Donalyn
Appearances
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Because of the biking opportunities? I chose to rent.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Essentially nothing. Yesterday, I drank 12 beers for a video, and it was 1,440 calories. If I had 12 triples, I'd be tripled out of my gourd, but I can't even do the math. It's so small. Triple is born from a desire to blend THC's social buzz with the social ritual of sipping on a seltzer.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Triple is currently available at grocery stores, liquor stores, bars and restaurants in Missouri, Kansas, Iowa, Louisiana, Georgia and Florida and South Carolina.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
i i was uh i was thinking about this thing that happened to me when i was a kid the other day um do you ever like you know when you like wake up in the middle of the night and you're kind of like half asleep while you're going to the bathroom like you like get up to like pee in the middle of the night and you're like not fully there my bedroom window faced out like into like the driveway where all the cars would park i'm explaining what a driveway is
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
and so i was like cars where they do what there were like these lights that kind of like lined the uh it's a runway walkway from the driveway there and it like would kind of backlit the cars whatever what the hell are we doing i'll explain it it's like i just i'm painting a picture for you
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And I was peeing, and I was looking out the window, and I kind of come to, and there's a guy crouched, like, next to the car, like, staring directly at me. And I'm, like, frozen now. Because it's the middle. It's, like, 2 in the morning. Last night? No, no. It was when I was a kid in Maine. Oh. Which is, like... This kid, it'd be one thing if we, if it was here.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Cause like people live here, but when you're in Maine, there's a guy in your driveway. Like, how did he get there? And so he's like crouched and we're in this like stare off. And I'm like, Oh my God. Like, can he see me? Cause it's a little bit lit in my bathroom. Was he peeing too? No, that'd be way more.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And he's like, he's like one leg up on the car, but he's like crouched in this like most like bizarre contorted way. And I'm like, that's so terrifying. And so I like, I'm trying to get out of the window, but I'm like, if I lose sight of him. Then he could like run to the house. I don't know. In my head, it was like, this is a guy that's going to burglarize our house.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And so we stared at each other for literally like 10 minutes. And then I kind of like my vision gets a little clearer. And I was just staring at the tire of the car. And the wheel well looked like a guy crouching. And I had to like do some reevaluating.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
why do this until sunrise i think i just seen that trailer for the movie where it was like you know the guy who's like home alone peeping out of the box and like if they look away he can like move i feel like a horror movie yeah look up like guy in box can't move it's the creepiest thing in the world actually maybe don't google that because It's just like mime videos. Go to images.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
What? As long as they look at him, he can't move. If you open Christmas, you open that up. What are you doing? Returning it. Wait, why don't they want him to get out of the box? Is he bad? I mean, he doesn't look good. I can tell you that much. Rude.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
The guy gave him a box. One of his friends gave him a box and was like, do not take your eyes off this. And then he leaves and he leaves his wife with it. And the guy's like, no!
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Will and I did karaoke the other day in Nashville. What time of the day? Middle of the night. Okay. Did I say day? No, I was just curious. Oh, yeah, no. Daytime karaoke is not... That'd be a good band name. We should try that.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
daytime karaoke yeah i think the b team is out it's kind of like a strip club karaoke k-a-r-o-k-e croak you missed an a i missed another ad yeah um i took my shirt off oh yeah it was sick and then the guy immediately came up with that hey the bouncer was like no
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
did you wait till after your performance or was it no i like put my hand out and will i think knew it was gonna happen because the second i put my hand out a shirt just flies into frame i put it on without dropping the mic somehow which was kind of impressive and i didn't get tangled um it did make there was some feedback as he put it on it was sort of like but um mid-performance continued mid-performance continued lips of an angel
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
which I've never done. I've never done live. I've never done comedy in general, let alone like a live show. Yeah, that's quite an egregious error to not correct. We're also just different guys. And so I said to me, I was like, that's a different guy.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And then I, I was just, what movie is that? Yeah. And I thought I knew the song, but I couldn't keep up with like, cause it's a lot of like verbal, like, didn't she like kind of shit on you? She was like, not her. She was great. And she was like, you crushed it. Like, good job.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I was actually thinking about it in bed last night. Like, that was... Oh, they said it before or after you say?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's really just, like, the banter in the beginning.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I was honored. Did you guys know each other? No. She was just like, this guy probably knows Glinda. Yeah, exactly. She saw my over the head.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Talking to someone who's currently doing karaoke is kind of rude.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That is funny to criticize karaoke.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. I know. We're all talking about how you shouldn't be up there right now.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I was telling Will and Lauren this a couple weeks ago, but when I went home for Christmas, we went to one of our hometown bars. They were doing karaoke, and the DJ sang the first five songs. So he set it up and then just did a personal concert. Was he also DJing? He was supposed to kind of be like delegating and like giving other people time and then he just back to back to back to back to back.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Oh, that's even worse. It's not even like they knew who I was either.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
No. I used to like have my friends actually be doing the DJing and I would stand at the board. I did that in... What college was that at? We were at some... We were in UMass. Amherst, yeah. And the guy was actually DJing. Horrible night. And I was pretending to. I'm really good at pretending to be the DJ. Sort of like a puppet. Yeah. Why was that such a horrible night?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We just got... I just drank too much and then we had to take a party bus back to Boston that night. Oh, yeah. The guys we were with said you and I were having just like a...
