Alessia Cara
Appearances
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I can't believe that like it's out. You know, it's so weird.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I definitely felt that way because I mean, I was a music fan before I was anything else. You know, I loved music genuinely before I even realized I could sing or wanted to sing that. I just loved music so much, you know, and I just wanted to get back to that. So I started just like listening to music as a fan again and just regaining that like innocent, youthful sense of love for it.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And I think that was kind of the catalyst for me, like wanting to to start, you know, treading the waters a little bit and like keep going. Yeah, you just have to sometimes reconnect.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And in order to do that, you have to get away from it, you know, and I think it also kind of like filled the tank with like new experiences to then go and write about, you know, if you don't have any new experiences, where are you going to pull inspiration from if you don't even feel like a person?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Like, where are you going to get the human experience if you're not really living the human experience? You're living in like a bubble, right? So, yeah.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I think it was like, I mean, the first little inklings and like thoughts about it were like late 2021. But I guess I didn't really start writing it officially until like 2022.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I guess it's like a bit of both because when I first finished the album, I wanted to put it out in October of last year. I was pretty set like on that month. And then as it was approaching and I had a couple singles out, I was like, this is going a little fast, you know, because like I said before, I've been sitting on this album for... about three years.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And I feel like in pop music, sometimes like things tend to just be a little bit disposable and they go really, really quick and people just pump stuff out, which I understand the necessity of, I guess, to keep up with the industry. But I was like, I just wanted to give it a little time to breathe. Savor it. Yeah.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And so I was talking to my manager, we were at a restaurant and I was, we were both, we both had that understanding of like, okay, I think we should move this. And then we were looking at, you know, dates in the new year and he was like,
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
what about February and I was like okay and he's like oh my god Valentine's Day and we looked and we were like oh my god and it's on the 14th and there's 14 tracks we were like oh my god this is like destined it was very serendipitous and we we high-fived we're like this is so cool we're very happy about that coincidence so I guess it was like half a choice but also half a you know very uh something we stumbled upon
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I mean, it depends where I'm at in my relationships. Now I'm like, I love it. I mean, it depends. I've always been a romantic, though. Like, even...
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Even on times where I've been single on Valentine's Day, like I just try to surround myself with people I love, like go, you know, hang out with my parents and third wheel them or like, you know, my friends and I, we do like a Galentine's Day, which is always really nice. So I always feel like I have support and love around me on that day.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
But there have been times, trust me, where I have been miserable as well.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Oh, I have a few. I think it's like tied. I'm a physical touch and I believe it's words of affirmation. They're tied for one. And then my second one is quality time. But I would say just opinion-based, not by the test. I would say it's probably physical touch. Like I love a handhold, a hug, a head on shoulder. Like that speaks more than words for me.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
He's taking notes. Yeah, I'm taking notes. Taking notes. I love a card. Honestly, I love a card. Write me a nice long card.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
No, I love. I need you to tell me a million times how you feel about me again and again, what you felt when you first saw me. Oh my God, yes.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
That's... I do remember this. And I remember this because I watched... I mean... You're like, he pronounced my name wrong. I remember it. No, no, no, no. I watched you on the show that you were on. And yeah, so I knew who you were and I thought it was so cool. I was like, oh my God. And it was like really early on in my career too, you know, and I hadn't really met many people.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Totally, 100%, nailed it. Yeah, I really tried to make it as chronological as possible so that if you're listening to it in full, if you're an albums person like me, I love to just listen to whole albums, that it tells a story. And it really is the story of the last two and a half, three years of my life where I did go through that arc.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I started writing this album just in a not great place mentally. Like I said, I had fallen out of love with music. I didn't really know what I wanted to do with myself.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Felt a little lost in my personal life and I just went through the process of learning to harness that feeling of pain and all the, you know, not so great stuff about life and use it to teach me things and reshape it until it looks like something that I can at least tolerate, but at best, you know, make me better and turn into something beautiful. So that's kind of what happened.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I so feel that. I so feel that. I feel like that's the experience of a lot of artists or even just people like in the public, you know, because on one end, like you have to sort of have a level of confidence in order to do this and put yourself out there. Right.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah. Yeah. That's spot on exactly how I felt. And yeah, I think it's interesting because, you know, the things we're taught about love are strange because I think we're taught that it's noble to self-sacrifice and self-abandon in love. Like, you know, you think that's like the most noble thing you can do and the most romantic thing you can do, you know, is make yourself smaller for somebody else.