to watch. People are so excited and they don't even know what they're excited about.

She's not for weed. She's not brat. It's just been so crazy to watch. People are so excited and they don't even know what they're excited about.

Of course.

Of course.

Yeah. yeah and people get really mad people get mad at me for working at I mean even in my personal life for working at Fox News people are like how could you work I'm like what do you mean

Yeah. yeah and people get really mad people get mad at me for working at I mean even in my personal life for working at Fox News people are like how could you work I'm like what do you mean

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

18 minutes of nothing. Yeah, I want to see the rest.

18 minutes of nothing. Yeah, I want to see the rest.

Yeah, it's exactly what it's like. And I still have no idea. She could win.

Yeah, it's exactly what it's like. And I still have no idea. She could win.

Yeah.

Yeah.

It was nothing that she did. She hadn't even spoken at all for several days. And people are like, Kamala, Kamala. I mean, the cover of the Time magazine without an interview is crazy. I mean, I'm so jealous. I can't. After I give birth, I'm going to just have my husband bring me a pack of Zins. Immediately. Nicotine's the best for writing, for working, for everything.

It was nothing that she did. She hadn't even spoken at all for several days. And people are like, Kamala, Kamala. I mean, the cover of the Time magazine without an interview is crazy. I mean, I'm so jealous. I can't. After I give birth, I'm going to just have my husband bring me a pack of Zins. Immediately. Nicotine's the best for writing, for working, for everything.

problematic? I had a problem with vaping for a while. It was bad. I'd be in public with multiple vapes and I was like, Kat, you can't. You can't be doing that.

problematic? I had a problem with vaping for a while. It was bad. I'd be in public with multiple vapes and I was like, Kat, you can't. You can't be doing that.

They're so addictive. I was one of the first vapers. I quit for... I'm serious. I quit.

They're so addictive. I was one of the first vapers. I quit for... I'm serious. I quit.

I did. Lunchboxes. I had a laboratory in my house. He was like, I was seeing all my liquids.

I did. Lunchboxes. I had a laboratory in my house. He was like, I was seeing all my liquids.

It just rips harder. I used to love to blow fat clouds. I had to get a dental procedure done, something super minor, whatever. I couldn't vape for 24 hours. I put so many nicotine patches on my body and I still didn't even feel anything. It should have killed me or at least made me throw up. And I was like, ugh. And then I still kept vaping.

It just rips harder. I used to love to blow fat clouds. I had to get a dental procedure done, something super minor, whatever. I couldn't vape for 24 hours. I put so many nicotine patches on my body and I still didn't even feel anything. It should have killed me or at least made me throw up. And I was like, ugh. And then I still kept vaping.

I eventually, when I quit vaping and I was using pouches to help me quit vaping, And I was using 12 milligram pouches. I try those. I can't do it.

I eventually, when I quit vaping and I was using pouches to help me quit vaping, And I was using 12 milligram pouches. I try those. I can't do it.

I have to put them away.

I have to put them away.

Most decent people, which is why I'm saying I had a problem and I quit. Now I got down to six and now zero, obviously, because of this baby.

Most decent people, which is why I'm saying I had a problem and I quit. Now I got down to six and now zero, obviously, because of this baby.

Yeah, I can't wait. I want to get six. I can't wait. I'm going to be in that hospital bed. I'm going to be like... Like, I can't wait. But you can't because it'll get in the milk. That's what I... Can you pump and dump, right?

Yeah, I can't wait. I want to get six. I can't wait. I'm going to be in that hospital bed. I'm going to be like... Like, I can't wait. But you can't because it'll get in the milk. That's what I... Can you pump and dump, right?

Okay, I'm gonna try to breastfeed, okay? Oh, you should definitely breastfeed. I know I should, but it's like I've already had nine months of no nicotine. That's the thing that's the hardest for me.

Okay, I'm gonna try to breastfeed, okay? Oh, you should definitely breastfeed. I know I should, but it's like I've already had nine months of no nicotine. That's the thing that's the hardest for me.

No, I think about nicotine every day. Like every day.

No, I think about nicotine every day. Like every day.

In college I smoked when I drank and in college I drank a lot because I was in college.

In college I smoked when I drank and in college I drank a lot because I was in college.

Vaping comes along probably so when I was like mid-twenties and I did it for eight years.

Vaping comes along probably so when I was like mid-twenties and I did it for eight years.

I started with the blue cigs and then they just weren't hitting hard enough for me anymore. I was ripping multiple blue cigs and then I love the jewel. I love I mean, so there's these things in Detroit called breezes. I don't know if you can get them other places, but I know you can get them, and I'm from the Detroit area.

I started with the blue cigs and then they just weren't hitting hard enough for me anymore. I was ripping multiple blue cigs and then I love the jewel. I love I mean, so there's these things in Detroit called breezes. I don't know if you can get them other places, but I know you can get them, and I'm from the Detroit area.

And I was having, I don't know, this is illegal, so I probably shouldn't say this, but my brother may have been sending shipments in to me, you know, when they were illegal in New York, because the breezes were the best. Why were they illegal in New York?

And I was having, I don't know, this is illegal, so I probably shouldn't say this, but my brother may have been sending shipments in to me, you know, when they were illegal in New York, because the breezes were the best. Why were they illegal in New York?

For a while, well, they weren't sold in New York, but for a while there was supposed to be, the jewels, rather, the jewels were illegal in New York. And then we weren't sure about what was going to be legal in New York. Do you remember that, when they made jewel pods illegal?

For a while, well, they weren't sold in New York, but for a while there was supposed to be, the jewels, rather, the jewels were illegal in New York. And then we weren't sure about what was going to be legal in New York. Do you remember that, when they made jewel pods illegal?

And that was my shit. The mango jewel. When you get a fresh one and it makes that crackling sound. And honestly, if I found a mango jewel pod somewhere in my house, I would have. I don't know. Not when I'm pregnant. That's the thing that sucks is like, I love this baby so much that I've not even met yet. That's wonderful. Nothing. It's like so real commitment.

And that was my shit. The mango jewel. When you get a fresh one and it makes that crackling sound. And honestly, if I found a mango jewel pod somewhere in my house, I would have. I don't know. Not when I'm pregnant. That's the thing that sucks is like, I love this baby so much that I've not even met yet. That's wonderful. Nothing. It's like so real commitment.

I know, but it's so weird for my brand to love this. I never thought I'd have kids. I never thought I never wanted to. And then I now I'm like, my baby's the size of a cucumber.

I know, but it's so weird for my brand to love this. I never thought I'd have kids. I never thought I never wanted to. And then I now I'm like, my baby's the size of a cucumber.

Of course.

Of course.

Of course. But I'm going to go back.

Of course. But I'm going to go back.

I'm a better, both my books I wrote on nicotine. I had nicotine gum in my, I just want to like have something in my jaw.

I'm a better, both my books I wrote on nicotine. I had nicotine gum in my, I just want to like have something in my jaw.

Like premature birth, I think.

Like premature birth, I think.

Really bad stuff. Oh, bad ones. Really bad ones.

Really bad stuff. Oh, bad ones. Really bad ones.

I think nicotine. I mean, I'm really limited. I mean, I can't, it's like, you can't really do stimulants when you're pregnant. You can't do anything when you're pregnant. I can have 200 milligrams of caffeine a day.

I think nicotine. I mean, I'm really limited. I mean, I can't, it's like, you can't really do stimulants when you're pregnant. You can't do anything when you're pregnant. I can have 200 milligrams of caffeine a day.

See, I don't know. Cause I've always done them together.

See, I don't know. Cause I've always done them together.

I had to go cold turkey. Wow. Yeah. So what was that like? I was a bitch. For how long? A couple weeks. It was really rough. Wow.

I had to go cold turkey. Wow. Yeah. So what was that like? I was a bitch. For how long? A couple weeks. It was really rough. Wow.

Yeah. Well, I had a doctor tell me that I probably couldn't get pregnant without medication. That if I took medication, I would have a 10% chance of getting pregnant. Naturally, as they say. The sex way. I was just living my life. And then I didn't feel good. And then I took a test and I was like, here we go. And we wanted kids. We were planning on starting IVF.

Yeah. Well, I had a doctor tell me that I probably couldn't get pregnant without medication. That if I took medication, I would have a 10% chance of getting pregnant. Naturally, as they say. The sex way. I was just living my life. And then I didn't feel good. And then I took a test and I was like, here we go. And we wanted kids. We were planning on starting IVF.

And so I just quit everything cold turkey at once.

And so I just quit everything cold turkey at once.

I would go to the gym, and I'd come back, and I'd put a nicotine pouch in. I mean, I really like nicotine a lot.

