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Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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That's all.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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I mean, Catherine Hepburn did it.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Yeah, it's to me. It's will and should. I mean, for all the reasons we've talked about. Plus, it's the only shot this very weird movie has at a major award, one of the big five. So, yeah, let's give it.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Sure. We've got Coleman Domingo for Sing Sing. Domingo plays an incarcerated man who finds purpose by acting in a theater troupe. We've got Ralph Fiennes for Conclave. Fiennes plays the cardinal who is managing the process of finding a new pope. We've got Sebastian Stan for The Apprentice.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Stan plays a young Donald Trump establishing his career in real estate and his relationship with the attorney Roy Cohn. And then we have the two presumed frontrunners, Adrian Brody, as we've talked about for The Brutalist. Brody plays a visionary Hungarian architect who moves to America to rebuild his life after World War II. And Timothy Chalamet for A Complete Unknown. He plays Bob Dylan.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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But for him to win, he would have to escape the gravity well of Adrian Brody in The Brutalist, which is the uber traditional choice. You watch that movie and his performance is a series of Oscar clips. You keep waiting for them to cut away to him sitting in the audience and people clapping around. It's impressive, but it's the default choice.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Thank you. I have been trying to make these things connect for ever since I found out how much he likes this very boring movie.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Well, Stephen, you're happy because I pick Coleman Domingo for should win. I think he makes that film a hell of a lot more compelling than it could have been. On paper, after all, it is, let's face it, a feel-good movie about the carceral state. I just get itchy whenever there's any kind of narrative, any kind of marginalized group and the narrative is, well, at least they have Shakespeare.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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You know, I just, that rubs me the wrong way.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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He is the reason that a film that could have been about, you know, this very tidy kind of neoliberal uplift has any real grit in the gears at all. He's the thing that makes it work.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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What a good clip.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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If you think it's daunting, try the books.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Yeah, we've got one of those biopics, A Complete Unknown. Timothy Chalamet playing a young Bob Dylan. The movie follows his rise in the music world. How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? Six. Six is the answer. We've got The Brutalist. Adrian Brody plays a fictional Jewish-Hungarian architect who relocates to the United States after World War II.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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You'd like to win the commission.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Waves? We're calling them waves now.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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Oofta. Okay.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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But see, I think the ranked choice voting is going to help Onora. I think a lot of people feel very favorably disposed toward that film. If they don't rank it first, they're going to rank it second or third. I think the buzz around Onora has been growing. I think this is a real chance for a scrappy little movie like Onora to take it home.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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As did I. I thought I was going to be out here all alone, but I join you, Linda. I'd like to see the Academy rewarding any innovation, any tweaking of the format. And it's not just that it's told through the character's eyes. The use of that could have easily been just a distracting gimmick, right? But it's used so smartly to serve the story and to serve the emotions of the story.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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And not for nothing, this film has a closing montage that's like five, ten minutes long. That also could have been confusing, disorienting, but the director, Rommel Ross, is going back to his experimental film roots. That montage took you by the hand. It guided you along in such a confident and assured way.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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You knew exactly what was happening, which is yet another reason, the fact that we didn't get a nomination for directing or cinematography or editing.

Up First from NPR

Who Will Win at the Oscars

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You know, what are we awarding here? Outstanding Achievement of these 10 films. This is the Outstanding Achievement.

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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Are you becoming positive, Sam?

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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Okay. So is there anything that's been helpful? Have you experienced anything in that room that has been helpful for your lava?

Up First from NPR

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All right. Samantha Irby writes the Bitches Gotta Eat blog and is the author of Wow, No Thank You, We Are Never Meeting in Real Life, and Meaty. She has been a writer and or co-producer for TV shows including And Just Like That, Work in Progress, Shrill, and Tuca and Bertie. Sam Irby. Welcome to We Can Do Hard Things.

Up First from NPR

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Or go. Take what you need and then be like, I think you've taken me as far. I don't want to be fixed all the way. I'm out of here.

Up First from NPR

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Okay, so let's get the cool out of the way right away because what I want to start with, Sam, is our friendship origin story, which is my favorite story in the world. Okay, so Sam and I did an event together once. At the end of the event, I loved her so much. I sent her my phone number and email. Months and months later, lo so many months later, I am sitting in France at the World Cup. Okay.

Up First from NPR

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As you do. As you do. Right. I'm at the soccer as per usual. But it's a big soccer. Okay. Like the biggest soccer. It's the biggest soccer. Like the Super Bowl of soccer. The Oscars of soccer, if you will. Yes. Yes. The Grammys.

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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So like the Tonys.

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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Oh my God, just go with the story. And I get a text, okay? And it says something like the following. Hello, Glennon. I'm sorry to escalate our friendship on text in this way, but I'm an emergency. I'm sitting in a room full of people. And I may have told the people that I'm very good friends with you and Abby. And now they're calling me on it and asking me to call you.

Up First from NPR

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Actually, you wear them to work out and you wear them out to dinner. That is true.

Up First from NPR

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And you wear them under suits and you wear them to bed.

Up First from NPR

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Speaking of dudes in carabiners, I find this part of you very interesting, okay? You approach friendship in a very different place than a lot of people I know. You can be friends. Well, you're friends with a dude who wears a Budweiser belt buckle, unironically. What? Right? Yes. Like... So this is hard for me to do because I don't know. I weed people out.

