Karamo Brown

This is going to sound morbid, but it's not meant to be. I can't wait till you and I are ancestors.

Bitch, we are going to be everything.

I thought nobody was allowed to cry. Oh, and now y'all want to edit them all in. Oh, and then now season three, it's like, can you make the girls cry?

Oh, now you want the tears, girl. Oh. And so, but in the beginning, it was me questioning when what I knew was right and what I knew this show needed for evolution. Because my castmates are phenomenal. JVN is one of the funniest people I've ever seen. Anthony is one of the most empathetic people I've ever known. Tan is one of the most creative and strong-willed people I've ever met.

Bobby was just so loving and endearing. And I was just like, I know that this show, for being evolution, where we're at, needs a mental health component. And it was funny because it was not seen before. And I was told that I was wrong. And I just had to continue to do it under the guise that I was told during episode two that they were going to fire me.

Yeah, that's what I'm saying, because my gut was telling me. That's what we talked about. And so, but that fear of feeling like, okay, you know, like, I believe in the law of abundance.

Yeah.

There will be something. Same.

Same.

Oh, my gosh. I mean, well, she was just a poor little girl from, you know. No, seriously. I was just I grew up like super poor and like super like tough life. You know, like, you know, like my parents are not from this country. We had no money. I mean, like my father was abusive. It was like a lot of that. I told the world I was gay at 15.

The universe will provide. God will provide. Answers will provide. I will provide. And so I was like, well, I'm not going to let this fear that you're trying to put onto me stop me from doing what I'm supposed to do in this moment. And if I'm only supposed to do it for one season or two, then that's what it is. And now we're in season nine.

And then the girl got a talk show off of it.

And that's what I always saw with the original show, which I thought was... I love the original show, but I was like... We're not going deeper. What I know to be true about any person I know is that you can fix all the outside, girl, but if you ain't figured it out on the inside, it's take you about a week before you stop cutting your hair, before you stop brushing your teeth.

That's why most of these girls who think that they can fix men, I'd be like, girl, you cannot fix him until he wants to fix himself.

You can't love them into being a good partner. You can't. And so they have to do that work on their own.

And so that's what my goal was for this is like, let me help you to understand how to do that. So when anything else that comes in your life will be an addition to it will gain you more.

And when I say the girls, I always mean the guys and the girls. The gays and girls.

I say that too.

It's the truth. It's the truth.

Well, okay, yeah. Well, I'll tell you this. Let me figure that out. I'll tell you the thing that I hear the most that I'm annoyed by.

The thing that I hear the most is, and this is not just on my talk show, I've heard this for years, is when I'm like, well, why don't you leave? Because, you know, my whole thing is about do you understand what you deserve?

Is you, yeah.

You know, is, but Karamo, I love him.

Yeah.

I have shot over 300 episodes in my talk show. And I promise you 80% of the time, when I ask somebody, why are you saying some stupid shit? They're like, because Karama, I love him. But Karama, I love him. And I'm like... Do you love you? Okay, yeah.

That's the only... That's your marker? Like, that's it? Like, I just asked you and that's the one thing? Bitch, you could have given me anything, bitch. You could have told me, like, you know what? He gets up and he fucking cooks me breakfast every morning and I'm a fat ass and I need my fucking food. Like, I don't know.

But I love him? Yeah. Girl, you got to get together. Let me see. What's the question I hear most?

And then it just made my life chaotic then because like having family not from this country, they did not like it. I'm the only boy. And it was just like, oh my gosh, what's going on? But within that, I just kept believing that something had to be better. And that has always been the core crutch of my life is that something has to be better. I would tell myself two things every day, which is,

Obvious.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know. But for me, and not to go, I'm going to get back to your question because I'm thinking about it at the same time. But then that also leads into, do you know the definition of love? And I think that most people have never truly defined what love is. They have either a Hollywood version of what they think love is.

They either have a skewed version from the love that they saw in their households. And so they don't know what love is. And I always tell people, if you can define what you deserve and you can define what love is, It will, like you said, lead you to a place where you love yourself and then realize that no one can love you more than you love you.

Yeah.

Otherwise, the relationship will not work.

And that is such a key thing.

Can I talk about this really quickly?

I'm fucking so glad that this I'm so thankful.

That this generation, all generations has your voice.

I just want to give you some praise right now.

