David Jacoby
Appearances
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Zach Levine and Jimmy Butler I don't think would be trading. And I think to bring Jimmy Butler, you have to match the salary. So you're giving up, whatever, $40 million worth of players to bring in Jimmy Butler who wants a new contract and has a $52 million player option that he might exercise. It just seems like, who is Jimmy Butler away from contending? And if you're the Thunder...
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
You're going to add a player later. Chet Holmgren, your third best player and your second big. If you were the Thunder, why would you ever even think about picking up a phone call from Miami? I would not.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Are they Jimmy Butler away from contending?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
We're not stopping until we get to Uncle House's house. We gotta get to Uncle House's house.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
It's also like the Jimmy Butler thing from Shams earlier this morning was like, oh, here are the teams that he wants to go to. It's like, cool. It's kind of like the NFL. Go find yourself a trade. Go ahead. Find one. Just because you want to go to those teams doesn't mean there's a deal between us and those teams.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
And to put that out publicly, it almost feels like they don't really understand the implications of the new CBA. It's not happening. That's a great point, dude.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Okay, that's a fair point, and I totally understand that thinking. I think the cup works, but I'll address your question, and I'll say this. How upset are the Mavs right now, after being on the road for like a month, having everyone be sick, and they're like, oh, we don't have to go to Vegas, and we get, what, seven days off in the middle of the year to sort of get healthy?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I think the Mavs are on the plane being like, yeah, it kind of sucks. I wish we won, but... I don't know. I don't think they're really bummed tonight.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Yeah. But it's four teams. To me, it's four teams like the Hawks, the Rockets, and the Thunder. I think it's really for up-and-coming teams to get one-and-you're-done experience. So I don't think it's broken, but I think there are certain teams like the Celtics coming off a championship where we get to win the Emirates Cup. No, I'm good. I'll take the time. off.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
That's what I think they should do. You can't fall lower than six. If you win. You got to move it later in the season then because like if you're locked into six, like what are we doing?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
No, it would be like an insignificant draft pick thing. You get an extra second rounder or something. It's like, okay, great.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
lose a game seven at home and you just like stick them with some sort of terrible competitive disadvantage like like a rule changes like tj would just come out at halftime and be like all right guys here here are the four point shots right three circles yeah no corner threes i think they should use it as a testing ground for like rule changes like i think that'd be kind of fun if they were just like
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
No three point line and not a four point line or there's no corner threes. I think I think that'd be fun. And I understand like there are reasons you can do that. But just while we're spitballing, I think sort of experimenting about rule changes or court changes you've been considering in these games because they are different. It could be a playground for that.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I know, but here's the thing. But if you're in a pickup game and you're down six, you want SGA on your team so you stay on the court. You know what I mean? You always associate guys you want to play pickup with with guys that move the ball and get teammates involved. No, I want to stay on the court. Yeah, but you have SGA just to stay on the court. That's why he's good to play pickup.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Body Language Doctor doesn't love that duo as much as I wanted to when he signed. But we always, like, I think people are critical of Dame. It's like, he scores 25.7 points a game and gets 7.5 assists a game. Like... And he's like 37% from three now. Is that so bad? Yeah. Like, is that so bad? Like, is that... What are we being critical of, really?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
And, you know, Dairy Bird... Torian Prince is shooting 54% from three on, like... 3.6 attempts or something. It's not fake. They're surrounding two of the biggest offensive weapons in the league with shooting. Defensively, we can just pass over that. They're not stopping anybody. It's tough. And when they won it all, they were great on defense.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
It's the defense. It's just, it's on a different level than every other team. I don't want to play against this team. You can just see the frustration on the body language of the Mavs. They can't throw basic passes without being harassed. Like, you remember that lively rebound he got and the cruiser just knocked it out of bounds? It's just annoying. They're just swarming wasps.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Yeah, and even tonight, Suggs had Dame in front of him, and he dribbled between his legs like four times, then just shot a three. It was like, Suggs, that's Dame Lillard. Just put your shoulder down and go past him. And a key point, I was really disappointed in that particular possession because I think there's a reason that when Dame is guarding somebody that there's no screener.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
There's a reason.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I bought a lot of Suggs stock preseason because of defense. I didn't see this Suggs, but it is. This is Gonzaga Suggs. It just seems like Paolo's playing so well. And then Franz steps up and plays so well. And then Franz is out. Now Suggs steps up and plays. If Suggs has a legit hurt hand, it's going to be like Mo Wagner scores 30 and 12 and 10. It's like, what is happening?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
And it's so frustrating because I was rooting for the Mavs because I wanted a close game. And it's just impossible to do anything against them. It's awful.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
It just seems like someone on that team is going to play like an all-star no matter what happens.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Yep.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Totally different player. Totally different player. I was shocked.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Who's that? Oh, Anthony Black.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Hold on. This is just too much. Too much for me. They don't have a player that can hit a three-point shot in 2024. They don't have one. So can we just address that? They don't have a player that can hit a three-point shot.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Is that so scared to play? I'm so scared to play him in the playoffs.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I'm sorry. No one wants to see this team in the playoffs.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Jacob, did you know where it was? Yeah, because they're called love handles. That's all you have to do. For us, for athletes, they're called obliques. For us, they're called love handles. That's what they are. They're your love handles. Your love handles are your obliques. It's a love handle injury that is sweeping through the magic locker room. Love handles.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
He's like, I don't know. Did he get injected with COVID? Is that his COVID shot now?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
No, it's this fat guy from Serbia, actually.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
What the fuck is going on? What is going on? My questions for you, Bill, are what is the plan? Do his teammates like him? And all I hear about is how little he communicates with the team about his availability, how he's late all the time. Like, Verno knew some guy who said he missed the team buses the day after the report came out that he was late. It's just all like...