I would go to the gym, and I'd come back, and I'd put a nicotine pouch in. I mean, I really like nicotine a lot.

I used to be vaping on airplanes, which is... Oh, my God.

I used to be vaping on airplanes, which is... Oh, my God.

It's so illegal.

It's so illegal.

I would bring a blanket with me on the plane, and I would sit underneath it like a psycho. Thank you. Like a psycho. But they're like, you know, what are they going to do? They can't be like, ma'am, you're not allowed to be under a blanket. I mean, I looked like a mentally ill, like, Pete, they're probably watching me.

I would bring a blanket with me on the plane, and I would sit underneath it like a psycho. Thank you. Like a psycho. But they're like, you know, what are they going to do? They can't be like, ma'am, you're not allowed to be under a blanket. I mean, I looked like a mentally ill, like, Pete, they're probably watching me.

Oh, no, no, because I would also hold it in as long as I could to get the biggest rush. I would hold my breath. I'm telling you, this was bad. I've never seen anybody as bad on it as I was, which is why I can never try crack because my life would be over in three days. I would love crack.

Oh, no, no, because I would also hold it in as long as I could to get the biggest rush. I would hold my breath. I'm telling you, this was bad. I've never seen anybody as bad on it as I was, which is why I can never try crack because my life would be over in three days. I would love crack.

Yeah, they do.

Yeah, they do.

I mean, I couldn't handle the nicotine vapes. So crack, probably not. But again, yeah. So when did you move to robots? I moved to robots after the Juul became illegal. And I couldn't get the mango. So I was trying to get the same rip I could get off of Juul.

I mean, I couldn't handle the nicotine vapes. So crack, probably not. But again, yeah. So when did you move to robots? I moved to robots after the Juul became illegal. And I couldn't get the mango. So I was trying to get the same rip I could get off of Juul.

I always mix that. And it was like stick. And they would explode and be sticky everywhere. And sometimes it would explode in your mouth. And you get that like...

I always mix that. And it was like stick. And they would explode and be sticky everywhere. And sometimes it would explode in your mouth. And you get that like...

I would have loved that job. I would leave my life behind. It moves you. You mean I can just rip vapes all day?

I would have loved that job. I would leave my life behind. It moves you. You mean I can just rip vapes all day?

Yeah.

Yeah.

I was doing that job for free.

I was doing that job for free.

That's the thing is I mainly felt like if I get lung cancer, I will feel stupid. You know, I'll be like, how could I possibly have thought I could get away with doing all this and not have something bad happen?

That's the thing is I mainly felt like if I get lung cancer, I will feel stupid. You know, I'll be like, how could I possibly have thought I could get away with doing all this and not have something bad happen?

Nice to meet you. Great to meet you, too.

Nice to meet you. Great to meet you, too.

I know. I know who he is.

I know. I know who he is.

Of course. Yeah, of course I'm here, right? Of course I'm going to do this.

Of course. Yeah, of course I'm here, right? Of course I'm going to do this.

Yeah, I was. Well, I mean, I believe there's a lot of studies that show it is way better than cigarettes. But it's also the way that I've used cigarettes. I can still, when I go to Europe, again, not when I'm pregnant, but I can still go to Europe and smoke cigarettes only in Europe and come back and not smoke cigarettes. And there's immediate downsides to cigarettes. You got to go outside.

Yeah, I was. Well, I mean, I believe there's a lot of studies that show it is way better than cigarettes. But it's also the way that I've used cigarettes. I can still, when I go to Europe, again, not when I'm pregnant, but I can still go to Europe and smoke cigarettes only in Europe and come back and not smoke cigarettes. And there's immediate downsides to cigarettes. You got to go outside.

You smell bad. I was smoking the vape, hitting the vape when I was in the hospital. I had a near-death experience in 2020. Do you know about my shit? I had a shit bag. No. What happened? I know you're jacked, but you're not squeamish, right? No. Okay. So I had a bowel perforation. I had really bad stomach pains.

You smell bad. I was smoking the vape, hitting the vape when I was in the hospital. I had a near-death experience in 2020. Do you know about my shit? I had a shit bag. No. What happened? I know you're jacked, but you're not squeamish, right? No. Okay. So I had a bowel perforation. I had really bad stomach pains.

And I went to the hospital, and they told me I needed an ileostomy, which is a shit bag. They take your small intestine, they pull it out of your stomach, and you have a bag. So I had to have that surgery in November of 2020. And I was in the hospital, and I was ripping the vape for sure. Oh, my God. I have my intestine hanging out of my body, and I'm ripping a vape.

And I went to the hospital, and they told me I needed an ileostomy, which is a shit bag. They take your small intestine, they pull it out of your stomach, and you have a bag. So I had to have that surgery in November of 2020. And I was in the hospital, and I was ripping the vape for sure. Oh, my God. I have my intestine hanging out of my body, and I'm ripping a vape.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I had it for about five weeks, and I didn't tell anybody. I wrote about it in my first book, and that's how everybody kind of found out that that had happened to me. And it was bad. It was really, really rough.

I had it for about five weeks, and I didn't tell anybody. I wrote about it in my first book, and that's how everybody kind of found out that that had happened to me. And it was bad. It was really, really rough.

and then i got it reversed that's good i got it reversed but i had complications oh that's not so i had complications where i was gushing blood on my ass there's a loose staple and i needed a transfusion guess which day that was that i had that bad thing happen what day january 6th oh my god like that january the january 6th oh my god and i didn't talk publicly about this for a long time so whenever i was on the news like people would ask me it comes up a lot

and then i got it reversed that's good i got it reversed but i had complications oh that's not so i had complications where i was gushing blood on my ass there's a loose staple and i needed a transfusion guess which day that was that i had that bad thing happen what day january 6th oh my god like that january the january 6th oh my god and i didn't talk publicly about this for a long time so whenever i was on the news like people would ask me it comes up a lot

And, like, I'd be thinking about... You. Yes. Yeah, you almost died. You're bleeding out of your butt. Literally, I will never forget this. I've never talked about this before, actually, this specific thing. I will never forget this. On January 6th, I'm all doped up, right? If you have stuff like that, they'll let you have a Dilaudid drip. I'm, like, all doped up. Whee!

And, like, I'd be thinking about... You. Yes. Yeah, you almost died. You're bleeding out of your butt. Literally, I will never forget this. I've never talked about this before, actually, this specific thing. I will never forget this. On January 6th, I'm all doped up, right? If you have stuff like that, they'll let you have a Dilaudid drip. I'm, like, all doped up. Whee!

Yeah, I Used to Like You Until.

Yeah, I Used to Like You Until.

Yeah, I tweeted or I posted on Facebook, tweeted, whatever, posted something along the lines of... This is actually my personal Facebook. It's shared, too. And it was like, the news is stressful, turning on a Ted Bundy documentary to relax, something like that.

Yeah, I tweeted or I posted on Facebook, tweeted, whatever, posted something along the lines of... This is actually my personal Facebook. It's shared, too. And it was like, the news is stressful, turning on a Ted Bundy documentary to relax, something like that.

And I looked at my personal Facebook and some dude who I knew from doing open mics in Baltimore had commented like, oh, are you stressed out about, you know, basically that like that you did this, you know, because I work at Fox that I did. And I'm sitting there on a bucket. in a hospital with blood gushing out of my ass.

And I looked at my personal Facebook and some dude who I knew from doing open mics in Baltimore had commented like, oh, are you stressed out about, you know, basically that like that you did this, you know, because I work at Fox that I did. And I'm sitting there on a bucket. in a hospital with blood gushing out of my ass.

And this dude that I did open mics with eight years ago is trying to tell me that he's having a bad day.

And this dude that I did open mics with eight years ago is trying to tell me that he's having a bad day.

Right, which again, I was in the hospital having, you know, I would say I had a worse January 6th than a lot of people.

Right, which again, I was in the hospital having, you know, I would say I had a worse January 6th than a lot of people.

I mean, it's not a hot take that everything's so divided now, right? I think a lot of people have noticed that. But I think I'm really in this unique position where I kind of get it from both sides because I'm independent politically. I just want very small government, which I think puts me at odds with both parties sometimes, depending on what the issue is. So...

I mean, it's not a hot take that everything's so divided now, right? I think a lot of people have noticed that. But I think I'm really in this unique position where I kind of get it from both sides because I'm independent politically. I just want very small government, which I think puts me at odds with both parties sometimes, depending on what the issue is. So...

Right? I mean, I'm just reading that.

Right? I mean, I'm just reading that.

The worst, yes. Absolutely. Absolutely.