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And while I think, you know, there is a level of compromise that has to happen. And like you said, you know, a level of fighting for something or having difficulties and getting through them. I do think there's a difference between completely forgetting about yourself or completely holding onto an idea of a person or the potential of a person.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I just feel like in my life, I have made myself smaller for people. And I thought that that was like the right thing to do. I thought that's what unconditional love was supposed to be. And then you start to realize maybe that the other person isn't really doing the same and you're giving a lot more. And it's hard to come to terms with that fact that maybe you're just not the right person.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
But then I think something about just like being perceived by people or when you have a lot of like blessings in your life and things that come to you, there is that sense of like, but do I deserve this? Or, you know, I'm an artist because I'm sensitive and I'm sensitive because I'm an artist. And so I think that I juggle between that all the time. I think my default is to
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
You know, maybe we've tried all we can try and maybe I don't like this feeling and maybe this isn't how love is supposed to feel, you know. And I've realized through honestly just growing up and meeting new people that I don't know. That's just not the love that I want. And I don't think that that's the love that we deserve as people.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I think you should, of course, fight for things and there's going to be problems and you're going to have to work through them. But there should never be that feeling of like, I have completely forgotten about myself here or I don't feel seen by you. I don't, you know, I don't. feel like I know you or I even know myself anymore. So yeah, that's kind of just been the compass now.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
When I look at people in my life in different relationships, certainly romantic partnerships, I want to feel like you're expanding me, like I'm seeing new parts of myself I didn't know were there rather than hiding parts of myself or like, having to make myself small so that you can shine. I want you to bring things out of me. And I think that's what real love is supposed to do.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It's supposed to show you yourself. Maybe things that aren't so great, but they teach you things and they help you grow, you know? And I think that's a difference between like good difficulty in relationships versus like the wrong kind of difficulty.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah, for sure. And for me too. And for, I think a lot of people, which is why, you know, it's so good to talk about this stuff because people don't really have a compass because again, like what's taught the biggest like romantic story in the world is Romeo and Juliet. Like I'm going to literally self-sacrifice for you, which is very romantic.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
If I had to pick between which one is more frequent or what the default is, unfortunately, it's like that like imposter syndrome side, you know, just not really feeling, I don't know, like good enough in life. I've always kind of felt that.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And I guess that's different because they both did it for each other. So that's, I guess, sweet. But, you know, like, I just feel like we're just taught this thing, like you said, of like, you have to Fight for it. And I do agree, but I do think there's this side of it that you have to feel loved. And also, there's just a side of it too where it's like, ask yourself, do you even like this person?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Like, if you didn't have any feelings for them at all, like romantically, if you just saw them, would you want to hang out with them? If you were in a room with your friends and you had no feelings for them, would you think, like, I hope so-and-so could be here. Or like, I wish this person was here. And a lot of the times when I ask my friends that, they'll be like, not really, you know? Mm-hmm.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
So it's like, then why do you want to spend your life with that person? What is it about them that you like? Not even like, how do they make you feel? Which is an important question, but like, do you even like them as a person in general, you know? And oftentimes you'll find like, you're just like, what do I like about this person other than what they give me sometimes?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Like that little bit of serotonin that they give me once in a while when they give me attention. Like, what else do I like about them?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
So, you know, when you have it on this scale or you have people constantly telling you like who you are and if you are good enough or not to them, like that really can kind of sometimes get in your head. So I kind of do juggle between. I think I am a lot better at it these days, though. I like try really hard to stay focused.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Totally. That's so true. Yeah. A hundred percent. I totally, totally agree with that. How is your heart? My heart is good. My heart is
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
is really good i feel very happy i feel very very loved in many areas of my life i feel like i just have a lot of great people around me and um yeah just i feel very well supported well protected and i feel good yeah yeah are we in love um yes i am have we is this something that you are keeping private to kind of keep those boundaries like you were talking about earlier or is this something you're like no i want to share this part of my life with my fans
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I've definitely kept it super private. I mean, one for myself, but also because, you know, everyone in my life, like I chose to do this. So like this is like a thing that I'm willing to do every day. But the people in my life have not chosen that. And I don't ever want to throw someone into something that they're not comfortable with. And I'm honestly not comfortable with it either.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