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I would I would I think we're both pretty good about holding our tongue Yeah, actually no that sounds like one mention of Ted rip dancing this guy Like you said new dancing joint that guy sucks. I hate that guy Wait, what was I gonna say about? I had a viral. Oh, oh, oh. I was in a DJ super group one time.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Me and my friend Scott. It was called Dorsal. Yeah? You and Scott do a lot together. Yeah. I mean, you know, you live with the guy. You end up doing a bunch of stuff. But the whole thing, we'd go fins up to the crowd. We would DJ like up on the balcony while our friends were down below. And then we'd go fins up. And they'd all go like this. Nice.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
What scenario were your friends feeding into this dilute... They were like, Will needs this. They weren't feeding into it enough, honestly.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I guess I just can't picture it. I've never heard this story somehow. It was just like a pretty big part of your life. No, it was like one weekend. Were you ever in a music group?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
You have to have at least one to have three. That's true. This podcast is awesome.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, Jim Boeheim killed a guy. Fuck him, too. Jim Boeheim killed a guy? Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I work with, all my roommates work at one of the two agents, one of the UTA or WME. You won't say which. They just come, they just come home and two of them are twins and they work at like rival agencies. That's a TV show. And they just beef about it. It's like, it's like the sharks and the jets.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Earlier. My buddy Evan went there.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. He was like, I went to Syracuse. He was like, do you know Jackson Woods? He was like, no. Wait, how old are you?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I lived with an alumni. You guys done any networking? I thought maybe you lived with an alumni. God forbid. When you're a drunk college kid and you get a hold of a piece of information on, like, the coach of the opposing team or, like, a player of the opposing team and do no fact-checking and then just start yelling it at them.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Grace Ryder oh yeah then I don't know her Wait, who am I thinking of? She's like American High, right?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
The curly hair? Yes. Okay, then I just have her last name wrong. Who's Grace Wickham then? Oh, I went to Rollins with Grace Wickham. Sorry. Well, she's great too. I don't think she does sketches. She'd been doing them in private. She's like, how does he know about that?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, we got really carried away with it in high school. It was affecting my studies. Would you prep? Dude, we would go print out. We'd go to Walmart and do... I got really good at Photoshop. I'd Photoshop kids' faces onto... There was this one kid who... I really like that you don't know how to download Slack.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We'd print out these giant things and put them on the glass at hockey games. And there was this one kid who just had an uncanny resemblance to Kim Jong-un but was not Asian. But they looked so... So I put them side by side. Which, if he was Asian, would be a huge no-no. They just looked exactly alike. And so I put that. And one of the other moms was like, that's racist.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And we had to go, he's not Asian. And she goes, oh... I don't know what that is then. I don't know what that is either. I wish I had hockey. Do you probably have hockey too in high school?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Lacrosse was the big thing in college because we didn't have a football team. And I remember we were walking by. The field was like two. What division was it?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, it's like you go D1 or D3. But yeah, D2 is like the kids that... What? There's just not a lot of them, you mean? No, it's like a lot of the D3 teams can beat D1 teams. It's weird. Tufts will play D1 teams and beat them. So it's like... A lot of kids feel like D1 or D3 is more competitive, so they'll go there. And it's, like, oftentimes, like, the academics are better.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. They don't, I don't think either of them own a suit. Apparently that is not a thing at agencies anymore. They all dress like rappers.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
So you'd go to, like, Bates or, like, something to... You can still play lacrosse, but you're probably getting, like, a better education. I always thought, like, ours was, like, a club team, but they, like, hired a coach. Yeah. Well, it's like some club teams are, are huge as well. Like they can like beat, like we used to like play like Florida state and it would be like a competitive game.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
But I remember walking by the fence of the opposing team and saying something to them and just without a thought, because usually they don't, They don't even like listen to you or say anything back. And the kid was like drinking out of a hose. Like they had the whatever. And he just without a thought just soaked me. And I had to be like, oh, like my words. That's like a real guy on the other end.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's way less funny when you have to like go back to your dorm and like change. Putting on a new shirt and be like, that wasn't worth it.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. Without... I think he was... He probably just got an earful from, like, the group 15 yards ahead of me and was like, if this fucking happens... If he says one thing, I'm fucking turning my nose on him. That was when I was doing, like, beer reviews, too. So, like, imagine playing, like, D2 lacrosse and this guy's just, like, chirping your ear off and you're like, is that the guy from TikTok?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That was always odd. You did... Hey, you did it again last night. I did. Came out of retirement. Rick, last night, said the funniest thing... So the reason I got this job was like sitting down and originally was like sitting down and drinking 12 beers. And Rick apparently had never seen those. He's the guy? He's the nicest guy we work with.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We were sitting there and he knew we were about to drink a case of beer. And he was like, have you ever done that before? And I thought it was like a joke. Because I've done it like a hundred times. And I was like, no. And he was like, yeah, it's going to be brutal. And Willie was like, wait, have you not seen the beer reviews? And he was like, no.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
He's like, I knew you were reviewing stuff, but I didn't know it was beers. He knew that you were reviewing items, but he didn't bother.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. I just can't believe you seem fine. I seem fine right now. I think if I had 12 beers last night, I would be not fine.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
The moment I got home from the shoot, which wrapped at like 8, 8.30, so we probably got home at like 9, I was like, oh my God, we have a pod at 9 a.m. tomorrow.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We chugged everything along. They were like getting mad about timing. It was hard. Like they were like, they were like, like Kate was like texting me like, we got to get this moving faster. And I was like, I don't know how to be like drink. Yeah. I honestly, it's, I think it's probably a bad thing that I can bounce back from that. Yeah. You'd like to become worse at that. Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That would hopefully be a thing you're not good at. I've done it. I've just done it a bunch of times.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
