Oscar
Appearances
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
And the only reason I know this is a long time ago, I worked at a finance institution as a loan officer, and it was the same bank he worked at. and they would always come to me and say, hey, what's going on with your dad? And it got to the point where it was stressing me out so much I couldn't be there anymore. I didn't want to be part of his financial burden, and it was taking a toll on me.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
Yeah, absolutely. And I just... I was stressing over something that I genuinely didn't have any concern over because at that point I didn't live in this house. Obviously, he's still my dad. I'm concerned about his well-being financially. Sure. Where are you at, Oscar, financially?
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
So I am right now on baby step number one. Okay. Trying to work towards two. I have all my debts lined up, ready to go. Hopefully, by the end of this year, I will have all my consumer debt paid off. I don't have very much.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
Hey there, how you guys doing today?
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
So my question was regarding an issue I have with, more importantly, my dad. So my dad's always gotten into this habit of every so often asking to borrow money, which I'm not hurting for, so I don't mind. But he's gotten to the point where I dread taking his calls. Because it's not about checking up on me or checking up on the kids.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
I always feel like it's going to be, hey, by the way, can I borrow X amount of dollars? So my question is, how do I go about starting the conversation and to where I tell him, hey, enough's enough.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
Honestly, I don't even ask at this point. I'm assuming bills. Ever since I was a kid, he was never great with money. I remember when me and my sister were younger, we always had to help them translate to let their landlord know that we're going to be late on the bills. And it's always been a never-ending cycle.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
Honestly, I don't know 100%, but I'd say somewhere around the $50,000, $60,000 range.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
He's married. My mom still lives at home. My mom, she's had a lot of medical complications, so she doesn't really work. Every once in a while, she does get some under-the-table work through a restaurant that our family owns. But other than that, she really doesn't have a stable income. Okay.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
Well, I mean, if we have family gatherings, yeah, we get together. We can be amicable, but he never comes over just to hang out. I mean, even when I was younger, it was more of a business casual relationship. I can tell you right now, if we're sitting in a car for an hour or two, the most we talk about is the weather.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
I have an older sister and a younger brother.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
My little brother, he does not. He still lives at home. But he is of age to not live there. But he will call my sister if I tell him, hey, I can't help you anymore. Or I can't help you this week.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
Yeah, me and my sister talk about it all done.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
We're frustrated. So you're both, okay. We both have our own families.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
The most he's asked in one sitting was like $1,200. And typically... When it's, I guess the larger the amount, the bigger of a gap between him asking for more, but I'd say roughly about once a month, maybe.
The Ramsey Show
Don’t Let Toxic Money Situations Keep You Trapped
So I know, like I said earlier, my dad's terrible with money. He's always been a guy who bought scratchers at the gas station, but it's never been, at least to my knowledge, so extensive that he would blow his whole paycheck on it. I know he's always been struggling with payday loans here and there.