Reese

Basically, the background is I had gone through a pretty rough breakup a few months prior, and I was trying to get back in the game. Yeah, good for you. Thank you. I met Jen. Her and I matched, and I kind of realized after we sort of clicked and we started talking, I didn't want to wait until after Valentine's Day to ask her out.

Yeah. Right. So I was eager and kind of realizing at that time that it was close to Valentine's Day.

I can't make a reservation. Exactly. And that's why we decided to do something different other than a restaurant. Like, I didn't want to make her feel weird at a place where there's only couples and stuff like that.

You were

So she actually suggested a bar. They were having like an all things pink night.

It's like a Valentine's Day-ish. It's like pink clothes, pink drinks, pink food.

I can see that. Yeah. Okay. And so we go in and I excuse myself to the restroom quickly while I'm doing that. She ordered us two pink strawberry daiquiris.

Here's where I messed up. Uh-oh. Is I'm diabetic. She doesn't know I'm diabetic.

Okay. I look at the drink and I think to myself... I can handle one. Yeah. You know, my blood sugar is probably going to spike.

I'll get home. I'll take my insulin and I'll just monitor that.

Well, I miscalculated it.

Well, I started having an episode. Oh, no. So I needed medical attention. And the thing is, is like there was a moment where I couldn't really talk. And I wrote on a napkin and I slid it to Jen and I slid the word hospital. Oh, my God.

What happened?

Yeah, she doesn't quite understand what the note means, and she references someone else, and that other person goes, maybe he's epileptic. You should shove a wallet in his mouth.

Managing to scribble diabetic on a napkin, which then Jen gets. And she's got to drive me to the hospital.

So things are a little foggy.

And I kind of come to and I realize, like, all of a sudden she's not there and I'm surrounded by doctors. And it was a very chaotic night.

Did you get a kiss at the end of the night?

The next morning, I send her a text and say, hey, I'm good. I'm so sorry about last night. And she responds back and was like, hey, just glad you're all right. And then that's pretty much it. And I haven't heard anything since.

I feel like if she's got empathy, she would have gone out with me already, and I really don't understand.

Yeah, um, hi, Jen. Hi, Reese. Uh-oh, Reese. So, uh, I guess I was just wondering what's going on. Why haven't you gotten back with me?

Okay, look, um... So here, like, yes. What?

Yeah, I mean, when you do stuff on the radio, I mean, you might say a lot of stuff.

Yeah, Jeff. Like, okay, Jen, like, yes, I'm in a relationship, but I'm not happy, and I want to see what was out there.

I guess so, Jen. I mean, does this ruin our chances? Yeah, Reese, you've kind of created a big mess for yourself, so I don't know what it is that you want to say to Jen, but... All right, look, I'm just saying, Jen, like, I'm not happy, and I feel like if you want to have, like, an actual Valentine's Day together, like, we can do that. We can have, like, a legit... Oh, my gosh.

Reese, you're just a big walking red flag.

I don't know that I want to do that either. See?

I don't know. I'm not worried yet.

They're like, bro, we got really drunk last night and stole a penguin.