A lot of people try and do it with food. I think you need to steer clear of the on-paper hangover cures. I usually wake up, drink as much water as I can. Try and fight through it. I don't think you should. I don't really like taking aspirin or anything. Sometimes that makes it worse. I like a spicy food. Yeah. If I didn't have work... Are you serious? Yeah. Yeah. That's the move. Are you serious?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Once you get over it a little bit... Like a spicy chicken sandwich? Yeah. That's crazy. Once you get over the initial... You need to get through the first hour. Yeah. And then you're fine. If we didn't have work today, I would take an edible... Yeah, that's the real solution. If you just get high, you immediately are not hungover anymore. 12 edibles. 12 edibles.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Take 12 edibles, and then you should be good. Yeah, Anthony Bourdain used to say, smoke a joint, have a Coke, eat spicy Szechuan food, which I don't know what that is, but sounds good. Where do you live?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. Ryan and I were texting like initially about like the possibility of coming. I was like, Hey man, if you're ever, if you're ever in LA, like, you know, we'd love to have you on the pod. He was like, I have really good news for you. I live right next to you. Do you like it?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We are. Brandon. Brandon. We are Brendan. It's true, yeah. The Penn State edge. He comes out of New York.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Why don't you just go along with that? Oh, sorry. You wouldn't know? Sharon Sachs said I did when I was little, but I think... But then she removed it? Yeah. Yeah, I don't really know. What do you mean? She said it when you were just off the cuff? Sharon Sachs once told my mom when I was little.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
This is my friend Scott Haddon's mom.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I very confidently was like, can I get you anything? Like we had access to, you have to, you have to be pretty positive. You have the basic one. If you're going to be like, can I be, please say beer, please say beer. We have, we have ginger ale. We have every soda imaginable in here, but not one drop. We have draft cold brew, but it's left over from the previous tenants.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Why does she have a different last name than Scott? She never took the last name. Do you see Trump's trying to make it so that if your name doesn't match your... If your driver's license doesn't match your birth certificate last name, then you wouldn't be able to vote. So, like... What?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
women who took their husband's last name would no longer be able to vote unless they brought their marriage license so you'd have to like bring like wait is that insane caitlin post i learned so much from caitlin because she hates trump so much that she posts everything bad that he does on a daily basis and i have to be like whoa this guy's on fire what about like like meta world peace ricochet shot what did meta what did meta say it changed last night
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Oh, oh, oh. I thought you were like saying that he was. He's running for president. Metta world peace. That guy's dumb as bricks. Have you heard a Ron Artest interview lately? Remember when he elbowed James Harden in the head? Why are you allowed to do that if it's in a sport? But like if I elbowed a guy on the street, I'd be in jail.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
If you can convince a guy to play pickup basketball, you can assault them. That's a good point, actually. That'd be funny if you're beating the fuck out of a guy, but your right hand is dribbling a basketball, so the cop's like... Okay, once he loses his handle of that ball, your ass is mine. Yeah, or like football too. Especially football. Hitting someone with a hockey stick.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
The cop's like, are you both playing or just you? Both of you playing? Yeah. Yeah, he's playing.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, we flew that in. Where did you fly it from? Oh my gosh, thank you. From Ottawa? Oh, Paige, I saw your doppelganger on the way into work today. I almost said, hi, Paige. And then she turned her, well, yeah. Yeah, that's okay. We got no water. Yeah, dude, the Sisslemans had the really nice ones.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Sisslemans lightsabers? It's like Ollivanders for lightsabers. They had the really nice ones, and they let me and Garrett go in my garage and turn off all the lights and play with them. But they were so nice that you had to kind of be like... Because you're, like, worried about, like, shattering it.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Really? We're, like, almost there.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's the best show I've ever seen.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
You really slammed Ted Danson earlier. I think his new show's dog. What else is he in, though? Wasn't he from The Friends or something?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
He's the bartender in Cheers. He trains Woody Harrelson. Did you know he actually went to bartending school before that? His method. To get good at it. And I watched a video of him. He can curve a glass around the bar. So he would slide it, and it curved and went to the right guy. That's part of bartending school? Pull up Ted Danson bartending. That's just for show.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Every bartending school got that one show off. Ted Danson sliding glass. I used to go to Cheers Bar. Cheers. I've never seen it, though. You used to go to Cheers Bar? Yeah. It's a real place? It's in Boston, yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It doesn't look anything like the bar on the show in the interior.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
All right, wait. Pause it for a second. It kind of looks like it, I guess, but not really. Watch this and tell me Ted Danson still sucks.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Our landlord popped over yesterday. Have you met the landlord? No. Okay, picture a guy who's completely clean, but has the dirtiest hands in the world. That's awesome. And is holding them out like this. He clearly just did god-awful things with his hands. And he walks around and he just goes... And I was like, what do you want me to do? He was like, the roof is fine now.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Pretty sick, right? Yeah, what a horrible pour. That was a good pour.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Although someone told me you pour it like that, you get all the bubbles out, and then they're not in your stomach. Dude, speaking of getting the bubbles out of your stomach, the guy we were with last night, you know, like usually if you chug a beer, kind of get the burps out like incrementally, he would get all of it out in like a 15 second burp after each beer.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
He's the best burper I've ever heard.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's what we're gonna do this episode.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. We often hear about the red flags we should avoid, but what if we focused more on looking for green flags in friends and partners? Lauren, what are some of your relationship green flags?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
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Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
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Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And then I was like, we still on for that wig party on Saturday? She was like, I think we might dial it back to like a pregame.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I was like, it doesn't seem like it's fine. And he was like, tell the boss man the code is like 00, and just rattled one off and then left. I was like, the code for... And then I went and relayed the information to Edge, and I was like, the code is 0054.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