But it's in the music, definitely. I never stop myself from talking about it in music. And my music is very autobiographical. So you're bound to get things, songs that are about, you know, things that are going on in my life. So. Yeah, but I'm happy. I'm very happy.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I guess I just really try to hold on to any sense of normalcy because the second I kind of got launched into this world, I realized it was so far from reality and the reality of my friends and peers in my personal life. And I didn't like that feeling. I wanted to feel like I was a part of my family and a part of my friendships and I can relate to people in my life. And
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah. Yeah, that's that's really challenging. And it was definitely way more challenging back then just because, you know, when you're young, you're like still forming your own opinion of yourself. And like we were talking about, you already have that imposter syndrome. You're already, you know, going there, going up there or going into every day already having those thoughts of am I good enough?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Can I do this? And then when you have like mass amounts of people telling you you're not. It's very hard to compartmentalize that and tell yourself, especially when you're still developing your own brain, that that's not valid or true. You know, you find the truth in that somehow. And yeah, it was really challenging.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And I think that's the one I don't really have regrets, but that is the one regret that I have, especially with like the whole like Grammy moment. That's the one regret that I have is like letting that ruin that for me because it did. It did ruin it for me. Yeah. It was like, it was just a weird time. And I just, I felt the weight of that so hard and I felt guilty.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Like I felt guilt for winning something that I had no control over. I felt bad. I felt guilty.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I know. It really sucked. It really... Yeah, and I think it's also, there was an element of like, almost like I knew it too because I was like on the cover of this like magazine the year before where it was like, you know, they did this thing where it was like potential winners or like breakthrough artists or whatever the year before.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And so I asked to not be submitted the next year because I was like, people are going to say that I'm not new because I was like on the magazine cover last year. And I was like, I don't want that. And there were so many other talented people. I remember being like, I don't want to be submitted. I don't even want this because I feel like people are going to be mad.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And then I got submitted anyway and then I won. And then so there was an element of like, I knew it. And I just let it get to me. And I just wish that I didn't. I wish I just went up there and enjoyed myself and just didn't say anything because I like posted something about it. I felt like I needed to apologize even though I didn't do anything wrong.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
So I decided just early on that I just wanted to maintain any possible sense of normalcy. And so, you know, when I'm not doing this, I just live a very normal, easy, chill life. And I just do regular things. I really didn't stop myself from just going out and doing things. you know, if I got spotted, I got spotted. It's fine. You know, until that just became normal for people.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
You know, so that's, yeah, that's the one regret that I have is not...
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
not taking in that moment because you don't know if you're going to get one of those things again right like that's just such a once in a lifetime thing for so many people I didn't think I'd get it once let alone that ever happening again so I don't know if there will ever be a do-over and so I just wish that I just would have soaked in it are you are you able to appreciate it more now or has it always kind of been or is that memory of that difficult time yeah
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I mean, the honor itself is still incredible, and I try really hard to focus on that. But I think the memories of that time when I look back, rather than being exciting, are kind of sad and are a little tainted. But I try to just focus on the moment before all of that and how good it felt when they said my name for that one second.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah. And they never let you forget it. You'd think that they would let it go. I still get like tweets about it today of like, we'll never forget. Like you took this award from this person. And it's just like, I had no fucking control over it. Yeah. Like I don't know what I did. And it's tricky with that one too. And I find that there's so much discourse on best new artist.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Because the people will say, well, that person's not new, but it's not about being a brand new artist. It's not like this person decided to be an artist yesterday and then they won the award. I think I always thought they should call it like best breakthrough artist, you know, rather than best new artist. That would that would take away a lot of that like discourse. Yeah.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Because everybody who's been nominated has been an artist for decades. years.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah, so it is strange. And it's like, listen, nobody who decided to be an artist the day before or a couple weeks before is going to be at the Grammys. There's so much work that goes into it. You have to be an artist for years. And it's just like, what is classified as like a real artist? Is it when, you know, you make it to top 40?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
So that's why I always thought they should just change it to like best breakthrough. Because it's like, yeah, you've been an artist for a while and you've had a great, you had a big year. This was your year where you broke through and, you know, the general public now knows who you are and
