Charlie G.
Appearances
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
What's up, y'all? If I kill myself and find out reincarnation's real, I'm gonna fucking kill myself. You know? I don't know if you guys... I don't know if you guys can tell, but I live in a van, right? And ever since I started living in a van, I came out as a hobosexual, right? Meaning that I sleep with women for their bed, right? I'm always on Tinder trying to find a place to stay.
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
And they always say the same thing, right? They're always like, you just want to fuck me and leave, right? And I always have to go, oh, I'm for sure staying. You know? My kink is shower sex. It is pretty, like, sketchy dating women, like, while living in a van, right? Like, they never want to come back to it until they find out I have a cat, right? And that just flips the script, right?
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
It goes straight to, like, let's go to your van. I want to meet your cat. Right? I guess they figure if... Is there more to that? Yeah. You want to finish it? I guess they figure if I haven't killed the cat yet, you know? Okay. That's it, yeah. Charlie G., ladies and gentlemen.
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
A part-time van liver before? Yeah, well, I lived in an apartment and the van for a minute, for like a year. Exactly.
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
Well, I have the apartment. And then, like, if I wanted to travel for the weekend, like, or for, like, a week, I had, like, no hotel to worry about. I can go anywhere. I lived in, like, New York City at the time. So, like, well, Jersey City. So I would just go.
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
Yeah, I did real estate for everything out of college, and then I hated it, and I lived in a van for all of last year. Started comedy last year. You love it? Yeah, it's great.
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
It's a 2006 Sprinter, so it's not a nice Sprinter. There you go. Good question.
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
I mean, in Austin, I just go back to their place. Like, that homosexual was, like, actually my life.
KILL TONY
#712 - ADAM RAY + RICH VOS
Oh, man. Like, kindergarten, I shit myself. Kindergarten? Yeah.