Sharna Burgess
Appearances
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
They've all just saved up over the years of Christmas money and gift cards. And admittedly, some of the sums that they get given for the tooth fairy are well beyond what the tooth fairy delivered for me.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Girl, I don't even know. Listen, I got a $2 coin when it was the tooth fairy for me in Australia with those little gold coins. But when they lost their first tooth, I wasn't present for this. It was a $100 note. A hundred dollars.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
All of them. Let's go do it. We'll get veneers afterwards. Like it was, but, and I, we had a conversation about that. I was like, baby, it cannot be this. This is crazy. The expectation on that. And he was like, no, it's just the first one. Cause it's such a magical thing. And then it's $5 a tooth after that. I'm like, oh, okay.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I know. But yeah, so they actually are very good at saving money and not spending theirs and getting us to spend ours. How did that happen? I think because the lesson has not been taught yet of, all right, if you want this, then you get to spend your own money for it. And I don't think either of us actually realized how much money they had saved up. So it would just... They took it seriously.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
So now we do, if we go to Target, we go to anywhere, if anyone wants anything special that is outside the realm of what you need... then that has to come out of their money. And it changes very, very quickly when they realize how much it was. We were in a store with one of my kids the other day. They picked up like three to four things, got to the counter.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And when the bill came through for $200, they were like, huh? And they're like, no, we'll just put three of those things away. Yeah. So they only spent like $50.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Like a thousand dollars. You're like, yeah, sort of.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
A weighted based on what we're earning that month. We make sure that there is obviously more than enough to cover what our monthly expenses are between house expenses, kid expenses, insurances and cars, life expenses like that. You share all of it. Actually cars is individual, but like home bills and also kids stuff is all in there. We share that. And so we just make sure there's enough in there.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Certainly if someone hasn't brought in enough that month, she scales it down. If the other one can pick up the slack on it, but it's a case by case basis because of the way that we work and the industry that we're in. One minute it's flowing and it's massive and it's amazing. And the next minute you're like, I've got to buckle down for six months and it's a little bit tighter.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
So it's really not a set thing every month in the way that it works. We have a conversation if we need to and adjust from there.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
We're thankfully not in that position and thankfully we've had amazing careers that have set us up pretty well. But certainly when, and the way the industry has been recently, when you go for long enough without, those massive checks coming in, you think, oh, how long is this going to last for? Let me look at what we've got. Let me see how long until we start freaking out.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And I've certainly had those moments. Like when I first said no to Dancing with the Stars and then that second year came around where they didn't bring me
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
back I was like wait that's now two years in a row without the TV money let me let me just look because I'm thinking oh we're sweet like I'm gonna get to the end of the year gonna make that money we'll be fine and so I absolutely had to sit with Laurie and look and be like am I good do I need anything am I in freak out mode no you're fine but obviously don't go buy another house or don't go buy three Louis Vuitton handbags like you don't know when the next job is coming in
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
You got to think. What was that? A little over a year ago?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
It was pre-baby. So let's say a little over a year ago. So much life has happened in those four years. So it's, we're still catching up on all those things and conversate. We had a baby a lot quicker than we thought we were going to. I was on birth control at the time and Zane was just meant to be here. It was divine timing and I'm grateful and he's perfect, but we were like, Oh my God.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And so I think because life was just in, in like a tunnel at full speed for a second there, there were some conversations that just got missed and we never had to worry about those things. Cause we'd always been fine. Um, But then, of course, you bring up money and you're like, we've never actually spoken about all of this with each other. It was dance over the subjects with each other.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And it did. It opened it up much more.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I'm so good at dancing, Nicole, that I could just dance right by it and no one would know that we just didn't even think about talking about it. But now it is a conversation because it's accountability and it's transparency. And like I said, I don't want to know everything that he has, but I do want transparency to know what state we're in.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
If I need to help, if you're not good, if you're having a freak out about it, let's talk about it. Let's figure out how we can bring more in together, like whatever that is. But I don't want to be over his books because I feel like I'm not your mom and that's not my job. And I feel like that takes away some of the romance in some way for me because of my parent trauma.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
But we do have better conversations now. And I do think a lot of that opened up because we did the podcast with you. Absolutely. Like when we left it, Brian got all of your books. We have all of them in the house. He was so into it. We constantly send each other all the things like some of the stuff you share on Instagram or money conversations and tips and ideas.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