She was like, there's so much planning that goes into it. And it was like, no, there's not. You just get wigs. You just literally just like tell each person to bring a wig.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
i hope her mom doesn't listen to this no she doesn't she's been very addicted to vapes for a long time and so i was like i'm gonna put you on the lucys and it's worked which is good i hadn't vaped in a while and then i you're trying to get back into it no i think i'm gonna get back into vaping this year but i in nashville someone had one and i guess in the like year that i haven't been vaping they got like exponentially stronger games changed
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It feels like someone's handing you a pistol. It weighs like five pounds. It's like a screen on it. I watched a guy watch Joe Rogan clips on his vape one time. And I was like, all right, game's changed a little. But they hurt now. Maybe it's just because I've cleared out any tolerance to it. What sort of pain? It just burned my throat on the way down.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
which i guess is that's good good but oh i i did i relapsed oh yeah oh yeah well did uh dry generate and a couple weeks into february of uh drinking yeah yeah i had my first drink this morning this morning yeah i'm hammered wait yeah so what was your first drink how was it it was a bud heavy Oh. At a Predators game. It was at our bar before the Predators game. Oh, nice. It was great. Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. I mean, no. I wasn't like itch. I wasn't like finally, but then it was fun. I had fun. Was the hangover bad? Not really, no.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's the thing. My tolerance wasn't fucked by it. I wonder how long you'd have to... Is that a thing you just carry with you forever? If a guy hadn't drank for 20 years, do you think he'd have the same tolerance as he did when he was a kid? I don't know. I kept my wits about me. I wasn't like, yeah, I didn't...
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
that's how like drug addicts die is they'll like stop they lose their tolerance and then they try to keep up they try and do the same amount they did when they uh were hopelessly addicted yeah i don't know i was i was it was fun and i was fine i was happy with my foray back into it like it wasn't like i didn't go overboard because i hadn't you know what i mean yeah you were uh You were fine.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Nope. Then we have teach me something, which I have an awesome one. I actually solved a mystery.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We got a code 0054 up there, and Edge is like... fuck really he knows are you sure he's hit five four he pulls out his gun wait no it might have been five three we gotta clear the office he knows the roofer's code wait i like feel so bad that you don't have water no no no no i'm fine i'm so fine I thought about it. There was a giant thing of sparkling lime water.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I was apologizing to Ryan for how much... We've set ourselves up for failure because there are a lot of people I don't want to invite on because I wouldn't feel comfortable being like, do these nine segments.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
He surely has nothing else to do. I texted him yesterday like, I'm so sorry, but these are all... Did it start out as one thing and it's grown into many things? It started out as just business pitches and then for a while we were adding a new segment every week. We've taken a couple out. Yeah. But there was a point where it was like, We've gotten more into bantering before. Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
So if you add an hour of talking to a thing that's already going to take an hour and a half.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Right. I like the idea. 500 word minimum. All right, Lauren. Let's hear some pitches. Pitches. So Lauren's going to tell us some Playmates submitted pitches. You're the guest. You get to pick which shark you're going to be.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Like roofie. I was trying to make a dumb roof joke the whole time. I didn't even think about what you were saying. Sorry.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
What YouTube videos are you watching when you're driving? Falbo, dude. He's like... Is he really? Yeah, it's crazy. Oh, that's bad.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's true. And then they just, like, glance over.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I mean, you can make it like your car has, like, horns or something, right? Oh, yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
No, like, you can make your car have, like, horns. Oh, what?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Oh, you think they were just, like, fucking around with, like, the settings?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I like the way this guy's brain works because he came up with the name first and then was like, let's do both. I love both of those. I do worry about if we launch both businesses at the same time, the confusion.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Like tripping on a thing on the sidewalk.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Or it's like a YouTube video that floats in front of you so that if you trip, you can still brace yourself with your hands and it doesn't break your phone. Yes. I'm just picturing being on the 405 in a car just flying past you with a guy with his eyes are the biggest you've ever seen. He's watching eight YouTube videos. He just drives off the highway. We're not far away. All right. I love it.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, well, we're high level. So we just... So that's not really... Oh, got it.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We can let the... Yeah, yeah, yeah. We can let the, you know, the engineers figure that out. Okay. Yeah, I do like... Like, you'd be... What is that? What? Sorry. You've gunk on you? I'm gunked up. Ooh. You're like, you wake up after a night out. You're like, your check engine light's on. You're like, service light. You're just like, everything's like going haywire. Yeah. Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, but it's... Yes! Thank you. Thank you. Different, you know. It's different. You're not supposed to drink. He, like, he... He's, like, a huge... I, like, claim moral high ground for it. It's weird. He, like, thinks he's better than everyone else.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I'd rather, ignorance is bliss. Yeah. I think if I had that chip, there'd be all sorts of. I feel like if I'm dehydrated, I know I'm dehydrated. Yeah, I think that he used an interesting example. I think it would be more for like the flu. I just don't really want a doctor inside me. Ayo, pause. Am I right?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, everyone says Donalyn. People have been, like, close friends of ours said that at one point.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Uh, did you, do you think Michael Jordan had the flu or was it just, I think it was food poisoning. Cause they, did you hear the story? They should, they, he ordered a pizza and like six guys delivered it. And we're like, that was like, what happened to me? Yeah. My postmates driver handed me the pizza and the tamper seal was ripped off. And he goes, it should be hot.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And I had to sit there for like 10 minutes.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I can see that. For a really short period of time. I used to think I was actually my dentist's favorite patient. And it broke my heart when I found out she says that to everyone. I'm not... I was so... I was like... Yeah. Dr. Vu fucking loves me. What were you... What did you think you were... I used to fall asleep all the time when they put the glasses on. Uh...
