Desiree Burch
Appearances
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
After enough spiders crawling up my nose, I won't be afraid of spiders anymore. I'll just be complacent with my imminent demise.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Yeah, and if he had any comic acumen, he would have been like, I had to sacrifice having working class friends. It would have been like, actually, we're missing out.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Why did he have to leave a D-Day commemoration to do that? Like he was the prime minister. They couldn't bump it back at all?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Yeah. Does that sound like a bukkake?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
And you're like, you do not need to know, mother.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
It looks so nice. Is it tensile? I guess it would have come in a bag, but like, I didn't know you could just be like, hey, I didn't use my Christmas decorations here, charity shop. Like, that seems like a... I don't know.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
And we know how y'all feel about them baked beans. You want them everywhere, any place, any time.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
No, I didn't. I didn't. Just the most loathsome leader. Just the most loathsome one. Which is, like, 419 Jaeger bombs. So...
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Would you like to go ahead and take that? I don't know what it is, but it hit me right in the face, Liz. I feel like it's Christmas.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Yeah. Or was it when you stopped believing in Santa because everything is destroyed? When you're like, that's it, I've given up on life. Yep.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Well, I'm going to fuck with the world because it means I'll get whatever I want for my, you know, like, you know, he makes money off of, you know, working different government deals and whatever to just rake up more money for like the things that he wants to create. And like, literally whatever millions he's giving to reform is like the equivalent of Rishi Sunak's 1,000 pound charity donation.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
But what he gets for that is just carte blanche to walk in and be like, here's what you need to do. Because like, there were a lot of things that I'm coming to understand as someone who's only been here for a decade now that are like, you know, common practice, but not written down anywhere as law.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
And it's very easy for all of the stuff that like, you know, MAGA wants to do in America to start coming over here. There are plenty of people who want that. Although, MAGA is not as good a acronym.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Is this an elf one?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
But it's also the kind of corruption you expect. Like, that puts the average voter at ease. Like, oh, they're just taking free shit. They're not, like, having a party in the middle of a plague or, like, doing weird sex stuff, you know? Like, I mean, it's wrong and it's messed up and there's a scale of, like... Taking free shit leads up to like, you know, and here's Elon Musk.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
But, you know, on the other hand, you're just kind of like, yeah, that's what politicians do.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
They call you Liz Swagbag, bitch.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
This is now going to be used as evidence.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
You haven't lit it on fire yet.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Who were all the people who voted for Kemi then if they were leaning their votes over to Like, they were genuine people who wanted Kemi Baden. Oh, there's definitely people who wanted Kemi, yeah.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Is this not basic politics? I mean, you know what I mean? It's something Nancy Pelosi always talks about because I know how to count. And I walk around and I'm counting things and I figure out what needs to happen because I know how to count. What are these guys doing where they don't know how to count?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Doesn't make you feel great about it. Yeah, well, yeah, yeah.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
I mean... It's hard to feel any more hopeless than I did in 2016, except for the fact that everybody I know who is liberal feels that way. There was a very stark sort of reaction to like, let's get back in there and fight because it's like, it doesn't work. Please stop telling us to do the same thing that has clearly been proven not to work. Kamala did have one thing right. We're not going back.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
And in terms of we're not going back to politics the way they used to work. Like, you know, and ultimately we were the establishment in this case. I mean, Brian Eno called this right after the 2020 election and saying, basically, I don't know why people are celebrating.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
You know, the Democrats are going to have to take the heat for everything the Republicans did, because that's just like, you know, Trump was like, oh, look what I did for the economy. No, Obama did that. But nobody's going to give him any credit for that thing. Everyone's just going to be like, forget that guy. This guy's great. He leaves. There's a bunch of mess to clean up.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