So it is, we're growing and we're learning.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I'm so excited that you're here. I'm so excited that I'm here too. I loved when you were on Oldish, so getting to hang with you again was a gift.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
We have not. I think we blacked it out. But it's definitely a conversation that we need to have. And I honestly think that even Laurie would take us down that road once we get to planning this wedding and truly setting a date.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Because I know that she's got a lot of clients that have obviously been through divorce and all sorts of things and has seen the horror stories of it when there's not a prenup. But yeah, it's a great idea, but we have not done it yet.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Let's definitely not do it as a podcast. Yeah, totally.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah. It's like this. Oh no, not anymore. I think that it's, there was this belief of, oh, but you're preparing for it to fail. But I, I don't see that now. I don't think of it that way. At least I think protecting yourself is a beautiful thing and knowing that there is security and comfort there in that and that everything is fair and you've made the decisions. I think it's incredibly smart.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah. Car insurance. I don't want to get sick, but just in case it happens, I need to have something in place. Exactly.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I think it needs to be official.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
No, I don't think it is. It's like you said, you have health insurance, you have car insurance.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yes, we are. And so is Oldish too. We're IRL and now Oldish is IRL and People are seeing it on YouTube and they're loving it. It feels so good for people to be able to see the content too. I never realized how important that was. It's not just the conversation. Some people love to watch it. So, yeah, it's super fun. I'm going to invite myself back. You should. We would love to actually.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Date night clauses. Who'd have thought? I love that for people.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah, you are.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
That it is the greatest, best, most enjoyable, beautiful, and also the most excruciating period of your life. It will change you to your core in ways you could never possibly imagine. Suddenly that little one's going to come out of you and you've unlocked a whole world of information that you didn't know you knew. It's like a whole other part of you opens up that always existed.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
It was just waiting forever. like a video game for the next level unlocked. And there you are. And trust your instincts because of all of that. Trust your instincts. Even the parent, the mother's in laws and the, whoever that comes around, you know, that baby on a cellular level, you are connected.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
You just know, even as a new mom where you feel like you are just fumbling the ball all the time and you don't know what's going on, you know, and usually that first instinct that you have is it act on it. Just trust yourself because you're born for it and you created that little life and you know better than anyone what it needs.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Oh, I do totally want to go through this again. This year is crazy, but I'm going to put out there, we've talked about it, that hopefully maybe the end of next year, we're looking at getting pregnant because I'll also be 40. And even though my eggs are fine and whatever, medicine's wonderful, but it's still, I want to be as young as I possibly can be.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
So I'm hoping somewhere near the end of next year, we're looking at getting pregnant. And that's also why the wedding's on hold too, because I don't want to be pregnant and I don't really want to be in the first probably six to nine months postpartum because my body is still stitching itself back together. And hormonally, I'm still trying to find my balance.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
It's so funny. When you reached out to me to be here with you, Brian was like, you're kidding. I literally thought about her this week to bring her back on Oldish because she was so amazing. We would love to have you back.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
So the wedding is probably about two years away, but hopefully there's another little one.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
We've started talking about that stuff, but no, we haven't put anything into action. We also want to pay our own kids. Like the most recent one I sent to Brian, I was like, we absolutely need to make them a part of our companies because then we can go on family vacations and call them retreats. Like, All these bits of information you get to learn now on Instagram. It's amazing.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
But we haven't done that yet. And I think there is that, what is it, up to $12,000 a year you can pay each kid that becomes tax-free. Right? Am I on the right track?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I know.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
That's amazing. Yeah. We've talked about all of that. We honestly just have not made time to sit with both Laurie and us together. I'm coming to you. I think, or maybe we sit with you. Just come hang. You know what I mean? We have the best house. The little one will love it. Yeah. Come hang and we'll set these things up. You guys are all boys, right?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
yeah okay we need some estrogen up in this home yeah we need some girl power for sure which is also what i would be hoping for this next time around honestly i think we'll do gender selection and do ivf because he's five for five on boys and he's really who's gonna take a chance on that not diversifying you know what i mean there's a kid portfolio
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I even, I don't know how much you believe in this stuff, I spoke to a psychic medium and it was the most amazing reading that I had. She's very legit. Some I've had, I'm like, meh. But she was very legit. And I asked her about a second biological baby and she's like, yeah. I said, girl. She said, there's a girl there, but there are boys, as in plural boys. She said, so if you want the girl...
