John Rushton
Appearances
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
It should have been this month, November, but we're hoping it will be sort of mid-December.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
There's a story to it. It's a long story, but I won't go into that. But it's a story about people's aspects of people's lives. And it came about from my sort of previous books, which are all about emotions, why people do what they do, or maybe they shouldn't do what they do. This came to some radio programs, which I was on, and people were phoning in about various aspects of their lives.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I think there are three areas. There's the one, the person who's interested in sort of people's lives or social understanding of people. There's the person who likes to travel because you can pick up the book and you can travel and read one chapter or chapter one, then chapter 14, then chapter 73, then chapter 122, and then go back.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
So you can pick and choose from the index and what you wish to read. And then there's the other person who really just wants sort of a more grounding knowledge of a wide specter of the population as to how they think and feel. When you've read a few, I mean, from the people I've shown it to already, they said, well, I never thought of that. Gosh, that's opened my eyes a bit.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I never even realized that people like that would think like that. And there isn't, you know, and why not? Well, it's because a lot of times things don't cross your mind. You're living your life as best you can. And you're not going around being an amateur psychologist to everybody around you in the store, your friends, your family or whatever.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
You have a thing called to live, which is called your own life. And that's the most important thing, because if you're not important to yourself, then nobody else will be. And so it's just those three things. We've even had an interest in a company doing some animation, basically sort of Simpsons style, but not like that.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Having characters and caricatures of the characters involved in various aspects. So there was one in particular, There was an elderly couple, and this is a religious thing, and the husband kept the wife almost locked in at home. He would allow her to go to the store, and she was 45 minutes and any more than that, and he would hit her and everything else. Anyway, this went on.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And one day, she had enough. She just got up, literally with her purse, and left. And she was walking up and down the road outside in a coffee shop. And there was a woman inside. And she said to her friend, do you know, I've seen this woman walking up and down half a dozen times. She just goes there and goes. And of course, the woman didn't know what to do. She didn't know where to go.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
She had no freedom. She didn't know who was who, what's what. And so she went out and asked her and said, are you all right? She said, no, I'm not. She said, I'm lost. She said, where do you live? She said, around the corner. She said, I've never been further than the store. Anyway, they phoned her son, and her son came and took her in, and now she's absolutely enjoying a fabulous life.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And there are lots of stories similar to that where people have just said, enough is enough, and they haven't gone hysterical or going mental. They've just got up and moved.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Yes, that's it. Well, that's what the book contains, a lot of sort of everyday aspects of life, which for some don't go well. And it's not mental health. I mean, both parties are all right, but one has a controlling interest in the other, or some other aspect. And it's that person just saying, I've had enough. I'm going. I don't care why, how, I'm going. And they go.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And it's quite a revelation in what they say and do. And it's quite inspirational, even to myself, that they do that.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Yes, yes, yes. Well, there are quite a few like that in the book in different aspects. And that's one of the reasons why I thought I ought to put this down pen to paper and put some of the transcripts down because they were, I thought they were inspiring. And a lot of these people were not loud or brash or anything, but they just had enough.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I mean, not just, oh, I feel like, not that kind of, but I mean, real problems which they were having to overcome themselves, some with other people, families, friends, whatever. And it came to a level where it was difficult to respond to them all from a personal point of view, because everybody today is waiting to be offended or upset or something like that.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I haven't because my other books were launched and there were no book signings at all. But this one, we are going to. because we have a lot of interested parties, similar to what I've just said to you, who are interested in these aspects and they think it would be very, very good to make it available just for other people to read and think, as you said, wow, that's me. That's me to a T.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Yes, yes. Well, the few people I sent the book to for sort of reading prior to getting it published came back and I was quite actually surprised at what they said. It was quite an emotional thing because some of them resonated with quite a few things in the book. And then they also said on things which they had never thought of before, oh, I never, gosh, I never realized that.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Or it never came to mind.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Well... In my previous life, I was traveling a lot around the world. So I've been to Africa, India, China, South America, Europe, across the states, Canada, New Zealand, Indian Ocean Islands, all of these things. And I was doing that because of my job and I was traveling nonstop. And just what you said was absolutely spot on. Everybody in every country has the same problems.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
