Edie
Appearances
The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers Podcast
Listener Q&A Episode 6
Hi, my name is Edie. I'm from Baltimore. And my favorite Lonely Island skit is Ross Trank because my dad is bald. And my question is, why won't my parents let me say sushi glory hole at school? Bye.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Yeah, I would love that because I know a lot of drinks.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
I've heard from myself. There's like different versions. Right. And at the end of the day, you're going to fall asleep anyway. So.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
I think I do love public restrooms. Girls out at a club, there's nothing better than 2 o'clock in the morning. freaking Destiny's Child on the radio in a girl's bathroom. It's the most fun place on the planet.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
We're having more fun than you guys. I can't tell you, but everybody's so nice. There's infinite tampons. It's just like... That's what I said, heaven.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Everybody's so nice. You just walk in and then drunk girls are like, you look so beautiful. And it's like, thank you.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Do you have a Starbucks name? Do you have a name that you give when you go so that they always get it? I mean, your name's Tom, so I don't know how... They're messing up Shantira left and right.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Drinking enough water and not just because she forgot to drink water earlier.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Ooh, when to arrive, how early to get there? Because... We have to watch the ads?
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
And you know what? You know what? I laughed a little bit.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
We don't know how fast fast was back then. She might have been the fast... She's the only person we know running. If you're the only one running, you are the fastest.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
There might have been... Just by process of elimination.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
You know what? It's always people who don't do sports who are talking trash about people who do sports. You're in a lab and that girl can run, okay?
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Hi, Tom. This is Edie calling in from Alexandria, Virginia.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
It's his fault because the ring had to be too small if she was able to eat it.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Get her a bigger rock. Not even, she just ate it? Not a choke? Not a spit out?
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Well, I work in conservation and climate advocacy, and I like to go birding, spend time outside, you know. Yeah.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
Many folks like to paint the town red, but one woman was truly flabbergasted when everything in her house was suddenly dyed green, including her cat. So, like any American seeking good advice, the woman turned to Reddit.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
She explained that she first noticed her cat's fur taking on a greenish tint before seeing that other items in her home, including her couch, phone charger, and wall, were also changing hues. She took her cat to the vet, had her A.C. and water checked, and even went to the doctor herself for answers and got none.
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WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
She was totally at a loss until one Reddit user asked if the original poster had recently purchased some jeans from Old Navy. Apparently, there is a pair of jeans from Old Navy that are notorious for staining everything green. The woman claimed that neither she nor her husband wore jeans. They were strictly a slacks family.
Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!
WWDTM: Vanessa bayer
But something about the comment irked her and made her suspicious of an affair. She looked through her husband's phone and lo and behold, there were, quote, some sexy Instagram DMs from a woman who wears jeans. He was, in fact, having an affair. Turns out green wasn't the color of jealousy, but rather the color of bargain-priced infidelity.