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
celebrates you so yeah it's just interesting it's just so weird all the politics and dynamics of it but i do appreciate it i think more now now that i'm more removed and was that part of maybe the the little hiatus that made you fall out of love with the industry
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
probably contributed to it yeah I wouldn't say it's like in any way directly the reason because I still continued on a couple years after that to tour and you know I was very happy with things after that but um it probably contributed yeah because it's just like it just doesn't make you feel good a lot of this industry doesn't make you feel good I don't think it's meant to like I think they it's like designed to not make you feel good about yourself or something it's very strange um so that you kind of I guess keep going or keep trying to be better
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And I keep a lot of my personal life just off social media. I don't really talk about it. And I think that really just helps me separate, you know, so I can like take off the hat at night and put it back on when I need to, you know, and I'm still very much myself, but I think it's just like keeping certain things away from this is what helps me stay grounded.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I mean, probably not as much as I would like to. I don't really, I talked to like a few artists. I have a few friends who are also artists and I've spoken with them a little bit about it, but I never really had any like mentors going into this or any people that I could really, really bond with. And I think that was just a result of me not
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
really going to many places I don't live in the state so it's just hard to connect with people so I think that was an element to it too where I didn't really have many people to speak to and a few artists did reach out to me that that night and were very kind but you know I've really I've rarely had like in-depth conversations with other with peers and I would like to I just like I think I'm just removed from it a little bit and so it's hard to like connect you know
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It was, oh my God, when was it? A couple nights ago. Wednesday night, right? Yeah.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I mean, both are totally different, and I love both for different reasons. I love the energy of a live crowd. I love the fact that you can redo a take in the studio rather than when you're doing it live, you can't redo anything. A note's going to come out how it's going to come out. You might forget a lyric.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
But I think the adrenaline of that is really fun, and I enjoy the, I don't know, the feeling that that gives me. But I think they're both totally different. There's a side to me that I just love being a writer. I love being like tucked away and, you know, cracking the code of a song is like the most gratifying feeling.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
But then it's just as gratifying to like see the results of that time put in and hear people like singing the words back. It's so cool. So both, I guess.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yes. Yeah. I just announced it yesterday. I'm going on a world tour, my first world tour on my own, which will be so fun. I'm going to like Australia, Asia, North America, Europe. So, so many places I've never been.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I think so. I think more excitement. Yeah. I mean, I'll probably be nervous the first few shows, but then once I get like the set list down and we kind of get it in our bodies, I think we'll be, you know, ready.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I do, I actually have the same one. And it's literally, we just get in a circle, we say like words of wisdom, and then we say, pre-show ritual, because we didn't have a ritual. So we just, first, my first night ever performing, I was like, I don't have a ritual. And they were calling us on stage and I was like, okay, pre-show ritual. And that show went great.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
You know, just reminding myself that I'm a normal person and this is my job. This is a job. And, um, Yeah. Yeah.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And so I'm just a very superstitious person. So now for the last 10 years, that's been my pre-show ritual. I just say pre-show ritual.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Well, it came about and I think 2018 or 2017. Logic and I were on the same label, Def Jam. And he just reached out to me and said, hey, I have this song that I think will be super important. Like, I love your message. I had, you know, released Scars Too Beautiful, which is another kind of socially conscious sort of song. And so he thought I'd be good for it. And I loved it.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I thought it was like really touching and important. And so I wrote my verse and sent it to him. And it kind of took off in a really beautiful, special way. And that song is something that I always hold so dear to me just because of what it's done for people. And I still, you know, get people talking about it today.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And it means a lot to have just been a small part of that song because I think it's super necessary to have those discussions because it's such a real thing. And it's a huge thing. You know, it's very present in the world. And I just don't know if it always gets talked about because of its subject matter. I understand it's very dark, but I think these conversations are necessary. Yeah.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah, to just let people know they're not alone, even if there's no answer to it. Just that sense of comfort, you know, it's like that we're in the same boat feeling that that in itself is pacifying enough to get someone through something. You don't even need to give them like an answer. It's just like, I'm here with you. I've been there before, you know?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