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
He's become, in the last three years, he's turned from one of the most likable stars in the league to someone who I'd like less and less and less every three months. And we're there right now. So here's where I've landed, Goldsberry.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I watched the game. It was weird. He started out terrible. He was 0 for 7 or something. Everything was short. That Memphis game was the same thing where everything was short. And he has this brace, his full leg brace on. And they started to get warmed up. And they're spamming this...
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
They're spamming this high pick and roll with him and Maxie and Maxie would just give him a pocket pass and he would just shoot from like 16 feet and Busevich just didn't do anything about it. And even if Busevich was on him, he would just jab step and then shoot over him. And he was like, I don't have the numbers for him.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
He's like eight for 10 from like around the foul line, which is where, in my opinion, when he was best with actually Doc was coach, he would just like operate from the foul line, but he would do a lot of distributing and like, driving, but it got to the point where in the third quarter, he was just absolutely wet from the mid-range.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
He scored a ton of points after starting over seven, looking like he might as well just go back on the bench.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
You know, one of the things that analysts always say about Luka is, like, you can't speed him up. You can't speed him up. There's a part of me that's like, hey, Luka, can you speed up? Like, you know, it's like, oh, you can't speed him up. He's always at his own pace. It's like, cool, cool, cool. How about you, like, move a little bit off the ball?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
100%.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
My favorite rookie?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
In terms of like to watch or like I would want on my team. Because, I mean, my favorite rookie is obviously Jared McCain, just like as a vibe. Yeah. You know what I mean? Because he's so much fun and just sort of like so himself off the court. But I am also on Reese's Shea Island.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
That team of Johnson, Daniels, Risa Shea, it's like Trey or no Trey, that is a core that I really, really like. I'm much higher in Atlanta than I should be, and I'll admit that, but I feel the same about Risa Shea. He had a huge game. I forget who it was against. It was early in the season. He had like 30 points or something. I was like, this dude looks like a number one pick in the NBA draft.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Like, there's a couple of sessions he was just, like, in the corner. Like, he's kind of getting that James Harden off-ball energy. They're like, oh, someone else has the ball, so I'm just going to stand here with my arms at my sides, like, straight up and down. It's like... It was a frustrating Luka day.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
They were doubling him early, which I think was smart because they doubled him early and kind of got the ball out of his hands and didn't let him catch a rhythm until the second half for like a brief spurt.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Huffing Aldama. Yeah, you can't take minutes away from Huffing Aldama. What are you crazy? No, those guys are just... He's also not available. He's just not available right now. We haven't seen him too much.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I mean, you're leading the witness, so I'm going to try to go with another team.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I'm trying to. But, I mean, obviously the most disappointing team is the Sixers, but I think there's a reason for that. It's just availability. I think the Sixers will turn around and end up being a playoff team. Let's not forget they were in the play-in last year. and ended up in a really good series against the Knicks. But it has to be the Pacers and Halliburton.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Remember this time last year, during the in-season tournament, it was called at the time, they were the bell of the ball, and Halliburton was this rising superstar. They put him in this stupid commercial with Rosario Dawson, and he's not even a factor whatsoever. And his home road stuff is really strange. I don't think I've seen anything like that.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
But, yeah, I would say the Pacers because it's, you know, the expectations were at a point where they're just not reaching.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
They don't have KD. Okay.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
They've made the Beal trade where you're like, that's great. Well, like no one liked that trade.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Yeah, I can see it. Counterpoint. You don't want to draw them in the first round of the playoffs. Because let's imagine KD plays well, gets back. They're going to climb in the standings. Like right now, I think they're 10th or whatever. They're going to climb in the standings. And then you see them in the first round. And you're like, man, Booker and KD can get on a heater. You know?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