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And she would have to, like, when you fall asleep, your mouth doesn't, obviously doesn't stay all the way open. And it just really frustrated my doctor.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Instead of cavities, they were like, just get rid of it. Were they adult teeth or baby teeth?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Wait, why wouldn't they just let them, like, fall out? I don't know. I remember my sister, like, learned the slam the door thing. You know, you tie it.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I think you should get a little thing and glue them on. Is that a shark tooth?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
You should get a grill, but it's just more of your teeth. My sister learned the slam the door thing, and I had one that wasn't loose, but I think she was just like, we gotta try it eventually. And it just ripped a tooth out that was way too early. And my dad was like, whoa! I hate that.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
um i got i got like a fuck i fucked i have like a crown on one of my teeth yeah because i like rotted it to its core what were both of you eating as kids it was so it was yeah i was doing lst uh watching youtube videos as a guy god forbid no me and old mollus found like the stash of
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
gummies in my basement and we took like a whole box when we went and hit we had like a thing under the stairs like harry potter yeah in my basement but like no one ever went in there and we just went in there and would just eat gummies and leave the wrappers on there so my parents like never found them and then one time they they caught on and they were like oh my god will just ate like 4 000 gummies in like a week and they took me to the dentist i had to get my teeth was like rotted
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's such a bad look. Our tap water is not even cold. If I give you a lukewarm thing of tap water, you would probably walk out and do a different podcast.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
oh yeah it's so funny you're like diet as a kid i remember just like waking up yeah going downstairs and just eating like five packets of welch's gummies and then just going to going to school and making everyone's life a nightmare yeah what's your favorite like on your birthday do you get to like pick your dinner or something Yeah, I get to. He's an adult. He gets to make his dinner every night.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We're going to put a picture over here of my world famous chicken parm. He bought the chicken...
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
pre-breaded yeah oh he just heated up chicken you didn't make chicken farm you turned on the microwave i think or the oven maybe i just because it's pre-bread it doesn't mean i didn't add all the fixings and stuff you just put sauce on it sauce mozzarella i made the pasta i made the asparagus okay when was the last time you made chicken parm You're right.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's why I was like, I don't want to do this because I don't cook. I have no ground to stand on. And it looked good. My girlfriend said it was an eight. And I still am proud of you. But you didn't make chicken parm from the scratch. Okay, let's back up. If I had, how far back does scratch start? Do I have to kill the chicken? No, you have to buy raw chicken breast.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
You have to buy raw chicken breast. And then just take ownership of a whole thing of flour? How much chicken parm do you think I'm going to make?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I made it. Just save time. I think it's arbitrary to say when scratch starts.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's my world famous chicken parm. Yeah. I had hammered the leftovers last night. The chicken parm leftovers? Yeah, I came home. I had Lucas drive my car home, parked it. Both of the spots were taken in the parking garage. Instead of leaving it on the street, I just told Lucas to leave it in the middle of the parking garage. I'll show you. We'll put a picture of the note here.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Someone left a note on my car and says, park, you little shit.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
No, I was off to the wall. People do it all the time. But they recognized my car. And then by the time someone saw it, both of my spots were open. So it looked like I just pulled in the parking garage and was like, fuck it. Threw my keys away. Yeah, it was terrifying. I used to park in this girl's spot because we just didn't have enough. She didn't have a car yet. So I'd park in her spot.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And then she got a car. And obviously I didn't know that. And so she left a very nice note that was like, hi, I have a car now. Please stop parking here.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It happens every, I don't think you're, like, allowed to have an office. I think that's a building thing, yeah. Yeah, like, make the people be here if there's no water to drink.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And then there's like, there's like hieroglyphics at the bottom. Like, I don't know what it. Do you have it?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
it could be a language we speak you have it well it was this morning oh yeah i have it somewhere it's probably still in my car but um it was like they're like it looks like maybe this is like c15 so they like wrote what spot they park in so it's like park you little shit and then like sign like almost like being like i'm not afraid to tell you who i am like you know where to fucking find me c15 anytime anywhere pussy
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We are stoked to continue our partnership with Ricky. The best canned alcoholic beverage on the market just got bigger and it got better.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
They've just launched their 24-ounce Big Boys for you big backs out there with three shots per can, which is absolutely absurd. The flavors are all your favorite cocktails packaged in glorious flavors.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
resealable cans get three times as drunk for under four freaking american dollars baby you know what i'm just i'm gonna say it lauren i don't care cancel me if you want i think size matters uh this can is literally the size of my freaking face oh what are your favorite flavors
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I think what's so great about this one is you can like pop it open, but then close it back up. Because look how freaking ginormous this thing is. I can't finish this.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
for a very long time was like i can't get it on my phone or computer and we're like what it was on it was the perfect crime was that a storage thing or what do you mean you can't get it's not it's blocked i still can't get it to update his i looked into it he has to update his mac os what do you want what os are you on one behind
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Next time you know what to do. Wait, they'll kick you out of your table?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Oh, that's crazy. Oh, because I guess you could just make a reservation for a bunch of people to get a nice table and then just have the booth to yourself.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I kind of like that. I like that a lot. Or I feel like it would turn into a lot of single people and stuff.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. like this a lot i like this a lot i do think it would get overrun with like creeps though by creeps like the type of guys it's like like don't have friends and they're like yeah mind if i join also i like it's still like one person has to put their card down