Seriously, I know. But what you do is just so powerful and impactful. Thank you. People need to hear this from somebody who looks like them, sounds like them, and is letting you know, like, Girl, I might not have all the answers, but I know this answer.

it is okay.

Something has to be better. And if this Yahoo can do it, then so can I. I've been saying that through those things forever. So to this day, when I see something I want, I'm like, well, if that Yahoo can do it, then I can. And so, you know, just all those things led me to be like, I want to be able to be there for myself, but I also want to be there for other people.

It's so necessary.

And I think talking about that whole time thing and like people understand that like just because you invested 20 years in some man doesn't mean that you can't invest 30 more in yourself.

Right.

And I don't know why people don't see that math.

Yeah, exactly. It's like they only see the first half.

Yeah. It's not like you're about, you know, like you're about to pass tomorrow or something like there is a lot of life left to live for you. Right. And. what would that world look like of investing in yourself in those years? And again, I just don't think people know how to reframe their questions. And I wish that we could teach people from high school or middle school how to reframe.

Instead of looking at one thing, how do we look at it from another perspective? Instead of looking at it as loss, how do I look at it? What am I going to gain for myself? What can we do here to make sure that we're reframing our lives, that we're the center of it?

I live in abundance.

It makes me nervous.

Yeah.

Neither do I. Right. I do not. Never have.

I want you and I to do a masterclass on success.

Because I'm telling you the stories and the parallels are almost identical.

Right.

And what I've learned in me talking to people who are successful.

Mm hmm.

younger, older, same age, is these same things. I've told people before that as I was coming into hosting, I used to get up and go to Access Hollywood for free every morning at seven o'clock in the morning to do these segments for free for like a year and a half. This is a big company, NBC, didn't give me a single coin.

And it led me to a career in social services, which then one day I wanted to be in TV. And my family said TV is not a real job. And I was like, I'll show you what a real job is.

I used to go every morning, Faithful, and then would get off of work and go to CNN, NHLN, right off of Sunset and do the same thing again on one of those shows for free every night for almost a year and a half. And people were like, what are you doing? And I was like, because I believe in abundance and I know this is going to lead to more and lead to more money.

And there were so many people that I was like, come on, you should come. I can hook you up. You want to be a host? You want to be in TV? You want to be in podcasting? Come through. I can hook you up. And they were like, no, girl, I can't do it. I'm not going to show up every day for free. And I was like, okay, girl.

Right. Thank you. And so I think these are the lessons that sometimes people forget. That's the sacrifice.

With the belief in abundance and believe that things are coming to you is so important.

And the girls miss it.

You know what I mean? And then it led me to getting my first job with Oprah hosting a show.

But look at that.

That's what I say about it. And if you don't have someone in your life that can help you to reframe when you're in a moment, those are things I look for. My best friend and I, we've talked about him already, he's here. We are stuck together for 25 years because when I need to reframe and I don't know, I can't see it, he's there, and vice versa.

When he thinks this moment is like, oh my gosh, he gets into that fear-based mindset.

Mm-hmm.

I immediately am able to pull him out and say, no, let's reframe this, girl.

Yeah, totally.

Like, oh, maybe you leaving this or maybe this or what do you want to work with or what it is to make yourself see what is better. Totally. And it's such an important lesson that people forget in, like, success in life and relationships.

Which, by the way, they fired me from. And the EP of that show told me that I was not a good host and I would never host ever again. She kept on the two other girls.

I swear you and I are from the same soul.

Yes.

Okay, thank you.

Hire him.

He got it. Got it.

Got it. Bitch, I'm with you.

I'm with you.

And I have your Alex. I have my Tyler.

I've actually seen them, and I'm like, thanks for the encouragement, girl.

Never wrong. And I have not let, and people are always like, why are you so faithful? And I'm like, because when the people believe in you,

Yeah.

Thank you for making me who I am, because I was like, oh, really? And then, you know, got Queer Eye, changed my category around, and then got a talk show, going in season three right now, and that's just where I'm at.

Yeah.

You will be.

Yes.

I'm obsessed with you. You live here in L.A.? Yes, I do. Oh, my gosh. We're going to be friends.

Kansas City. I got it already.

Kansas City. Ooh. season three and four yeah it was my favorite really because we were in a space where people kind of knew what we were doing yeah but they didn't know the format yet right so everyone still was coming in very much like so like the people we help it's beautiful i love them

they're coming, they're genuine, but they've seen the show for nine seasons, and so they come in with expectations.