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
You're going to need to go and get her. And I was like, that is what I thought. Yeah. He just makes boys. He just like, he's meant to create the starting line of a football team. You know what I mean? It's crazy.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
But there was, we did not have gender disappointment at all because I was just so excited to be pregnant and bring a little life into this world. But we were going to, do we do a reveal party, a gender reveal? And I was like, why?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
We know what this is. So we just got the email sent and we opened it up near the Christmas tree in our home. And as soon as we opened it up, we were like, yeah, cool. It just went on with that day. Yeah. But I mean, he's the most perfect little boy in the world. And Brian has made some very beautiful kids. I would be super excited to see what a little girl would come out like.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah, right. We haven't even gotten into that. Our wedding is so far away. We're so busy at least for these next 12 months. And what I do know is I want to go big with it. It doesn't mean it's like a castle, but I want to be able to have all the money in the world to do all the things, fly my family from Australia,
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Oh, God. I'll fail all of these. No, you're not. Here we go.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Let's go. I'm already winning.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
No. No. No.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
As in can't pay it or just used all the limit?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
No, yeah.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
For what period of time? Are you talking couldn't pay it off all that month or we're talking like?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Oh no, I like, yeah, I've been in credit card debt for sure.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah, no, I've been fired from a job for sure. I mean, I would consider not being called back for Dancing with the Stars, being fired from a job. But yeah, because they don't bring you back. Even though it's all love, we're fine. There's no drama there. But certainly when I was younger.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
No, I'm judging the one in Australia, not fired from that, still doing that. But as a pro dancer here, but I, when I was living in London, did like temp office work. I am not built for this. And I would like fall asleep because I'm used to being active and moving around. And I didn't keep those jobs for very long. So I was fired.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah, I should have.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
No, I haven't. I've fallen-ish and then caught it before I actually fell for it.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I have not. I know. I know. Oh, that's a fail on my part. And I'm scared. I don't know. I'm scared of it. We should hang.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
We need to hang. And you can help me with that because I've really wanted to. And Laurie's amazing, but she's not necessarily, she has investment people at the firm, but I'd rather sit with you and do it.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Oh yeah.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
No, not solely on my own, but I've certainly been the one calling things out and making choices, but I've always had a lawyer negotiate for me. Okay.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And we're not in that position right now to just blow all of that money on a wedding. So I'd rather wait for us like a year or two for all these jobs that we've got coming up and then be in a place where we go, yeah, let's do the whole thing. So how is the wedding planning going? It's just on hold because we don't have it necessarily set a date.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
But I love what you make. It's what you keep. And then the other one is from my own life lessons is. You have no idea how much convenience costs and add up all the little things and just see, and you'll be surprised. And there's so much more you can cut out than you think.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Subscriptions, yes. I recently, within like the last 12 months, did that and realized that because we're also now merged, we had two Hulu accounts and two Disney and then a family bundle over here. It's like we have like three different signups to so many stupid money being spent.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
But also knowing the things I spend convenience on, like I do and being like, I'm going to just not do that for a while. But I've often gone through my credit cards and been like, yeah, I was not paying attention that month because just looking at it, like, why is it so high?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Even grocery stores, the food that I ends up going to waste because I think I'm going to cook it and then I don't cook it like that is a waste of money. Buy it when we need it type of thing.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And we're also just incredibly happy and busy and in our parenthood era. And it's like, Trying to plan another thing on top of all the things we already planned feels chaotic and feels like another task we're just not prepared for right now. But we have talked about what do we want to do? Is it a big, massive thing or is it small? And I definitely keep going back and forth.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
