Your World Within Podcast by Eddie Pinero
Step Into the Arena: Don't be tricked by Comfort and Complacency
Mon, 03 Feb 2025
Most people don’t truly win or lose—they simply watch from the sidelines, afraid to step into the fight. Inspired by Teddy Roosevelt’s Man in the Arena speech, this episode explores how too many of us trade victory and defeat for the comfort of playing it safe. We avoid risk, critique from a distance, and settle for a life that feels secure but ultimately lacks meaning. But what if avoiding failure also means avoiding everything that makes life worth living? True growth requires stepping beyond comfort, embracing both triumph and setback. The choice isn’t between winning and losing—it’s between fully living or merely existing. Monday Motivation Newsletter: https://www.eddiepinero.com/newsletter Free Ebook: www.eddiepinero.com/ebook YouTube: www.eddiepinero.com/youtube
Chapter 1: What does it mean to live in the arena?
Most people experience neither victory nor defeat. Why? Well, rather than step out their front door and shape their world and their reality, most people sit back and they observe and they criticize and they condemn those who actually do. This is the central premise to Teddy Roosevelt's Man in the Arena speech, which I've talked about and explored a few times on this podcast.
Chapter 2: Why is comfort a barrier to growth?
But I had the pleasure last week of sort of rediscovering it in Sedona. And what stood out to me particularly was just the idea of how okay we are with that middle ground of giving up the highs. to not experience the lows, how okay we are with being the ones who merely observe and critique while life around us is shaped. It's like no defeat. No, that's avoided at all costs.
We want safety, safety, safety, which means almost definitionally no victory. And when we skip those two things, what we are left with is empty space. A perpetual purgatory to which most of us are confined. Someone I respect once told me, it's okay to be hated. And it's certainly okay to be loved. But what you don't want to be is simply tolerated, right? Merely existing is for cowards.
Chapter 3: How can we embrace risk for a meaningful life?
And you might be asking, well, what does that mean for me in my world? And that's the beauty of it. I could never answer that for you. You are the only person that can answer it for you. But what I can tell you is that the highs in life make it worth living. I can also tell you that you don't get highs without lows.
And so to avoid life's turbulence because you're scared of the risk or you're scared of the criticism is to deprive yourself of life's beauty. Now, am I perfect at this? No, no, no, I don't think anybody is. And that's the beauty of it, right? That's why I surround myself with people to help push me along because every chapter of life demands a new level of courage, new risks.
You don't even realize that you've moved up to the cheap seats and you need to step back onto the floor. And it's also, funny enough, easy to see in others or easier than it is to point out in your friends than it is to point out in yourself. I talked to a friend recently who was talking about a business idea and just going through everything that can go wrong. What if I fail? What if this?
What if that? And they're genuine. They are reasonable concerns, right? But I just sort of posed this question to him. Like, well, what if everything goes right? Think about the upside. Are you thinking about what that could do for you and your family? Are you thinking about the impact? Are you thinking about the financial upside? Are you thinking about that stuff? Because that's transformative.
And you could just sort of see behind his eyes that switch. Sometimes we just need that nudge. That reminder that says, hey, you're strong enough to be in the arena, making change in your life, taking on the risk, taking on the burdens, stepping into the chaos of life so that you can make something of it. You can do that. Well, Eddie, how do I figure it out?
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Chapter 4: What role does awareness play in personal growth?
Again, this is a work in progress, my friends, and I don't think that ever changes. But I can say personally, awareness. Awareness is the key. Awareness is everything. Understanding that it often does not come natural to go where you most need to go. It requires courage and discipline.
I've invested heavily in multiple masterminds, engaged in very intentional conversations, spending every day in some type of contemplation, thinking about that next step, looking for the right risks. Because I know that when one stays too long where they are, they do themselves, their loved ones, and the world a disservice. When you stay the same, no one wins. But when you're aware...
everything of value starts to rise, starts to emerge. What is it in your soul that you know you need to do? Where is it in your soul that you know you need to go? Because once you've aligned with that. You get to go out, step into the world and begin the process of falling and failing and making your mistakes. But in doing so, there's a few things that are happening at once.
First, you're incrementally moving towards meaning in your life. It's been said that progress equals happiness, and I subscribe to that. I believe in that 100%. I also believe in the second thing, which is that you convince yourself that when you fall, you can handle it. You can get back up stronger. It's the mantra that confidence is earned. You're proving to yourself who you are.
You're showing yourself. You're watching yourself grow. grow as you take on combatants in the arena that you stepped into. I'm a firm believer that a life of meaning isn't avoiding chaos, but rather knowing you can endure and persevere through it. So I'm going to say it again, and hopefully it hits you the same way that it hit me.
Most men live their entire lives without knowing either victory or defeat. Never defeat because they shied away, because they were scared, because the risks seemed too big. Therefore, never victory because the victory requires the defeat. And so this is your opportunity to step out into the world and make your mistakes.
