April
Appearances
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I will say they feed us well. There are break stations on every floor. There's a huge market, a place called the barn. Oh, that sounds nice.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Do the hotel rooms have tissue boxes? There is in the bathroom. I should have thought ahead and brought it over close to me.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Much less editing for you, Mark. Exactly.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Okay, so I am one of four girls, so three sisters. I know my poor dad. Your lucky dad.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
That's right. Girl dads are the best. And he really is the best. So I'm the second in line. And what first caught my attention as a child is that all of my sisters have blonde hair and blue eyes or green eyes. My dad has this bright blonde hair and these really bright blue eyes. My mom, red hair, green eyes. I came out dark, dark head of hair, really dark eyes.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Second born, we can kind of chalk that up to like, okay, there's some genes in there that are going further back. Like it happens.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I thought about all this growing up. There's also the fact that my sisters are all very rambunctious. They love to dance, very social. I was like the anti-social child. Monica, I love to read Harry Potter, kind of off in my corner, very introverted. So just felt very different.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
And then tack onto that throughout our childhood, we would go out to eat at restaurants or even in school, people would ask us how we were related. We had the same last name, obviously they knew we were. When we said sisters, everybody often asked, Are we full blood sisters? This is mid late 90s, early 2000s. So that sort of got me questioning. I do feel different. What's going on here?
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
So I did ask my parents a couple of times. Is there something I need to know? Was always told no. I asked my grandparents. I was always told there was nothing more I needed to know. But I never let this go as a topic. So the running joke in my family to me was that I was the milkman's baby.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Good. You guys have heard the phrase. So fast forward, I've asked this question to my mom, even into my adulthood.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Right. And there's something fun about the mystery of it all. But same answer every time. I have two children. Shout out to Brody and Brynn, their little arm cherries in the making. Oh, we love that. I'm looking at both of them and I'm like, they really look like me and my husband. And they really look like each other.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Biologically speaking, now I can look at my dad and my mom and say, something's not adding up here. So I decide at 30, I'm going to take a DNA test. I don't tell anyone. I get the DNA test. I take it. It comes back several weeks later and there's nothing earth shattering. I get some third, fourth cousins, but there is one person who comes up. He's a first cousin and I don't recognize the name.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
So I messaged the guy and he responds back a couple of days later and he tells me that he's actually adopted. Oh, that's confusing. Not a lot to go on.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I was trying to crack this nut without anyone knowing just so I could have the results myself, but not break open any big secrets of the family. I was trying to be very demure, very mindful. My two younger sisters look just like my dad. Older one looks like my mom. So I talked to my younger sister and she said she's going to take the same DNA test.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
And a few weeks go by and we both get the email and we say, OK, we're going to call each other before we open it. And we opened it. We are half sisters, niece or aunt.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I felt like this is my lifelong mystery solved. I knew that something was up the whole time and I was right. My family is still my family. My mom and dad divorced, by the way, when I was 18. So they're not together anymore. And I think maybe she doesn't know who my dad is, or maybe she's just not 100% sure. And that's why she never wanted to tell me.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
There's some secrets she doesn't want to confess to. But now I have these results. I know for sure there's nothing more to hide. And I want to know who the person could be. So I call her up and I say, mom. Misty and I took a DNA test and guess what? We're half sisters. She really took it like a champ. And she was very matter of fact. She said, okay, his name is Jim.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
He was 10, 12 years older than me. He was going through a divorce. He's got two other kids. I mean, it's just bombshell after bombshell. She knew this guy. They dated for a little bit. But here's the real kicker. She met him because she was working at a pharmacy. And this man drove the Borden's dairy milk truck.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
And that was the part of the conversation that I stopped and I laughed and I said, do you mean to tell me that I really am the milkman's baby?
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
There was a separation. She was only 21 when I was born.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Very young, very much haven't figured out life yet.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
There's a little bit of some drama here. My mom says that he knew, but when I went and talked to him, because really I wanted to thank him for knowing that I wasn't his biologically, but still raising me the same as my sister. never treated me any differently.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
He got really emotional when I had the conversation with him because he said he really didn't know that she had sort of alluded to it once, but then took it back and never brought it up again.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
They were not together when I told them. And I'll tell you, my grandparents are actually who had the hardest time with it because I'm so close to them. And of course, this is my grandpa on my dad who raised me side. He will still find old pictures of distant relative family members that he thinks I resemble. Oh.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
That's okay. I love him. He's my papa, and that'll never change.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I found him. I got to give my younger sister a little surprise. I didn't actually mean to tell her in that way. I just messaged her to ask her. For her dad contact info. And I didn't give her a reason why. And she joked back to me and said, why are you my long lost sister?
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I did get to meet him and kind of hear about his family history and very pleasant guy. But my life worked out the exact way it was supposed to, because he even said he wouldn't have been in a place to be a really great father for me at that time in his life. So it really worked out.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I appreciate that. Now I know there's a history of breast cancer in the family. Never knew that before. So these are good things to know. That's true. Thanks for sharing that.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
Of course. Thank you guys so much for having me. Would it be okay? Can I take a picture of us?