Yeah, understanding, and also they're coming in waiting. So it makes all of our jobs a little bit harder, because we actually are doing the job, if you heard when you spoke to JVN or Bobby.

Yeah.

we are literally, so it makes it a little bit more difficult because now I gotta figure out a new way to get in because you already have your speech prepared of what you think I wanna hear about what's going on on the inside. And so now I have to figure out through watching you, through paying attention to action, seeing what words trigger you, see what's going on, and find a brand new way.

And I've gotten good at it. So now they'll come in with saying like, oh, I wanna talk about my mother and this stuff, and I'm like, girl, that's not your issue, but of course, sure. And then I will help them guide it. And so season three, four, there was none of that.

Yeah, it was like, yeah, we were we were successful, but it was like they didn't know the format.

And it was great. And so I just remember those episodes just like, oh, my gosh. I remember there was this guy and he I took him a dance studio and like he thought we were going to go dancing. And I made him like look at himself in the mirror in this real way. And I remember we won an Emmy for that. I remember that's also the season that we had a guy who was paralyzed in a wheelchair.

And I connected him with the man who shot him. And I mean like those are days when it was like they did not know what was going on. He thought we were going to a restaurant. I'm like, oh, by the way, I invited the man who shot you here so we can get you to get closure. And so I love that season, season three and four.

Well, what I love about my new show now is that people because so I got into the space of like real people. And so when you're like there's daytime talk shows that are celebrity based and then there's real base. And unfortunately, and I'm be real with you.

Yes.

Yeah.

Celebrities, the the real people based shows have gotten a bad rep.

Because I do believe if you don't believe it first, then nobody else is.

Yeah.

Because over the last 20 years, it's been about exploitation. It's about running crazy. Yeah. And that was hard for me because I almost didn't take it. Yeah. Because I was like, I can't. I can't be in the fake stuff.

And so I was like, I got to show people that I'm authentically still me and that someone can come with their real emotions. I'm not going to judge your real emotions, but just know girl, there's a moment that we got to all come together and be real. Like we're going to talk about really what's going on. We're going to get some real advice and we're going to, you're real people.

And I've said that a million times on my show. I will say to them, like, okay, these people might be here to watch it. I'm sitting in this seat because God has ordained me to be able to give you some advice, and that's why you're here. And so what I love about it is that people are, it's catching on more and more.

Because I remember season one, in the comments, it'd be like, is Carollan or Jerry Amore? And I'm like, girl, no shit, those white men, they were successful, girl. You know what I mean? But that's not my tea. Do I look like them? I do not look like them. But, you know, I get it. People want to compare you. They want to compare. Even though I tell people all the time comparison is the thief of joy.

Amen. And you're not going to steal my joy by trying to compare me to someone else. Amen, bitch. Okay? And so now, it's so funny because now in season three, I don't see that anymore.

It is real.

It's like people realize just because there are people with real emotions that you're going to see me actively trying to make these people see that they can be better. Like I created this segment on my show called Unlock the Phone because in... in real people talk shows, it's always results driven. And that's what Rikki Lake's doing. She created that motto and it worked.

And the words you say to yourself. People don't understand. It's called self. Everything starts with self. And if your self is not right, everything else around you is going to not work. And then you're going to look at yourself and be like, why is this not working, girl? Because self is not working.

And so the rest of the girls picked it up. That's why you saw Maury giving paternity tests 24-7. And so I was like, okay, what is mine going to be for this generation? And we know we're all on the phone. But I created it for transparency. Because I'm like, in relationships, if there's no transparency, there's no trust.

And once that trust is broken, then you're never going to have a foundation to be able to build upon. And so I was like, We need to hire someone. So we hired an FBI agent who actually can find anything up to five years deleted.

We find everything. People come on the show, they think it's stupid or whatever.

Not real, whatever. But what I did it for and what happens is that these people come on and then I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. This is no longer he can gaslight you. He can no longer tell you what's going on. You have the facts in front of you. So now it's a choice that you're going to make and you're going to stay. And if you make this choice, just know the complaining is going to stop.

And I'm going to make sure all your friends and family know stop listening to this complaining because they have the facts. They're making a choice to be here. Or you can use this to make a choice to say I deserve more.

And if I can be honest with you, the best thing for me is that I've had executives who believe in me. Yeah. Like there's been a changing of the guards and the executives at my network.

There's a woman by the name of Dana Moran. I'm going to shout her out. She's like a senior vice president at NBC. And this woman has been committed to wanting to see – people heal.