That was crazy. That was so fun with Khalid, too. That was a really fun day.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yes, he played a solo on one of my songs, which is on Obvious, actually. I heard you singing. I got the exclusive. Um, yeah. So yeah, that's definitely one of my favorites just because of, you know, what it's meant to people, you know? Um, yeah, it's, it's meant a lot to me to see that.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Um, I mean, there's so many, John Mayer honestly was on my bucket list for so long. So getting to do this song with him was like, yeah, Such a dream. And I was in the studio with him, too, which I don't get to do very often. I don't you know, a lot of the times in this modern world, you kind of like will send a verse back or you kind of work remotely.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I was. Yeah, I was in school. I was in high school while secretly working on this album. I would like felt like a kind of like Clark Kent Superman thing after school.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
But getting to watch him in the studio, like kind of figure out the puzzle pieces of that solo was so cool. And he's incredible. So that was a dream. But there's so many others. I mean, I love.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
For sure. Yeah, yeah. He's been really, really cool to me. And I've gathered so many little like gems through our conversations about songwriting and about music that I've taken with me. You know, he was like the first and only person who said, you know, like, Just like tell the story, say the thing.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Don't try to impress yourself as a writer, which is so interesting because I do feel like when you're a writer, you try to say the thing in the most interesting way. And like, how can I be different? And you tend to overcomplicate things. And him just saying, just say the thing, say, or I don't know if that's exactly how he said it. I'm probably butchering his beautiful words, but.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah, he was like, just don't try to impress yourself, you know, just say it as it is. And oftentimes the simplest thing will be the thing that hits the most. And I always take that with me. And it's so true. Like, that's the stuff, the lyric that you think is like a throwaway or like, oh, maybe that's too simple.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It's always the one that like gets to people in the core, you know, because you're talking, you're speaking universally. You're not just like trying to do a magic trick, you know, with your words, you know.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
math or writing art yeah yeah exactly I was like and I was so shy to tell anyone so I barely told anybody at my school that I was doing this but like after school I would go to the studio I'd have my dad drive me to the studio in the city and I'd go in with my backpack still on sometimes my uniform still on and I would you know be learning how to make these songs with these collaborators you know and just figuring out how to be in a studio for the first time and crafting you know what eventually became the first album which I had no idea would become the first album but
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I think it changes. I do love this song called Fire. That's one of my favorites. It's one of those songs that just fell out of all of us. We put a mic in the middle of the room. It was John Levine, Jake Torrey, and I on a few different instruments. I had a mic and we just looped this same few chords over and over again until the song just came out.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
There's like an hour recording somewhere of this time. But yeah, it was one of those songs that just came out and it was like strictly intuitive, nothing analytical about it. And I think that's why it just feels really special. So every time I listen to it, it just, I don't know, it just feels like it comes from a different place inside me.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I don't know how to explain it, but yeah, I love that song.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
In Canada? Yeah, Canada. So I didn't get to meet RuPaul, which was so sad, but I got to meet some incredible, incredible drag queens.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah. I love Love is Blind. I haven't watched The Bachelor or Bachelorette in quite a long time, but Around Your Era, I watched it, loved it.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I think the new season of Love is Blind comes out this weekend. No, I'm so excited. It's the most insane show ever. I love it, though. I'm trying to get into Housewives. I've never seen Housewives before. So I am like fully blank slate. Salt Lake City. Salt Lake City. That's what everybody says.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Okay, then I must start with her favorite. You have to. What else do I watch? Just like a ton of reality TV. I'm trying to think of other ones. I'm blanking on everything.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I don't know about that. I mean, hey, maybe. I feel like you can definitely connect with someone spiritually, emotionally. But let's be real. I think attraction has to play a role, right? Right? I don't know. Even just chemistry. Through a wall, you can't feel that chemistry. I don't know. Someone's smile, the way someone looks at you. Those little nuances are important, I think.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah. Like it's the Mary thing that getting engaged before you see each other is crazy. I totally get like, that would be cool to be like, Hey, can you be, you want to be my girlfriend? Cool. Like that would be sick. Cause then there's no date. Yeah. It's like the, I'm in love with you. You're the love of my life. Marry me without seeing them. And it's like only been two weeks or something. Right.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I would so run 100%. I would have done the same.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I totally, yeah. And I just feel like, can you even really get super, super real if there's cameras? Well, I guess you can attest to it. If like, are you able to even really let go when there's like a crew? Because I imagine there's a crew of people there, no?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Oh, my God. Certainly nothing with, I would never do a dating show ever in a million years. I would love, I mean, I've always loved Survivor, but I don't think I would make it. But I low-key would love to do Survivor. Just, like, be on it. I'm going to do those games. I just don't feel like I have it in me to be, like, deceitful.