George M. Johnson
Appearances
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I mean, what better way to find out all of someone's awful opinions than putting them on a podcast?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Just give him a bowl of honeydew melon.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Cosmology here. So there have been both human beings from Earth who have ascended to Venus. And become Venusians, yes. But then there are also human beings on Earth who are reincarnated from native Venusians. Or are they the reincarnations of humans who ascended to Venus, became Venusian, and then reincarnated back into Earth?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Because is it a punishment if you get born back on Earth?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I was also thinking about that earlier today. Why?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I was going to ask. I was actually going to ask.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
No, because you said the X is to honor Christ. And so usually guys that still believe in the existence of Jesus Christ, but are also alien guys, they think Jesus was an alien.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
So Jesus chose to leave Venus and incarnate on Earth.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I'm up to speed. I'm on board.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
It is. So it is. I-L-U-M-I-N-E. It can... It can be a literary way of saying to brighten something like illuminate, but also it can be to spiritually or intellectually enlighten.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Do you think the rare earth metals inside my iPhone count? Should I press that to my pineal gland?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
It's a rocking motion. I didn't get any props. Should I have brought a prop to the part two?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I do love the undercurrent of like, well, he can't get better until he actually wants to because he's sick because he doesn't want it bad enough.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I feel like a lot of people who are selling you something dangerous will make a valid point about how everyone else who's doing that is pretty bad.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I'm selling you the good lead vitamins.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
You have to replace the Phaetons with the Lifetrons.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Okay, I think this guy's fucking bullshitting us because he was like, oh, we want to share these secrets with everyone. They shouldn't even be secrets. We want to tell them to everyone. But you knew Jim was sick. You've been waiting for Jim to fucking die.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
So you want to share it with everybody or not?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Lanzara is fucking gaslighting us.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
You know those hemorrhoids are hurting.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Sophie, you need to positronically charge it with the crystals. Obviously, Sophie, keep up.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Oh, yes. Gotta charge your air.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Have you heard the conspiracy theory that they replaced the sun with a different weaker sun?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
So I think that's what the problem is. Like, we're not consuming vital sun.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
We got this like stupid fucked up sun.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
There are living things in that water. Water that's alive is not good for you.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
But the crystals are alive. Yeah.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
If I ever get to Venus, I'm going to be there fucking Socrates. They're going to kill me for being so annoying.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
It's the Socrates of Venus.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
That's why dogs put their head out the window in the car.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Oh, the best water has stuff wiggling in it.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I'm fucking vital right now.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
That's like good for you. I guess the thing that really hits, if you could do one thing that would hit all four of these to cure you forever so you could become Venusian and get all the Lifetrons is, you know, like when you put a watermelon in a stream to cool off, Yes. So it's a sunny day. You're outside. It's windy. So the air is very vital.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
You put that melon in the water full of deer shit. So you definitely get giardia from eating it. And you'll live for fucking ever.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
You're never going to die. You only eat melon and you have giardia.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Sorry I keep bringing up diarrhea.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Okay, this is actually very serious. We need to find out if Jim's okay.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
He does make the molecules move around faster, right?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
But if the Lifetrons are coming off at a steam, why don't you just huff it?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
So they're anti-fluoride for sure.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I definitely don't look like I stayed up all night reading old Hungarian newspapers.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
that all atoms are made of lifetrons, which descend from the thoughtrons.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Oh, yeah, yeah. This is the kind of cult where health is beauty, beauty is health, right? I feel like that's very much sort of baked into the vibe here. What is his name? Lanzara? If Lanzara is not sexy, I'm not taking fruit advice from him. You know what? I bet everyone on Venus looks like those hot Nazis from the Star Trek planet where- Oh, where they tried to kill Wesley.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Yeah, where you can't break the rules.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
You know, what you're describing is what has happened to millions of young women on Instagram.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I don't know who or what Lee Pace is. I'm just talking about getting bad, bad health advice from a sexy person.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Anyway, I've Googled Lee Pace and it's not helping. He doesn't look familiar.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
The TV show with Gillian Anderson?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
All men look the same to me. I'm so sorry.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I started typing Lee Pace and Google asked me if I met Lenny Reif install. So like, just these are bad. These are bad on my computer. I can't.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Control and a plus. Yeah, you learned something today.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
What are these outfits? What is this from?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Okay, yeah, I'll watch that for sure.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
So he knows he's unkillable now. He's too life chronic.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
He's just in a Lifetronic mech suit. The Grim Reaper cannot touch him.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
He had it coming. He had it coming.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Where was this estate sale?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Because the book he needed didn't exist. That's why he had to write it.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
And you're like, that never happens to me. Mine doesn't ring.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Actually, that does happen to me.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Do you think the Venusians can leave voicemails? Maybe that's what the dreams are. Because I was going to ask, what's the difference between dream communication and telethon? Is this one easier? Maybe the dreams are the voicemails.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
You're positing a universe in which even our ascended masters get stuck in traffic.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
It's just LA. Everyone's eating at Erewhon. Mm-hmm.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I mean, what if that's I mean, the first river seems like it covers a lot of territory. What are the second two rivers?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Well, the first river cleansed the mind. The second river cleanses the colon.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I think that would really help. If the atoms are gunked up like the Lifetrons can't. They're not going to move around. The Lifetrons will stagnate.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Yeah, you need to re-stimulate the Lifetron receptors.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
