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Neil Rubenstein

Appearances

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

1974.395

Everyone's good? We're good? All right. Yeah. No, it's, yeah. No, I get it. Because you guys saw me, you're like, this guy ain't afraid of nothing, you know? And then you heard me. And you're like, oh, he's afraid of the dark. That's what that is. I was told I sound like the person, I look like I kidnapped. All right. That's okay. All right. I'm doing all right? Okay.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2004.249

I don't mind being a big guy, you know, usually pretty safe, right? Like, I remember one time I was walking in Brooklyn, and this was before Brooklyn was a yoga studio, you know, so. Streets are so riddled with crime and gluten. And this dude popped out to mug me, and I was like, nah, man, get the next guy. And he was like, okay, thank you. I just scared him out.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2024.762

I was like, this is mint, everyone should give this a shot. Oh, all right, cool.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2039.109

That's a good answer. Just spell it right, you know?

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2058.843

I don't get that, but all right.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2082.872

What the fuck was that? I started in New York, and I live here now. Well, I'm staying here now. I don't know if I live here, but we'll see.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2093.334

Since January. Okay. Do you like it? I like the city very much. I liked it when I would visit the scene, I liked the scene. But now that I'm like... Because when you're visiting, they're like, oh, come do my show, come do my show. And now that I'm here, they're like, oh, fuck you, dude. So, but it's all right. I like it.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2119.539

Well, yeah, I like to think that, but who knows, you know?

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2125.702

All right, all right, no, that's good. Yeah, that's good. All right, cool, cool, cool.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2139.206

Do you have any dark secrets? I have so many dark secrets.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2144.207

What's the darkest thing about you? I don't know, man. There's so much, I try to leave that behind, you know? Just trying to fix the things I broke, you know? Like the floor?

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2155.176

Yeah. Mostly patio furniture. Yeah. Yeah. That's my dating profile says I'll break your lawn furniture.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2171.909

I had been a full-time comedian.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2175.568

but sort of still doing that, but you gotta side hustles now.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2184.651

Just personal assistant stuff. I used to tour manage bands, so I have that skill set. So I help out a bigger comic on some of their scheduling and itineraries and stuff.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2201.557

Keep it around, you know?

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2204.239

Yeah, I like baseball. What do you like about baseball? I think it's a wonderful sport. I think it involves athleticism and strategy.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2232.689

Yeah. I like going to baseball games because I can have someone rub sunblock on me.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2253.075

Bigger in size or in... That's all I know. I'm not that big.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2269.407

Yeah, that's what we're talking about. I'm not, like, using a rascal fat. I still fit in the booth at Applebee's. Like, I'm just a... That's a great... Yeah.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2282.056

Yeah. Yeah. Like, yeah, airplane bathrooms are difficult, but fucking who?

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2310.821

I like them so much, though.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2314.924

I kind of look like I'm Redman back from the future to tell them. Don't do it. There's still time. Don't do it. Don't do it.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2354.802

I couldn't fill those shoes, I'm sorry.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2364.978

Oh, man. I don't know what to... I don't know where to start. You've been married? You have kids? Yeah, married, no kids, raised by wolves.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2376.732

My parents, you know. Everyone's got a thing. Um... I played and toured with some rock bands.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2387.564

I was just in a hardcore band a long time ago.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2407.568

I have a tiny little voice now.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2432.358

Can I get one of those little placards for my car?

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2436.779

The guy's just saying, sing.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2441.0

Did you miss the whole thing? We just did a thing about not doing that.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2446.633

So what happened to your voice exactly? Just screaming a lot, you know, growing up. So you can't sing anything anymore? I can't really get louder. Like, I can do a little bit of projecting, but I can't, like, sound cool.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2460.886

Maybe. It depends on your... Were you just screaming kind of, like... Screaming and shouty, a lot of shouty.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2470.636

No, no. Hey, guys, I don't know if I can sing about fucking hip-hop anymore. It's been real, guys. Peace out, everybody. I got to hit the bricks.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2489.972

I think, like, I started them... And then, I started late though, I didn't start getting tattooed till like early 20s.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2502.209

I wasn't in a big, I am on a Taking Back Sunday record, two Taking Back Sunday records. Whoa. But just like background screaming, not like, I'm not a member, but I have a platinum record, which is nice.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2521.943

Back before, where you want to be and tell all your friends.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2530.366

I'm on, I mean, I'm not a member of the band, but I'm on the record. And like, yeah, I mean, if you Google me, yeah, they're up there.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2543.09

It's the brand new lyrics. Oh, no. I did that. What do you mean? They were like, this song is about... Who the fuck is that?

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2585.076

What is the lyrics? It's have another drink and drive yourself home. I hope there's ice on all the roads. And you can think of me when you forget your seatbelt and again when your head goes through the windshield. Let's go. Hell yeah.

KILL TONY

#716 - CHRIS O'CONNOR + TIM BUTTERLY

2626.724

I am flying to Milwaukee for shows.