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah, that's kind of how it started. And then I found myself in this like fork in the road when it was time to graduate of like, OK, do I try to take this album that I've made to like labels and try to get a manager and try to get signed? Or do I go to university or college? You know, like, what do I do?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I feel like I would just spill the beans. I wouldn't be, I don't have that in me. Like, I found a shield. Sorry. Yeah, I don't know if I could do it, but I would love to do, like, Survivor.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Oh, I saw one. I saw the first episode recently.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah, like you have it. Yeah, because then I feel like I'd psych myself out. Like, why are you so good at this? And then, you know, I don't know. I don't know if I could do it, but that would be kind of fun to attempt. But I feel like I get fooled by everyone. I'd be like easily convinced, I feel. Or I'd be the opposite where I think everybody's lying to me. So it'd be tough.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
But I did see the first episode of season one. I started fresh. It's really cool.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Oh yeah, true, true, true. You're not into like the, you wouldn't like catch a fish in the ocean and eat it to get over your little campfire.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I feel you. I actually, yeah. I never really thought about that, but I think I agree with you. Food is a love language. Yeah. It is.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Not quite yet. I think in a couple months. In a couple months. Wow. April, I think. March or April? That's soon. Do you have plans to celebrate that? I mean, I think I'm just going to be on tour. So I'll probably just be celebrating with the new album and maybe playing a couple songs from that record, which would be really cool. I haven't thought about it in detail yet.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I just can't believe it's coming up. And it's coming so fast. That is crazy.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And then I made a promise to my parents that if they let me take a year off before I go to college, if I get signed or if something happens in that year. Wow. What a deal. Yeah. So that was the deal. And thankfully, I ended up getting signed like right before that year like ended. It was perfect timing. So it worked out.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It's a bit of both. It's interesting because I'll come across an old interview or even just some of that old music. And so much of that DNA is still in me. I recognize who I'm looking at and who I'm hearing. And there's still things that I've taken with me, just like my general personality. The default mechanisms that I have are still the same. I think I'm just better at dealing with them.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I have more tools to figure out how to navigate them. But there's also this other side to it where I'm just like, who? is this person. Even down to the way that I would talk, I feel like I had this weird Toronto accent happening that I don't have anymore. I'm like, why did I talk? I used to talk like that.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I guess I've just spent so much time all over that I've lost it, but it's just so interesting. It's like you feel like you're looking at somebody else. And some of those songs, too, like, you know, of course, like, you cringe a little bit. Because imagine, like, you know those videos that a lot of us made of, like, ourselves singing? No, I can't. Picture that, but, like, that's your career.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I can't. And it's out in the public forever. It's really bad. That's how I feel. Like, a lot of my trial, like, my putting up a video, you know, for the world is, like, on an album. And the way my voice sounded is, like, plastered there forever.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah. I'm sure. Yeah. Cause reality TV is like, Yeah, I guess it's like you're literally putting all of you out there. I guess with my first album, it's like, you know, a portion of things and it's more tailored and there's more time and thought put in, but I imagine like- Also, you were in like your thirties.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
That's true. Yeah. I don't think it was embarrassing.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I can imagine. Yeah. It's like, I would not, if there were cameras on me during some of my most like
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
down bad times like i wouldn't want to watch that back i i get it it's like there's this moment captured where now you can look back with 2020 eyes and be like i just so don't agree with that anymore but it's like they're encapsulated forever yeah it's strange i mean music must in some its own way be feel that yeah feel that vulnerability probably in like a microcosmic way i like i feel what you're saying yeah because you're just some stuff you just don't identify with anymore like you're writing songs about people about how like i'm so in love with you or like i need you and you're just like
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
No, that's not how I feel anymore. But that's like moment lives there forever. But at least you can look back and think like you didn't manipulate anyone. You weren't a bad person. You just simply were being yourself and were being open and vulnerable and honest. And you can't be mad about that, you know? You're just like, yeah, I can.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Oh, you've never seen it? Never seen it. Why would you want to? Right.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Um, no, I really, I love, I love visuals. I feel like they've always been such an important and integral part of my music just cause I grew up loving, you know, MTV and, you know, the Canadian version, much music. Hey, shout out much music. Um, you know, like I just grew up loving music videos and loving visuals and, you know, sifting through album booklets and looking at all the photos.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I think it was definitely coming from me. I come from a very blue-collar Italian family. You know, the music industry was not really something in... We weren't in that orbit, like, at all. I have, like, an aunt who sings, and she's wonderful. And, you know, my grandfather plays music and things like that. But, you know, it's not... Nothing like this. We had never, you know...
