Mio Love
Appearances
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
My minute started? Oh, shit. Look, I'm 34 and recently separated. And for some reason, my right titty, she went caca. That bitch looking like Biggie Smalls. She doing a right face for no reason. I have to reel her back in. And I want to come back to the game with real big dick energy, you know? So I talked to my cousin, and she said, bitch, you need to get waxed.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
It lasts forever, and it leaves your skin smooth like a dolphin. So I did. I made the appointment. And there I was, spread like a dolphin. The lady's foot in the wax. She's foot in the strip. And with no regards to my life or to Jesus, she goes, ching-chang-chung-sa! Ma'am, I discovered the connection between your vision and that lip. I went fucking blind.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
I lost all control of my body, and for some reason, I just kicked the lady. Don't feel bad for the lady. She got kicked before. Cause she took it like a champ. She got backed up and she wanted to do the other one. At 34, I learned a valuable lesson. You need to love yourself. So right now I'm looking like a yin yang. I got one bushy bush and one smooth like a dolphin, baby. Thank you so much.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
You are not Killeen anyone tonight. I'm from Garbage Island.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
I was a 92 Alpha logistics specialist. So to all my logistics, thank you.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
Well, the Army brought me here, so I've been here for 13 years in Texas. I love Texas.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
I'm veteran retired. I'm a full-time mom. I have two daughters, and my oldest daughter is autistic, so I do full care for her.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
She was nonverbal, and I will tell you a serious note. When she was diagnosed, they told me that it was nonverbal, and she had, like, mental retardation. Marley talks. I don't know. Marley's... Marley Talks.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
Thank you to all the people that do ABA therapy, to everybody that works for autism. Autism speaks, my daughter speaks.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
And she, next year, is due to start regular school with the regular population, just with an aid.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
Have you tried taking her to church? She's verbal now, yes.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
First words were mama, of course. But after that, now it's like, I want cookies. That's all.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
What do you do when you... I do comedy since I'm a full-time mom.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
I do come here for more comedy. I come here to the show for the comedy. Mothership is an awesome show. So I really surround myself around comedy.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
If it's for married couples that want to stay together, it's not the show to watch. For everybody that wants to know the truth, here I am. It's a public announcement every time. I teach every class. We do every other Fridays in Killeen. Ladies, follow me.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
I do a comedy show every other Friday in Killeen. It's Friday late night. For married couples? No, no. For people that are not married. If you're married, happily married, don't come to my show. I might fuck it up.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
Because I do point out everything that is messed up. Oh, you talk about crazy stuff. Crazy stuff. Crazy.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
No. It's my first one, but the guy was crazy. He was Puerto Rican, of course. Okay.
KILL TONY
#693 - JEFF DYE + RICK GLASSMAN
Puerto Ricans are very proud, and we just want you to know that it's a beautiful island.