Up First from NPR

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I guess I believe that people's belief systems, as might be manifested in their belt buckles, are parts of their character. Right. So I want to learn from you in this. Tell me how this works for you, because you can be friends with anybody.

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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So can you please answer your phone and act like we're good friends? I mean. I mean, do you remember Abby sitting there being like, well, now she's our favorite person in the entire world.

Up First from NPR

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Yeah, it's... Don't you wish, don't you wish I was more like that? No, that is exactly how I feel.

Up First from NPR

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Yes. I think that's what I'm usually, if someone's in my house watching wrestling, Sam, which wouldn't happen, but okay. I am thinking, I'm side-eyeing that person thinking, is this person one of my soulmates or not? Right, right. And then when they roll their eyes at the wrong commercial, it's over. You know?

Up First from NPR

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Yes, everyone I'm friends with is on this podcast right now.

Up First from NPR

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We need different words for friends. Yes. We need different words for friends because I don't want to say Bob's my friend because I don't want that to reflect. Right. The next thing Bob says this and then you're like, wait, why are you friends with that dude? Right. Different words. Right.

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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I get that. I get that. Do you sometimes feel responsibility to just always be funny and always be doing the thing with other people?

Up First from NPR

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Speaking of capital F, friends, can we talk about your lady a little bit?

Up First from NPR

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Your lady. Is it Kirsten or Kirsten? It's Kirsten.

Up First from NPR

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Okay. So you two, didn't you meet, did she reach out to you? She slid into your DMs, didn't she?

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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Of course. Of course we were sending pictures. Like we can't believe you couldn't come with us. Here's your extra seat. This game sucks without you. Yeah. Yeah. I've loved you ever since that moment. Okay, so Sam, we want to start this interview with one of our favorite questions, which is this. It was a question that Rachel Elizabeth asked, and it was this.

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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Like that day, did you, or was it a slow burn or was it like?

Up First from NPR

Time to Leave

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Did you have a happy childhood, or are you funny?

Up First from NPR

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I know it's real. Just to Symbiotica, thank you for making my wife so happy.

Up First from NPR

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So what is your life like now? You're in Michigan. You've got the two kids. You do not consider yourself a step-parent.

Up First from NPR

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That's great. Okay. One of my favorite things that you write about is your belief in not FOMO. But JOMO, not the fear of missing out, but the joy of missing out. Okay. And I feel like especially, you know, activities, you said you have finally learned that no one else is ever having a better time than you are. Like everything sucks and everywhere everyone is sucks, right? Never. I would disagree.

Up First from NPR

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I love that you can do it, but never. Never. No, the mix is the thing that should be avoided. Yes. The mix. Yes. Okay. But it's not that it's just the joy of missing out on the event. You have taught us about the joy of missing out on having a take on fucking everything. Okay. This is one of my favorite.

Up First from NPR

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So Sam's talking about or writing about the idea that she's supposed to have an opinion or a take on every single thing that happens in the world. And this is one of my favorite that ever was said. One of the reasons I give a lot of disclaimers is because we give so much weight to what people say who maybe we should not be listening to. I do want to remind people, don't ask me about the news.

Up First from NPR

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I don't watch the news. I haven't read a history book since 1997. I am keenly aware of what I know and what I don't know. One of the things I don't know is anything smart or important that needs to be told to other people.

Up First from NPR

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Well, Sam, your aunt of an experience on this giant world has helped so many of us just find the absurd to make the next five minutes a little bit more tolerable. That's what you do for all of us.

Up First from NPR

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And with that. We can do hard things, love bugs. Like, shut the fuck up. We will see you next time on We Can Do Hard Things. Sam Irby, thank you for this hour and thank you for who you are in the world.

Up First from NPR

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If this podcast means something to you, it would mean so much to us if you'd be willing to take 30 seconds to do these three things. First, can you please follow or subscribe to We Can Do Hard Things? Following the pod helps you because you'll never miss an episode and it helps us because you'll never miss an episode. To do this, just go to the We Can Do Hard Things show page on Apple Podcasts,

Up First from NPR

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Spotify, Odyssey, or wherever you listen to podcasts, and then just tap the plus sign in the upper right-hand corner or click on follow. This is the most important thing for the pod. While you're there, if you'd be willing to give us a five-star rating and review and share an episode you loved with a friend, we would be so grateful. We appreciate you very much.

Up First from NPR

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We Can Do Hard Things is created and hosted by Glennon Doyle, Abby Wambach, and Amanda Doyle in partnership with Odyssey. Our executive producer is Jenna Wise-Berman, and the show is produced by Lauren LaGrasso, Alison Schott, Dina Kleiner, and Bill Schultz.

Up First from NPR

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What went down that you had to get funny for?

Up First from NPR

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It's so interesting because some people have a lot of us have the like, it'll get better. So the optimism we get through because we tell ourself it's going to get better. But your theory has always been. No, I can just make the next five minutes more bearable. Yes.

Up First from NPR

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Is it always a deflection?

Up First from NPR

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Hello, sweet world. Welcome back to We Can Do Hard Things. I think today we'll call this We Can Do Funny Things because we have one of the funniest people in the universe here. The three of us love to high heavens. Yeah. So first of all, I'll just tell you, we have Sam Irby here.