The worst, yes. Absolutely. Absolutely.

Some dude, exactly.

Some dude, exactly.

I did.

I did.

from this bucket where literally the most humbling probably moment of my life where I was like I am a fragile fragile human being right there's some crazy lady next to me too she was some lady she was like 90 years old and you know she thought that they want to give her potassium supplements so she was talking out loud about how they're trying to poison her with something I had her comment because we were all watching the January 6th it was on in the hospital

from this bucket where literally the most humbling probably moment of my life where I was like I am a fragile fragile human being right there's some crazy lady next to me too she was some lady she was like 90 years old and you know she thought that they want to give her potassium supplements so she was talking out loud about how they're trying to poison her with something I had her comment because we were all watching the January 6th it was on in the hospital

we were all kind of watching it together and she was like well everybody loved trump at first and now they don't and she was like everybody those are all russians at the capitol and i was like and i'm sitting there on my bucket like a foot away from this woman and i'm like like i'm like she's talking to me asking her questions i was i would have given up on any idea of a real conversation there's not this is not a real conversation you're not talking with this woman no you can't get frustrated those aren't russians

we were all kind of watching it together and she was like well everybody loved trump at first and now they don't and she was like everybody those are all russians at the capitol and i was like and i'm sitting there on my bucket like a foot away from this woman and i'm like like i'm like she's talking to me asking her questions i was i would have given up on any idea of a real conversation there's not this is not a real conversation you're not talking with this woman no you can't get frustrated those aren't russians

She was really old.

She was really old.

Yeah, the hospital was a bad... I mean, it's always a bad... It's like a bad hang. It's horrible.

Yeah, the hospital was a bad... I mean, it's always a bad... It's like a bad hang. It's horrible.

well i had the when i was in the hospital for my first surgery there was this lady who was like she was farting really loud and then she was singing she was like giving glory to god for her farts that she was oh boy so i was turning up my forensic files as loud as i could just like cranking it up and she asked me if i could turn it down and i already had this is the day of my first i'd already been having like the worst day of my life so i was like how the fuck could you ask me to but then we wound up talking all night like and i have her number on my phone still because

well i had the when i was in the hospital for my first surgery there was this lady who was like she was farting really loud and then she was singing she was like giving glory to god for her farts that she was oh boy so i was turning up my forensic files as loud as i could just like cranking it up and she asked me if i could turn it down and i already had this is the day of my first i'd already been having like the worst day of my life so i was like how the fuck could you ask me to but then we wound up talking all night like and i have her number on my phone still because

Because when you're in a hospital and I was by myself because this was during COVID and in New York, my husband was allowed. He could come visit for I could have two visitors a day, maximum two people for maximum two hours and not past 6 p.m. So I was scared. I had this near death experience and then complications on the reversal. I was alone the entire time.

Because when you're in a hospital and I was by myself because this was during COVID and in New York, my husband was allowed. He could come visit for I could have two visitors a day, maximum two people for maximum two hours and not past 6 p.m. So I was scared. I had this near death experience and then complications on the reversal. I was alone the entire time.

And you need, I mean, and again, I'm lucky because I lived through it, right? There's people who died, obviously. It was just so horrible and scary to do that by myself. And also, hospitals, you need an advocate. Because I was so doped up. They weren't like, my sheets weren't being washed as much as they should have been. I couldn't do, you know, it's just like you need someone.

And you need, I mean, and again, I'm lucky because I lived through it, right? There's people who died, obviously. It was just so horrible and scary to do that by myself. And also, hospitals, you need an advocate. Because I was so doped up. They weren't like, my sheets weren't being washed as much as they should have been. I couldn't do, you know, it's just like you need someone.

Somebody needs to look out for you. Hey, she needs, you know, she's, hey. Yeah. Yeah.

Somebody needs to look out for you. Hey, she needs, you know, she's, hey. Yeah. Yeah.

I will sometimes get shit from the I'm on Fox News. So I'll get sometimes shit from the viewers for sometimes more of this more social issues or I'm not religious, that kind of a thing. But then the people on the left, a lot of them won't even want to have a conversation with me. So like, oh, she works at Fox News. That tells me everything I need to know about. Yeah.

I will sometimes get shit from the I'm on Fox News. So I'll get sometimes shit from the viewers for sometimes more of this more social issues or I'm not religious, that kind of a thing. But then the people on the left, a lot of them won't even want to have a conversation with me. So like, oh, she works at Fox News. That tells me everything I need to know about. Yeah.

I had my insides hanging out of my body.

I had my insides hanging out of my body.

But again, you're already letting him in. Does it get worse in the night that he can't stay past 6 p.m.? Because also he had work, but he still obviously came to see me every day. But he couldn't come for very long, and he had to leave. And I was there by myself, and it was so scary. And there was no benefit to it. It was just because of COVID.

But again, you're already letting him in. Does it get worse in the night that he can't stay past 6 p.m.? Because also he had work, but he still obviously came to see me every day. But he couldn't come for very long, and he had to leave. And I was there by myself, and it was so scary. And there was no benefit to it. It was just because of COVID.

But that doesn't make sense because if he had COVID, it'd already be in there. Two fucking hours. From the two hours he was in there.

But that doesn't make sense because if he had COVID, it'd already be in there. Two fucking hours. From the two hours he was in there.

Yeah. Yeah. That's so stupid. They told me, I will never forget that. When I woke up from the first surgery, they came in and they told me that they had good news and that I tested negative for COVID. Oh my God. I was like, I don't fucking care. My small intestine is hanging out of my stomach.

Yeah. Yeah. That's so stupid. They told me, I will never forget that. When I woke up from the first surgery, they came in and they told me that they had good news and that I tested negative for COVID. Oh my God. I was like, I don't fucking care. My small intestine is hanging out of my stomach.

No, they don't.

No, they don't.

No.

No.

I tested myself. I had it in July. And I tested myself only because I'm pregnant. And I wanted to know what to expect. And I got really sick because my immune system is trash. Again, because of this baby. No nicotine. Can't fight off illnesses.

I tested myself. I had it in July. And I tested myself only because I'm pregnant. And I wanted to know what to expect. And I got really sick because my immune system is trash. Again, because of this baby. No nicotine. Can't fight off illnesses.

I'm doing just prenatals, probiotics. That's it. Prenatals? Yeah. What is that? A company sells prenatal vitamins? A company sells prenatal vitamins.

I'm doing just prenatals, probiotics. That's it. Prenatals? Yeah. What is that? A company sells prenatal vitamins? A company sells prenatal vitamins.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I eat food now a lot more than I used to. I used to be chewing nicotine gum all day. It doesn't make you hungry. It doesn't make you hungry.

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I eat food now a lot more than I used to. I used to be chewing nicotine gum all day. It doesn't make you hungry. It doesn't make you hungry.

I know, and it's the weirdest thing. I can only imagine. I mean, again, I didn't used to be someone who ate. I eat all day now. I mean, I eat food at night. I used to not eat all day. You were on speed. Of course. Of course. But I was also nicotine gum all day. I always nicotine gum.

I know, and it's the weirdest thing. I can only imagine. I mean, again, I didn't used to be someone who ate. I eat all day now. I mean, I eat food at night. I used to not eat all day. You were on speed. Of course. Of course. But I was also nicotine gum all day. I always nicotine gum.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And I think that that's doing some real damage overall to us as a country by the fact that we're letting – because I'm not special in that aspect, right? People will let one aspect of a person completely just – that's all I need to know about that person. I'm not going to talk to that person.

And I think that that's doing some real damage overall to us as a country by the fact that we're letting – because I'm not special in that aspect, right? People will let one aspect of a person completely just – that's all I need to know about that person. I'm not going to talk to that person.

So I was, yes. But I was honestly so used to the amphetamines. So I was on Vyvanse, which is slow release. Adderall, I don't like. I was on Adderall briefly, and it was too much for me. I was jittery. I was anxious. I was, no, I won't do Adderall. And the Vyvanse is slow release. It doesn't make me feel... So when I first went off of it, yes, I ate... I gained like 10 pounds in six weeks, right?

So I was, yes. But I was honestly so used to the amphetamines. So I was on Vyvanse, which is slow release. Adderall, I don't like. I was on Adderall briefly, and it was too much for me. I was jittery. I was anxious. I was, no, I won't do Adderall. And the Vyvanse is slow release. It doesn't make me feel... So when I first went off of it, yes, I ate... I gained like 10 pounds in six weeks, right?

But now I feel like I'm just as hungry as I was... when I was on Adderall without the nicotine. Because I got so used to it. So I wasn't ever really getting this like, which Adderall I did get that from.