There's a guy in a booth watching the surveillance camera, and if you disappear from the footage, you know your vibrational frequency is too high.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
And it's that the answers weren't in the fucking book.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
But how are you going to get any Lifetrons that way?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Distilled water is the most dead water you can get.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I'm just saying if we're talking about like vital forces, distilled water is dead. Go to a river.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
It's too vital. They would have vibrated too hard. The L.A.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
What fruit are you picking?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
You can only eat so many of those.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Mangoes are really good choice.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
It's a great thing. Eating fruit should not have this many steps. This sounds like some Venusian bullshit, honestly. Did this come to you in a dream? Did this come to you in a dream?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Oh, man. I learned a lot about how to heal myself with vibrations and fruit.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
During our I guess we were gone for several days and or 10 minutes. I did discover that someone has made a LinkedIn page for Valiant Thor. I don't think he is still alive, but he does have a LinkedIn page that shows he still works at the Space Missile Defense Command.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I'm probably going to go eat some clementines because I buy them in a big bag from Costco. So if I don't eat them 15 at a time, they go bad. And then I feel bad. So I make myself feel bad by eating too many fruits.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
That was before Andy Dick got caught hanging out with those neo-Nazis.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I mean, I do like a raw meat, but under a very specific circumstance.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Oh, I don't eat fish. I'm afraid of the ocean. I'm talking about steak tartare.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Wow, true, just raw, raw and uncut.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Yeah, you can listen to Weird Little Guys every Thursday wherever you get your podcasts. It's fun, and it won't make you sad, probably. It will make you sad. It'll make you sad. But you'll like it.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Advisor to the Joint Chiefs of Staff.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Yep. Yeah. He's the Space Missile Defense Command is part of the army. So he advises the Joint Chiefs of Staff. OK. Yeah.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I'm ready to get healed. I'm ready to get healed.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
How is this Zillow ad helping me understand my lifetrons?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Is it possible that these guys just weren't getting enough fiber before, and that's why they feel better right away?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Like Salisbury steak and cigarettes. Like, he hasn't shit in days.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Doctors can't figure it out.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
I mean, I don't know if you guys heard the news, but cat turd has a bowel impaction. So this is a very real problem facing America's men.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Actually, I need a step before that one. That can't be step one.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Where's my pituitary gland?
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
So I imagine he's like pressing a crystal to the front and back of his head.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Okay, this makes perfect sense to me. Go on.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Yeah, the number of words he's...
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Right, they've moved beyond it. They've graduated from it.
Behind the Bastards
Part Two: Space Magic from Venus: A Literary Odyssey
Jim's obviously special, right? Because he's seen the crap. He is special. And that wasn't a coincidence.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 175
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 175
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 175
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 175
We are the greatest culture makers in world history. Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 174
Knowing that she had six months to live, I was no longer pretending that this was my best friend.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 174
Knowing that she had six months to live, I was no longer pretending that this was my best friend.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 177
I'm ready to fight. Oh, this is fighting worse. Okay, I'll put the hammer back. Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 177
We are the greatest culture makers in world history. Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a bestselling author with the second most banned book in America. Now, more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back. And that's what we're doing on Fighting Words. We're not going to let anyone silence us.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a bestselling author with the second most banned book in America. Now, more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back. And that's what we're doing on Fighting Words. We're not going to let anyone silence us.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a bestselling author with the second most banned book in America. Now, more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back. And that's what we're doing on Fighting Words. We're not going to let anyone silence us.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back. And that's what we're doing on Fighting Words. We're not going to let anyone silence us.
Behind the Bastards
It Could Happen Here Weekly 176
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: Age Is Just A Bummer
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: Age Is Just A Bummer
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: Age Is Just A Bummer
Part of the power of Black queer creativity is the fact that we got us, you know? We are the greatest culture makers in world history.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: Age Is Just A Bummer
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: Age Is Just A Bummer
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: Age Is Just A Bummer
Part of the power of Black queer creativity is the fact that we got us, you know? We are the greatest culture makers in world history.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: After Date Double Trouble
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: After Date Double Trouble
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: After Date Double Trouble
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Brooke and Jeffrey: Second Date Update
Second Date Update: After Date Double Trouble
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Stuff You Should Know
Richard III: Good Guy or Evil Putz?
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a bestselling author with the second most banned book in America. Now, more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back. And that's what we're doing on Fighting Words. We're not going to let anyone silence us.
Stuff You Should Know
Richard III: Good Guy or Evil Putz?
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Stuff You Should Know
Richard III: Good Guy or Evil Putz?
Roger Caron was 16 when first convicted. Has spent 24 of those years in jail.
Stuff You Should Know
Richard III: Good Guy or Evil Putz?
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a bestselling author with the second most banned book in America. Now, more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back. And that's what we're doing on Fighting Words. We're not going to let anyone silence us.
Stuff You Should Know
Richard III: Good Guy or Evil Putz?
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Stuff You Should Know
Give My Regards to the Broadway Episode!
I'm ready to fight. Oh, this is fighting worse. Okay, I'll put the hammer back. Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Stuff You Should Know
Give My Regards to the Broadway Episode!
We are the greatest culture makers in world history. Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Stuff You Should Know
Selects: Agatha Christie: Queen of the Murder Mystery
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Stuff You Should Know
Selects: Agatha Christie: Queen of the Murder Mystery
Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Stuff You Should Know
Selects: Agatha Christie: Queen of the Murder Mystery
Hi, I'm George M. Johnson, a best-selling author with the second most banned book in America. Now more than ever, we need to use our voices to fight back.
Stuff You Should Know
Selects: Agatha Christie: Queen of the Murder Mystery
We are the greatest culture makers in world history. Listen to Fighting Words on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.