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Chapter 1: What are the latest stock market trends?
Let's check the stock market while people are streaming in here. And Tesla's way up. SPY is up. Looks like things are up. Bitcoin is up. Rumble is up. And NVIDIA is up only a little bit. I thought it would be more. All right. Let's get some comments going and we'll give you the show you damn well deserve. I know you do. Good morning, everybody, and welcome to the highlight of human civilization.
It's called Coffee with Scott Adams, and you've never had a better time. But if you'd like to take this experience up to levels that nobody can even understand with their tiny, shiny human brains, all you need for that is a tech or jealous or Steiner canteen jug or flask or vessel of any kind. Also a cup or mug or a glass. I should read from the top line, maybe not start from the second line.
And join me now for the unparalleled pleasure of the dopamine hit of the day, the thing that makes everything better. It's called the simultaneous sip, and it happens right now. Go. So good. Oh, I see the complaining has started. We got complaining. Complainers. All right. So last I saw, no pope has been selected. Only the black smoke is coming out of the little chimney.
Did you know that they add the chimney just for the picking of the pope? It's not there all the time. So now you know. So black smoke means no pope has been selected yet. Did you all see the meme on the internet of orange smoke coming out of the chimney suggesting that maybe Trump had been picked as the Pope? That's a pretty good meme.
Chapter 2: What is the significance of the new statue in Times Square?
Well, I hadn't mentioned this, but you probably saw the story that there's a very large new statue that's been added to Times Square. And it's a black woman. So I believe the idea was to celebrate black women. And... But here's the problem with the black woman statue. It turns out that, like most things, everything turns political.
And, you know, the Republicans don't see color, at least not in the same way. So I saw some people in the comments this morning calling it the fat lady statue. Yeah. Now, I'm not judging, and I don't do fat shaming because I don't think people are fat because they want to be.
Chapter 3: What are the details of the recent UFO sighting?
But that's as big a fail as you can get if you put up a statue celebrating black women and half of the country calls it the fat lady statue. Oops. Maybe they should have done a little market testing before they went with that model. Anyway, good try. According, apparently there's another UFO sighting, according to the Daily Mail. There was an alien ball that apparently dropped into Columbia.
So they have video of it, you know, traversing the sky. But then they actually captured it. Now they're looking at it. And I don't believe a single part of this story. but it's funny that it even exists. So it's a weird metal sphere, and it's made of three dense layers and has a chip-like core, they say, and 18 tiny microspheres inside. No welds, no seams, and no signs that humans built it.
Chapter 4: How do emotions affect chronic pain management?
It's cold on the outside, but reportedly hot on the inside. How do they know that? I'm not sure. And it may have vaporized water. And it has perfect internal symmetry. And even better, it's allegedly etched with ancient runes. And AI says the message is about unity, energy, and transformation. Do you think AI successfully translated ancient runes from another planet?
Or maybe it's now from another planet. Maybe it's part of that ancient civilization on Earth that's been hiding in the ocean. Anyway, I'm going to put that in the category of I don't believe a single part of it. Well, let's check and see if there's any science that I can debunk. According to Discover, there's a therapy that's targeted at controlling emotions to help ease chronic pain.
So they used a type of therapy on emotions, and they found out that it seems to make a big difference in people's chronic pain. Well, I'm going to give you the hypnotist take on that. It might be that it's exactly what it looks like. That if you get rid of people's emotional pain, it gives them some relief over their physical pain.
Because as I tell you way too often, your brain and your body are really the same thing. You know, we just artificially treat the brain like it's separate because it's in your skull. But it's all kind of one big brain. Your body and your little nugget inside your skull. But... Here's my question as a hypnotist.
Is it possible that what really happened is that they hypnotized some portion of the people they were doing the therapy on? Here's how easy it would be to hypnotize them. We're going to do a thing where we talk to you and it's going to be a bunch of scientists, really smart people, and we're going to see if it eases your pain. That's it.
You could have frauds, you know, just actors coming in wearing like scientific clothes and having glasses and clipboards and stuff. And probably, probably you would have a big impact on the number of people who said, yeah, you know what? that therapy really helped me. My emotions are better and my pain went way down.
So I don't know how you would do this experiment unless you could somehow reduce the accidental hypnosis. And the accidental hypnosis would just be the suggestion that it might work. You know, it's sort of a placebo effect on steroids.