Yeah.

And I think when you have executives that want to see change, it definitely then ends up changing.

Absolutely.

That's who's making the cut in the chat, girl. So I can do all I can on the stage. You are cutting a check and making something different. And it's been a it's been such a blessing because, yeah, I'm trying to change this genre back to something that could be good and healthy.

Because girls forget that Oprah started in my genre. And then she said one day, I'm gonna get out and I'm gonna change it up. And all the rest of the girls followed. And the ones who left behind, girl, got trashy.

So that is the goal. So check with me again at season 10. I love that. And if I'm not there, girl, be like, girl, you tried, girl, get out.

Actually, no, can I tell you something? No. Please do. Actually, what I've been doing, what I'm so proud of, and this has not been talked about much, but I'm going to talk my shit.

So there has never been a daytime talk show in my genre where the host has given out therapy. And in season one, the amount of money I paid for therapy on show, it was on camera, I would say... And now that we have talked about this, I've given you a first step. Can I pay for therapy? Will you accept therapy? And bitch, I have had that network paying for therapy like fucking crazy. Period, bitch.

I love that. And I am so proud of that because there has never been a daytime talk show. You should be. So when you be like giving out cards, girl, I'm giving out therapy and I'm so excited about it.

Car for the mind. Girl, you're going to drive yourself to where you need to go. But the girls are getting therapy.

And so for me, I'm like most of the individuals who would call a daytime talk show. You never have access or financially or opportunity to do it. And I'm like, girl, if you're going to come on here and you're going to show your story for the world, like, yes, you got me and I'm going to really help you. But, girl, I want to make sure you leave with some stuff. And there's times.

where girls are like no i'm not ready i don't want it because they're afraid of it yeah but the amount of money i've had this network pay off a therapy girl you better work and also i make them keep it in yeah it's important to see people absolutely accepting therapy that is very that is very very fucking important and honestly you should be so proud of that i'm i'm so proud to know that and to know you i think that's fucking incredible

Well, because you need somebody who understands your experience.

And if I can be honest with you, not to go back to this, but to share.

I think that's also why I have also found my success and found this lane and been doing well in my daytime talk show and been surpassing numbers that they thought is because in my genre, it has always been white men talking to women of color, LGBT people, families of color. And we've seen how these white men, unfortunately, no shade to them. But they don't understand the struggles.

So when someone is sitting in front of me, I'm always like, I get it. I understand what you're going through. I understand where you've been.

They believe me. And they know. Most of them know my story. And so... It makes it so much easier. I give apologies. I give hugs. I do things that like you never saw the white man in this space before. Ever. Hugging these individuals and hugging their guests and saying, I see you. I understand you.

Yeah.

And so it does like when you're going to therapy.

Yeah.

Seeing someone who looks like you gives you the ease to know, oh, girl.

Yeah.

There's no judgment here. Right. You want to see me.

Biggest pride and joy of my career right now. because I've shifted in this daytime talk show, has been people coming up to me and saying, thank you for what you do for our community. Which I got that before in the LGBT community a lot. I got people saying of all races and genders, thank you for helping me.

But now having black folks and people of color always coming up to me saying that just kind of makes me feel like, oh girl.

Like the ancestors was like, girl, finally, we got you on it.

Okay.

The best piece of advice is it needs to be a daily practice. And so I usually don't give generic advice. It's one of my big things because I think that like advice, I think there's people who know how to give advice that is clear and concise, you do. And then there's people who give these generic like, oh, blanket shit. But what I will say to someone is to work on yourself is a daily thing.

And I think people think it's a, oh, I did a little self-care routine. Watch the video. It is this way that I schedule. And people know I'm a father. The way I scheduled my kids schedule, the way I scheduled work is the same way I schedule work.

my daily care for my self-esteem and self-worth right it is a daily practice and i schedule out an hour and a half to two hours and this includes things that just like when you go to work and you know you got to get up for that meeting you know i gotta do this same way you get up and you're like the kids have to have this the kids have to do this yeah the same way you know i'm in a relationship and we got to have time for this and that the same way you do that you have to schedule it out and figure out what it is ahead of time yeah it has to be daily yeah you can give yourself two days off just like at work yeah but you have to and i would recommend i'm doing that yeah

Because if you don't practice your self-esteem and self-worth daily, the rest of the influences from the world become louder than what you're practicing. And so I would say to anybody who sees themselves in this space, sit down first and schedule you. Because until you start to schedule you, everything else is going to be a priority.