To dispel the notion or any idea that a safe, peaceful existence is a victorious one. You will fall. Repeatedly. But the beauty is, you will do so on your ascent to a world above the clouds. When the ground beneath us shakes, we crave stability. When the heavens open up and rain pours down and we run for shelter,
When life presents us with vagueness, with flashes of possibility, we long for mastery. It's more instinct than anything else. But could it be that that instinct, that we run to like moths to a flame, is leading us astray? That it doesn't have our best interests at heart?
Could it be that we're so worried about protecting and maintaining an acceptable image for the world that we forget to build something internally that's worth protecting? What if that shaking is what brings down the foundations that held us back? What if that rain washes away the limits of yesterday as we evolve into something more?
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Chapter 5: How to shift your mindset from selling to buying your value?
But a simple, hey, X is happening, going to be incredible, give me a shout, we'll see how we can get you involved, gets responded to way more often. Why? Because you're not selling, you're buying, right? People want to be around those who live with conviction, who have value to add. So make that clear, right?
Instead of writing up those four-paragraph emails asking the world for answers, for assistance. You weren't put here to wait for permission, to tiptoe through life and not make any mistakes. You weren't put here to impress others or be accepted by those around you.
You're here to live life on your terms, to make magic, to enjoy the passing moments with the ones you love spent how you choose to spend them. Never forget how much you mean and how valuable you are. Never forget that you have every right to wake up and say yes. I get to get out of bed today. I get to chase my dream and bring along with me the people and things that are worthy of the pursuit.
That's not arrogance. That's confidence. That's not existing. That's living. In a world of conformity, of please take what I have to offer, in a world of concession, in a world of I don't want to but okay, you have to get to the yes. You have to become the buyer, not only in each specific exchange, but the buyer of a destiny that belongs to you. A word we throw around all the time is difficult.
How difficult will the journey be? How hard is it going to be to succeed? This is more or less asking, is a desirable outcome likely? We're asking if it's worth our time, right? If something's difficult, we associate that with a low probability of success. But that's not the right way of looking at it. If you want something enough, difficult becomes your best friend. It's your greatest asset.
And this is, one, because of the growth that comes with it, but two, because very few people are willing to chase it down. The reality is, most people are average. And that's just looking at the definition of the word. Right? If everyone was great, greatness wouldn't mean anything. There's something special about it. It's unique. It sets people apart.
We generally live amongst people, places, and expectations that make up everything we know. That's our normal, that's our box. But what's particularly interesting is that the people we celebrate, the accomplishments we admire, they go far beyond this sort of confined view of the world. So where is the line? Something's weird, it's abnormal, it's looked down upon until suddenly it's not.
You snap your finger and it's cherished. That guitar player practicing 15 hours a day, it's lame. They don't have a real job. They're not contributing anything to society. And then he or she puts out an album that revolutionizes music and they're a hero. The whole thought process is counterintuitive. And that's why the words difficult and great are so closely related.
Not because it's physically stressful, but because great comes with a hefty mental price tag. Difficult means you are consistently doing what the average, normal, and unspectacular deem to be too great a sacrifice. They're not asking if it can be done. They're not asking if it's possible.
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Chapter 6: What is the connection between difficulty and greatness?
The only thing worth a second of your time is making sure that every step you take points you in the direction of where you want to be most. Being lost is not about what you don't have. It's about temporarily forgetting what you do have. Forgetting that contained within every dark room is a little light switch that hangs within an arm's reach.
And see, the reason this is so powerful, the reason it's been so important to me, Because every time I'm in a lull or navigating a low point like we all do, I remember something that acts as that hand to pull me back up. I remember that everything I need, I have.
See, I used to use the word stock as to imply immobility, being powerless to the outside world, when in reality, I just had to remind myself that the path to recreation is always in front of me. And the map needed to navigate is always folded up in my back pocket. In essence, what I learned is that helpless is not a situation. Helpless is a decision. And one I'd simply never choose.
Life's challenges They are not a display of your insufficiency. No, they are a reminder of just how powerful you are. If you never let yourself fall, hit a low, or lose your way, you'd never get to see the miracle that is your resiliency. You'd never get to look in the mirror and see the reflection that is the conqueror of worlds and the slayer of dragons.
You'd never get to climb the mountain from which you'd ultimately look down and see a world of your making. There's a saying that will always be true. It will be true on your best days and your worst. It will be true after victory and it will be true after defeat.
It will be true when you have momentum and it will be true when you're down on your luck doing everything in your power to create momentum. That saying is your future begins now. Hey, on the surface, might not seem like much. Sure, my future starts now. I know that. Everyone knows that.
Well, if that's true, if everyone does, in fact, know that, why do we spend so much time stuck, reliving our past, unable to break free? Why do we remain terrified to change? Why do we feel such a connection to who we were, how others saw us? Why must we remain loyal to the character we've been playing in our mental autobiographies? See, here's the thing about the past and the future.
