From Pelosi initially withholding the articles of impeachment to Mitt Romney’s rank-breaking vote, here’s a look back at the Trump impeachment saga.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Chapter 1: What led to Trump's impeachment?
There's no burglary, there's no break-in, there's no tapes, there's no dress, there's no sex.
It's not a sexy scandal. Russia was sexy. This has no intrigue whatsoever.
Whoa, whoa, whoa. You're saying Trump's impeachment is boring and unsexy? You know, if Trump hears that, it's gonna piss him off, right? He's going to come out like, my impeachment will be the most exciting ever. I'll break into a hotel and best believe I'll jizz all over this dress. Don't make me do it. Don't make me do it.
I'll do it. Trevor, this whole thing has me so mad. Look, if these allegations are true, then our president, and forgive me for using the N-word here, is a complete nincompoop.
Oh, you had me nervous for a second. Uh, yeah, I agree. I agree. I-I think everyone is angry that the president abused his power like this.
Okay, take it easy, Maddow. I'm mad because our dipshit president can't even get impeached right. He's wasting his one impeachment on taking down Joe Biden. Joe Biden will take down Joe Biden. The guy's already gaffed himself out of two elections. Look, when it comes to Biden, all you have to do is just wait it out and he'll go away. You know, he's like a cold or my parole officer.
That guy is so obsessed with me.
Actually, I think that's legal. So wait, Desi, you don't think Trump abused his power?
Well, no, if anything, he didn't abuse it enough. Look, you only get one impeachment. You got to make it count. Presidents used to understand that. Andrew Johnson defied Congress. Richard Nixon had the Saturday Night Massacre. Bill Clinton got a BJ in the Oval Office. Head, mouth candy, the old Pac-Man. Pac-Man? Yeah, you know. OK.
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Chapter 2: What did Trump ask Ukraine?
President Trump now facing two charges as the top Democrats of the key committees stood together to announce it all this morning. Abuse of power and obstruction of Congress.
Democrats have decided to narrow the scope of impeachment to the two articles of impeachment that they believe are the easiest to prove and backed up by the most evidence.
Because we are operating in a universe where Republicans are challenging some of the most basic facts, Democrats want to make this case as airtight as possible.
Yes, only two articles of impeachment, abuse of power and obstruction of Congress, which means the Democrats are showing a lot of restraint because, I mean, let's be honest, Trump has done enough crazy shit to merit 2,000 articles of impeachment.
Yeah, there was obstruction of justice from the Mueller report, using the presidency to enrich his businesses, the porn star payoffs, flag molestation, the time he looked directly into an eclipse, and, of course, having Don Jr. I mean, that's impeachment on its own. So... So, the good news for Trump is that he's only facing two charges.
Although, in a way, that's also kind of sad for him, because Nixon had three articles brought against him, Bill Clinton had four, and Andrew Johnson had 11, which means Trump will have the smallest impeachment of all time. You know that's gonna make him insecure. He's gonna be like, it's not about the size of impeachment. It's about the friction of the conviction.
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Chapter 3: What was the role of the whistleblower?
I agree he did something inappropriate, but I don't agree he did anything akin to treason, bribery, high crimes and misdemeanor. Well, I mean, if you have eight witnesses who say someone left the scene of an accident, why do you need nine? I mean, the question for me was, do I need more evidence? to conclude that the president did what he did. And I concluded, no.
After months of claiming Trump did nothing wrong, many key Republicans have now settled on, look, man, it was bad, but not kick the guy out bad. Yeah. Republicans basically treat Trump like white people treat their dogs, you know? Sure, it tore up all the furniture, pooped on the floor, and bit the neighbor's kid, but who can stay mad at their face? Who can stand mad at their face?
He just wanted a quid pro quo. He wants a quid pro quo. Who wants a quid pro quo? You want a quid pro quo. Today was the final day in the impeachment trial of Donald Jambalaya Trump. And no big surprise, he was acquitted by the Republican-run Senate, which was never in doubt. Yeah, yeah. Don't boo, vote. See, impeachment... It was... it was known. Like, everyone knew where this was going.
This was like a movie where you can guess what was gonna happen without even watching it. You know, like Titanic. Okay, it's a ship that's gonna sink. Or Sophie's Choice. Some lady has to decide which dude she's gonna bone. I get it. I get it. So with the outcome, never in doubt, the only real drama today was whether any Republicans would dare vote against Donald Trump.
And it turns out there was one man with binders full of courage.
Republican Senator Mitt Romney emotionally announced on the Senate floor that he will break ranks and vote to convict and remove President Trump.
The president asked a foreign government to investigate his political rival. The president's purpose was personal and political. Accordingly, the president is guilty of an appalling abuse of public trust. With my vote, I will tell my children and their children that I did my duty to the best of my ability, believing that my country expected it of me.
That is shocking. That is shocking. Who would have thought that the most badass Republican in the Senate would end up being a Mormon dude named Mitts? And I've got to say, Mitt, you proved everyone wrong. The haters said you were as radical as a glass of skim milk, but they were wrong, Mitt. You're whole milk, my man. That's right. Whole milk, fam.
Now, other than Romney, another Republican senator who was considered on the fence was also about Trump, was Susan Collins of Maine, all right? But she decided that we don't need to throw Trump out because she thinks he's already been scared straight.
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