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It was something I loved. And I know that there are still people out there who love that and like love to indulge in that. So I like to give that to them and Just even for myself, I love building worlds around sounds. Even if, you know, music videos nowadays are slowly becoming a bit more obsolete. Like you said, I do think they are coming back now with like so much social media.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
People are always looking for a visual, even though maybe those visuals are a lot more quick, not maybe three minutes long. And maybe now they're more visualizers as they call them now. But I do love, I just love visuals. I think they're important.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Hmm. There's a few things. Honestly, it's truly as simple as just like walking around my neighborhood, going to the same coffee shop every day.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
An oat milk latte, an iced oat milk latte, no matter what the weather. Iced. Iced oat milk latte.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Oh my God. Isn't that terrible? You can feel it going down your chest when it's like- I'll be like sweating.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
No, I'm the complete opposite. But yeah, like I've always had that dream of like going into a coffee shop and them knowing my name and knowing my order and that sense of normalcy. And knowing it because of you coming in, not because you are who you are. Yeah, exactly. Like knowing it because I go in and knowing my order.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Because I'm there and I'm living, you know, a similar day every day and I'm waking up in the same bed. Like those little moments, that sense of stability and normalcy really, really helped me in my life. And I love that. It just feels like home. And now I have a sense of home to go back to.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And that routine, you know, walking my dog, things like that just really, really are so crucial and helpful just in my like psyche and my ability to feel good about things and feel relaxed and comfortable, you know?
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
seen anything like this so I think for them they were a bit confused by the idea of me wanting to do this as a full-time job and I think admittedly they were a little scared of course as any parent would be so um they were trying their best to be supportive but also make sure that I have some sort of plan b which is where the one you're thinking yeah
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
That's so cool. Oh my gosh. Well, I'm honored to be your first, your first onstage moment.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
great or you know right but maybe on the side yeah what classes are you taking exactly yeah 100% it was definitely that and it was like you said totally out of love totally out of the you know just desire for me to have security and and safety in my life and just to make sure that I am not going to be just left stranded um and I totally get that um but yeah I've had those conversations too with so many family members of like you know maybe you should look into being a doctor or being a
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
a teacher and then doing music on the side. And I understand both sides. I think it's important to fuel your kids and make sure that you teach them that life is so big and that they can do anything. But I guess it is important to teach them other things too and give them a sense of security. It's a hard balance. I don't know what I would do as a parent if my kids said that.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
If I was in their position and my kids said that, I don't know if I would have... I don't know what I would have done. I think I probably would have been like, yeah, because I'm a little delusional. But I don't know. It's tough. But they were super supportive. And then once they saw that I had a management team and then I got signed in this room, actually, which is so crazy. Really? Yeah. Wow.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Crazy. How old were you? I was, I think, on my 18th birthday, I think I signed the papers or something like that. I don't remember exactly.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
No, I don't think so. I think I was just, I think maybe we went out for dinner like with my family and we just like celebrated that way. I think, I can't, honestly can't remember. It was like 10 years ago now. And it was all, that time in my life was such a blur, but.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
For sure. Yeah, it's like New Year's, like when you count down and you're like, happy New Year. And then after that, you're like, okay, it's New Year now. We gotta do stuff. Yeah, that's how I felt with that too. I was like, okay, what does this mean? And again, like I was so far removed from this. I had no idea what even being signed meant. I just know that that's the thing you want.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