Right.

Except you. Except for you. And I think that's a logical first step for people who are not there. And for even these people who think they do the work, you can schedule yourself more. and then also really understand what areas you need to work on.

Yeah.

Oh, I live. There's room enough atop of this view, girl.

We can all be up there.

When the girls do wrong and then they want to thank you for helping them see, girl, that is just a fucking... That is not healing. That is not growth. None of y'all be fooled for that.

Because a narcissist will hope that you'll hold on to that and feel so full.

Well, Hollywood has made us feel like it's not.

Hollywood has made you feel like... Just because you have friends. I mean, like, Sex and the City had us all in a chokehold, girl. And it was like, she's surrounded by love.

And like, surrounded by three girlfriends who are like, we love you and we will always show up for you. But you're not enough.

Can I remind that? Thank you for sharing that story because it reminds me of also like telling girls or anybody, the girls, like reframing that idea of like, I can't be alone. I'm lonely.

Yeah.

And like whatever. And understanding like when I talk about that daily practice. Right. It's things like this where you say, OK, if I have a fear of being alone, what can I do to reframe to show myself that I'm not alone?

Right.

What can I what activity can I do one thing today for myself that I'm doing by myself where I can find joy in it? Because sometimes I always look at people who are like, I'm too afraid to go to dinner or movies by myself. Got it. That's your fear.

Right.

But there's somewhere else that you can go that you'll still completely feel happy. And you've got to search for that place. Because I'm a girl that, like, I can go on a trip by myself. I don't want to do it. I need a buddy. I need a pal. But I definitely can go to a symphony by myself. And I can go to a ballet by myself. And I find myself being so happy and finding myself feel so fulfilled.

And those are moments when I used to wake up to myself and be like, girl, you're not that girl that has to have somebody. You actually can be alone. And you can find joy and walk out of there smiley and having cute little conversations and feel so fulfilled. So the work that you have to do in reframing is that type of work. Absolutely. Where do you see yourself?

If that's the fear, where do you see that? Maybe that fear won't apply so that you can do that work on yourself so you can see what you deserve so you can wake up.

The same as you did. Really? I just felt kind of like, what is this? You know what I mean? Because I'm a person. We put into the work. We do the work.

Oh, girl, I know this shit.

Yeah. Even if she says no, have more sex.

I care deeply about you, so... I kind of wanted your intro. No, I'm joking. I love you.

Yeah.

We're confident. We're sure.

So, again, she said, well, sometimes I don't want to, and he said, doesn't matter.

I don't give a fuck what you want.

Like, yeah. Sounds like sound advice to me.

Yeah.

He's like, well, I'm talking about what will help me.

Like, what is wrong with people?

Like, that's the type of people that, like, I cringe, first of all.

Because I'm like, you're in a relationship and you're making a commitment. This is your wife and you're making a commitment to her.

And then when someone else doesn't see, or we don't, the vision we saw, like you said, the view got up there. It wasn't there. In my case, the view was it. I was like, I can stay here.

And your idea of a commitment to her is saying, I disregard what you feel because on the top of your list must be what I want.

Like, we don't really need it.

Something else is missing. Right. But I also, in good relation, I tell my guy friends, like, and This is a quick tip for men who are listening in there. Most men don't understand intimacy and sex anyway. And so they look at sex as sort of this transactional act versus what true sex is, is when there's real intimacy. And most men are afraid of their own intimacy, that they will never have that.

So, of course, a statement like, well, she should just be giving me sex is because this is transactional. but when you have real intimacy and real men who understand what love making is and what it is to connect with somebody and this is both romantic and all it can be aggressive but when there's intimacy involved it makes it better. And so I would encourage men to really understand intimacy.

Period. I was like, I'm working for Oprah, girl.

Like most men, and then I'm gonna give you a tip, when they, you might not know this, but most men don't even touch themselves when they masturbate.

Yeah, sure, let's make this like, this is the first step, you know what I mean? And so when my view got taken away that I thought was the view, I had to reframe quickly and realize that there was a better view. Versus where you were like, no, this is not what I want.

Other than their dick.

They don't touch themselves. They don't touch themselves. Because the focus is here, here, here, and I'm done.

