Paul Gwilliams
Appearances
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Yeah, I'm attracted to older men. Well, how old would you go? Because I say this to Amber, I'd go 55 now, I think, because I'm nearly 40. So I'd go up to 55.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I want to talk to you about the Boys On documentary because you were watching it. Oh, yes. Let's go. Now, I didn't watch the whole thing. Obviously, I had to turn it off when Ronan started managing another band. Oh, I'm sorry.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I had a huge crush on him I fancied the pants off Shane and he came up and he goes Hi Evo No way Shane Lynch Yeah My 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20 year old self would have died He's still alright Smelt lovely Nine?
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
When did Boyzone start? Let's get the facts here. Tell this old bat she can't remember anything.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Yeah, I was actually eight. Yeah, and I was ten. Eight. Hold on a second. Yeah, I remember because it was like the first person that I like. Well, no, because I fancy Liam Gallagher and Eric Cantona. So that was my eight year old fancy. And then when I got into boys on a bit, it was always Shane Lynch.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
No, I don't really want to get involved in churchy stuff because I had to, like, we had to go to mass until we were about nine when the priest said second marriages were wrong and then my mom let us make the choice and I'm like, she thinks I'm going back in there? No way. I don't think those Christian lads go to church.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
So, Louis Walsh obviously got a real battering in the documentary and he was in it. I, like, I... Louis... I have met Louis quite a few times and he is, you can't deny he's good at what he does. He made Samantha Mumba, who she is. He did Boyzone. He did another band, I forget what they're called. So anyway, so Louis did all that.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
But then they were talking about their rise to fame and Stephen Gately, wasn't that something?
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
He seemed... That's why I guess it is right that we were much younger because he seemed kind of older. Absolutely terrible. But what I found so funny watching the documentary, so they obviously, there's a clip of them on The Late Late Show, which is one of my absolute favourite clips of all time. But basically, Ronan was saying that they had no songs or anything to sing.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
So they were just told to go on The Late Late Show and just dance and just stand there and dance. Imagine just being like, we actually... Sorry, what do you want us to do? There's nothing rehearsed, nothing. They're just going on and dancing. It was funny.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I know that they hate it, but like for... We really love it. Yeah, but we really love it. Come on, you have to give something to the world. I've given loads of great pictures. Come on, you've got to give that. But Keith was saying as well, he was like, for their first single that they were recording, Louis only flew over Ronan, Mikey and Shane. Not Shane.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Ronan, Mikey and Stephen because they were the only ones that sang and they couldn't afford to fly anyone else over. And Keith said he was really upset about it. But like... They had no money to fly them over. There were certain parts of it, like I loved Boys On, but there were certain parts I just thought, it's a little bit whingy about certain things.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Listen, I wouldn't expect to be on the album. I'm also a shite singer. Yeah, fair. You're like, I'll just lip sync from home. Yeah, I'll just do the dancing in the background. I'd just be happy to be there. I'd be like, woo!
