Huckleberry
Appearances
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
No. Nothing good happens in Ashe County, North Carolina.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Yeah. Got a lot of things on our mind, Buck. It's Christmas. The kids are out of control. Got to pay for private school. And I don't know what to wear at this year's Emmys.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
After I took a hot shit in the local Waffle House, I thought they'd run me out for good. Keep going on what has happened. This rogue team's drawn us in here for whatever reason it may be. I'm not sure. But the other thing is, we've got a badass Bigfoot that's still in these woods, I'll guarantee you.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
The Cherokee Devil. The Cherokee Devil, Chrissy. You ain't never seen the Cherokee Devil?
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
He's down by the whacking post, Chrissy, or the red shed as they called it. That's because my red rocket comes out every time I get in that red shed. That's where the local gals go to make a few extra bucks. Some people have lonely fans. We have the red shed. The red shed.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Trying to draw us in for an ambush or whatever the hell they're setting up.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Ain't like Anheuser-Busch. This Cherokee devil's going to be on the back of our head the minute we walk in them woods. Try to get our minds right. Get focused on what we have ahead.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Let's pull over and smoke a little Mountain Dew meth before we get into the game, shall we?
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Scary. Scary sound effects. That's my favorite. They just dump sound effect over sound effect.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
I bet Billy was there. I'm sorry, guys. I just can't take it anymore. We've been done chasing these monsters for a long time and ain't seen shit. My wife wants me to get a real job.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
I brought me an AK-47. If we decide to shoot anything, I'm going to be ready.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
We're ready, boss. If that other team thinks they're going to get us in that shed and ambush us, they're going to find out why I'm far.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
I won't tell you what's going to happen down there. What did he say? Did he say two states and three county fairs? Yes. Oh, funnel cakes? What's he talking about?
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
What's that? I want more gun-loading sound effects, please.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Listen, when you think about guys you want running after Satan, you think about huck, chuck, and fuck.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Oh, yeah. It does. I think we're a couple yards down from the QT. I used to smoke cigarettes here after high school. Oh, what? No. Okay. All right. I'll shut up, guys.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Hey, guys. See them trees right there, guys? Right here. Oh, the bow trees? Yeah.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Come on, Jeff, get on your feet in case we have to outrun the seven and a half foot red-eyed Bigfoot with claws that'll tear into human flesh. We can do this. Quick. That Weight Watchers is paying off now, Jeff.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Well, luckily he did not. We came mere inches from certain depth.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Yeah, I'm here. Yeah, we're here. Did you just do this, Buck? You guys there? All those lights and cameras behind me? Are those you? No.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
I've just seen a flicker right straight through here. Turn the lights off. Turn the lights off.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Turn the lights off. What about the camera lights? Except for the camera lights. I know.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Come on, guys. Get our shit together. We're trying to kill the Red Rocket. If we kill the Red Rocket, we'll go down in fame. But right now, all you guys want to do is bicker and complain about your light bulbs. Turn them on. Don't turn them on. Don't give a shit. Just don't look in his Red Rocket. Just don't stare at the Red Rocket. It's like a dog humping your leg.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
If you don't stare at him, the Red Rocket will go away.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Is that psychological warfare? Is that the definition of psychological warfare?
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
Please pull out your airplane bag.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
I'll stay here. Yeah. What is it? You're like at a, what is it, a bachelor party in Nashville? I'll stay here. You go back and make sure we get the boys' phone numbers.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
I'm really concerned about my little buddy Buck. He's having a hard time to get through this. But deep down, I know he's going to push himself because he knows this has to be done. What has to be done?
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
What is pushing you so hard to get this done? I don't know. There's an episode in the can somewhere. Look at his face. I know, look at his face. All that fake throwing up's got him upset.
The Commercial Break
12 Days of TCB: Don't Stare At The Red Rocket
You stay close, Huck. I'll be right behind you guys.