It feels a little bit like they're basically the Sixers.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
No. No, the Rockets have zero. They're one of the best teams in the league. But they can play defense, though. Yes. Yeah.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Yeah. Smells like new owner decisions.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I don't think any of these teams would be a favorite in a series against the Thunder. And watching the Thunder tonight, watching them just fly around and watching SGA be like a true go-to weapon on offense the way that some of the Rockets don't have, to be honest with you.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
And then every once in a while, they cut to this guy in a velour sweatsuit in the second row with a big beard who looked like he leveled up. Chet, obviously I'm talking about. It's like he's coming back. They have a major weapon.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Yeah. I think that people sleep on the fact that they're doing all of this without him. And a lot of teams are missing players, but he's like, I don't know, second or third best player. Probably the third best player.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I think 65 might be a little high, but I think they're going to run away with the number one seed in the Western Conference, which is obviously the stronger conference. They're 19-5 right now for the record. I try to stay away from the MVP stuff. You know what I mean? On December. In game 24? Yeah. Yeah, but what Jokic has done has been very impressive.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
What he did this weekend, as you mentioned, I'm sure he's like, I don't want to take 39 shots in a basketball game.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
I know.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Hey, what did he do this weekend? Lose to the Wizards? Is that what caught your eye? Lost to the Wizards. Lost to the Wizards and beat the Hawks. Yeah. He scored 104 points. That's true. Killed the Hawks. It is crazy. It is crazy how little he has around him. The... What really jumped out at me about those two games was the Westbrook-Jokic connection. Westbrook was just feeding him.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
OKC’s Revenge, NBA Cup Nitpicks, and NFL Season Fun Grades with David Jacoby, Kirk Goldsberry, Kyle Brandt, and Craig Horlbeck
Westbrook was like, the best player on the planet is on my team. Let me just get him in a position to score. It was really impressive. I was impressed by Westbrook this weekend.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And it just felt like... Low-key felt like Brunson being out for that long was actually great for the Knicks because it gave Bridges and OG this time to score 20 points, 25 points, 30 points, and be a focus of the offense that would help them when they... you know, re-acclimated to the Brunson environment. Right. But right now, it just doesn't feel like it. It doesn't.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Oh, yeah.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
What he does is whether he's moving to his right or left or he's squared up to the hoop, he squares his shoulders to the hoop and he puts his hands up like he's throwing a soccer throw in pass. So the ball and then he flicks his wrist to get it there. That's why he doesn't shoot threes that well.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
If you're over 43, he shoots like a double dribble character. Like the ball goes up and his arms go up and then he releases the ball with his wrists only. And once you figure that out, I don't think anyone can figure it out, to be honest with you. I thought that he played so well in the fourth quarter of game four that today he just didn't really have it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He didn't get going in game four. Like he was absolutely on fire and took over the game. I thought that game four was one of my favorite basketball games I've ever seen with Tatum and Brunson in the third quarter. Just exchanging those punches was just, it was one of my favorite basketball games I've ever seen. You know what I mean?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Like I like basketball before, like the Knicks, like that was such a great game and it's too bad that Tatum was gone from it. But here's the question I have for you. Um, There was a point in game two, I think it was the start of the second half, when they just posted up Towns on the left block. And he got in that Carmelo spot, like 10, 12 feet from the basket. And they were obviously doing it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He would throw it in, throw it out. They were obviously doing it. And there's no Celtic defender that can cover him with his back to the basket 13 feet from the basket. And they just never go back to it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Horford, Towns, Brown, Tatum. There's no one on the roster. Maybe Luke Cornett. Maybe this new Luke Cornett.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