And I'm like, yo, how about when you're doing this, not only if you're engaging in watching porn, which is fine, how about you think to yourself, like, oh my gosh, how intimate this would be if I was with my girl, if I was with my partner, like, touch yourself in these ways. Because what happens is that you get more involved with your body.

Now your mind is connected to the person that you're engaging with. And most men don't know how to do this. So you get stupid ass motherfuckers who say shit like fucking sex has to be on the priority of the list. Now do you want it or not? It's like, girl.

And you're probably bad at it on top of that.

Because it's transactional.

Get the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here.

I'm going to give you a tip that I gave a couple recently, and it's worked.

I tell couples, like, watch each other masturbate.

But also say to your partner, especially for males.

Unfortunately, sometimes you got to give these men like little boys, like let's teach you. Not always, girl, but like sometimes. But say like, while you're doing that, think about how that good would be if I was touching you there. If I would do this. Let them get in the mindset of practicing intimacy with themselves.

And it will help the sex life with your partner.

I thought you were all about fucking. Yeah, exactly. I thought you were all about it. Oh, and now you're all...

You know how many straight guys I know that literally hide that they masturbate from their partner? They're like kids. It blows my fucking mind that grown men wait till their partner walks out the door to fucking jack off. I'm like, what's wrong with you? Have a conversation with your partner about the fact that, like, make this a thing that could be intimate.

Like, I'm going to, like, this could be sexy.

Join me.

I can't tell you how many grown men wait for the door to lock to go do this. Like, I'm 15 years old. I gotta wait. Like, it's just what they've been doing forever. Yeah, forever. I gotta wait. Oh, you're gone? I gotta, like, go in the bathroom. Like, get it fucking together, man. Like, talk about sex and intimacy in a new way. No, for real.

So that you don't end up being somebody who says stupid shit like sex is on top of the list and if you give it to me, whether or not. You know what I mean?

Yeah, mine was like, okay then, well now that I've gotten a taste of this view, I know that there's another view out there for me.

You're bad at it.

Bad at it.

But see, for the flip side is that when I tell men, I'm also like, okay, you should be more active in wanting to make your partner come and make your woman come. But equally, I tell men, you should hold off on coming.

Because again, intimacy, for right now, again, the act for most men is transactional, that it's like, I need to orgasm. Where it's like, and thus, once you get yours, you're not worried about her. So how about you wait? Practice edging. Doing these things, and I'm no sex expert, but I understand the emotional attachment and the mental attachment.

What happens when you say, I'm gonna be committed to not orgasming quickly, to making this a moment that is more intimate, to making it more about me touching and feeling, and then it translates into about us. It translates into you and your woman, yeah. God, he's mad.

A better one. And so it's in those moments of doubt that you just really have to hold on to self. And that's all I did, I just went home and I was like, something's gotta be better.

Girl, seriously, girl.

It just doesn't stop. You've been in a fucking rut for a while.

Move on.

Thank you for having me.

I am going to continue to see you grow. And what I would hope for one day, if I could ask, is that when you are the most famous talk show host in the world, that in your will you will put that you want your ashes on my lawn.

That's the circle of life. Exactly.

At Karamo. See when that name is?

Karamo girl.

Right.

Facebook, Instagram. Name of the talk show, girl. She's turning into Beyonce. She's a one-name artist now.

We could be the same person. You know, we were both born in Houston, Texas at the same time.

Kelly Rowland and I are friends, so maybe I am Beyonce. Who knows? I did it on Lip Sync Battle.

And I killed it.

And maybe that was me trying to let the world know.

And I literally went on, and this is no shade to him, but I went on TV, my best friend's here of 25 years, best friend Trey, and I was like, I saw Ryan Seacrest on TV, and I was like, if this yahoo is doing this shit, I could do this. And I don't even, and I'm not calling Ryan Seacrest a yahoo, yeah, no shade, because I've admired him, I think he's amazing.

Bitch, y'all go gagging 20 years when y'all find out I'm Beyonce.

That would be crazy. In male drag right now.

You can watch Queer Eye. New season comes out December 11th. You can watch Karamo's show nationwide or go on TikTok and Instagram or YouTube, girl.

The clips will be popping.

Okay, thank you.

I get it.

I was like, I know I can get another job, girl. I can host.

You want to hear a funny thing about Grind Secrets that I've never told anybody?

Anything I say, no.

I'm an open book. You can keep everything in there. You'll never get that. So I have this funny joke with my kids that is real now, that I put in my will that when I die, I wanna be cremated, and for them to get my money, they have to put my ashes on Ryan's secret salon. And I swear to God, this is in my will. I'm not even joking with you.