It's just that they deal with them differently. In Africa, they have a lot of cultural differences, so they deal with things because of cultural differences. In the Middle East, because of their religious things, they deal with things in a different way. But it's the same problem.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
One thing I mentioned about the lady who actually broke free, it was an Islamic family, and it was a very tight Islamic sort of control of women and men and all that kind of thing. And she didn't, and she couldn't, and all this, these false barriers which are created in your mind. Until that day, she broke them.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
You know, they're accused of people, oh, I'm me next, me next, please offend me, and all that kind of thing. So we came up one evening with some friends and maybe a couple of glasses of wine that we would actually have a fictitious character. And the formulated one, and we called her Auntie Bronwyn. And she had a, we created her character and her background, the pedigree.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And now she's, well, I mean, this is going back a while now, but since she actually broke free and she went to live with her son, you would never recognize her at all. She's a completely new woman. I mean, and she's actually enjoying life.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I've actually got another one in the pipeline, which I've been writing. on a slightly different level, but it's the same basic content. Because I think it's quite cathartic listening to what other people have done, as opposed to having somebody who's a psychiatrist or psychologist telling you this and that and that and that, and you should do this and you should do that.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Because a lot of them are not quite right themselves, to be honest. And so, but getting it firsthand from people who've done it, seen it, got the t-shirt, the car sticker, the cuddly toy, and everything. They've done that from the heart. It's absolutely 100% accurate. And that is where the real inspiration comes, that someone's done it.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And you think, my God, if you can do that, so can I. I'm in a better position than you, but I'm going to do it.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Just based on the book and the people in it, the most important person in the entire world is yourself. If you're not the most important person, are you the second, third, fourth most important person? When you're number one, and you don't have to have riches and grandeur, when you're number one, you can help everybody, including yourself.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
If you're less than that, you're not doing yourself any justice. When you become number one, you're invincible.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
My pleasure indeed. Very much so.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And she was an elderly lady who has been around, done it, seen it, got the t-shirt, the beanie cap, everything. and now she's come home to retire. But she doesn't want to give up life. She's full of life and wisdom, and she likes her gin and tonic late afternoon. So she's everybody's sort of favorite aunt. But she doesn't take any rubbish from anyone.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
She will say exactly what it is, not necessarily being offensive, but she will say exactly what it is and how it should be. She won't tell you what to do, but she'll say, you know, why on earth did you do that? And then when you do that, the person who's actually asking you the question has to explain themselves. And normally the answer comes out why they explain themselves.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And we did this, and it was so interesting that we decided, or I decided,
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
to make a book of the transcripts of all the radio interviews that we'd had and there was some amazing people some quite sort of taboo subjects as well but they went for it you know we would listen and we would get other people's aspects of life as to why it happened how it happened and sometimes it was quite sort of heart-wrenching as to
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
how it happened and why it happened, completely different from a viewpoint where you were saying, what about this? Oh, I don't like that, you know, but have you heard it? No. So you say, well, just listen and then make your judgment. And so this is the book, which is coming out shortly. I think it's 150, 160 chapters.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
So it's 160 different stories of people's lives and how they came about changing their lives themselves.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Maybe I'm just thick-skinned, but I don't know. But... Quickly, I think within the first couple of minutes, you know the kind of person as to what some people just want to air a view about themselves. If you gave them three days airtime, they would be there three days, non-stop, talking about it. Other people just want to talk about an aspect of life which is troubling them.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And usually you find the people who have that minuscule part, that aspect of life, are the ones who are the most interesting.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And that's why we actually developed Auntie Bronwyn, this inanimate person. And we found people would actually talk more in depth to Auntie Bronwyn online. I mean, they couldn't see a caricature. And then when she replied, sometimes making fun of them, I mean, not nastily, but saying, why did you do that? What were you thinking of at the time? Don't you think that sounded a bit stupid?