but it felt like a running back that was getting five yards of carry. I think it was game two. I think I'm pretty sure it was the third quarter game two where this went to it like three plays in a row. And I said to myself, why don't you just do this until they stop it? Just do this until they stop it. And they never go back to it. And like, why don't we see Brunson Towns pick and rolls?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Yeah, I'm looking at a shot chart.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Dude, I'm telling you, all of his five fouls had nothing to do with affecting the play defensively.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He's corny.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
What I love about Cornette is he's a very self-aware basketball player. He never tries to do anything outside of his skill set. You'll never see him fucking dribble the ball. You know what I mean? You'll never see him pull up for three, even though he came up as like a 40% three-point shooter. Like he's just never doing anything that's outside of his role and his skill set. He just doesn't do it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He's not going to make negative plays. I'm not going to look it up, but I bet he has like four turnovers on the year. He just does what he's supposed to do. He knows his role.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Well, I watch a lot of Mitch Robinson. I'm not a huge fan. He can't catch, number one. He cannot catch the ball. Number two, I will send you a link. There's a video of him playing like pickup against like regular humans. He looks like Kevin Durant, but taller and stronger. And I have a theory about Robinson. One of my favorite movies is The Prestige, right?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
You know, the big act at the end where they're like, how do you do this? They're like, well, I've got like a drunken twin brother. There is another Mitch Robinson they prestiged onto the free throw line tonight. Who else? He went six for six, dude.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
There are two twin Mitch Robinsons.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I mean, I've never seen, I've never seen, I've only seen one Mitch Robinson at a time.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
First of all, people that are listening to the Bill Simmons podcast want to hear that. And I'm honored to be here to respond to it. And I will say that I also am prepared to ask you these questions. Yeah. I never really considered the Jalen Brown trade. I think you're too much in the weeds. I think the questions that need to be asked are, is Horford gone? Is Porzingis gone? Is White gone?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Is Drew Holiday gone?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Is contract taken into account when you make that list? Is contract taken into account? Yeah, he's under $30 million still. So here's my take on the future of the Celtics. I think that Porzingis is gone. Holiday's gone.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
the PR people for the Celtics need to put out some sort of like Porzingis has this thing that's going to heal in two months and his trade value is going to go up. But I will say this. I think it's a Peyton Pritchard play. I really think it's like, it's, it's Pritchard is going to bridge this gap of scoring and playmaking and things that we lose with Tatum. He's that good.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Like, I think next year becomes like a Brown Pritchard. Yeah, it's going to be tough.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Here's a question I want to ask you that people want to hear. What do the Celtics look like next season?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
True holiday, 80 cents on the dollar. Porzingis, 25 cents on the dollar.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
It sucks. I mean, but they're going to win a lot of games in the Eastern Conference with no Tatum.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
They figured out that Porzingis sucks and Towns can't stop fouling people. That's what they figured out.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Two games ago? I mean, has he had a good playoff game?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Oh, you mean the 7'3 guy put his arms in the air and that was good?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
That's not people around the league. That's people like us that talking to microphones. It's just like fun to say, but why would they trade Jalen Brown? Jalen Brown is going to be the engine that brings the train to the next station, to the next station, to the next station next year. And there's 82 stops. You know what I mean? Like he is the engine of the train. He's going to drive it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And sometimes it's going to be ugly. And sometimes it's going to look great, but like, If you trade Jalen Brown, who do you get back that's going to be your go-to guy? It's going to be better than him. I don't know. No. And he's on the same timeline as Tatum. You won a championship 11 months ago. They won the championship. There's a parade 50 weeks ago.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
As long as you allow me to retort with how corny he is when you're done, go.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Him and LeBron.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Taking Giannis out of that.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Yeah, I know what you mean.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I will also say, to be nice about Tatum...
