Jesus Christ

Well, I can take any form I wish, and this particular one gets me through airport security faster.

Well, I can take any form I wish, and this particular one gets me through airport security faster.

No, no, I'm not happy about it. There's plenty of other things to be worried about right now. Planes are falling out of the sky. Boats are crashing into the Brooklyn Bridge. Newark Airport killed itself. I mean... Not to brag, but when I was on Earth, we had zero plane crashes.

No, no, I'm not happy about it. There's plenty of other things to be worried about right now. Planes are falling out of the sky. Boats are crashing into the Brooklyn Bridge. Newark Airport killed itself. I mean... Not to brag, but when I was on Earth, we had zero plane crashes.

This shitty painting? The one that looks like it was made at a bachelorette party drink and draw? I've seen better portraits of myself on toast, okay? You think this is how I want to be seen? Hovering over a boat full of sailors? Hey, everybody, look! It's that famous painting, Jesus Drowns in Semen. No, no, no, no, no. I was fine in the basement. I've had my pictures in worse places.

This shitty painting? The one that looks like it was made at a bachelorette party drink and draw? I've seen better portraits of myself on toast, okay? You think this is how I want to be seen? Hovering over a boat full of sailors? Hey, everybody, look! It's that famous painting, Jesus Drowns in Semen. No, no, no, no, no. I was fine in the basement. I've had my pictures in worse places.

Irish grandmother's bedrooms, prison cells, Mexican restaurants with a C health rating. We grandes las cucarachas. No me gusta. La point is, worry about stuff that's actually going on.

Irish grandmother's bedrooms, prison cells, Mexican restaurants with a C health rating. We grandes las cucarachas. No me gusta. La point is, worry about stuff that's actually going on.

I've got more important things on my plate than fixing all your unforced errors. There's war, famine, the Knicks. You're welcome, by the way. Oh, whoa, holy... Wait, wait, wait. So that was you. Oh, no. The Knicks got this far by themselves. Of course it was me. Okay, so are they going to go all the way? Oh, my God, this really is a comedy show.

I've got more important things on my plate than fixing all your unforced errors. There's war, famine, the Knicks. You're welcome, by the way. Oh, whoa, holy... Wait, wait, wait. So that was you. Oh, no. The Knicks got this far by themselves. Of course it was me. Okay, so are they going to go all the way? Oh, my God, this really is a comedy show.

No f***ing way, all right? I hate that guy. Not my best work, you know? You can't make the body long and the head long. I mean, what was I thinking?

No f***ing way, all right? I hate that guy. Not my best work, you know? You can't make the body long and the head long. I mean, what was I thinking?