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And there's a silence. And then sometimes they burst out laughing. Well, it was, but I did it. All of a sudden, you have this warm rapport which comes out. And it's a free, as opposed to me telling you and you telling me and all of this kind of thing. And it's quite sort of elevating.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Yes, I think quite often people have a list of things. It's like going to the doctor and saying, Doctor, I've got something wrong with my finger. And they're winning. Oh, by the way, I have this and a rash here and a spot there and something else. It goes on and on and on. And it's a bit like that at times.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
You find, as you just said, if you just go through the first couple of layers, then the rest seems insignificant. If you actually tell them something to the effect that, well, look, there's one enormous thing in life. which can help you, which will make you overcome all of your problems, which will give you the strength and the courage to go forward. And it's called you.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Go and look in the mirror and see that person and think, wow, I am fantastic. I am brilliant. I'm going to come out over on top of all this. And sometimes it doesn't happen with everybody, but a lot of people, by putting similar things in front of them, They realize that, you know, what they're telling me is all about them, which is quite right. But it is all about them.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
There's no other person there to solve it but themselves. You know, the world isn't a merchant want out there.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I'm quite blunt, or anti-Bronwyn's quite blunt, and saying, you know, because some people come to you telling you really what is wrong with them. And Within that framework, they're also telling you what they want in return. You know, I'm not well, and I want you to do this for me, basically, which, of course, will never happen.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And I'll quite often say, well, what I'm actually picking up from you, and I give you all my sympathy and respect and love and everything else, but I think you need help over and above what I can give you, because it seems you're in such a place where I'm not qualified to go there or understand where you're from. And sometimes... When you said that, they backed down like a million miles.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Well, because what has happened, they've built up... They're going to come on the radio, so they've been on the phone or on the PC or whatever, and they've built up a scenario as an entree in their own mind. It's grown and grown. When I get online, I'm going to tell them... And okay, you're online. And out it comes. And it's just like the damn gates opening.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
You know, it's more than your faucet in your kitchen or your bathroom. It just comes gushing out in millions of gallons. And when you say that and you say, well, I'm sorry, I can't help you. They suddenly back, most of them suddenly back down. And they're quite meek and mild after that. A lot of it's their own fabrication of their own worth and value and their own problems.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And it's almost selfishness like everything. Everything is about me. Of course, you've got to, there's a degree of, it's got to be about you because nobody else can be about you. But it's all always, you know, so much, everything's about me, my friends, my family, the world, everything. Why do they do this to me? How can they do this to me?
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And the answer is quite easily because it's not about you. It's how you react to what is happening when you're not reacting well to anything. This is your own making. And that's sobering.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And sometimes you can hear what they are not saying. And quite often, it's the people who are not saying fully. They're being quite nice about their pain and everything else. They're not screaming and sobbing and...
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
deep breaths and gesticulating and all of this that you can say they're saying it in such a sort of a pleasant way um and i on a number of occasions i've said oh susan or brian or whoever do you know if i was there i would give you the biggest hug ever and then the tears start then it's all gone I said, all right, in your own time, just say bit by bit what it is.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And afterwards, invariably end up with when you say goodbye, that you're laughing to each other on the line.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
The responses are varied. You get some weird people on board anyway. Hey, that's just par for the course. And you get also those people who want to tell you their life story, you know, and you can't get more than 25 pages before it cuts off. And other people will give you two paragraphs or a paragraph. It's quite succinct.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Those are the people who you find you can help the most because they don't waffle. They don't tell you about the weather and when they were going to the store and someone smiled at them and they wondered why. And now they're going to therapy and all this business. The entrepreneur is quite sharp with their answers because there's no good humoring people. because that gets you absolutely nowhere.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I mean, they may not like it, but that's not a problem anyway. So don't like it. Next. For those in between, we had some very, very good responses back saying, well, I took your advice. I didn't want to, but I took your, well, it wasn't, it was we would suggest. We took your suggestions and it's changed immeasurably. It really does work. I do feel better. I feel more in charge of my life.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
And sometimes they're very simple things. But you've got so wrapped up in it, it's become habitual. And it's sort of trying to pull out of the habit.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I think I can honestly say about 10 years ago when I started, people were more wholesome. They were more down to earth, they were more brisk with what they had to say. They had a problem and they told you the problem and that was it. Today, there's so much social engineering picked up from Instagram and Facebook and so many people telling you, have you got this? Have you got that?
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Get this, this will help you do this. Did you fall down and hurt yourself when you were at school? You may be suffering from trauma. I'm 74 years of age. Hello. You know, haven't you got over it yet? It's a bit late now. And all of these kind of things. And they put all, I think, where did you get all this from? Is that true? Or are you just copying and pasting it mentally from somewhere else?
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
I've written a few, actually, but I've got a recent one.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Because there's a lot of copy and paste. You know, they've heard phrases and sayings from the internet. And they're reciting them. It's not smart. It's not good. It has no bearing on you. It's just something you think sounds good. And that's a bit of rubbish because it may sound good, but it doesn't go anywhere.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
Once you've got through all that and people have told you that, they said, well, that your email sounds absolutely amazing, but I don't believe any of it at all. This is not you talking. You're giving snippets of everybody else. So whose life are you living, yours or somebody else's? And what they said, well, I don't care what they said.
Tony Mantor: Why Not Me the World
BONUS EPISODE: John Rushton: Navigating Human Emotions and the Power of Storytelling
You know, if they died tomorrow, you would still keep on living. So what is the problem? It's just getting really down to brass tacks.