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I am actually at a place called Deloitte University. I'm in learning and development, and I'm actually here all week delivering five different learning programs.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Armchair Anonymous: DNA Testing
I just wrapped up one called Future Forward. It was so fun. Lots of very interesting activities. Lots of conversation about what the future of our workplace looks like and how to be agile and adaptable. All the buzzwords. Deloitte, the big accounting firm? That's right. We have our own hotel slash university. Wow, that's incredible.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
Hi, thanks for having me. Sure, what's up? So I'm wanting to know how I can help my 71-year-old mother who has no retirement. She has a home and she's considering selling the home in order to be able to make it about 50 more years. But she's kind of in a rock and a hard place. And I didn't know if there's a way she can invest a little or find a way to maybe get a little extra money.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
It's probably about $175,000. But then she has to decide whether to rent or to go purchase another smaller home or a trailer. Where does she live? She's in Evansville, and so she's in Indiana.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
Well, she has Social Security, but she's afraid to get a job because then she'll lose her insurance, her Medicare.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
She's only getting $900 a month about right now.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
She is. She's actually pretty stubborn. I love her to death, but she's very independent and a bit stubborn, but I love her. And I keep saying, well, maybe... If you could do this or that, she's kind of very adamant about not being in a community or being somewhere because she's 71 in April, but she thinks she's 50. Yeah, I know that feeling. Yeah.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
She's been a caregiver her whole life, a CNA or an at-home caregiver. She actually left being a CNA to go take care of her mother at the last five years of her life. And that's kind of why she's in this position. Where's your dad? Her dad?
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
Oh, my dad. Unfortunately, my dad is not in the picture. He's
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
Well, then how do you navigate the not having insurance then?
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
Right. Well, she was living off the inheritance or the money that was left to her from her brother when he passed.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Wait for Someone Else To Fix Your Life
It's almost already gone. That's why she's kind of in this position now.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
Well, hello. First of all, I'd like to say thank you so much for having me on your show. I feel truly humbled by it.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
Yeah, thank you. Back before Thanksgiving, I discovered your show and I started listening actively. And I thought, you know, my whole setup of how I did money and business was very much off. And I thought, I've got to start rearranging things and get on the baby step. My husband and I are on the baby steps.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
We secured the first step and we were also getting, um, listening to some of your advice about having all of our accounts merged. So we had put our savings and our checking account together in both names. And my husband had had a separate account, um, that he'd had for probably about 25 years. And I told him, I said, you should really put me on that account.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
This way we can, you know, put some money in that too. And it was a good thing I started listening to your show because it really helped me discover really what was going on. I'd always been pretty active, proactive with my own money as much as I could be, as much as I knew how to be.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
But on the 2nd of December, my husband had called about his other account, which the longest time it had been pretty dormant. I think he had, well, exactly, he had $100.26 in there for the longest time. And the bank had told him that he was overdrawn $3,000. And he, of course, called me immediately and told me, how can this be? I said, you need to call the bank back and ask what's going on here.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
So he called the bank and they had told him that the teller or whatever had given out $3,000 and it got written off his account because his account was one number off from a customer that had it withdrawn from his account, which really made no sense to us. We couldn't understand how.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
But it gets even crazier what we've been going through with it because they said that this had happened back in May of 2024. And here we are in December. And they'd said, well, we closed your account in July, July 8th. And we were like, we never got notice of this. And my husband wasn't as proactive with this other account because he figured, oh, it's there. I don't have to worry about it.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
And I just thought, oh, no. So we got a letter from them, you know, saying even a copy saying we're sorry there was a mistake and even showing us the teller's number and the individual's name of who got the money. But it didn't solve our problem.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
They said the bank then told us they would send us a check for $100.26, which is what my husband had in the account, and he told them, I'm not doing business with you folks because this is nuts.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
But they had put my husband into check systems and also gave him a negative credit report across the board, and we were just like... I can't believe this is happening.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
But, you know, that's not all, though, because we got the check for $100.26. We thought, okay, it's over. We're done. They're going to fix it. That's not what happened. Then, December 19th, they sent us a check for $2,899.74, and we're like, What's going on here? And a paper saying that, you know, you're still in check systems. You can deal with this with them. And we're like, what?
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
So I contacted an attorney. No. Because if you add the $2,899.74 with $100.26, you come to $3,000. So they were still making us look like we had a black eye, my husband.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
We were like, what's going on here?
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
They told us, oh, no, we can come and – we'll even come to your house and pick the check up. I said, I've never heard of stuff like this before.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
No, it's a big bank. Yes. Which we were just shocked by.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
We did, and they did send them a letter, and they said they're still going to clear it with check systems, so we're waiting for that to happen.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
Well, we had moved and we had given our new address, but nothing had ever come here.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
It's like, wow, how did this happen? It sat there for so long.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
Well, I can say I'm just glad that I did tap into your show and got more proactive with checking.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
No, I haven't done that yet. I'm just getting started, like I said, before Thanksgiving. Just discovered your program and just getting started.
The Ramsey Show
Are You Ready To Go Scorched Earth on Your Debt?
Thank you for saying that. You're awesome.