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
They had to swap them around. I know, but you always have the best singers who do most of the singing. Everyone in the band doesn't have to be a great singer.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
oh well no but I guess like look at Pussycat Dolls Nicole Scherzinger that was basically Nicole Scherzinger they just they literally didn't eat like the other girls were treated like dancers even though they are so talented yeah but like it was only Nicole Scherzinger yeah I can just I can see why they be I don't know I felt I felt for them
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I know, so did I. Because I think that, like, I was into them, but then I moved on from them on to Oasis and stuff like that and Prodigy because I was being really cool. Yeah. But, like, all of us loved them when we were younger. Exactly.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Hello and welcome to the main episode of My Therapist Goes To Me With Me, Paul Gwilliams and Joanne McNally and... Oh, hi.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Well, you still have mad shit about that with footballers and stuff that won't come out and say that they're gay. Yeah. I hope it's changing. And it is changing a little bit, but not in certain sports. Anyway.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Yeah, but Joanne, you said you don't like a holy man. He says God bless all the time.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
oh my god I remember when Spenny and I did our live shows and like he would call Ronan Keating because he was trying to show off that he had a famous person in his phone and Ronan Keating was like one of the most famous he wouldn't call me you know little prick you wouldn't answer I know I wouldn't answer I'm like Spencer don't think so I know they're on stage I'm not getting paid for that get lost
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Okay, so Bonnie Blue slapped 1,057 guys in 12 hours. Basically, there was a 20-year-old guy, by the way, that went in to sleep with Bonnie Blue. Did you see that? And his mother came in screaming the place down. I'd go absolutely crazy. And I actually, like, I know that we've spoken about Bonnie Blue before and we're trying to be really non-critical, but, like, I don't agree with her.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I think she's setting really bad examples and it makes me worried. Yeah.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I think you see I just I'm like I think that's our instinct is to go after her but she's just doing she's just working in the sex industry women have been doing that since the fucking dinosaurs I know but like just do it but why do you have to have this whole thing where you want to sleep with over a thousand guys and now there's another girl that is on what's it called OnlyFans her name is Lily Phillips and they're trying to one up each other so Lily Phillips has said she wants to have anal sex with as many guys as possible and it's actually the implications of that like Bonnie Blue as well
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
like it's really it's not good for your health to be doing that you're like you're not designed to be able to have sex with 1057 guys in 12 hours to do that in your ass I know it's terrible it's not like but people are like like you could be incontinent for the rest of your life like it's just And what, for one-offmanship on each other?
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I have so many as well on Instagram. Thousands of males asking me to join these wordies online and all these sex cam things. If you go into your mails, there's so many of them.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I just feel like a lot of young girls who end up going like Charlie Sheen's daughter ended up going on OnlyFans and it's just like you're going to regret that like that's such a huge life choice to make at 18 that then that's what you're known as for the rest of your life when you mightn't even know what you're getting yourself into think of yourself at 18 like I was a disaster at 18 I was a virgin yeah me too there's no chance of me being on OnlyFans it was like what am I doing here it would have been quite the baptism of fire laughing
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
go from absolute gentle fingering myself with a candlestick to getting to an anal with a thousand lads for attention Jesus Christ God it's so it's so it's terrible it's like but Bonnie Blue is just she's a bit grim like she's coming out and she's like well I don't really care if I get HIV and it's like Like, yeah, you do.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Do you remember we used to go out with the glitter? Did you used to put the glitter on your cheekbones?
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
God love her. But you know what? When I did my sex documentary and I went into, there's a sex dungeon in London and I went into the sex dungeon and it's history, it's underground and they have all these sex toys that people borrow and you put them in a box and you're done. What? What do you mean you put them in a box when you don't? You put them in a box and then they wash them. People reuse them.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Oh, you can borrow them. So you go in there, you rent it out with your partner or partners. There's a little cage and everything in there. And the walls are full of sex toys.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
not fun but anyway so you put them you put them in a box when you're finished so then they're washed for the next person to use but the size of some of the dildos in there they are like the size of your arm and they are like there is prolapse written all over them well it depends how much anal you're having because if you're having if you're doing if you're doing a thousand a day you know what I mean I think that would come out my nose things are going to get loose things are going to get loose down there
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
shaming me on a full flight she went three weeks did you go to the penguin beach I will do whatever I wish to do did you go to the penguin beach I fucking didn't oh for fuck's sake I can see penguins online anytime I want Joanne I just you know what this is Joanne's day you can't even touch them you know she walked down to Peter's restaurant she had the same chicken salad every day chicken salad yeah poached eggs and toast and then I would go and do my gyming or training because you've brainwashed me
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
When you talk about like being a virgin at 18, like so was I, but like I was so terrified back then of being called a slut because it was the worst thing in the world. Yeah. Yet the boys were never like. No, it's so different for them. But still, but still now. Yeah. And it's just like. But you know who makes up those rules?
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I don't even like being called a bird, though. I don't know. Yeah, do you know what I do love, though? I love being called love by a taxi man. Yeah, I do like that. I like being called darling as well.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Don't make a weird joke. Okay? Pop it. Pop it. Me and Sven call each other boo sometimes and like I actually heard somebody else doing it to their partner the other day and I was like and then I was like but I do that all the time. Do you know what I've never been able to pull off?