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
different running mates throughout the runs right there's like the isaiah thomas season you know there's a scary terry season it's just like a lot of different elements that he's always been the the constant variable in the equation where everything else sort of changed and he still had this consistent output another thing i'll say but nice about tatum not a lot of duds You know what I mean?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
You look at a lot of these star players and there's a couple of duds out there. You're like, oh yeah, like remember game two of the second round series where he was like, went four for 25. Like he doesn't have those games. He has ups and downs, but he doesn't have like dud, dud games.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And the thing as a non, former Celtics fan, I will say, I loved Larry Bird growing up. And here's a question I have for you is why can't I like connect to him as a person? Like, why do I think he's corny? Why do I think that he's inauthentic?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Like I was reminded by co-host of the mismatch Verno when they won last year, there was that like clip together of him sort of like cosplaying all these other Kobe moments and like Kevin Garnett moments. Like, like, why don't I connect to him as a person? I know nothing about his personality, other than the size of from the fact that he has a son named Deuce.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Like, why do I think that he's corny and inauthentic? I'm asking you that question, not because I'm trying to accuse him of something or insult him. I just want you to put me on the couch and tell me why I feel that way.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
No, I think it's, I think it's, it kind of goes into like the X player pods where it's like, he's really good at basketball. Maybe he's not the best in the press conference. Maybe he's not going to make you laugh. You know what I mean? Like maybe he's not Peyton Manning's going to host SNL, but like we, that's not why we love him. We love him because he's a basketball player.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
So why do we knock him for not being a great personality?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I mean,
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
You're an asshole. It's. I really could have gone two ways. I'm not really happy the way it went, to be honest with you. You know, I'm really not happy with the way.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I don't know who LeBron James is, dude. I don't even want to start down that path. I don't want to start down that path.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And they're fucking awesome. And you want to hang out with them. And they make you laugh. And you're like, they're cool. They sit at the lunch table that you are not allowed to sit at. That's why I like my professional athletes. I want my professional athletes to be at the table in the cafeteria that I'm scared to look at and I'm never allowed to sit at. You know what I mean?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And I feel like Tatum's not there. And I'm not knocking him for it. I'm just talking about it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He just wants to 25 and 10 and six. Yeah. So that's what I'm going to do. Yeah.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
There's two pieces of information that we got today that I found really telling. And I found kind of like, brought me into the Tatum psyche and circle, which I loved. One was Marcus Spears, not my favorite Marcus Spears, Swagoo. Um, I love the other Marcus Spears, but I love the football Marcus Spears. So, so, so very much.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
The basketball one. He said that he spoke with Tatum's father, who's a coaching in Malaysia or whatever. And he, and he was allowed to talk about his conversation with his father about his conversation with Jason. And his father said to Jason Tatum, he said, your idol is Kobe Bryant. Hmm. your idol is Kobe Bryant. That's the path you wanted to go down. And this is part of the path.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And that's not a direct quote, but I found that to be like, as a father and, you know, I thought that was like a really cool thing to say. And I'm really glad that Spears got that information to share with us. And another thing, I don't know if you heard this part of the broadcast is Reggie said he texted with Tatum and he sort of like read the text on the broadcast.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And I was sitting there, I felt it was like, I felt it like a violation of trust, but obviously Reggie texted him and Tatum sort of sent this message to Celtics fans. And it was while they were like up by 20 at the end of the third quarter. And he was like, and I can't, I can't, can't paraphrase.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I just watched it, you know, 40 minutes ago, but he's, he's like, Jason Tatum said he can't wait to get back into the Celtic green. And he's going to show the fans how much that means to him. And as someone who sat on a pretty popular podcast, uh, 10 minutes ago, I was like, I don't understand this guy. Don't get his personality. Try to critique him in that way.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Those two pieces of information getting into my brain was so fucking cool. You know what I mean? Like, the idea that, like, his dad gave him this guidance when he's at probably the worst... day of his life.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And that he texted Reggie knowing it's going to get read on the broadcast in front of millions of people that this message to Celtics fans about his appreciation of his, his position in the sport.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I thought that was a really cool thing to hear today when there's been so much information about how long the injury is going to take and what's it going to be like when he comes back and what does it do with the roster? Like hearing that from him, I found touch.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
ex Nick, by the way, Westchester, Nick legend, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yes. There's, I remember hearing from Nick face be like, there's this guy in Westchester. He's like seven feet tall. He hits threes and he's got ball skills.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He doesn't even shoot threes now. Yeah. But no, um, I do think the Knicks will eventually win the series, but I had a feeling they would lose this one. And now it just... I don't feel good about anything right now. Because now it's just like, you have to win Game 7. My Knicks group chat... Game 6, you're right.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Here's what your listeners want to know. Here's what your listeners want to know.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