But now I feel like I'm just as hungry as I was... when I was on Adderall without the nicotine. Because I got so used to it. So I wasn't ever really getting this like, which Adderall I did get that from.

Like your skull. And I didn't like that. I didn't like it.

Like your skull. And I didn't like that. I didn't like it.

So I did it because my insurance didn't cover Vyvanse back when I lived in D.C. So I was like, I need something, right?

So I did it because my insurance didn't cover Vyvanse back when I lived in D.C. So I was like, I need something, right?

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm not doing that. Certainly not. Only doctors. My drug dealers are all actual doctors. I was like, okay, I'll do Adderall. How much different can it be? And it was bad. And if I ever forgot to take it, I was walking in a wall. I couldn't. I was sleeping. I couldn't do it. Wow. I couldn't do it. So then I just found coupons somewhere. My doctor helped me up.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm not doing that. Certainly not. Only doctors. My drug dealers are all actual doctors. I was like, okay, I'll do Adderall. How much different can it be? And it was bad. And if I ever forgot to take it, I was walking in a wall. I couldn't. I was sleeping. I couldn't do it. Wow. I couldn't do it. So then I just found coupons somewhere. My doctor helped me up.

I was like, I will sacrifice in other areas to afford the Vyvanse because I don't know how people take this. Adderall, I couldn't do.

I was like, I will sacrifice in other areas to afford the Vyvanse because I don't know how people take this. Adderall, I couldn't do.

A couple months. A couple months? Yeah.

A couple months. A couple months? Yeah.

Probably 30.

Probably 30.

I've taken Metadate. I've taken, again, I was... I'm one of those... When they say, like, study the kids who were put on Ritalin when they were five, you're looking at one. Like, this is me. I mean, I was on... And it's, you know, it is harder. It is really a lot harder for me to live and do basic shit. But it's been interesting.

I've taken Metadate. I've taken, again, I was... I'm one of those... When they say, like, study the kids who were put on Ritalin when they were five, you're looking at one. Like, this is me. I mean, I was on... And it's, you know, it is harder. It is really a lot harder for me to live and do basic shit. But it's been interesting.

Yeah.

Yeah.

See, I didn't feel like that. You didn't feel like that? Except the Adderall. I can't. That's not for me. Adderall's not for me. I won't do Adderall.

See, I didn't feel like that. You didn't feel like that? Except the Adderall. I can't. That's not for me. Adderall's not for me. I won't do Adderall.

Oh, if I take Adderall, I thought I forgot. I remember I forgot my Vyvanse one time and I took someone's Adderall like this was a few years ago. And immediately I'm texting everyone on my phone like, am I going to be okay? Tell me I'm okay.

Oh, if I take Adderall, I thought I forgot. I remember I forgot my Vyvanse one time and I took someone's Adderall like this was a few years ago. And immediately I'm texting everyone on my phone like, am I going to be okay? Tell me I'm okay.

That's not I like I I'm Exhausting enough to be around as a person just naturally. I don't need I don't need to add her all adding to the problem You know, I felt like I've the world's collapsing around me.

That's not I like I I'm Exhausting enough to be around as a person just naturally. I don't need I don't need to add her all adding to the problem You know, I felt like I've the world's collapsing around me.

Yeah. I mean, I was one of the first and I think I will. I think I will go back. But then I'm like, maybe I should try just nicotine. But a doctor probably wouldn't recommend that. But what do they know?

Yeah. I mean, I was one of the first and I think I will. I think I will go back. But then I'm like, maybe I should try just nicotine. But a doctor probably wouldn't recommend that. But what do they know?

Right. I'm a better person because of nicotine. And I know that's not popular. That's not for the kids. They're listening. But I don't know. Whenever I'm writing, sometimes I'll be like, I need to get a sentence perfect.

Right. I'm a better person because of nicotine. And I know that's not popular. That's not for the kids. They're listening. But I don't know. Whenever I'm writing, sometimes I'll be like, I need to get a sentence perfect.

when i'm writing i'll spend hours sometimes on a single sentence if i think it's a really important sentence and i'll be like i don't know i don't know and then i'll put a put a zin in or put nicotine and then i will get it have you ever tried other nootropics um yeah i mean i'm just nicotine i mean yes but but have you ever tried the things like um you ever heard of neuro gum you know what neuro no not that we have some over here in that blue bag right there

when i'm writing i'll spend hours sometimes on a single sentence if i think it's a really important sentence and i'll be like i don't know i don't know and then i'll put a put a zin in or put nicotine and then i will get it have you ever tried other nootropics um yeah i mean i'm just nicotine i mean yes but but have you ever tried the things like um you ever heard of neuro gum you know what neuro no not that we have some over here in that blue bag right there

Yeah, I've tried a theanine before.

Yeah, I've tried a theanine before.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I am excited to start to own my body again and be able to take whatever I want.

I am excited to start to own my body again and be able to take whatever I want.

I don't like that. Because I'm anxious enough as it is. I'm actually a very anxious person.

I don't like that. Because I'm anxious enough as it is. I'm actually a very anxious person.

Which is such a wild take. Well, people think that just because you don't think the government's the best way to solve a problem, that doesn't actually mean you don't care about the problem. So if you don't think the government can solve something like, oh, well, you're a piece of shit because you don't care about this or this. It's like, no, I just don't think the government's going to solve it.

Which is such a wild take. Well, people think that just because you don't think the government's the best way to solve a problem, that doesn't actually mean you don't care about the problem. So if you don't think the government can solve something like, oh, well, you're a piece of shit because you don't care about this or this. It's like, no, I just don't think the government's going to solve it.

Okay.

Okay.

I actually never thought I could go off of it. Like, I actually... That was one of my concerns in terms of actually getting pregnant. That you were going to be like that for the rest of your life. When I went off of it, I mean... I was like, I'm in it now, baby.

I actually never thought I could go off of it. Like, I actually... That was one of my concerns in terms of actually getting pregnant. That you were going to be like that for the rest of your life. When I went off of it, I mean... I was like, I'm in it now, baby.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right.

Right.

I do. That's kind of crazy that that's an option. Because I could have walked out of here no matter what and be like, I'd have been so much better if I would have been. That's so crazy. Maybe you wouldn't. Maybe we wouldn't connect as well. I don't know because it's so weird because I feel like I'm getting to meet myself.

I do. That's kind of crazy that that's an option. Because I could have walked out of here no matter what and be like, I'd have been so much better if I would have been. That's so crazy. Maybe you wouldn't. Maybe we wouldn't connect as well. I don't know because it's so weird because I feel like I'm getting to meet myself.

But also it's not really myself because of the pregnancy because this is pregnant me. But then I kind of am curious to stay off of it a little longer when I'm not pregnant just to see.

But also it's not really myself because of the pregnancy because this is pregnant me. But then I kind of am curious to stay off of it a little longer when I'm not pregnant just to see.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So you're my primary care physician now.

So you're my primary care physician now.

Oh, yeah. Coke is... I have no interest in cocaine.

Oh, yeah. Coke is... I have no interest in cocaine.

Oh, I've definitely considered that. I've definitely considered that. For me, it was just that there was I had I didn't function off of it. So I didn't try.

Oh, I've definitely considered that. I've definitely considered that. For me, it was just that there was I had I didn't function off of it. So I didn't try.

I was on pro vigil briefly, but I was I forget why I went on pro vigil instead of everything else. But it was oh, I was diagnosed briefly. I've never talked about this with narcolepsy, but I don't think I really have it. Did you fall asleep? I fell asleep a lot in the sleep study, but this was also in college. And I smoked a lot of weed in college.

I was on pro vigil briefly, but I was I forget why I went on pro vigil instead of everything else. But it was oh, I was diagnosed briefly. I've never talked about this with narcolepsy, but I don't think I really have it. Did you fall asleep? I fell asleep a lot in the sleep study, but this was also in college. And I smoked a lot of weed in college.

So I really think I might have just been like had a stone over.

So I really think I might have just been like had a stone over.

And they said, you got normal epilepsy, take some pills. i've never i've never talked about this and i've actually kind of just remembered it but yeah and i couldn't stay awake for the sleep studies they were like she's got narcolepsy no one was ever like hey are you taking bong reps why are you so sleepy cat oh my god which i think that must have been why looking back

And they said, you got normal epilepsy, take some pills. i've never i've never talked about this and i've actually kind of just remembered it but yeah and i couldn't stay awake for the sleep studies they were like she's got narcolepsy no one was ever like hey are you taking bong reps why are you so sleepy cat oh my god which i think that must have been why looking back

The fact that I was taking that many bong rips. And again, I graduated at the top of my class. I was very studious. At college, I smoked a lot of weed. Yeah, you were probably sleepy. I was sleepy. That's so crazy. I might have smoked the afternoon before.

