Doug Stanhope

I'm sure that's one of those gigs I'd love, but my own. I'd just go, hey, let's go, me and Andy, let's go have fucking fun like we used to and not give a shit about the money. I love it. Where people are just happy you showed up. Yes, here, here.

I'm not going to forget the bodega.

I'm not going to forget the bodega.

I'm not going to forget the bodega.

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Yeah, and I was nobody, obviously. I'm still nobody, but I was really nobody. And someone goes, hey, there's a party at Bill Maher's house. I had just moved to L.A., maybe 96, 95, 96. Had to be 96, because it was Fourth of July. And she's like, hey, there's a party if you want to go and crash it. And I'm like, yeah. I would do everything when I was young. It's free booze, and he's a comic. Yeah.

Yeah, and I was nobody, obviously. I'm still nobody, but I was really nobody. And someone goes, hey, there's a party at Bill Maher's house. I had just moved to L.A., maybe 96, 95, 96. Had to be 96, because it was Fourth of July. And she's like, hey, there's a party if you want to go and crash it. And I'm like, yeah. I would do everything when I was young. It's free booze, and he's a comic. Yeah.

Yeah, and I was nobody, obviously. I'm still nobody, but I was really nobody. And someone goes, hey, there's a party at Bill Maher's house. I had just moved to L.A., maybe 96, 95, 96. Had to be 96, because it was Fourth of July. And she's like, hey, there's a party if you want to go and crash it. And I'm like, yeah. I would do everything when I was young. It's free booze, and he's a comic. Yeah.

And I show up and it's all like just one of those industry parties where it's still kind of daylight and everyone's like, no one's really talking. And if they are, it's industry talking to industry. And you hope, oh, Jeff Cesario's here, but I'm fucking 19 and he's still 60. Right. And so at some point I drink enough of their free booze that I fucking, I used to get naked all the time.

And I show up and it's all like just one of those industry parties where it's still kind of daylight and everyone's like, no one's really talking. And if they are, it's industry talking to industry. And you hope, oh, Jeff Cesario's here, but I'm fucking 19 and he's still 60. Right. And so at some point I drink enough of their free booze that I fucking, I used to get naked all the time.

And I show up and it's all like just one of those industry parties where it's still kind of daylight and everyone's like, no one's really talking. And if they are, it's industry talking to industry. And you hope, oh, Jeff Cesario's here, but I'm fucking 19 and he's still 60. Right. And so at some point I drink enough of their free booze that I fucking, I used to get naked all the time.

That's why it's like when Louie pulled his dick out in front of people. I've had so many people have seen my dick. If there was a class action lawsuit, you couldn't pass out enough fucking mailers. Yeah. So I just jump in their pool naked. Yep. He's in the pool now. They're like, eh. I thought, hey, come on, I'll start the party. And nothing. And then he's not even at the party. He's upstairs.

That's why it's like when Louie pulled his dick out in front of people. I've had so many people have seen my dick. If there was a class action lawsuit, you couldn't pass out enough fucking mailers. Yeah. So I just jump in their pool naked. Yep. He's in the pool now. They're like, eh. I thought, hey, come on, I'll start the party. And nothing. And then he's not even at the party. He's upstairs.

That's why it's like when Louie pulled his dick out in front of people. I've had so many people have seen my dick. If there was a class action lawsuit, you couldn't pass out enough fucking mailers. Yeah. So I just jump in their pool naked. Yep. He's in the pool now. They're like, eh. I thought, hey, come on, I'll start the party. And nothing. And then he's not even at the party. He's upstairs.

And then he comes down like fucking, not Rocky Balboa, but fucking his opponent, Apollo Creed. He comes down wearing a fucking 4th of July top hat. Oh, man. And this is like politically incorrect. Right. But he comes down and he's just Hugh Hefnering. But as a troll, he's always been a troll and he's just grown into it so horrifically.

And then he comes down like fucking, not Rocky Balboa, but fucking his opponent, Apollo Creed. He comes down wearing a fucking 4th of July top hat. Oh, man. And this is like politically incorrect. Right. But he comes down and he's just Hugh Hefnering. But as a troll, he's always been a troll and he's just grown into it so horrifically.

And then he comes down like fucking, not Rocky Balboa, but fucking his opponent, Apollo Creed. He comes down wearing a fucking 4th of July top hat. Oh, man. And this is like politically incorrect. Right. But he comes down and he's just Hugh Hefnering. But as a troll, he's always been a troll and he's just grown into it so horrifically.

I remember seeing an episode of him making fun of Kim Jong Un's fucking hair. And you go, look in the fucking mirror. Yeah. You have a fucking helmet of this ridiculous bulbous nose. You're a fucking... And I'm not a person to fucking point... Fingers and awkward heads.