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Chapter 1: Why did Scott Adams miss the last episode?
And at the same time, by terrible luck, I had this severe injury that I didn't know where it came from that affected my left hip so that I couldn't even walk, and it was just screaming pain whenever I walked. So I had two problems at the same time. Either one individually would be like the worst thing that happened to you. But boy, you put them together and that's a bad time.
Now, this was a few weeks ago. Then the other day on Friday, I get that stomach flu back, you know, with all the shakes and aches and pains and everything bad. And my other leg, my other leg got the problem that had now healed from the first time. So how in the world do I get two, probably either coronavirus or virus or norovirus or whatever, it doesn't matter.
How in the world do I get it twice in a row that's combined with the exact entry except it's the other leg? How is that even possible? Well, I finally figured out what it was. The leg problem is because the way I was sleeping. So apparently when I laid on my side, I do something with my leg that puts it in a bad position.
Chapter 2: What happened during Scott's health scare?
So when I wake up, I'm in screaming pain and it takes just hours or sometimes days to get a normal so I can even just walk. So yesterday I couldn't put anything in my body. which meant that I couldn't have coffee or anything else. So I've got a coffee headache, I've got all the symptoms of the flu, and I've got screaming pain in one of my legs. Now when I say screaming, I mean actually literally.
It would have been bad to be my neighbor, because about every hour I'd wake up and scream, ow, ow, ow, with every step. Now, you're saying to yourself, that's really bad. That's really bad. So I'm uncoffeed. I'm sick. And I need a banana. Because I think a banana is the only thing I could possibly get down. Sometimes you just know what you might be able to eat.
And I think if I get the banana, I could get the coffee on top of it maybe, and it wouldn't be so bad. And then I'd at least feel better. And I'm like, all right, I need a banana. So I limped to my kitchen, oh, oh, oh, with every step. And for the one time, this is very rare, I have no bananas. I almost always have a banana. It's like my most basic thing I keep.
So I go to order one to be delivered. Not one, you know, a bunch of bananas. So I get on Amazon to get my banana. Because I'm so out of it that I couldn't tell the difference between Amazon and DoorDash. I confused them because they both bring groceries to me. But I forgot that Amazon is the one that brings it to you the next day. No, I needed it right away. I need that banana.
I really need a banana. I get on Amazon. I'm like, oh, man, I have the interface. Wait. And I put some stuff in a basket and then it disappears. And I'm in some other mode because I guess Amazon has more than one way to buy groceries. And it somehow can mix up the two ways. So every time I would add something and then I think I was done, I'd be ready to send. There would be no send button.
There was no buy button. And then I'd end up in some other mode. So I think Amazon has at least three different ways to buy groceries. So I couldn't figure it out, but I finally figured it out and put in the order. And then it tells me it's going to be there tomorrow. And I'm like, what? Oh, I'm on Amazon. I need DoorDash. So I'd already ordered it.
So now I've got a bunch of stuff coming that I don't need. That should be sometime today. So I go back to DoorDash. I go, all right. And I try to order bananas. And then something went wrong because my brain wasn't working again. But I successfully put it in the order. And I have to wait a few hours. I'm like, oh, if only that banana would come.
Everything would start getting better if I could get the banana. I just need one banana. That's all I need. Finally. DoorDash comes. He delivers my bananas. Except apparently I had somehow ordered one banana. That's right. Now I know the difference between a bunch and a single banana, and I was pretty sure I hit the bunch, but apparently I hit the single banana.
So I got one banana, which would have been enough, except it was green. So that's like no banana. So I said, damn it, I am not going to be beaten. So I suffer through trying to figure out how to order properly again, second DoorDash right after the first one. And finally, I'm happy to report that after all that banana business, I finally got a nice bunch of bananas. They were all green.
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