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
And like, when you'd be going out with someone when you were younger and you'd send them a message, you'd be like, hey sexy, what are you doing? I used to call all my boyfriends, hey, sexy, what are you doing, WB? WB. S-S-X-Y.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I was going to say Burghine, but I'm not going to Burghine. She will go to Burghine. I'm just going to tell you one thing. You can put my London tickets back in the pot. I'm going to one of these ones. I didn't know you were doing really good. Wouldn't it be so much fun? Yes.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Oh no, maybe I want to go to Copenhagen as well. Yeah, come to Copenhagen.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I loved that as well. I found that really depressing, to be honest with you. Do you know what I can't get enough of, though? A place in the sun. I can't stop watching it. It's not easy watching. They're like, we would like a seven bedroom mansion with a swimming pool for five grand, please. And it's like, no.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
where your weed is yeah there's like cannibalist shopping centres I walked by this fella this morning and fair enough do whatever you want 25 to 8 he's smoking a spliff when I'm dropping the kids I'm like how can you function for the day well he can't I guess that's the dream just as being like the state of like deadness he'll come to at dinner time he'll be delighted with himself no no no well I anyway because the food in Cape Town is
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
It felt like you were away for way longer, though. It's only three weeks. I'm more the holiday one than you are. So when you go away, it just feels unusual.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Here on your work laptop, Google how much a weed pen is in South Africa.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I like to sit in a shade in the shade in a shade under the umbrella I don't like to sit out tanning I like to do stuff
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Yeah, to get a break from the pen. Well, I have bad news for you. I know we're not anymore in dry Jan, but I just, I can't do it to myself anymore. And I know I keep saying is, I went out for my brother's birthday to Tramp. Didn't see Prince Andrew there. But I went and we went out and then I had to ring Amber. Amber of all people.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I had to ring her and say, Amber, do I need to be concerned about anything? Because, you know, it's Monday morning and I was I was still kind of happy yesterday and still kind of like just like. Yeah. And then I woke up saying I was like, did I say anything that I need to be concerned about? And then I was like, you're always very well behaved.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Oh, but Joanne, I had to check my taxi app and I was like, Amber, there's no recent taxi on line. How did we get home? And I was like, that's it for me now. And I know I keep saying this, but there's at least three or four weeks where I'm not drinking again. Yeah, that's fine.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
It seems to really affect you. I still have the fear really badly, even though Amber told me it's fine. Then I text Alexander to make sure.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
everything was okay because Alexander came back I woke up in Amber's bed and she hates sleeping with people in my coat and I was like in my coat and Amber was like get out and this is at like half 8 in the morning and I was like Amber first of all fuck you waking me up like that when I'm fast asleep and then I had to go back upstairs and sleep till 11 I was in bits Cut out loads of my fucks, Jo.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I'm having a bad day for it. You've the worst potty mouth ever. It's so bad. My mom's like, my mom's always like, why are you swearing so much? And I said, Sandra, I remember you used to sit us down and you used to teach us how to swear and you used to make us spell out the swear words. But you weren't always like that. I did not. You're disgusting.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Yes, they were South African. I absolutely love the South African accent. One of my favourite accents. East London, South African.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Oh my God, that's just reminded me that like, that's what I'm like as a friend. No wonder no one wants to do anything with me because I'm always like, well, we go for a run. Let's go for a walk. Run, walk, gym together. Will we go to this gym class?
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
I'm literally always like, I've just made myself a run date recently and they always cancel as well. People agree to it and then they're like, no, I actually can't go now.
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
and that is like what I that's like my highlight I hate the pub I really hate the pub I hate it I think it's because my dad had me in them for so long when I was younger like I've spent more time in pubs than you have I guarantee it because growing up that's 100% true growing up my entire childhood was spent in a pub yeah but he's dead now and I'm still going so
My Therapist Ghosted Me
God Bless...
Don't be disgusting now. You wouldn't have done anything weird. We would have. You know we would have now.