How's it been for you the last 48 hours? What are you going through? I don't know. We've talked about what Jason Tatum's going through, but people listen to this podcast, they care about Bill Simmons. It's the Bill Simmons podcast. What have you been doing the last 48 hours?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
What is the most like intrusive thought that you had?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Was there ever a part of you that was like, maybe next year it doesn't help us to win basketball games?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
As a Knicks fan, I kind of wish... I wish he never got hurt, but I feel like the Knicks win this series with Tatum not getting hurt. And that's a whole hypothetical. We don't have to go down. But one thing that I heard on this podcast from you.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He was going up nine. And with Brunson, like, please, that's a win, a 3-1.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
But I was listening to this stupid podcast driving back from upstate. Like it was a pandemic. Might've been like, it's not the bubble. Maybe it was the bubble of the year after the bubble. And you were talking about the Celtics and just how like fickle the windows are. You know what I mean?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
You were just talking about like, it was, I think it was, I think it was the, I can't remember if it was the bubble year or the year after the bubble. but you were talking during the playoffs around this time of year, just about like, Hey man, with these windows, like you think you got a chance next year, but like you really don't like this. Like sometimes it's a six month window.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Sometimes it's a two year window. And I think that this injury and this moment is just a good example of that. The Celtics are favorites to win the East. If not the championship, they're, They're number two seed, but we all secretly know that they're the best team in the Eastern Conference. And we're talking about repeat championships.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And then this happens, and we're talking about should they win games next year or tank for a pick? That's just how fragile these things are.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
My Knicks group chat has gone from we need to trade for Giannis right around Game 3 to who do you think would be a better matchup in the finals, the Thunder or the Wolves, to... Must win game six in the garden.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
but at least there was a Klay Thompson game. As a Knicks fan, I'm going to look back and be like, and then Luke Cornett came in for KP to start the second half.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
In the first round in 93, they beat the Pacers. 94, conference finals, they beat the Pacers. 95, second round. I know you know all this, but I just want to set this up as a potential Knicks-Pacers series. Second round, the Pacers win in a game seven. That's 3-4-5, they go head-to-head. 98, second round, the Pacers beat them again. 99... The Knicks win in the conference finals like that.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And then it's not just like last year. And then in 2000, the Pacers beat them like Pacers. Knicks is not like I think this is like people hype up like Celtics. Knicks is a rivalry, but they don't really meet in the postseason. Like, I think if the Knicks have a rival, it is the Pacers.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Who directed that? My guy, right?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And Hicks versus Knicks, did they interview Jalen? They must have.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Dwight, Dwight's in slippers. What are you even doing? What are you even doing? What are you doing, Dwight? What are you doing, Dwight?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And I think that, again, I revisited last year's Pacers-Knicks series. And if there is a Pacers-Knicks finals, it's Eastern Conference finals, which I believe there will be. It was a lot closer than I remember. And OG getting hurt was huge. Brunson getting hurt. It wasn't just... I just feel like it's a good matchup.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And I've listened to your stupid pod, and I know you're all Pacers all the time, and all the basketball people are so excited about the Pacers, but I think the Knicks should be and will win that series if it comes down to it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
The Celtics were minus 900 before the series started.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
It's so I just think that I would hate that this goes down as like the series where Tatum got hurt because I really liked it as the series where the Knicks shit the bed in game one at home and shit the bed game two at home and then DNA in the pool in game four. That was my favorite. That was my favorite part of the DNA in the pool game. You know,
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I've got a couple of things on that. One is I wanted to go to game four because we were doing the mismatch after the game. And I was like, it'd be good for the show, whatever. I was like, you know, I've got some expendable money. I'll just do it. It was like $900 to sit like in the last row. I just couldn't bring myself. It's 900. Like, I just can't. Like, I've got children.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Like, I just can't do it. And another story I want to tell about game two is they have the watch party outside of the garden, right? They kind of like, there's a plaza there. Just like most places do like beer garden in Milwaukee or whatever. And I was doing the Spotify new front shop to the sales Spotify people. And I did that event and it was right next to that watch party.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Oh, the Pacers. Yes. The Pacers are really good. And also the, you know, I revisited the Pacers Knicks series from last season and And I had to like sort of freshen up on it because I remember game seven was such a big deal and everyone was hurt and OG tried to play. It's just like Brunson's hurt and no one was there.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And it was like the second quarter. I went to a bar by the garden and I had a couple of beers and watch the game and they started to come back. And I was like, you know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna see if they win. And I'm going to go to the watch party because you've seen the stuff on social from that area. Yeah. And I went there.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And I was super excited about the energy from the Knicks fans and everything. But it was really a commentary on the content creation generation. Because everyone was there with their phones out to create content for social. Guilty as charged. It was me too. I did the exact same thing. But it's not this... I remember me and Kevin Wilds went to 7th Avenue outside the Riviera after the...
