Jay Shetty

We have to close off a little bit and go, am I asking the right question to the right person or am I asking the right question to the wrong person?

We have to close off a little bit and go, am I asking the right question to the right person or am I asking the right question to the wrong person?

Yes. When you ask someone a question, We think their answer is a prediction of the future, but actually it's a projection of their values. It's a projection of their insecurities. It's a projection of what they believed was possible for them. I'll give an example. I remember a friend of mine was starting to date another girl that we knew.

Yes. When you ask someone a question, We think their answer is a prediction of the future, but actually it's a projection of their values. It's a projection of their insecurities. It's a projection of what they believed was possible for them. I'll give an example. I remember a friend of mine was starting to date another girl that we knew.

And when he asked all our guy friends what they thought of this girl, they all said, she's a bit dominant. She's a bit controlling. And it was really interesting because I was watching this happen and he responded and said, I kind of like it when a woman's in charge. He said, I really like it when a woman takes the lead.

And when he asked all our guy friends what they thought of this girl, they all said, she's a bit dominant. She's a bit controlling. And it was really interesting because I was watching this happen and he responded and said, I kind of like it when a woman's in charge. He said, I really like it when a woman takes the lead.

And he goes, she may take the lead emotionally, but I take the lead financially. And so he goes, I'm not threatened by that. I'm actually really comfortable about it. But all of my other guy friends were really uncomfortable about that. Now, does this make them wrong in him, right? No. It's just showing that we all have a different skew. We have a different priority. We have a different take.

And he goes, she may take the lead emotionally, but I take the lead financially. And so he goes, I'm not threatened by that. I'm actually really comfortable about it. But all of my other guy friends were really uncomfortable about that. Now, does this make them wrong in him, right? No. It's just showing that we all have a different skew. We have a different priority. We have a different take.

But all of the guys were like, no, she's the worst. Like, I would never date her. Like, don't go out with her. And he's now happily married to her. And they have a great relationship. Now, if he would have listened to them, because he thought, wait a minute, there's seven people here that I trust and respect telling me that this woman's wrong for me, he would have made the wrong decision.

But all of the guys were like, no, she's the worst. Like, I would never date her. Like, don't go out with her. And he's now happily married to her. And they have a great relationship. Now, if he would have listened to them, because he thought, wait a minute, there's seven people here that I trust and respect telling me that this woman's wrong for me, he would have made the wrong decision.

And so I think so many of us don't actually base our decisions on even our self-worth or our self-awareness or our self-knowledge. We base it on other people's insecurities. And if you're making big decisions based on other people's little insecurities, you're setting yourself up for a big failure because you may move away from someone who's so close to being the right person for you.

And so I think so many of us don't actually base our decisions on even our self-worth or our self-awareness or our self-knowledge. We base it on other people's insecurities. And if you're making big decisions based on other people's little insecurities, you're setting yourself up for a big failure because you may move away from someone who's so close to being the right person for you.

Absolutely, you're spot on. And the reason why you want to get to a point where you're only hearing your voice is one voice is easier to manage than 30 voices, right? Like, let's just be honest. Most of us are surrounded by 30, 40, 50 opinions. So yes, when you disappear, move away from all the opinions. The way I recommend you do that is doing a 30-day opinions fast.

Absolutely, you're spot on. And the reason why you want to get to a point where you're only hearing your voice is one voice is easier to manage than 30 voices, right? Like, let's just be honest. Most of us are surrounded by 30, 40, 50 opinions. So yes, when you disappear, move away from all the opinions. The way I recommend you do that is doing a 30-day opinions fast.

And if 30 days is too long, try a seven-day opinion fast. So for seven days, Anytime you think about asking someone for their opinion, whether it's what should I wear? What should I eat? What movie should I watch? What TV show should I watch? For the next seven days, you're not allowed to ask anyone. So every time you have that inkling of, oh, let me just ask Lisa, what should I do? No, no, no.

And if 30 days is too long, try a seven-day opinion fast. So for seven days, Anytime you think about asking someone for their opinion, whether it's what should I wear? What should I eat? What movie should I watch? What TV show should I watch? For the next seven days, you're not allowed to ask anyone. So every time you have that inkling of, oh, let me just ask Lisa, what should I do? No, no, no.

I'm going to ask myself first. I'm going to ask myself and I'm going to have the courage to make the decision and go out there anyway. So I'm going to resist that urge to try on the outfit, take a picture, send it to a group of friends, try on the other outfit. No, no, no. I'm just going to make a decision. And I'm going to see what it feels like. Let's start with really low hanging fruit.

I'm going to ask myself first. I'm going to ask myself and I'm going to have the courage to make the decision and go out there anyway. So I'm going to resist that urge to try on the outfit, take a picture, send it to a group of friends, try on the other outfit. No, no, no. I'm just going to make a decision. And I'm going to see what it feels like. Let's start with really low hanging fruit.

Let's not do it when we're going to like the biggest party of the year or whatever it is. Do it when you're going out for movie night, picking a dinner, picking a TV show to watch. Make it really simple. Do it for the simple things. When you start doing it for the simple things, what happens? You start realizing there was no right outfit. You start realizing there was no right pair of earrings.

Let's not do it when we're going to like the biggest party of the year or whatever it is. Do it when you're going out for movie night, picking a dinner, picking a TV show to watch. Make it really simple. Do it for the simple things. When you start doing it for the simple things, what happens? You start realizing there was no right outfit. You start realizing there was no right pair of earrings.