The fact that I was taking that many bong rips. And again, I graduated at the top of my class. I was very studious. At college, I smoked a lot of weed. Yeah, you were probably sleepy. I was sleepy. That's so crazy. I might have smoked the afternoon before.

Here, take a pill. I would have told them the truth. Nobody ever asked me.

Here, take a pill. I would have told them the truth. Nobody ever asked me.

Yeah, I get that.

Yeah, I get that.

And then I took it, and then I stopped taking it, and I went back to, I think, Metadate, which is another stimulant. Wow.

And then I took it, and then I stopped taking it, and I went back to, I think, Metadate, which is another stimulant. Wow.

No, it wasn't.

No, it wasn't.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right.

Right.

Anymore. I miss it.

Anymore. I miss it.

No, it's... No, it's because I haven't in 10 years, so I'm not sure I remember how. My husband is like, you need to learn. You know what I make this poor man do, or I have made him do the past five years? So I have a cat that is, he's now 14 years old. He is a dick. He's got a lot of health issues, but I won't let him die. I won't let him die because he's my best friend, blah, blah, blah. Right.

No, it's... No, it's because I haven't in 10 years, so I'm not sure I remember how. My husband is like, you need to learn. You know what I make this poor man do, or I have made him do the past five years? So I have a cat that is, he's now 14 years old. He is a dick. He's got a lot of health issues, but I won't let him die. I won't let him die because he's my best friend, blah, blah, blah. Right.

But we can't find anyone to watch him. We can't board him at the vet over Christmas. So since I met my husband, going on six years now, I've made him drive me and the cat home to my father's house. Where's your father's house? Detroit area.

But we can't find anyone to watch him. We can't board him at the vet over Christmas. So since I met my husband, going on six years now, I've made him drive me and the cat home to my father's house. Where's your father's house? Detroit area.

With the cat. How far is it in the car? It's like 12 hours with the cat. Oh, my God. So it's like you drive all that time. And when you get there, you're in Detroit. Oh, my God. So a lot of people are like, he's the lucky guy. And it's like, no, he's not. He's a saint.

With the cat. How far is it in the car? It's like 12 hours with the cat. Oh, my God. So it's like you drive all that time. And when you get there, you're in Detroit. Oh, my God. So a lot of people are like, he's the lucky guy. And it's like, no, he's not. He's a saint.

He is happy. It's fine.

He is happy. It's fine.

For a cat. That's not even a nice cat. Like, he bites. That's a problem. He needs daily medication.

For a cat. That's not even a nice cat. Like, he bites. That's a problem. He needs daily medication.

This, that. Sorry. You did just make a very reasonable suggestion. For a normal cat, but this cat will like, he is feral. Was he an actual feral cat? Yeah. So I was dating my college boyfriend living out in LA and I was like, I moved in with him non-consensually. That's a whole nother story. I got into Columbia, couldn't afford it.

This, that. Sorry. You did just make a very reasonable suggestion. For a normal cat, but this cat will like, he is feral. Was he an actual feral cat? Yeah. So I was dating my college boyfriend living out in LA and I was like, I moved in with him non-consensually. That's a whole nother story. I got into Columbia, couldn't afford it.

So I decided to stay in LA and keep interning, waiting tables, doing comedy. And we were fighting a lot because we shouldn't have been together. Yeah. So he got me. He's a great friend of mine now, actually. But he brought me this cat as like a bandaid on the relationship that he just found in North Hollywood, basically. Oh, wow. That was like dying and sick. And this has been like my.

So I decided to stay in LA and keep interning, waiting tables, doing comedy. And we were fighting a lot because we shouldn't have been together. Yeah. So he got me. He's a great friend of mine now, actually. But he brought me this cat as like a bandaid on the relationship that he just found in North Hollywood, basically. Oh, wow. That was like dying and sick. And this has been like my.

Yeah. But there's no there's like you said, there's no actual incentive for them to do that. New York's the same. I mean, I live in New York because I love my job. But if I didn't have my job, I would not live there because it's so expensive. Right. And I was in L.A. last week and I was coming back from JFK in the morning after a red eye. I am exhausted. I'm pregnant.

Yeah. But there's no there's like you said, there's no actual incentive for them to do that. New York's the same. I mean, I live in New York because I love my job. But if I didn't have my job, I would not live there because it's so expensive. Right. And I was in L.A. last week and I was coming back from JFK in the morning after a red eye. I am exhausted. I'm pregnant.

When my husband and I went on our honeymoon, I hired a vet to stay at the house.

When my husband and I went on our honeymoon, I hired a vet to stay at the house.

And my sister, I had her stay there too because he likes my sister. But he likes, he finally likes my husband now. And it took what, like five years? That's crazy. But like, he's like, I'm driving. He's like, every year he's like, I'm driving. Because every year I'm like, this will be the last year. Probably. Yeah.

And my sister, I had her stay there too because he likes my sister. But he likes, he finally likes my husband now. And it took what, like five years? That's crazy. But like, he's like, I'm driving. He's like, every year he's like, I'm driving. Because every year I'm like, this will be the last year. Probably. Yeah.

But this cat has had serious health problems for years. Four years requiring multiple daily medications that I have to administer. Because not just anybody can come stay with the cat because they have to administer the medication, which is a hazardous activity for the average person.

But this cat has had serious health problems for years. Four years requiring multiple daily medications that I have to administer. Because not just anybody can come stay with the cat because they have to administer the medication, which is a hazardous activity for the average person.

Because you have to do the syringe in the mouth. Oh, fuck. So I hold him. He'll let me do it. Oh, my God. That's so crazy. I won't, as I said, I won't let him, like, I won't. Why don't you just let him go? He's probably miserable. Because he's stable on the medication. He's happy to see me when I'm home. Like, he misses me. So, like, he's.

Because you have to do the syringe in the mouth. Oh, fuck. So I hold him. He'll let me do it. Oh, my God. That's so crazy. I won't, as I said, I won't let him, like, I won't. Why don't you just let him go? He's probably miserable. Because he's stable on the medication. He's happy to see me when I'm home. Like, he misses me. So, like, he's.

I get it. Now, talk to me a bit. The thing is, if I'm being honest with myself, even if that weren't the answer, I might still have a hard time. Yeah. It's hard. Yeah.

I get it. Now, talk to me a bit. The thing is, if I'm being honest with myself, even if that weren't the answer, I might still have a hard time. Yeah. It's hard. Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Like, Marshall's seven. Yeah.

Like, Marshall's seven. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Well, I mean, when I got this cat, I was a cashier at Boston Market.

Well, I mean, when I got this cat, I was a cashier at Boston Market.

For everything. For everything.

For everything. For everything.

And he sucks. I objectively like...

And he sucks. I objectively like...

No.

No.

Okay, I should watch this. I was really into Jane Goodall as a child.

Okay, I should watch this. I was really into Jane Goodall as a child.

She believes in Bigfoot. She was, I thought it was so cool when I was little how she was like, you know what? I don't want to be part of your society. I'm going to go live among the chimpanzees. I was like, you can do that? Yeah, chip crazy. This lady.

She believes in Bigfoot. She was, I thought it was so cool when I was little how she was like, you know what? I don't want to be part of your society. I'm going to go live among the chimpanzees. I was like, you can do that? Yeah, chip crazy. This lady.

I'm trying to sleep in the car in the roads. I'm just getting pothole after pothole. I'm like going on. I'm like, where are my taxes going exactly? Yeah, because everyone would say these roads, the roads are shit.

I'm trying to sleep in the car in the roads. I'm just getting pothole after pothole. I'm like going on. I'm like, where are my taxes going exactly? Yeah, because everyone would say these roads, the roads are shit.

Like that's a crime of passion. That's not, yeah.

Like that's a crime of passion. That's not, yeah.

Because you didn't bring them a cake. Yeah, you didn't give them a cake. That's fucking wild.

Because you didn't bring them a cake. Yeah, you didn't give them a cake. That's fucking wild.

Yeah. Horrible. I feel like a lot of that was hidden from me as a child. Although when I gave a presentation on Jane Goodall in school, there was like a box set of two VHS tapes. And one was like the happy part. And then like VHS 2 was like, I don't remember what was in it, but it was like something graphic and bad that happened to the chimps. To Jane Goodall? No to the chimps like something.