But what I do know is I want to be able to bring everyone I love from all over the world. And I want it to most likely be a destination thing. And I want it to be not just a one night, but also the week of. I grew up going to these Russian weddings and European weddings, and it's not just the wedding. It's an extravaganza. It's an extravaganza. And I love that.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I love the parties before it because all the guests get to know each other. So by the time the wedding comes around, everyone's mates, everyone's had drinks, everyone's on a really great page with each other. And then you have the after party and then you go home. So we need a big budget for this. We do need a big budget for this wedding rehab. Yeah. Wedding rehab. This is exactly what we need.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I just couldn't stand it. It's wild, right? We knew there was chemistry on the very first date when we sat down and We lost time, right? We spoke for nearly four or five hours and shut down the restaurant and almost missed work. And we did that a few more times before we even kissed. And I remember thinking, God, it feels so fun being around him and talking to him is so easy.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And it's just, it's amazing. And we've had so much life happen in the last four years that we've also discovered we're such a good team. So it's not just all chemistry and fun, but we are really great at keeping each other accountable and grounded and
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
focused we parent well together it really does feel like an amazing match doesn't mean it's all peaches you know what i mean yeah rainbows and butterflies we certainly have our stuff everybody does everybody does but we work through it together which is great
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yes, we have. It's the weirdest thing. Our mutual business manager, he's been with Laurie for 20 plus years. I've been with her since just before I was 30. So almost 10 years. And she said to me one day, she said, I've got a client that I really think you should meet. He's ready to date. And every time I'm with him, I think of you. And every time I'm with you, I think of him.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And it's the weirdest thing. And she's a businessman. She does my taxes and makes sure I don't spend too much money. Help me buy a house. Yeah. She's your kind of lady. She's not a Cupid. And so it was the weirdest request that it was like, how can I not say yes to this? I've totally got to say yes. Cause I was also trying the dating apps and trying the things and it's just horrendous.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Dating in LA is the worst. And so we went on this date and she said to me, she said, it's Brian Austin Green. I was like, okay, cool. Who's that? I had absolutely no idea. Looked him up. Oh, I know that face. And on paper, dating Brian Austin Green could have been very complicated. Everything he was going through, he's already got kids.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I knew I was probably going to be with someone that already had kids.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Because of age. At that point, I knew I wanted someone grown that had experienced life. I didn't want someone younger than me necessarily. And at that point, some people have kids already. So I was already open to it. But on paper, there was already four kids and an ex-wife that was currently going through divorce at the time. So you would think on paper, oh, that's a lot of red flags.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
That's a lot of stuff. Maybe not. But it was the easiest thing I'd ever done. And there's, I don't know what kind of magic that is other than it was just the right energy, the right frequency and something about it just meant to be because it still feels like the easiest thing I've ever done.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I know Lori, right? Wild.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
She reminds me of it every week when we catch up about business things. She'll be in the wedding party for sure. She has to be. She introduced us.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah, she's still our business manager. So she works with both of us.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
It's interesting. She works with us individually, both the same way. And we have our own stuff and things, but we also have our home accounts and our things that are for the both of us that we put into every month. And she puts the same in for us, or she lets us know where we're at, if things need to be adjusted because someone hasn't worked as much or whatever, life is life.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
She's helped me understand taxes and money and being better at being accountable for it. Because before her, Nicole, let me tell you, when I came to Los Angeles and started earning TV money, I spent every dollar of that TV money, not understanding or not realizing that Had a bad business manager before that that didn't keep me accountable for anything, didn't help me build credit.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I was in the worst of ways before Laurie came along. And she's taught me a lot since then.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Well, you know what? It's wild. I didn't realize I was doing that because I wasn't going and buying Louis Vuitton handbags. I was spending it on convenience. I was always buying extra stuff at the airport that I didn't really need on the plane, always valeting, always this. It's all the little things that would add up.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I could have cut all of that back, bought two Louis Vuitton handbags that year and still had money left over if I had just paid attention to the way that I was spending. It was overspending on...
