Daniel Pink

So you say, oh, okay. I regret that I married Bob, but at least I have these two great kids, okay? So you find the silver lining, okay? It could have been worse. I could have married Bob and not had any kids. So at least make us feel better. Now, there's another kind of counterfactual, if-onlys.

Exactly. That's the point. So we're not perfect organisms at all. We're not perfectly efficient, but there are adaptations that we've had. So you have to figure like, why does something that make us feel bad, why is it everywhere? It must do something. It must have some benefit to us, right? And you got it exactly right.

Exactly. That's the point. So we're not perfect organisms at all. We're not perfectly efficient, but there are adaptations that we've had. So you have to figure like, why does something that make us feel bad, why is it everywhere? It must do something. It must have some benefit to us, right? And you got it exactly right.

Exactly. That's the point. So we're not perfect organisms at all. We're not perfectly efficient, but there are adaptations that we've had. So you have to figure like, why does something that make us feel bad, why is it everywhere? It must do something. It must have some benefit to us, right? And you got it exactly right.

Exactly. That's the point. So we're not perfect organisms at all. We're not perfectly efficient, but there are adaptations that we've had. So you have to figure like, why does something that make us feel bad, why is it everywhere? It must do something. It must have some benefit to us, right? And you got it exactly right.

Exactly. That's the point. So we're not perfect organisms at all. We're not perfectly efficient, but there are adaptations that we've had. So you have to figure like, why does something that make us feel bad, why is it everywhere? It must do something. It must have some benefit to us, right? And you got it exactly right.

That's an upward counterfactual, where you can imagine how things could have gotten better, could have been better. So you say, oh, if only I had married Fred instead of Bob, I would be living in a nicer community. I would have a happy marriage. I would be financially secure, et cetera, et cetera. You imagine how things could have been better. Now, if-onlys make us feel worse.

That's an upward counterfactual, where you can imagine how things could have gotten better, could have been better. So you say, oh, if only I had married Fred instead of Bob, I would be living in a nicer community. I would have a happy marriage. I would be financially secure, et cetera, et cetera. You imagine how things could have been better. Now, if-onlys make us feel worse.

That's an upward counterfactual, where you can imagine how things could have gotten better, could have been better. So you say, oh, if only I had married Fred instead of Bob, I would be living in a nicer community. I would have a happy marriage. I would be financially secure, et cetera, et cetera. You imagine how things could have been better. Now, if-onlys make us feel worse.

That's an upward counterfactual, where you can imagine how things could have gotten better, could have been better. So you say, oh, if only I had married Fred instead of Bob, I would be living in a nicer community. I would have a happy marriage. I would be financially secure, et cetera, et cetera. You imagine how things could have been better. Now, if-onlys make us feel worse.

That's an upward counterfactual, where you can imagine how things could have gotten better, could have been better. So you say, oh, if only I had married Fred instead of Bob, I would be living in a nicer community. I would have a happy marriage. I would be financially secure, et cetera, et cetera. You imagine how things could have been better. Now, if-onlys make us feel worse.

The benefit that it has, it helps that if we treat our regrets properly, it helps us do better. And not only a little bit and not only on a few things, but a lot of bit on many things. And here's the key. If we reckon with our regrets properly, don't ignore them. When we feel a regret, we don't put our fingers in our ears and say, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't hear anything.

The benefit that it has, it helps that if we treat our regrets properly, it helps us do better. And not only a little bit and not only on a few things, but a lot of bit on many things. And here's the key. If we reckon with our regrets properly, don't ignore them. When we feel a regret, we don't put our fingers in our ears and say, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't hear anything.

The benefit that it has, it helps that if we treat our regrets properly, it helps us do better. And not only a little bit and not only on a few things, but a lot of bit on many things. And here's the key. If we reckon with our regrets properly, don't ignore them. When we feel a regret, we don't put our fingers in our ears and say, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't hear anything.

The benefit that it has, it helps that if we treat our regrets properly, it helps us do better. And not only a little bit and not only on a few things, but a lot of bit on many things. And here's the key. If we reckon with our regrets properly, don't ignore them. When we feel a regret, we don't put our fingers in our ears and say, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't hear anything.

The benefit that it has, it helps that if we treat our regrets properly, it helps us do better. And not only a little bit and not only on a few things, but a lot of bit on many things. And here's the key. If we reckon with our regrets properly, don't ignore them. When we feel a regret, we don't put our fingers in our ears and say, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I don't hear anything.

But here's the dirty little secret. If-onlys make us feel worse, but they also help us do better in the future. And they help us do better in the future because they make us feel worse.

But here's the dirty little secret. If-onlys make us feel worse, but they also help us do better in the future. And they help us do better in the future because they make us feel worse.

But here's the dirty little secret. If-onlys make us feel worse, but they also help us do better in the future. And they help us do better in the future because they make us feel worse.

But here's the dirty little secret. If-onlys make us feel worse, but they also help us do better in the future. And they help us do better in the future because they make us feel worse.