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
You take the tip. I like that a lot, though. Yeah, we're just like, yeah, you can do it through the app and be like, I want to go here if a spot of like like a really high end restaurant.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. All right. What is the worst part about, um, Getting too drunk when you're out at a bar. Pissing your pants and having the bouncer tell you you're soaked.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's the answer. That is the answer. This is a person for hire. You put a patch on and it tracks your BAC. And when it gets to... If it starts to get up to like the... The level where you might be starting to embarrass yourself, he'll come to the bar and he'll see if you're embarrassing yourself. And if you are, he'll do something way worse.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
So that's the only thing people talk about the next morning is like, remember that guy that showed up and like pantsed every... I don't know. He can do whatever he wants. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
And it just deflects all the... all the bad vibes to that guy.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
They don't know that you paid this guy. So he'll come in, and if you're about to say something embarrassing, he'll jump on your table, break it, and get kicked out. And then it'll also be a reminder to you, be like, oh, if he just did that, I need water.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
poops all over the ceiling and like water please the guy the guy comes in you said you said guy that that ran and pooped on the bar like hand rusty a water before he did it and he did my gatorade and then rusty went home what's dude i swear i've seen that guy it's like we start to catch on like dude every time rusty gets drunk that guy does something crazy little elf runs in and was like rusty was still a huge liability but also that guy pooped that was weird but let's go back to rusty
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's so funny. Willie? Human backboard. It's a basketball game for two people where you put it on.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Not to put myself down, but what kind of documents do I have?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
You're also assuming these guys are making every shot.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So you like it? I love it. Yo, dog. Yo, dog. All right. Should we do our prank call segment? Oh, my God. Permitting division of the building department. Ryan, if you're not familiar, we pretend to be guys from this fake bureau of government called the permitting division of the building department. Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
and we tell people that maybe their fences are too high we basically have kids submit their parents that are worried about something on their property and then we call it's a really minor hoa okay yeah um we told one guy that like he built a deck and it wasn't i guess like he didn't tell the county about it and so we said we were gonna have to turn it into a porch and bring it down on a level and put it in the front yeah i gave a room down there he was like no i
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
My parents recently had a garage built and it's abnormally tall in my opinion. They've done research and gotten multiple professional opinions because there are weird and strict garage laws in our neighborhood for some reason. Can the permitting division of the building department please call my mom Sarah and tell her it's too tall for the city laws slash regulations?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
If she doesn't answer, please call my dad Eric.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
She has been a playmate for a while. Can you Google how to say Hennepin County, Lauren? What's your favorite artist?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I'm calling because we've gotten a lot of complaints about the garage you had put in. It's quite tall, actually, far exceeding the legal limit for the height of a garage. So we are going to have to come and trim a few inches off the top. I'll send someone out some hedge trimmers and we will take them down. All right. Take care.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Okay, fine. Jesus. No, I'm talking about him. 3-2-3-2-3-2-3-2. You do it. No, no, no. I'll do it next week. Okay. I don't believe you.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's fun. You could have one, but we don't have any.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We also have hats, but we don't have any for you. Sold out of hats. Oh, really? Nice. Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We're like, what? I solved a mystery. Your hands were totally pruned. Okay. Have you seen that nature guy? He does all the podcasts and tells stories about his travels. I think he has a show on Nat Geo or something. He was saying he solved the Loch Ness Monster thing. And I believe him. Did you know that the Loch Ness Monster probably was just a whale's penis? Yes.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
whales will like go invert i'll pull we'll pull it up here in a second or just google there's a whale in lake loch ness like it's not a lock it's a late or it's a or sorry it's not a lake it's a lock which is like a they can get into the they can come in but um and they basically sometimes they'll like breach upside down yeah look it's literally just so at loch ness monster is quote obviously not just a whale penis
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Sure. Can you hear your laptop when it's running? If I... So... It depends on how many things I'm trying to do. If I'm trying to do more than one thing on it, it sounds like an aircraft carrier. But if I'm just typing away on the Notes app, I mostly only use my laptop for the Notes app and Spotify.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Wait, just go to the image and let me tell the story. Go to the image. So as you can see, they look identical. Yeah. When the sun is setting, you see this giant pink serpent leave the ocean. That's a whale penis? Yeah, you're going to be like, that's the Loch Ness Monster. You're right, yeah. Wait, what is... Can you look up Loch Ness?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's weird. It's kind of aesthetically crazy. I thought you were going to say it's weird.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It looks like a tongue. I bet it feels crazy. Wait, can you look up Loch Ness?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
What? No, I meant to touch, not inside of you. Jesus. no like the lake like i just want to see what the geographic it's not a lake it's a lock that's what i mean i'm it's not a lake why i don't know lock nest just don't put monster okay oh yeah it's a lock in scotland can you look at yeah i know i don't want i want to know what that means i'm curious look at the map i want a map oh my god
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's basically like the ocean bleeds into the land. Oh, this is the lock. Yeah. Gosh. The ocean bleeds into the... Wait, scroll out. That was a cool way of saying river, man. Yeah. It's like a river. Kind of. Kind of.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Not really, though. That's actually really... I definitely thought it was a lake.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
No. But yeah, so we solved it. So whales are getting in there. Kind of looks like a lake. I'm seeing lake. This?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It bleeds in. I mean, a lake can be connected to that ocean. Lake cannot be connected to the ocean. The Great Lakes are connected to the ocean. What are they fed by? By like... Like eventually. They're fed by like rivers. Yeah, that's what I think. But yeah, the Loch Ness Monster was a whale penis.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Pretty damning stuff, right? Yeah, what about all the... You don't... that was like vice. Yeah. The same guys that go to like dog shows on acid. Yeah. And you, I can't believe all these people saying they get paid out for PTO. Oh yeah. Wait, Willie and I got in a huge argument and he was like, so he was like definitively you're wrong. And then all the comments were like, no, my company does.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