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
uh convenience and and just the abundance of things that i didn't need overspending on having more than i needed just cause or i don't know if i feel like eating that or that so i'll get both terrible but there is like mindful eating there's mindfulness in so many other aspects now i like to talk about mindful spending too because you can do it or you can online shop without even
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
It really goes a long way.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah. And I don't know what he has personally. Well, I know Ish, but I don't look at it. Do you know what I mean? That's his business. I have my business. We're very transparent with each other. If anyone's having a month or two where it's like things are a little tighter this month or whatever, we'll be open with each other. But I'm not on top of his finances and he's not on top of mine.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
We have a lorry for that, but I don't want to be either. I think for me, I have trauma with it because I watched it destroy my mom and dad. My dad had a business. My mom tried to help because she was an accountant and it just, it didn't work. The money conversations in the house were really rough. So I also have an aversion to knowing too much about what's going on with him.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
I just need to know where solid or if we're on rocky ground and like where we're at, but I don't want to know. I don't want him to feel like he has to tell me. And I don't want to feel like I have to check in on it all the time. Because I feel like it's one of those things.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Once you unlock your boyfriend's phone and you start going through his stuff, you'll unlock it every week to go through his stuff. And I don't want to do that to someone's personal business. I just want transparency if you're having a hard time and let me know what you need from me to assist with that and vice versa.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Over finances? Over many things. They honestly weren't the greatest match in the world. They stayed together for me. And so all the things went wrong with them. And it was a pretty tumultuous household. But one of the big things was money. My dad was terrible with it. terrible with spending on convenience and some of the little habits that I'd picked up.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
But he also had this idea of wanting to appear that he had more money than he did. So it was the house that we rented. It was the cars that we drove. It was all the things that he'd spend money on luxury things to appear more wealthy than he was. But the crazy thing was that I did pick up from him was he earned so much money. He just spent it all and didn't live within his means.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And so therefore he had nothing at the end of his life. And there is a whole lot of money trauma and financial trauma there. I lent him money so much as an adult. He blew it on all sorts of crazy things. Until it got to a point where I had to cut it off and say, no, I had to stop enabling him that way. So I'm always constantly aware of a fear of being like him.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Now that I've learned about money more than when I first got here, because I don't want to end up like him, you know?
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Not so much the keeping up with the Joneses, but I certainly love nice things. But it would be more the convenience spending. If it makes it easier, then yeah. If it saves five minutes, then yeah. Valet all the time. Sure. I love that. It's just something that's built in me and I have to be a bit more aware of that, which I am now.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And certainly having kids puts those priorities above your convenience and comfort. I'd rather save for things for them than spend on convenience things for me. So that's also changed my spending a lot. But I will never forget the first time I sat down and got a statement of what was left in my account. And I think that year I had earned $480,000, right? That's a very decent amount of money.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
And there was, after paying taxes at the end of the year, absolutely nothing left. Like we're talking less than five grand that was going to be left in my account. And I did not understand. I thought there was fraud. I thought there was something going on. Someone's taking my money, like all of this. And I got moved over to a new business manager and she took me through all my spending.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
She's like, no, Shana, look, here's where it's all going. And I was floored, absolutely floored that all those little things ended up costing so much money. And that's where I made my adjustments.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
What you keep. You said that and it never left me. It never left me. It stuck with me. And honestly, chatting with you, it stuck with me. And that very simple line of not what you make, it's what you keep. I get and have been so focused on make more, make more, make more money driven, make more instead of keep more, keep more, keep more.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
It was Bri that said, what was it? Who was it that said it? I think he said it was he was listening to something about Kevin Hart or whatever and how he spends his money, whatever. Some other celebrity with a hell of a lot more money than us. But he would cut it into three sections. Half of it gone. Don't even consider it money, which I absolutely do.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
He said, and then what you've got left, halve it again. Put half of that away. And then what you've got left is what you can spend. on your life, on your expenses, on your luxuries. It made so much sense to Brian. It made so much sense to me. And so we really do try and do that a lot of the time.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Every now and then when you're looking at your account and you're like, oh, but we could spend it all on this one thing, or we could go big, or we could refurnish the whole house. It's like, well, let me think about that for a second. So we try and be as sensible as we can, save some, live a within to under our means. It's hard.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Excellent. So it's the basics. 101 of money saving.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yeah.
Money Rehab with Nicole Lapin
Say “I Do” To a Joint Bank Account? Sharna Burgess on Wedding Planning and Financial Planning
Yes. And it imprinted on me and I don't want that to happen to them. And they're also very good at saving their money. They've been given the gift cards and the cash from the grandparents, whatever. Our 12 year old has a thousand dollars. And I'm like, hold on. So why, wait, what? A thousand is so good at saving. Our younger journey, he's even got probably like $600.