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Chapter 7: How can we redefine our relationship with challenges?
One is fixed, can't be changed. And the other, well, it's waiting for you to tell it what it is. One is expired time. One is plans to be determined. And it's interesting how we continue to conflate the two. Epictetus has said that the more things we value outside of our control, the less control we have.
Well, I'm going to be the messenger here relaying the precious truth that yesterday is in fact out of our control. What can be controlled is where we go from here. The next step. Meaning today is not your failures. It's where you take those lessons. It's not your mistakes. but it's what the stronger you can now endure because of them.
It's not the dreams you let slip away, but where your pursuit might take you now. And yeah, yesterday certainly contributes to your outlook, as all information does. It's value considered, it's impact assessed. It guides you, but it's not you. And that difference is astronomical. There's a question about the role the past plays in our lives. That has to mean something, right?
Your past is, in many ways, your story. It's why you think the way you do. It's contributed to your understanding of the world. It will always be a part of you, and I believe that. But I also believe the past is a story. And just like reading one chapter in a book simply sets the stage for the next one without controlling its direction, so does every day that has led you up to now.
Life gives us the tools to experience, to grow, learn, and then shed that which does not coincide with what's important. Your failures are not you. But they are precious in that they push you towards what you'd like to be. See, you can experience something and not be that thing. As Kierkegaard says, if you label me, you negate me.
If you proclaim me to be X, you're essentially stealing from me the infinite possibility that is the future. Yesterday has nothing to do with what I can become. And so taking it a step further, never mind being labeled by someone else, how could you label yourself and see it as anything but self-sabotage? See, you're never defined by your past, but always learning from it. It's not who you are.
It's the cheat codes for what you can be. Without that winding road of misfortune and mistakes, the incredible expansion we long for doesn't materialize. Imagine if everyone who ever felt down in life, felt like a loser, who temporarily lost hope, imagine if they looked in the mirror and said, okay, this is who I am now.
There would be no triumph in the world because anything meaningful requires the resiliency to map our way from the hell that was our darkest moments to what will become our proudest moments. Destiny, destiny, destiny means that you separate the finite from the infinite. What you used to call yourself has prepared you to move towards the horizon.
But what you used to call yourself is also as irrelevant now as those seconds that you watched tick away. Seconds that maybe you're not proud of. Seconds that perhaps taught you about the world. Seconds that gave you a glimpse of what's possible, unveiled the happiest of times, all of it. In its own unique way, it brought value, but none of it is your future. Why?
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Chapter 8: What does it mean to start anew and find your path?
The obligation to depersonalize the bumps along the road, the people in your way. The chaos, the difficulty, the uncertainty, it's not about you. It's about everyone trying to figure life out. Trying everything and looking everywhere but the road in front of them. Your job is not to leap a mile or change humanity with a single act. No, it's to carry on.
And don't discourage yourself by thinking you owe more than that. Because all you can do in a single moment is not stop. I've always said one of the most beautiful things about victory is that no matter how big...
can be simplified condensed down to those who could have said no but didn't and that when your plan is to show up no matter what you have made yourself elite you've built a template for the results to model to catch up you're there when you win And when you lose, when you're excited and when you feel tired, when you're certain and when you have no clue, you are there. That is your obligation.
And when those steps, when those decisions, when that persistence comes together, they tell a story so incredible that we can't help but stop and admire the result. One decision at a time, without seeing it in the moment, has come to be something larger than life. Saying yes once, it likely doesn't mean much, but saying yes in the face of adversity every day recreates your world.
So stay true to your obligations. Whether you're in the valley of despair, winter, or some other hellscape we refer to as the middle, remember that an ending is not required of you. No, not right now. All that is asked is that you don't stop. That you see hope when so many are unwilling.
That you see the temporary nature of the state you're in and believe with all your heart that you'll emerge victorious. one simple decision at a time remember the little things the ones we all come to appreciate perhaps a little too late that feeling of of comfort our little eyes first understood to be home Those little conversations we still think about, the ones that shaped us.
Those little stretches of time we thought would last forever but, to our surprise, had a final moment written into the story. Oh, those little things. I remember going to a concert in high school. It was at the Orpheum in Boston, Massachusetts. I went with two of my friends. had an amazing time and well, years and years have obviously passed.
And recently I asked myself, what is it I remember about that day? Why is it such a powerful moment for me? And interestingly enough, I don't remember any of the songs that were sung. or how well they were played. I don't remember what I bought or what I wore or what teenage troubles I was going through at the time.
No, years later, I remember how it felt to stand there in the center of that theater. Color of the lights filling up the room, the bass drum resonating in my chest, aligning with my heartbeat, the people I was with. And the funny thing is, 17-year-old me had no clue he was driving into the city for a night he'd remember forever, but not because of the music. No, because of a feeling.
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