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
the Red Sox beat the Yankees. And Seventh Avenue was shut down. It was all Red Sox fans. And we were all there together, just high-fiving each other, being a big family. And it was before video was on the internet. So we weren't like capturing things with our phones. And again, I sound like an old guy or whatever, but like when I went to this one, I was doing the same thing.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
It was just kind of like, who's got the best shot for my Instagram story? So you're looking, you're cruising the crowd being like, who's the most excited? Who's got the best chance? Who can I film for this, this moment? So I think that when you view it and you're not there, it's a very different experience than living it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
It was kind of like, I get it. I'm guilty. I did it too. I'm not being critical. It was just like, it's just a different time. It's like when you go to a concert and people are just like filming the concert, like there's professional cameras. Like if you want to watch this later, you can do that. How about you just chill and watch it now?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
We sound like old guys and I get it, but I paid $1,000 to watch them do their thing, but you really paid $1,000 to film yourself watching them do their thing for the people that are following you or whatever.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
But like game one and game two, kind of like this series that came down to the end. And remember Carlisle got kicked out of a game. I forgot about that. And he's like small market teams deserve fouls too. There's some chippiness. There was some real like, stuff there. It was a good series.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
We're putting out Instagram stories. It literally disappears in 24 hours.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
So I don't want to make this too reductive, right? But doesn't it just come down to a coach decides who we're going to leave open and whether or not that person makes the shot. You know what I mean? It's like very reductive. It's like, we're going to leave Ludard open. It's like, oh, Porter Jr. He's got a hurt shoulder. He hasn't hit. We're going to leave him open. Porter Jr.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
and Westbrook, like it barely hit the rim in the fourth quarter.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And the Jalen Williams one, it hit the front rim and the back rim and went in. He looked a little surprised after it went in too.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Front rim.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I think it's also worth mentioning the SGA3. When they're up by three and they go under the screen and he's just like, you motherfucker. I'm the MVP. You're going to let me shoot this? And that one didn't touch the rim at all. That was pure. And that was a dagger. That was a night-night shot. And one thing I want to say about Jokic, which I was so surprised.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
When he had that offensive rebound, when he tipped it to himself to put it back in, he's like, you motherfuckers can't even hit a shot. I'm going to go down there and do everything. I'm just going to do everything. I'm going to make dinner. I'm going to clean the dishes. I'm going to make dinner. I'm going to clean the dishes. I'm going to put the kids to bed. Oh, you didn't clean up after we ate?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I'll clean up. You just start your dishes flying. exactly what was happening. He's just like, you know what? You're not an asset. The rest of you four are not an asset to me, but don't worry. I got this. And he almost did.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I thought Nick Celtics game four was that was an exciting game.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I'm sorry, but when Westbrook has two air balls and Michael Porter Jr. has two air balls, it's hard for me to talk about the execution.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
One of the things I loved about that Jokic performance was... the 48 hours between game four and game five was turnover to assist ratio. And the worst he's ever shot from the field. It was this kind of like, have the thunder solve the Jokic problem. And you've watched enough Jokic. You're like, okay, guys, we'll see if you've solved it.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
People have been trying to solve the Jokic problem for three years now. Like there, there, you cannot solve the Jokic problem. It's like Matt Damon and good hunting and the chalkboard. It's like, you cannot do it. It's impossible.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Under pressure, yeah.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I think there's a good parallel there between Jokic and Mitchell where it's like, I'm standing on my head here, guys. I'm giving you 40 plus. You know what I mean? Like, Mitchell's hurt. He didn't play great. But remember in the fourth quarter, he had like three straight threes. He's just like, guys, I just need some help. Like, Max Struess, do something.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Like, Michael Porter Jr., I'm not asking you to be superstars.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Do something, guys. You know what I mean? And remember, I'm sure you remember the Celtics series last year was a similar thing with Mitchell. It was just like, again, there's guys out. Garland was out. But it's just hard. These guys need more help. They need more help.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
No, I love Mitchell.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I don't think that's how it works. One of the things I love about Jokic is like my kids don't care about basketball at all. And they come into the room when I'm watching. I'm like, do you see that like slow kind of fat guy? Like that's the best basketball player in the planet.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
He's definitely the best guy. It's like the
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I'm terrified.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