I think I sent my son a copy of it because he didn't believe me.

I'm going to find this for you really quickly.

Hold on.

Okay, so hold on.

This is legit. Hold on here. I'm sorry. I'm doing some autofill for him.

Okay.

That is actually in my will that if I die, my ashes will be on Ryan Seacrest's lawn.

And by the way, I've met Ryan Seacrest. He's a great guy, and he has no idea.

I love that this is where he's going to find out. He's going to find this out right now. Sorry, I just totally went sideways.

Three generations from now, they have no idea what's going to happen when we're on their side.

That was the one. It's him. It's Ryan Seacrest.

Ryan Seacrest had us all in a chokehold for about 18 years. I still love Ryan Seacrest, again. But the chokehold... That he had on all of us going from idol to E. Right, and a monopoly on the hosting gigs. Girl, she said, I'm taking every coin.

Appreciate it.

Yeah, I'm like, that Yahoo, I'm doing that shit. I'm like, girl, I'm getting this money.

I would take a weird way.

I know this invisible string. Because it was the only season because I was so pissed about that final three. Me too. That I literally then was like, she got to win.

Yo, they don't understand what they did. They activated people of color in a way they did not know.

You can be weird with me.

It'll be okay.

I have. I love that. It's really because when you grow up with nothing... The way that I related to my trauma is that I didn't deserve it. And so I knew early on that I didn't deserve the things that were happening to me. And some people fall into a mindset where they relate to their traumas like, this is just me, this is just my life. And I knew very early on to tell myself, I don't deserve this.

And when you know you don't deserve this, it gives you this sort of drive and purpose to know you have to go after something. All through high school and middle school, I was always successful. College, I was always an overachiever because I knew that if my circumstances weren't giving me what I wanted, I had to do the work for myself.

But it started with that shift in my mindset of like, I don't deserve this. And even to this day, I still wake up and I evaluate every week. I end my week, and this is not no bullshit. I end my week asking questions. What happened this week that I don't deserve? And I promise you, it really makes me just, it shifts like people being in my life. It shifts career choices. It shifts everything.

Yeah, I love that. Because people don't evaluate it enough. We feel like that we just have to go with it. Oh, I'm at work. This is what happens. That's so true. This is how it's going. Oh, we've been in a relationship for so long. Yeah. I guess it's just what it is. Yeah, that's so true. No, girl.

We were talking about before. Someone was trying to keep us separate because I said yes immediately. And you were like, bitch, I tried to get you here a while ago.

Yeah, that's so true. Oh, you at work talking to me like you're crazy? Girl, I don't deserve this. Girl, let me see. Let me figure out what we got to do here. Either you got to go or I got to move on.

It wasn't me. We're going to find out who it was.

Girl, you and I are one in the same.

And you're so me, girl. Best friend. Is this not the shit I say? Yeah, all the time. All the time. You sound like me. You're right. If y'all want to know the manifesto of success, girl, just tune in right here. Look at us.

Exactly.

And we're going to fight. Someone's turning red over there, by the way.

And it took off.

No shade. By the way, this is going to sound morbid, but it's not meant to be. I can't wait till you and I are ancestors.

Three generations from now, they have no idea what's going to happen when we're on their side.

Bitch, we are going to be everything.

But literally, us as ancestors? Right. Oh, my God. Yes.

Well, Queer Eye, I've talked about this a little bit before. Queer Eye in the beginning for me was a little bit hard. Really? Yeah, it was. Because when I came in, I had a different idea of what my category was. And I've said this once before. We were in episode two of season one. And episode one, I had done what I do where I went deep. and talk to somebody about their emotional state.

And they started crying. And episode two, it happened again. And literally this person came into our trailer and kicked the door and said, if you make one more mother effing person cry, you are off this show. And it was because the person who had the role before, the category culture, was about exposing people to arts. It was about showing them Broadway and these things.

And I was like, no, this needs to be about mental health. And I was like, that's what I thought y'all hired me for. But this person was like, no. And it was very difficult because I found myself being cut off in having deeper conversations, but somehow I was able to still shine it through.

And then all I remember is that the show ended and all of a sudden, they sang the slogan from, I can't remember what it was, to, you're not crying, I'm crying. And I was like, oh, oh. But you girls wanted me not to make the girls cry. Yeah.