One of the tricks of being a hypnotist is if you want to do it professionally, you need to get an office and wear a suit and you have professional furniture and even put your diploma on the wall. Because if somebody walks into that environment and it looks all professional and somebody spent money on it and there's a diploma, they will get hypnotized much more easily
than if it was just your neighbor Bob. Hey, Bob, I hear you're a hypnotist. Yeah, just sit on this dining room table and I'll hypnotize you. That would still work. If Bob is good at it, that would still work. But we were trained that you should make it look like it'll work because it makes it easier. Here's one. Maybe they could have just asked me and saved a little time.
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Chapter 5: What did the study reveal about curiosity and Alzheimer's?
while women focus more on men's eyes and hair. Now, this again might be exactly true, but I have questions. Question number one, did the women, and they were looking at photos, I believe they were looking at pictures, not actual people. Did the women in the photos, were they all wearing makeup? In other words, were their eyes all tricked out with eye makeup?
Because one of the things I've noticed is that pretty much every woman's eyes look pretty good if they have eye makeup on. I don't even know the words. What are the right words? Eye makeup, fake lashes if you need them, that sort of stuff. So it seems like... It's a little bit unfair because it's unusual to run into anybody whose eyes are special. I've seen it.
My last ex-wife had world-class eyes, the kind that give you 5 million followers on Instagram. But it's unusual. Your average person just has good eyes. Your average woman... just looks great. Their eyes are just perfect. So looking at the eyes doesn't tell you a lot. But here's my speculation. I believe men are trained not to make too much eye contact because it's intimidating. What do you think?
If you're having a conversation with a woman, especially one that you don't know well, would you spend most of your time looking into her eyes? Let's say there wasn't some romantic connection there. Or would you sort of just naturally know that as a male, it's intimidating to do too much eye contact? I look at the mouth. And the reason I look at the mouth is because it's usually moving.
So it's something to look at. And I do make some judgments about the mouth. But some of it is I just don't feel comfortable making too much eye contact because I think the other person would get weirded out by it. Does anybody have that same? Anybody have that experience? I don't know if that's unique to me. All right. So I just put that out there. And women look more at men's eyes and hair.
Now, the other thing is, I don't think they were allowed to look at anything but the face. So that's a little limiting. But yeah, I like looking at mouths. I think there's something to that science. Men tend to look where they're allowed to look. Well, you probably heard that Governor Newsom of California wants to work with Trump to make film great again in California.
So Newsom has floated the idea of a $7.5 billion federal tax credit for filmmakers, to which I ask the following question. Why would filmmakers need an enormous tax credit in order to make films in California? I can only think of one reason. The reason would be that California has high taxes and high problems that they've sort of artificially created.
Just everything's more expensive and the state is just slamming you in every possible way and you gotta watch out for harming the endangered frogs and you gotta make sure you've got DEI covered. Why would the federal government want to cover the mistakes of the state? And then beyond that, if you have to pay for the industry to exist, maybe that industry shouldn't exist.
Maybe that industry should figure out how to make movies more inexpensively. Now, I do know that there are other countries that give big tax breaks. I guess they think they make their money back because there's a lot of activity that goes on.
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Chapter 6: Why are filmmakers seeking federal tax breaks in California?
But I feel like a medical doctor is probably qualified, especially if they're in the Maha camp. So I'm going to be open-minded about that one. The Stanford Review, which I believe is a student publication in Stanford, They did their own research, and they found that China is running this enormous spy operation in Stanford, which suggests it's probably in every major U.S. college institution.
And the way it works is that if you're a Chinese student whose nationality is Chinese, but it's also your... Um, country that you were born in. So not Americans. We're not talking about, um, we're not talking about Asian Americans. We're talking about people who are going to school here and then they're going to go back to China.
Apparently those students, even if they didn't want to be spies, they're forced to be spies. And every single one of them seems to have a handler, according to the Stanford Review. And the handler not only makes sure that they spy... but even directs them into which classes and things they should get involved in.
So the Chinese government would say, all right, for example, I'm just making this up. They'd say, for example, all right, AI is critically important to China's future. So you're going to sign up for the AI class. Well, I don't want to sign up for the AI class. Well, you're going to. You're going to sign up for the AI class. All right. And you're going to tell us everything that you learn.