You spend four years cleaning up the mess and everyone's like, how come everything's messy and expensive? No one in America knows that the American economy is the envy of the world because everybody went through the plague and also corporate greed. Full stop. You know, and like nobody was able to point that out. I mean, Starmer and the Labor Party and Trump did the same thing of say nothing.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Trump is exceptionally good at saying nothing very loudly over it and just look there, look anywhere. But essentially, it's just like say nothing and let everybody be mad at the people who are standing behind the podium right now and then come back into power. I mean, the people in my life that I know who are like, but what about the price of gas? Don't know how much gas costs everywhere else.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
But what about the price of cereal? Well, I mean, we don't need that much cereal. But the president doesn't wake up every morning going, hey, let's make eggs eight bucks and cereal nine bucks today. Because it's like, no, those are the corporate overlords that are now in the cabinet in America.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
And also you can't manage that into success. Like it is broken. You need someone with a new idea. And is the problem that any new idea is going to be pissing off the billionaires who are profiting off of the NHS not working as well so that things can get privatized? Like, I mean, who has ideas?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
that aren't going to be like, and someone's going to get rich off of this because that's part of the problem.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Absolutely. It was overwhelming. It was a bit much. Like after you get that much spaff in your eye, you're like, I get the point. Why are we still doing this now? Like this is still happening. Yeah.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
But like legitimate question, because I don't know the answer, but do we think those kinds of leaders could get elected in this time? Because it does seem like it is sort of just populist leaders who come to the fore and complain about the status quo long enough to get into office and to make things worse for everyone and better for themselves.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
And it does feel like this particular government might be priming everybody for a big swing back to something like reform when they're in the middle of cleaning up a mess but not actually progressing anything forward. Yeah.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
I guess nobody likes a try hard, but, like, could you try it all?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
I mean, how much it's trickled down. He's like, oh, he hears that at the gym two times a year when he goes. And he's like, oh, I know what they'll want, what they'll really, really want.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
If you like me, let me know. Let me add a shadow. Got 21 days before they gotta go. 21 days to go. 21 days to go. I mean, genuinely. Come on, that's good.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
If anyone could kill that song, it would be Kim Starmer. Can you imagine? You must not know about me. Don't do it.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Everyone should hear that a little bit more, I think.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Was that him Googling at the end how to sing?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
He got bored of lip syncing the song. Every time, we know he's not singing it.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
No one's going to be playing that from a pedicab in Soho this Christmas season.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Oh my God, it's been a bukkake of joy. Of holiday cheer. Thank you so much.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
I'm like, wait, where's the line? Not anymore!
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
I'm happy. It's sparkly in the studio. I might sing later. What are they talking about? I'll ask my older brother.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
It was hard to watch a slow-mo train crash. Although this one was a bit better, at least the earlier one, because, you know, we kind of swing the other way. But was there ever any doubt that we weren't going to be complaining about this government in a matter of months?
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
As most stinky things do. LAUGHTER
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
She seems like she wakes up every day and like huffs something. And it's like, they got mad at me for tanking the economy. Imagine that.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
rude, did he throw a bukkake in there somewhere that I missed in the quote where he said you want to shoot all black women because of, sounds like someone who just wanted to kill black women and needed to find a famous one to point to to be mad at because bleh.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
So he's like literally is killing your grandparents so he can hate black women and say they should be shot.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Yeah, well, thank you so... Yes. Yes. I was just one of the animals that was like, what the hell is this? We don't have enough weird things happening in here. You see, there's a camel. What? No, this is, thank you so much for making me remember this terrible, terrible year. I was just trying to race to the end, but yeah, let's look back because we got to do that.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
Can I just say, that clip gets talked about all the time about like, oh, and he's just getting rained on and rained out and how embarrassing it is. As an American, we're all like, that's what we expect this country is. It's just a sad little man in a suit talking about boring, depressing things while getting what looks like fraternity hazed with water. And they're like... He's the prime minister.
Pod Save the UK
Just Stop Politics - 2024 Wrapped! w/ Desiree Burch and Liz Bates
They can't afford an awning to go over him. Like, what the hell's going on with this country? Like, it's so hard to look at it without being like, yeah, that's kind of what we imagine you all do, just make speeches in the rain on a random street.