If you don't use PTO at the end of the year, they get paid.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
They'll pay you out for your PTO. And Will was like, no one's ever done that. That's not a real thing. And then all the comments are like, no, my company does that. I mean, I think they're all lying.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That'd be such a weird thing to lie about. I know. But you're getting the spirit, though, which is even when you're proved wrong. My whole thing is even when you're proved wrong.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Bomba. I just want to be clear one thing about the PDO. I meant at the end of each calendar year, not when you leave the company. Because some of the companies are like, when we leave the company. Yeah, but some of them are at the end of the year.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yes. It is a Notes app that I use. It's a piece of paper that plays music. It's a piece of paper.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's true. Yeah. Was he a pan for?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Wait, what? Oh, he's going to be like, it's for cooking.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's for cooking. He keeps getting us with the, he got really into it. What's a hen weigh? And he'd be like, oh, like three pounds. I can't believe you ruined it. You kept paying for me more than once a week. All right, Willie, teach us something. Teach us something. I've been reading all about JFK, so it's a JFK fact. E. Howard Hunt, who was one of the guys in the Watergate scandal. Yep.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
They recorded it. Do you think he was just trying to get people to stop talking about Watergate? I was like, how is this not the biggest thing ever?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
We're just, like, telling him, like, you did this so that they could get, like, write a book. Like, his son's, like, put... You know what I mean?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Insane. Yeah, I want to do that. Like, say something...
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
yeah or say i'm gonna spend the rest of my life coming up with the most complex riddle in the world and then have that be my last words so my kids and grandkids are gonna everyone's like i don't know he was off his he was off his meds um that'd be his dude we uh a fun theory i came up with last night is that lee harvey and oswald were three different guys and that's where all the that's why there were three bullets so fast oh interesting yeah
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Can you zoom in a little bit? It's a lady who's like a ghost and then Pinky Bob's going to enter the frame. and um she kind of just i don't really know what to tell you i don't know why this came on my fucking reels just play it okay i feel like this is gonna get like copyrighted
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah, so... Will and I like to use this opportunity as just like we make a guy listen to all the things we're thinking about. Yeah, exactly. But yeah, we were talking about this earlier. You were part of this conversation. I don't know why Will teed it up like it was a secret thing. No, it was just that shit you were saying. So where'd Lauren go? Oh, fuck. She's probably getting water.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Why is the beginning a Journey song, and then it's a rap, and then it's a song? Also, who's the woman in the background, the thing in the background? I think Pinky. I did not like that. Everyone loves that. I'm going to slack this to Brian because my thing is not working. All right, this one says my brother made me call EMS for his first edible.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Dude, the girl... That's hysterical. The girl EMS person was like, do you have the munchies? She was like cracking up.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
He has access to the strangest materials. Is he an artist, you think?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Is that a carrot? Yeah. Oh, he's a banana lunch. This is, like, something you would, if you were, like, a parent, you would, like, come home to your kids. Like, they built something on the wall, like, that flings vegetables across. Oh, that one's sick.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Everything that he likes is, like, kind of phallic.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
These are all just a thing that a child would do if you left them alone. Yeah. We put a pickle on the screwdriver. Me after one Coors Light.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
All right, Ryan, you are the guest, so you get to choose.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Okay. Tee it up for us, Willie. These are ways to start a best man speech. We all actually hated Katie when you two first met, but she's kind of growing on us.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's like an open dialogue. Uh, I, I think hit it boys. And you pointed the groomsmen and they're all like, think that they're supposed to do something.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
But yeah, we were talking about this earlier, and I think we've probably got enough playmates that there's got to be one weatherman that listens, right?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
What would the stats be? I don't know. I'm picturing like a, like sort of a video game intro where it's like a projector screen. It's you like rotating. All right. I like that. Should we do names we would use if we started a band? Yeah. I think we should say band names that don't exist. These are band names that don't exist. Hungover Daydream.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Hydrogen Mom. The Secret Sisters.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Nice. I like that. It is really close. Those words are so different.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
That's really good. First class pirates. I like that. All right.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Ryan, thank you so much for coming on. Do you have anything you want to plug?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
If you're listening to this podcast, you are going to love the other episodes.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Where did the name Crab videos come from?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I like how in the last waning seconds of the podcast, we asked him a question. Where are you from?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Whose personality are you going to steal, Lauren? oh no don't start with me yeah those guys are awesome go watch the video if you i crab videos is my personal favorite my second favorite sketch channel because i'm legally obligated to say that's close yeah yours are will's world 69 will's world 69 still live not live okay yeah inactive we'll bring it back one day
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
um all right this is our final segment where we say whose personality we're gonna steal for the rest of what what episode is this is monday or wednesday i'm gonna come out on monday this is a monday whose personality you're still for the rest of the week willy ryan i thought ryan was gone you want me to go boomerang okay um for this rest of the week i'm going to steal um that irish guy because i think i'm playing darts next week oh
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
What do you mean you think you're playing darts? What do you mean that Irish guy? The guy who's like... They're all like...