So don't you assume that this is what's happening in every major college institution? I don't see that there's any way to stop it except for removing all those students. Because the students are guilty, but I would say they're operating under duress. I doubt there's even one student who thinks, oh, I love doing this. This year is fun being a spy.
I'll bet they just want to enjoy the college experience and learn their stuff and go on with their lives. But in any case, they probably pay a lot for their tuition compared to other people. So it's going to be tough to do anything about that.
well did you see the announcement uh from uh omg the o'keefe media group james o'keefe scored another big one and he's got some undercover video of um a very close confidant to prince andrew And the very drunken, close confidant who was actually living with Prince Andrew's ex-wife and raising his kids. He wasn't just close. He was as close as you could get. Like, he was right in the middle of it.
So this is somebody who definitely knows what was up. And according to him, in his drunken... babbling, he said that he confirmed that Prince Andrew was involved with Epstein and having sex with underage females. Now, on one hand, that is a pretty amazing undercover discovery. And On the other hand, it's the only thing about Epstein that I was sure I already knew. Did anybody have that feeling?
Now, just because it wasn't 100% confirmed that Prince Andrew had some sex with at least one person, was it Virginia Joffrey who was making that claim? I forget, who recently passed away. But did you think it was just one?
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Chapter 7: Who is Dr. Casey Means and what is her impact?
So on one hand, an amazing get to get the confirmation. On the other hand, why does all this Epstein seem like we keep getting teased that we're going to hear something new, and it's always something we already knew? Like, when is the first new thing going to be dropped? I don't know. But still, big accomplishment. Congratulations to O'Keefe.
Apparently, the big victory that Trump got over the hoodies, getting them to say that they'll stop attacking shipping in the Red Sea, might be limited in its actual real-world value because the shippers... say, we don't quite trust the Houdis. Now, how many times have I told you that if you want to know what reality is, look at whatever the insurance companies are doing.
And I said to myself, as soon as I heard that the Houdis had claimed that they would stop attacking, I said to myself, but will the insurance companies believe it? Because if the insurance companies don't believe it, The ships are just not going to go there because they can't get insured.
So I don't know if it's strictly because of insurance problems or if the shippers on their own are just saying, well, maybe we'll wait and see on this a little bit. But there should be an advantage. coming up at some point, but it won't be fast. However, it does make it look like Trump got a big victory before he does his Middle East trip, which is upcoming. So politically, terrific.
Practically, I don't know yet. We'll have to wait and see. Well, here's the big good news, if I can call it that. Apparently, the US and the UK are going to announce a trade deal today. It's probably being announced right now. I think it happens right now. And the idea is that we've reached some kind of an agreement.
Now, I guess we didn't have the... It wasn't the hardest of our trade deals because there wasn't that much in dispute. And I don't know the details of it yet. But if both sides are happy... That probably means there's some advantage to the U.S., and that's probably why the stocks are up in part. All right. Just looking at one of your comments here.
So you remember I told you that the most predictable thing is that the press is going to slam Trump on his whole tariff fiasco and the chaos. But as soon as the deals start coming in, oh, here we go. Zero Hedge is reporting that the U.S. is going to cut tariffs on U.K.-made cars. The U.K. makes cars to 10%. And the US, UK deals to cut beef tariffs to close to zero. Beef tariffs?
In which direction? I guess our beef to them. But isn't the problem that they don't like our beef because it has hormones? Well, so the next thing I was going to tell you, I guess that comment got ahead of me a little bit, is that the most predictable thing that's going to happen
is that the Democrat media is going to say, well, we looked at the details of this agreement, and obviously this agreement is not as good as Trump says, and it's not going to help in the real world, and things were going to go that direction anyway, and he's saying it's a big deal, but it's really no big deal. So the first few are going to get poo-pooed by the liberal media, the anti-Trump media.
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Chapter 8: What is the situation with China's spy operations in US colleges?
Now, of course, the Fed is supposed to be famously non-political, but I don't see how he could be because Trump has been on his ass so hard. I feel like I just don't trust him. I just don't trust that his reasoning is without political bias. And that's a problem. Now, you could say that maybe Trump is the one that caused the political bias, but I'm not so sure.