Yeah. Horrible. I feel like a lot of that was hidden from me as a child. Although when I gave a presentation on Jane Goodall in school, there was like a box set of two VHS tapes. And one was like the happy part. And then like VHS 2 was like, I don't remember what was in it, but it was like something graphic and bad that happened to the chimps. To Jane Goodall? No to the chimps like something.

I don't remember what it was killed them. I don't remember it might have been diseases I don't remember what it was all I remember is that the school called my mom because I brought in the wrong one and I was like I Called your mom.

I don't remember what it was killed them. I don't remember it might have been diseases I don't remember what it was all I remember is that the school called my mom because I brought in the wrong one and I was like I Called your mom.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I was in trouble all the time in school. But how nutty is that thought?

I was in trouble all the time in school. But how nutty is that thought?

I was also, you know, teachers always had it up. I was always in trouble. So it was like, oh, look at her. There's a yearbook where there's a picture of the principal in the yearbook, and I'm in the picture. Because you got in trouble? Because I'm always in trouble.

I was also, you know, teachers always had it up. I was always in trouble. So it was like, oh, look at her. There's a yearbook where there's a picture of the principal in the yearbook, and I'm in the picture. Because you got in trouble? Because I'm always in trouble.

I could never work in a normal office. I never have. I've worked as a waitress and I was a bad one, but sure.

I could never work in a normal office. I never have. I've worked as a waitress and I was a bad one, but sure.

Right? Yeah. And I, I started doing standup cause I needed to do standup. I mean, back when I was in LA and I was, my life was just going to shit. The boyfriend who got me the cat broke up with me. It was shocking. And then I moved into this shitty apartment in a shitty neighborhood. I was still waiting tables, doing comedy. And then I lost. I didn't have enough money for that apartment.

Right? Yeah. And I, I started doing standup cause I needed to do standup. I mean, back when I was in LA and I was, my life was just going to shit. The boyfriend who got me the cat broke up with me. It was shocking. And then I moved into this shitty apartment in a shitty neighborhood. I was still waiting tables, doing comedy. And then I lost. I didn't have enough money for that apartment.

So I had to move in with this bartender I was sort of kind of seeing from my California pizza kitchen job. But not like really. I was like, just because I need to live here doesn't mean we're together. Together it was a mess. Yeah. I had no car. I was like riding the bus. I got scabies from the bus. Like it was it was a bad it was a dark time. Right.

So I had to move in with this bartender I was sort of kind of seeing from my California pizza kitchen job. But not like really. I was like, just because I need to live here doesn't mean we're together. Together it was a mess. Yeah. I had no car. I was like riding the bus. I got scabies from the bus. Like it was it was a bad it was a dark time. Right.

And but I would get on stage and I would talk about it. Right. And that made me feel some sense of power over the things that were making me feel powerless. And I was like, oh, I really like this. I could make fun of this shit and people would be laughing.

And but I would get on stage and I would talk about it. Right. And that made me feel some sense of power over the things that were making me feel powerless. And I was like, oh, I really like this. I could make fun of this shit and people would be laughing.

You know, I would talk about about how broke I was and people would be laughing and I'd be like, oh, I'm created something out of something that I felt it was going to destroy me.

You know, I would talk about about how broke I was and people would be laughing and I'd be like, oh, I'm created something out of something that I felt it was going to destroy me.

Yeah, it really was a mess. But then I kept being gravitated toward that. I mean, even the shitbag thing. So Jim Norton, who I love dearly. As do I. God, he's great. He's the best. He's the best. I did his radio show after the first book came out talking about my shit bag. And he was like, you know, Kat, he's like, as a human being, I'm really sorry that happened to you.

Yeah, it really was a mess. But then I kept being gravitated toward that. I mean, even the shitbag thing. So Jim Norton, who I love dearly. As do I. God, he's great. He's the best. He's the best. I did his radio show after the first book came out talking about my shit bag. And he was like, you know, Kat, he's like, as a human being, I'm really sorry that happened to you.

But as a comedian, I'm jealous. And I do have a lot of material from that, you know, because a lot of people doesn't happen to.

But as a comedian, I'm jealous. And I do have a lot of material from that, you know, because a lot of people doesn't happen to.

And I think it's so much better to have that. People say it's like, oh, it's not like that. It's so much better to have that than to let your trauma define you and try to lord it over other people. Like, you can't say this thing because this thing happened to me. No, that's not.

And I think it's so much better to have that. People say it's like, oh, it's not like that. It's so much better to have that than to let your trauma define you and try to lord it over other people. Like, you can't say this thing because this thing happened to me. No, that's not.

I was a hellion, though. I mean, I got like I didn't want to do math and I started chanting like no more math. I got on the table like I got in trouble for inciting a riot is what they said. And my dad was like, she's six years old. I was a disaster. You were fun. I was fucking fun. That's the thing. I was invited to everybody's birthday, but they wanted me there at least. You know what I mean?

I was a hellion, though. I mean, I got like I didn't want to do math and I started chanting like no more math. I got on the table like I got in trouble for inciting a riot is what they said. And my dad was like, she's six years old. I was a disaster. You were fun. I was fucking fun. That's the thing. I was invited to everybody's birthday, but they wanted me there at least. You know what I mean?

From potholes. Yeah, and it's so expensive. You just hear that bang and you're like, shit. Yeah, it's so expensive. I mean, the fact that I feel very luxurious and it's like a flex to be able to have a child, actually, because we have enough space to put a baby in our rental apartment, which most people don't, actually. I never thought I would get to that position.

From potholes. Yeah, and it's so expensive. You just hear that bang and you're like, shit. Yeah, it's so expensive. I mean, the fact that I feel very luxurious and it's like a flex to be able to have a child, actually, because we have enough space to put a baby in our rental apartment, which most people don't, actually. I never thought I would get to that position.

I'm still fun. I'm a fun person. It's not a bad thing.

I'm still fun. I'm a fun person. It's not a bad thing.

energy but I needed school I was valedictorian in my high school there were 10 of us so it was everybody who had a 4.0 but I needed to do well at school because I knew my parents couldn't afford to send me away to college so I'm kind of like if I wouldn't have been on these drugs what I have been able to do well enough at school because I'm not getting a sports scholarship

energy but I needed school I was valedictorian in my high school there were 10 of us so it was everybody who had a 4.0 but I needed to do well at school because I knew my parents couldn't afford to send me away to college so I'm kind of like if I wouldn't have been on these drugs what I have been able to do well enough at school because I'm not getting a sports scholarship

Or maybe I would have just gone straight to college. I don't know. But I had to study. I had to be good at school in order to have the success that I did, at least academically. But then after I graduated from college where I got a full scholarship, I obviously couldn't afford grad school.

Or maybe I would have just gone straight to college. I don't know. But I had to study. I had to be good at school in order to have the success that I did, at least academically. But then after I graduated from college where I got a full scholarship, I obviously couldn't afford grad school.

I don't know. I feel like I might not have gotten.

I don't know. I feel like I might not have gotten.

We don't know.

We don't know.

Yeah.

Yeah.

You know what's funny is there's people in my real life who have known me for decades who have not had an in-person conversation with me off stimulus. People I've known my whole life who, you know, still. That's crazy. You're meeting me for the first time.

You know what's funny is there's people in my real life who have known me for decades who have not had an in-person conversation with me off stimulus. People I've known my whole life who, you know, still. That's crazy. You're meeting me for the first time.

Yeah, I was worried that I would be.

Yeah, I was worried that I would be.

I never thought I'd even consider not taking them any day or every day. I never thought I would consider that, especially even at the beginning of my pregnancy. But that was also the first trimester, which I was exhausted because I was pregnant. I was like, I can't do anything.

I never thought I'd even consider not taking them any day or every day. I never thought I would consider that, especially even at the beginning of my pregnancy. But that was also the first trimester, which I was exhausted because I was pregnant. I was like, I can't do anything.

So I was off speed and pregnant and off nicotine all at the same time.

So I was off speed and pregnant and off nicotine all at the same time.

Yeah, exactly. That's true. So that's why I was like, I'm still, I don't feel good.

Yeah, exactly. That's true. So that's why I was like, I'm still, I don't feel good.

No, of course not. Don't listen to me. Well, you are my primary care physician. I'm going to write your name down.

No, of course not. Don't listen to me. Well, you are my primary care physician. I'm going to write your name down.

At least to write, I probably will.

At least to write, I probably will.

Yeah. So at least to write, I probably will.

Yeah. So at least to write, I probably will.

I don't know. That's what I'm saying. The fact that I'm even still, I think both, because I'll still have days where I really struggle and I forget things and I lose things. And I'll have this whole plan with my husband. And then I'm like, oh, this shit, this is the wrong day.