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Oh, where his body is smaller? Yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
He's like the go-to darts, I think, now.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yes, it's Saturday. I'll come if it's Saturday. Come on. I already got people excited about it.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yes, I did. Who? He posted on story.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I'm going to steal Emily Osmond's personality. Oh, the podcast producer. Because I am going to... What? Who's Emily Osmond? She plays Lily in Hannah Montana because I'm going to be Lauren's sidekick at her wig party, which is happening on Saturday.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Every time we have a guest, they do Okafor.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Oh, is he really? He's back in the league. Yes, yes. Jaleel Okafor. I haven't thought about him since, like, the last Bucks game.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
You want to be on my trivia team?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
This is the part of the podcast where we make a bunch of plans.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I just thought he's got some NBA knowledge, so I was like, you know, that could be an asset. Yeah, I'll be the NBA guy. We got a question wrong about the Jazz last week.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
What was the third team in the Luka trade? I put the fucking Nuggets.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It was that guy with three names. I don't know. I knew that Danny McBride was involved. Sorry. Nope. Danny McBride.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Danny McBride got traded for the Jets.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Oh, my dad's Mitt Romney? Yeah. No, but she's seen New Girl, and that's like a plot of New Girl. What? Is he pretends to be Tug Romney? Oh, yeah, yeah.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
He lives there. But what we were saying earlier, if you're a playmate weatherman or a weatherwoman, Let us know the answer to this question. If there's a snowstorm, you can very clearly be like, there is six inches of snow on the ground. But if you're watching the news and it's raining, they go, we're getting eight inches of rain. But that is completely dependent on what cup you're catching it in.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. It would have to be outrageous.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
So it's like, if I'm catching it in a sheet pan, I have one inch of rain. But if I catch it in an Erlinger flask, is that a thing? Whoa.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
actually for once this isn't even an argument i think we're all on the same side of science just trying to figure it out i guess it's maybe within whatever radius that they say it's going to be raining in right that doesn't make any sense at all container oh with when they say it's like one to three inches yeah it's like well if i'm catching it in a sheet pan yeah well what if they what if it's like the radius where it's gonna rain and then they imagine if there's like a wall around that uh that's that's just an idea
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It kind of is an Erlingmeyer flask.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Good find. Show me. Wait, we already did it. Yeah, but. Well, I wanted to try one. Oh. Malachi Corley.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Like a Pokemon? Oh, fuck. That wasn't even close.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Fuck man, you just like slammed him for no reason. What the fuck did Ted Danson do to you? You know what I'm talking about? It's like a murder mystery.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Wait, what happens? It's like critically acclaimed. Like the preview. Yeah, look, A Man on the Inside is one of the best shows on TV right now. Oh, when you're hovering over it. Yeah. Dude, whenever I'm scrolling to find somewhere, I feel like I'm in a race against time because I don't want to watch the preview. Is that on purpose? It's the most annoying thing in the world.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
I was going to say, tell them about the thing where they just refused to put your name on the live show thing. Oh, yeah. You came to the live show. Yeah, yeah. Wait, which one? In New York? In LA.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It makes you scroll through them faster because it's like... Oh, they know we hate it. I think the thought is they would be able to hook you. Oh, that's actually... Wow, I'm going to stop.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Have you gotten to meet any other cool NBA guys because of your dad?
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
yeah like well now it's a lot of just people in the front office which is like more so what i'm into yeah lauren his dad was finals mvp in 2006 i don't i don't know anything about okay imagine the the team that wins the championship his dad was the best player on that team he dunked on alan iverson to seal the win that's it sounds very cool sorry we're gassing your dad he talks about it a lot yeah we have a mini hoop and he'll he'll reenact it that's so funny yeah
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Are you joking? What? Should I not have brought that up? Yeah, that'd be like, remember your dad's darkest day at his office? I mean, I feel like he owned it. Like, he just kind of stuck both fingers through. Ugh. His dad gouged the guy's eyes out in the finals.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
It's awesome. It'd be funny that his chants were so good at the game that he was like the first fan finals MVP. He made such a big impact on the game.
Will & Rusty's Playdate
how to ruin a best man speech w/ ryan micho
Yeah. Well, originally we landed on that we were going to say he was a Kennedy. And then we were going to say he was a Romney. And then I realized that that's a plot of New Girl and you've seen New Girl. So you probably would have put that together. So what are you up to? Just tell me everything, man.