Because there's an anti-Trump sort of bias that's everywhere all the time anyway. So I wonder if Trump had never said a thing to criticize the Fed, would that make the Fed person more MAGA? I don't think so. Would it make the head of the Fed think, I can't go and play company if I help Trump with my rate cuts?
I feel like the social and political pressure on the head of the Fed would sort of cause them to want to be anti-Trump even if they weren't naturally anti-Trump, you know, for their own lifestyle. I would argue that all Trump needs is for those rate cuts to happen before the midterms. And there's plenty of time for that. And I think that they will.
Because if the tariff negotiations go well for the next six months, and especially if we get something happening with China, And all that needs to happen with China is that we agree on a pause while we work on a deal. That could be enough. And a pause on tariffs until we work on a deal. So I feel like Trump is setting up the midterms really well.
There should be a rate cut and there should be a whole bunch of tariff deals done by them. He's going to be hard to beat, or at least the Republicans are going to be hard to beat.
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Well, I was reading a Mario Noffel news summary, which I recommend, by the way. His news summaries are terrific on X. The Doge is... put together some software to make it easier to fire government employees. So you know how everything is too complicated? But apparently it was sort of complicated to just fire anybody. So they figured out how to do a high-speed system for firing federal workers.
Now apparently over 260,000 government employees have already been let go because of Doge's work. Did you know that? That snuck up on me. 260,000 have already been let go. And then this will make it easier. And apparently there's a whole bunch of others who are targeted. So we expect the IRS to cut 40% of its staff and maybe the VA to cut 80,000. And I guess the ultimate source of this is Reuters.
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Chapter 9: What did the O'Keefe Media Group uncover about Prince Andrew?
Now, how do you terminate 522 contracts in the last two days? I have a theory that they did it by the title. Because it would be pretty hard to really dig into all those contracts and talk to all the players, the buyers and the sellers, and to find out if it's appropriate. But here's one that they canceled. One of the contracts included $181,000.
USDA contract for, and this is the title of what the contract is, Technical Climate Advisor for Central Africa. Would you feel that you needed to do a deep dive before you cut that? I wouldn't. I would just look at the title. Do we need a Technical Climate Advisor for Central Africa? No. No? Yeah, that's what I thought. I'm going to go with no.
So it might be entirely possible that you could get rid of 522 contracts just by reading the titles and figuring out how much you laughed. If you laughed uncontrollably at just the title, that should be enough to cut it. I'd be perfectly happy with that standard. Why'd you cut it? We read the title and we couldn't stop laughing. Okay, good enough. That's all the research I need.
Well, the Center Square is reporting that there was a failed vote to try to require voter ID in Michigan. Now, I guess all the Republicans voted to require voter ID, and all the Democrats voted no. So the thing failed. It fell 16 votes short. And my question is this. This is genuine curiosity. So that's going to prevent me from getting Alzheimer's, my curiosity. I'm actually curious about this.
What do the normal Democrats think about this? Because you know the far left, the ones who are really dug in, they're going to be in favor of any crazy thing as long as they can keep power. But if you were just a normal Democrat, not an elected official, and not one of the crazy progressives, just a normal Democrat. Let's take Bill Maher. Take Bill Maher, for example, a normal Democrat.
What's he think about the fact that 100% of the Democrats don't want voter ID? How do you possibly process that other than fraud and wanting to promote fraud? Because there's no normal Democrat who believes that black Americans can't get an ID. We've literally never found even one. So do they just sort of... say to themselves, well, as long as it's defeating the Nazis, it's okay.
And then how normal would you be if you thought you were fighting Nazis? It wouldn't be very normal at all. So does anybody know? I've never asked any normal Democrat that question, but I can't believe that a normal person, no matter what side of the politics they're on, would a normal person think you shouldn't have ID to vote in America? I don't think so, right?
Doesn't it seem to you that the normal ones need to just sort of avoid the question? It's good for their team, so they're probably like, well, I'll worry about other things. So I'd love to see the press talk to normal Republicans, not elected ones, and just say, what do you think about this? Did you know that your team voted 100% to not have good security for elections? What would they say?
Genuinely curious. Here's some good news for America. According to The Hill, Trump signed an executive order on apprenticeships. So apprenticeships were already, I guess we had quite a bit of them, 680,000. He wants to get that up to a million. But there was a bigger thing that was part of the executive order, which might be helpful, is that apparently our...
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