I don't know. That's what I'm saying. The fact that I'm even still, I think both, because I'll still have days where I really struggle and I forget things and I lose things. And I'll have this whole plan with my husband. And then I'm like, oh, this shit, this is the wrong day.

This is water, right?

This is water, right?

This is coffee? This is water right here.

This is coffee? This is water right here.

There we go, great, great. See, I can't have coffee. That's too much.

There we go, great, great. See, I can't have coffee. That's too much.

Yeah, I've lived in. When I first moved to New York, I lived in East Harlem. I lived in a truly, actually dangerous neighborhood. I was broken, like just so broke. And it's I don't know how people survive. I really don't. I don't know why. I don't know how I did.

Yeah, I've lived in. When I first moved to New York, I lived in East Harlem. I lived in a truly, actually dangerous neighborhood. I was broken, like just so broke. And it's I don't know how people survive. I really don't. I don't know why. I don't know how I did.

I had like already an Americano today.

I had like already an Americano today.

Well, I've started to think that I at least might not go back to doing it every single day. Because I was doing it every, every, every day, truly, except if I was in the hospital.

Well, I've started to think that I at least might not go back to doing it every single day. Because I was doing it every, every, every day, truly, except if I was in the hospital.

Yeah, it sucks to take speed at the beach. It's not fun to be at the pool.

Yeah, it sucks to take speed at the beach. It's not fun to be at the pool.

Yeah. But I'm going to be like, would I have been better if I was on the pool? Right, but that's crazy talk. Of course, but it's my whole... That's how people stay on heroin. That's my whole life. I was at my first communion on amphetamines.

Yeah. But I'm going to be like, would I have been better if I was on the pool? Right, but that's crazy talk. Of course, but it's my whole... That's how people stay on heroin. That's my whole life. I was at my first communion on amphetamines.

Like, think about all the childhood, you know, events.

Like, think about all the childhood, you know, events.

And I think about nicotine every day. I don't think about the medication every day. So I think I'll definitely go back to nicotine. Maybe I'll use it sometimes. Maybe not every day. I'm definitely not.

And I think about nicotine every day. I don't think about the medication every day. So I think I'll definitely go back to nicotine. Maybe I'll use it sometimes. Maybe not every day. I'm definitely not.

It was great mixing the flavors and all that other shit.

It was great mixing the flavors and all that other shit.

So there is, and this is, I know there's one that's really bad, and that was when kids were getting their lungs exploded or whatever. Well, there's two kids died, right? So, but that, I did research on this.

So there is, and this is, I know there's one that's really bad, and that was when kids were getting their lungs exploded or whatever. Well, there's two kids died, right? So, but that, I did research on this.

I spoke to somebody who, for an article, I wrote an article for National Review about this, who said that she would be surprised if that chemical was in the nicotine vapes at all, because it's pretty much only necessary with THC, and that it was only in like black market THC vapes, basically. That's what I had heard too.

I spoke to somebody who, for an article, I wrote an article for National Review about this, who said that she would be surprised if that chemical was in the nicotine vapes at all, because it's pretty much only necessary with THC, and that it was only in like black market THC vapes, basically. That's what I had heard too.

yeah I had my stupid dream which and it worked out well for me what was your stupid dream I wanted to do exactly what I'm doing now congratulations thank you I mean and then it's of course you achieve something you're like what's the next thing what's the next thing what's the next thing I'm that kind of person but and I'm also it's been so I'm

yeah I had my stupid dream which and it worked out well for me what was your stupid dream I wanted to do exactly what I'm doing now congratulations thank you I mean and then it's of course you achieve something you're like what's the next thing what's the next thing what's the next thing I'm that kind of person but and I'm also it's been so I'm

Yeah, which vaping THC in general is just like, that's not, you never, it's so, that's my most boomer opinion that I have is the weed's too strong. It certainly can be. It's so strong. When people are like, hey, you want to, no, because I don't know what's in that.

Yeah, which vaping THC in general is just like, that's not, you never, it's so, that's my most boomer opinion that I have is the weed's too strong. It certainly can be. It's so strong. When people are like, hey, you want to, no, because I don't know what's in that.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

you're vaping you don't know where the fuck that's coming from no a few years ago I was out with my friend and I hit his weed pen and I couldn't feel my legs I was like I mentally felt not high which is like the opposite I was going I mean I wanted to feel my legs and I wanted to be high and I'm like okay I'm like I don't know what to do I have to leave and I couldn't feel my legs and then I got back to my apartment and then I felt completely fine and I'm like so it was just temporary paralysis yeah

you're vaping you don't know where the fuck that's coming from no a few years ago I was out with my friend and I hit his weed pen and I couldn't feel my legs I was like I mentally felt not high which is like the opposite I was going I mean I wanted to feel my legs and I wanted to be high and I'm like okay I'm like I don't know what to do I have to leave and I couldn't feel my legs and then I got back to my apartment and then I felt completely fine and I'm like so it was just temporary paralysis yeah

And I'm like, I have no idea what was in that. And I've never, ever, ever hit a vape weed pen ever again. And I don't think I will.

And I'm like, I have no idea what was in that. And I've never, ever, ever hit a vape weed pen ever again. And I don't think I will.

I thought you were going to say you don't want to be the person that has to go home.

I thought you were going to say you don't want to be the person that has to go home.

And I have to tell everyone that I smoked a fucking... How'd you lose your legs? You know, there's people in the amputation unit that have been to war or whatever.

And I have to tell everyone that I smoked a fucking... How'd you lose your legs? You know, there's people in the amputation unit that have been to war or whatever.

I ripped a bootleg weed vape pen. I was trying to get high.

I ripped a bootleg weed vape pen. I was trying to get high.

That's what we want.

That's what we want.

I don't know if that's true. What is that?

I don't know if that's true. What is that?

off of amphetamines right now because I'm pregnant for the first time since I was five. Whoa. Isn't that crazy? Whoa. Yeah. What kind of amphetamines? I mean, you name it. I mean, so I was five. I do have ADHD. I was five years old. What does that mean? So, It can be a lot of things, right? It can be lack of focus. It can be emotional dysregulation.

off of amphetamines right now because I'm pregnant for the first time since I was five. Whoa. Isn't that crazy? Whoa. Yeah. What kind of amphetamines? I mean, you name it. I mean, so I was five. I do have ADHD. I was five years old. What does that mean? So, It can be a lot of things, right? It can be lack of focus. It can be emotional dysregulation.

And I love, I mean, listen.

And I love, I mean, listen.

If I found out that, I mean, I don't think it's totally healthy or I would be doing it. I mean, if I found out I was dying, I'd be going to vape immediately.

If I found out that, I mean, I don't think it's totally healthy or I would be doing it. I mean, if I found out I was dying, I'd be going to vape immediately.

Isn't that how you liquefy?

Isn't that how you liquefy?

Ew.

Ew.

But why do you drink that?

But why do you drink that?

Well, of course.

Well, of course.

If there was like benefits, I'd get it. There's no benefits.

If there was like benefits, I'd get it. There's no benefits.

But I feel like also people who say that it's fine, I mean, they're probably really addicted to it, which I get because I've been there. I've been there. It's the best. If I was dying,

But I feel like also people who say that it's fine, I mean, they're probably really addicted to it, which I get because I've been there. I've been there. It's the best. If I was dying,

But for me, a lot of times it's not diagnosed in women until they're older. I was a nuisance. I was unable to function in a classroom setting, which I think is more noticeable if you're a girl. I was acting kind of like a boy, for lack of better. I mean, I was... breaking shit. I was like rough housing. I was unable to function in the classroom. And then we went and got my IQ looked at.

But for me, a lot of times it's not diagnosed in women until they're older. I was a nuisance. I was unable to function in a classroom setting, which I think is more noticeable if you're a girl. I was acting kind of like a boy, for lack of better. I mean, I was... breaking shit. I was like rough housing. I was unable to function in the classroom. And then we went and got my IQ looked at.

Oils.

Oils.

Yeah, you have no idea.

Yeah, you have no idea.

And I actually was a person who trusted doctors more than COVID happened. And it's like, I don't know how you do.

And I actually was a person who trusted doctors more than COVID happened. And it's like, I don't know how you do.

I don't know how you do. I mean, I know it was years. I'm still not over it.

I don't know how you do. I mean, I know it was years. I'm still not over it.

Well, it's safer, but it's safer than smoking. There's no way I'm ripping darts while I'm pregnant. I think that's for people who are going to be ripping. They're like, listen, rather than smoking cigs, have nicotine gum.

Well, it's safer, but it's safer than smoking. There's no way I'm ripping darts while I'm pregnant. I think that's for people who are going to be ripping. They're like, listen, rather than smoking cigs, have nicotine gum.

