Jay Mohr
Appearances
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Mindy Kaling
Can you please tell the Christopher Walken story? First time I met Christopher Walken, I go to say hi to him. As I'm walking up to him, the first thing he says to me is, you know, I can see you coming. I'm like, because I'm introducing myself. I'm not a Vietnamese sniper working a tree line. Like it's how, no offense, it's how introductions work.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Mindy Kaling
And before I say anything, he goes, you know, I can see you coming. I had my Rottweiler with me. He goes, I can see your dog, too. And I go, her name is Shirley. And he says, who cares? And I thought he cared because he brought it up. And he goes, I got to know what happened to your dog, Shirley Rottweiler. What happened to your dog's tail? It's gone. Where did it go?
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Mindy Kaling
it's okay you can tell me and i'm just standing there like in this driveway going where the fuck is my dog's tail? And then he gets like real close to me and he goes, it would be great to have a tail. And I'm cool, right? So I look back at him, I go, why, why is that? And he goes, come on, if you had a tail, everyone would know if you were angry or upset, they'd see you.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Mindy Kaling
They'd see you coming up the block. They'd say, get back, look at his tail, he's crazy. And I go, well, you probably mean happy. Like people know if you're happy, if you have a tail, you'd wag it because you're happy. And he goes, maybe you and your tail. Yeah, he just cut the ring off on me, right? And then he looked at me like it's my turn to talk.
Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard
Mindy Kaling
I looked down at the dog and the dog's like, nah, not me. I go, would you rather be able to fly or have a tail? That's what I got out. And he goes, a tail, of course. You'd rather have a tail than be able to fly? He goes, you could always get on an airplane with your tail. Yeah.