That's a fact that I can't dispute, but I feel really good about the Knicks chances on Friday night. Timothy Chalamet and his girlfriend will not let us lose.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Mismatch tapes Thursday after that Thunder Nuggets game. And Verno has done a really good job of just really entrenching him in this, like the Thunder are too young and they need to go through their playoff scars and they can't, there's no way they can beat the Nuggets. They've been there before, championship pedigree.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And like, he's really, really rooted deep, deep down in this take in a way that I'm scared to do as someone who does this for a living. And I'm really proud of him, but it's going to be a fun pod afterwards because he's either going to be really, really right or really, really wrong.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
No, you and him have something in common. is when you guys are wrong about a take, you go straight into excuse mode. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah. You learn from the master. Yeah, you do this too. It's always, oh, it's because John Moran got hurt. I mean, I didn't know John Moran was going to go down. I didn't know Steph Curry was going to get hurt.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
It's always like, I'm right, but these extraneous circumstances created an environment in which I was wrong. It's not my fault. It's the world's fault.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
They did. It was a good Celtics game. I mean, we'll talk about the basketball stuff in a second, but I... I do want to say, I heard that Chalamet listens to the podcast, and I'm very excited about that. I'm excited that he's supporting the Knicks. Bringing the Kardashian element wasn't my favorite thing to happen in Game 4. Right. Like, I'm just going to say, like,
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I love that you're here, Timothy Chalamet. I love your support of the Knicks. When he went to road games and sat next to Stiller behind the Pistons bench in Detroit, I was like, all right, I love this. You know, and the game day thing that he did.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Yes, I was like, I love this. But it was when you bring a girlfriend that's fine, but your girlfriend's sister, and then it becomes about them and their outfits, and you know it's going to sort of like make the press. I didn't love the Kardashian element that we saw there.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
It's your buddy that has a girlfriend who golfs. You know what I mean? It's like, I'm so excited that your girlfriend golfs. I'm excited that she's going to be joining us, but it's going to change the vibe. That's sort of how I felt about the Kardashians being at the Knicks game.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
It's just like, all right. Yeah. I didn't love the Kardashian of it, but I will say this is... The Celtics made appropriate adjustments and played good basketball tonight. And I love the way that they attacked the paint and just sort of like put the pressure on the Knicks. They did.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I think so, too. And it did help that Derek White hit like seven threes to start the game.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
I will say that there is something to be said for... you drive the car, I'll drive the car, you drive the car, I'll drive the car. But when you have, when you take the Tatum element out of the Celtics offense, it becomes a little bit more like I'm driving the car and I'll dictate how things are going to go. And I'm going to spread the ball around. It's not my turn, your turn, it's my turn.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And then we're going to spread to role players. That's what the Knicks offense is with Brunson sort of at the helm. And I think that is what led to them playing this, this sort of more democratic offense. Yeah. And, you know, it also didn't hurt that Derek White hit all this up.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. Well, they did get Towns into foul trouble. They did not get Towns into foul trouble.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
What are you talking about?
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
The first foul, he was setting a screen. And again, none of these fouls affect the play. None of them do. He's setting a screen, and then it's an illegal screen. It wasn't even around the ball. It wasn't even the point of attack. And the second one, Porzingis is coming across the lane, and he hits him like he's a tight end checking a linebacker. It's like, what are you doing? It's like, again...
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
KP is not a threat. Why are you doing this in the middle of the lane? I don't understand these fouls. Then the third foul, he gets his shot blocked. And then he fouls the guy. By Derek Wade. Yeah, by Derek Wade. Then he grabs Derek Wade and throws him out of the way because he's embarrassed he got his shot blocked.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
So when you say the Celtics put him in foul trouble, I say that is complete bullshit and not true. Carly T. Towns can't help himself, dude. He's got a real mental problem. He's got a mental block with this. And he goes through stretches where it seems like he's figured it out, but he hasn't.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
And I'm going to very quickly give you a quick analogy I gave on the mismatch, which was like, it's like a finance guy going to the strip club and going to the champagne room and getting roofied and spending $20,000 on his credit card and then waking up the next day and realizing it. And then around four o'clock that day, going back to the same strip club the next night.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Like, when are you going to learn, dude? Like, when are you going to learn? If you went back to the strip joint every night. Five nights in a row is what Carlton Towns did tonight.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
If Carlton Towns was getting fouls where he was challenging people that were driving to the basket trying to score at the rim, I would be like, that's fine. But if you look at his fouls tonight, the other one was under the hoop on a rebound. None of these are on-the-ball plays at the rim.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Also, Brunson, and again, I'm a Knicks fan, but I'm objective about basketball. He put his chin on his shoulder. Right. You're putting your chin right there.
The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Luke Kornet Game and Tatum’s Road Back With David Jacoby. Plus, WNBA Commissioner Cathy Engelbert
Oh, I mean, I think the Knicks will win the series, but do you think I'm going to sit here and not be doubtful and terrified of Game 6 with OG playing the way he did tonight? Yeah, what's going on with him? He's been up and down. There was the stretch when Brunson was hurt where Bridges and OG... were phenomenal.