And my husband, he still vapes. So he still vapes and it's, you know, but I'm like, I'm, you know, I can rub that in his face a little bit that I quit, but definitely.

And my husband, he still vapes. So he still vapes and it's, you know, but I'm like, I'm, you know, I can rub that in his face a little bit that I quit, but definitely.

well sugar is crazy crazy i've gotten into sugar a little bit which sounds insane to say but i never like now that i'm pregnant it's like what dopamine is there available for you not that much so i'll get dessert but i feel like i i got a pumpkin spice frappuccino last weekend okay the smallest one available it's 12 ounces i drank this thing i immediately i was like we have to go home i don't feel good i laid on the couch and i slept for three hours

well sugar is crazy crazy i've gotten into sugar a little bit which sounds insane to say but i never like now that i'm pregnant it's like what dopamine is there available for you not that much so i'll get dessert but i feel like i i got a pumpkin spice frappuccino last weekend okay the smallest one available it's 12 ounces i drank this thing i immediately i was like we have to go home i don't feel good i laid on the couch and i slept for three hours

Right, if you're not used to it. That's a coffee?

Right, if you're not used to it. That's a coffee?

I know. I was so sick, and I've gotten into it. Last night I was at dinner, I was like, should I get dessert? He was like, well, every time you do, and then you're really sick, so maybe.

I know. I was so sick, and I've gotten into it. Last night I was at dinner, I was like, should I get dessert? He was like, well, every time you do, and then you're really sick, so maybe.

Oh, she's really smart. She just can't. So I was on Ritalin since I was five. And now I'm not. Wow. Isn't that crazy?

Oh, she's really smart. She just can't. So I was on Ritalin since I was five. And now I'm not. Wow. Isn't that crazy?

Which I'm sure has no sugar in it.

Which I'm sure has no sugar in it.

And I'm like, where are you going? To the hospital for diabetes. Because I couldn't be going anywhere after having that. So, like, are you drinking this? It's afternoon right now.

And I'm like, where are you going? To the hospital for diabetes. Because I couldn't be going anywhere after having that. So, like, are you drinking this? It's afternoon right now.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Alcoholics. Yes. It's very similar. It's very similar.

Alcoholics. Yes. It's very similar. It's very similar.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I know, and I think it's so interesting with all the things I'm advised to do. They don't really say, like, oh, you shouldn't have a bunch of – I'm sure that's bad. I'm sure it's bad. I'm sure it's terrible to have a bunch of dessert.

I know, and I think it's so interesting with all the things I'm advised to do. They don't really say, like, oh, you shouldn't have a bunch of – I'm sure that's bad. I'm sure it's bad. I'm sure it's terrible to have a bunch of dessert.

Eating healthy food.

Eating healthy food.

No, they don't. They're like, don't have sushi, don't have turkey, don't have – I had him tested for toxoplasmosis. He doesn't have it? He doesn't have it. Oh, that's crazy. Which I was so like... I mean, I thought for sure if he had it, I would have it. Right. Because he sleeps under my chin every night. Oh, yeah. But I actually... We also have a very expensive litter box.

No, they don't. They're like, don't have sushi, don't have turkey, don't have – I had him tested for toxoplasmosis. He doesn't have it? He doesn't have it. Oh, that's crazy. Which I was so like... I mean, I thought for sure if he had it, I would have it. Right. Because he sleeps under my chin every night. Oh, yeah. But I actually... We also have a very expensive litter box.

We have a robot that... One of those? It's called the... No, it's called the Litter Robot. I've seen those. Do you know that it not only self-cleans, it sends data to my phone in real time. So every time he uses the litter box, I get an alert on my phone letting me know how much he weighs... Yeah, because I used to have to weigh him myself to monitor.

We have a robot that... One of those? It's called the... No, it's called the Litter Robot. I've seen those. Do you know that it not only self-cleans, it sends data to my phone in real time. So every time he uses the litter box, I get an alert on my phone letting me know how much he weighs... Yeah, because I used to have to weigh him myself to monitor.

Because basically if he gets overweight, he gets diabetes, he's going down. He has cardiomyopathy, he has, which is a heart thing.

Because basically if he gets overweight, he gets diabetes, he's going down. He has cardiomyopathy, he has, which is a heart thing.

He's so patient. I'm like, I don't know how. He's like, the cat's not even a nice cat. I'm like, I know, but he has herpes too, the cat. Oh, boy. Which I was really good. It's a respiratory thing in cats. Because the first time, I was confused at first too. The vet called me and told me, and I was like, but he's a virgin. And they were like, okay.

He's so patient. I'm like, I don't know how. He's like, the cat's not even a nice cat. I'm like, I know, but he has herpes too, the cat. Oh, boy. Which I was really good. It's a respiratory thing in cats. Because the first time, I was confused at first too. The vet called me and told me, and I was like, but he's a virgin. And they were like, okay.

See, yes, I can. Right. But writing is really hard.

See, yes, I can. Right. But writing is really hard.

It's like they pick it up as kittens, and it causes them to get a cold that comes and goes. Oh, okay. So he takes a medication called Viralis. He takes that one also.

It's like they pick it up as kittens, and it causes them to get a cold that comes and goes. Oh, okay. So he takes a medication called Viralis. He takes that one also.

Every day, mix into his food. He has a probiotic mix into his food.

Every day, mix into his food. He has a probiotic mix into his food.

No, it's not. It's respiratory. He sneezes and coughs. How bad? Enough where it was like on the pillow in the morning, like gross. Oh. Yeah, gross. Gross. I was like, oh, it's just herpes. Get on the pills, you fuckhead. But then he also, he takes steroids every day too.

No, it's not. It's respiratory. He sneezes and coughs. How bad? Enough where it was like on the pillow in the morning, like gross. Oh. Yeah, gross. Gross. I was like, oh, it's just herpes. Get on the pills, you fuckhead. But then he also, he takes steroids every day too.

And a heart medication. Oh, boy. I know. That's a lot. I know. Listen, but I would keep him on. The thing is, if you could do a ventilator, I would. Would you clone him? The thing is, no, because he sucks. You know what I mean?

And a heart medication. Oh, boy. I know. That's a lot. I know. Listen, but I would keep him on. The thing is, if you could do a ventilator, I would. Would you clone him? The thing is, no, because he sucks. You know what I mean?

I don't know.

I don't know.

If he didn't have all the trauma. Yeah.

If he didn't have all the trauma. Yeah.

Right. But I'm a writer. But I've been on amphetamines since I was five. I don't remember a time being off of them. If I haven't been sick or in bed somewhere in the hospital, like really sick, I've been taking one of these drugs. I mean, Vyvanse is what I was most recently taking. So as an ambitious person, it's been tough for me to be pregnant. But I don't know what of it is the pregnancy.

Right. But I'm a writer. But I've been on amphetamines since I was five. I don't remember a time being off of them. If I haven't been sick or in bed somewhere in the hospital, like really sick, I've been taking one of these drugs. I mean, Vyvanse is what I was most recently taking. So as an ambitious person, it's been tough for me to be pregnant. But I don't know what of it is the pregnancy.

It's cute. He'll do that, but then he'll just bite you.

It's cute. He'll do that, but then he'll just bite you.

Maybe. I don't know.

Maybe. I don't know.

Oh, no, not that. I think it'd just be so hard. Because what I love about him is all the shit we went through. Oh, okay. Right. He's part of your history. He was with me through everything. Right. And, you know, from, you know... He's going through all that shit in L.A., and then he lived with me in D.C., which is a horrible place, and then New York and everything. So he's symbolic.

Oh, no, not that. I think it'd just be so hard. Because what I love about him is all the shit we went through. Oh, okay. Right. He's part of your history. He was with me through everything. Right. And, you know, from, you know... He's going through all that shit in L.A., and then he lived with me in D.C., which is a horrible place, and then New York and everything. So he's symbolic.

It's the time in my life. I dedicated my first book to him, him and Joan Rivers. It was him and Joan Rivers, neither of whom can read this.

It's the time in my life. I dedicated my first book to him, him and Joan Rivers. It was him and Joan Rivers, neither of whom can read this.

Yes, plastic surgery. I know.

Yes, plastic surgery. I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

I know.

But it's probably addictive to get all that shit done. I mean, I've not had plastic surgery, but when I get old, I might want to. Like, I might want to get, like, a facelift.

But it's probably addictive to get all that shit done. I mean, I've not had plastic surgery, but when I get old, I might want to. Like, I might want to get, like, a facelift.

I've done that. That I've done.

I've done that. That I've done.