You know, as an artist, you want to do that so you can have support and, you know, you do the stuff. So I had no idea. I was still a teenager. I had no clue what was coming. And Yeah, we just kind of, I started like dipping my toe into it and we put out the song here, which is my first song on SoundCloud, just to like see what would happen, test the waters.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Yeah. Because I think the team was like, this is a great song, but it's like they didn't know if it was the right direction. I was very adamant that it was because I was like, this is just such a cool song. And I think everybody was like, but I don't know. So I was like, OK, let's compromise. Let's just put it on SoundCloud. No pressure and just see what happens. And they're like, OK.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It was so bittersweet because I think on one end it was extremely exciting. It was like everything I ever wanted. You know, I was doing all these things that I dreamt of my whole life. Then there's this other side to it where, you know, when it becomes reality, it can be very overwhelming, especially emotionally. being like a young girl or just a young person. It was like a lot.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
My whole life was completely different, you know, going from like having a life where I was just going from school to home, home to school. That was my life. To like traveling all over the world, different hotel room every day, being away from my friends and family, being recognized on the street, like things like that. You know, your whole life is different.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It was very challenging, but also exciting. So it was like I was trying to balance both things of being grateful and excited, but also being like, okay, whoa, what is this? Yeah. That's tough.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
Well, in terms of if I felt that pressure, for sure. I mean, there's pressure now. I put the album out and they're already like, all right, when's the next one? I'm like, guys, wow. It hasn't even been 24 hours. I think they are partly joking, but partly not. But yeah, I mean, there's always that pressure.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And that's I mean, pressure is good because it means that there's people waiting and they're excited. So that's wonderful. But yeah. I think in terms of why I wanted to sort of lay low and take a little break was because, you know, at the time it had been like seven or eight years that I've been doing this nonstop. And I think because of that, like music was just like my top priority.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And I was neglecting a lot of areas of my life that I think I wanted to nourish and nurture a little bit, like just my friendships, my milestones that I missed of my family members and friends. you know, just personal things like just my mental health and just feeling like a like a person, like a normal person.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I'm very excited. I'm super nervous too because it's been so long since I've released an album. But I'm just mostly excited because I've been sitting on this stuff for so long. So it feels really good to just finally have it out. And like I've been checking social media and like seeing people talking about songs that were like a secret for so long and hearing them hear it is like such a trip.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I just miss like walking to get a coffee and walking my dog and like doing regular things. I know that sounds kind of cheesy and weird, but it's the truth. Like those things really valid. They really fuel you and they make you feel better, you know, when you need that. So I just was missing that. And I just kind of developed a little bit of resentment, I think, for the industry.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
And I just was like, what do I want to say? Do I even want to say anything else? Do I want to be here? I had to just reshape like how I felt about myself as an artist and where I wanted to go, if I even wanted to continue or not. And I had to just find it again on my own terms, I think.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I think so, yeah. For a little bit, I was like, I don't know if I want to keep doing this anymore for a few different reasons. That was just an internal conversation that I was having. Yeah. I don't know why. I don't know exactly what it was. I think I fell out of love with it for a second. Not so much music, but the industry itself. Because it's so ever-changing. It's so challenging.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
There's a lot of things that are difficult about it. And I just felt for a while, like, is the juice worth the squeeze here? What's the purpose in it? So I had to just find that and rediscover my love for music and why I started in the first place. And I had to start it on my own terms, not because I felt the pressure to or because I felt like it's what I had to do. I just...
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
A little bit. And I've thought about that now, too, because I don't, you know, this I don't think will be forever. You know, careers have peaks and valleys. It's bold of me to assume that I'll still be, like, doing this at, you know, any sort of level forever. So I have thought about that. I mean, I would love to...
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
It's hard because this is kind of the same industry, but I've always wanted to do acting or like at least like maybe write for like TV or movies or do like screenplays and stuff. But I guess it's still in the same industry. So I don't know. But that would be really fun. It's hard when you've been in the public to do something that's not in the public.
The Viall Files
E887 Going Deeper with Alessia Cara
I feel, you know, if I just went to go work somewhere else, it's strange. I don't know if I work at the bank. Yeah, it'd be weird. But I would love to do like I would love to write something.