Carol Leifer
Appearances
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
So whenever I'd see a group of young guys walking in, I was sitting in the bar at the Improv and I'd see them, I was like, those are the guys that are gonna heckle me. And this happened over and over. I would have trouble with these guys. I really didn't know how to come back to them. It was tough. And one of the male comics took me aside. He said, I see the trouble you're having.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And he said, I think I have the solution for it. I was like, fantastic. Lay it on me. And he was like, all you got to say to these guys is, great guys. So where are the dates tonight?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, they're parking the car, the gals, and that would immediately shut them down. So he knew as a guy what the Achilles heel was going to be. So that's why it's good for men and women comics to talk to each other because sometimes you don't have the correct perspective not being that sex.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I think that, and that's what I still find fascinating about standup, the audience sees so much that you don't see. And when they see you're not confident, or they're a thousand percent, they pounce on you. And I think the guys, I wasn't, my act wasn't as strong as it could be.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And I don't think I took command of the stage enough that you need, that someone feels like, I don't want to, I don't want to get involved in this.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
No choice. No choice at all. So he told me about... He said, during the summers, I go to these nightclubs, Catch a Rising Star, and anybody can go on audition night. And I've gone on. It's a lot of fun. I was like, oh, I'd like to do that too. So... And we were watching comedians at the time, but it was like Leno on Merv Griffin, Richard Lewis.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, I think it's like when I see people heckled, they're, you know, it's the thing that in the ether that we can't, kind of put our finger on. They sense this person is weak.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
It was kind of like those were the guys that were on TV. So I was like, oh, I want to go to these audition nights.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I don't know if you know or not, but I had kind of a big change of life sexually. You know, I was straight.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, liked men. Yeah. I still like, you know, intellectually.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
What was that? I just had this kind of hankering. I was like, I really want to have sex with a woman. It really became my kind of thing. That's what I want to try to do.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
It was a curiosity. It was definitely, I just want to know what this is about.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I was lured into it. L. Ron Hubbard. No. So I had shared this with some gay friends of mine and they said, oh, we want to. You know, we want to introduce you to our friend Lori. You know, she's gay, and she plays golf like me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
It's de rigueur for the lesbian. So maybe you want to play golf with her sometime. So we got together to play golf, and I found myself attracted to her. And we went to have lunch afterwards, and we talk about this a lot.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And we went to lunch afterwards, and then we were talking about me being single, and I thought this would kind of lead down this. And she was like, oh, I work with, she worked in real estate. I work with so many great guys that you would love. And I was like, oh, boy, this is just taking a bad road the other way. And so I got back to my gay friends after. I said, I really like her.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
She's great, and she's very attractive. But he and my friends talked to her and said, you know, Carol's kind of interested in you. And she was very clear. She went, I'm not going to be some experiment for some straight woman.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I'd like to try being that funny. Robert Klein was a giant comic then. He played my college. It was like... But more than that, for me, it was like Elaine Boosler was on the cover of New York Magazine. And she was only a little bit older than me and doing a new style of comedy that wasn't Joan Rivers, that wasn't Phyllis Diller talking about Fang.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
She was. She was like, I'm not leading her into the cult. No, she's got to be down with it.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Exactly. So then she called me. about a month later. And she was like, do you want to hit some more golf balls? And we did that. And I remember I was working at Larry Sanders at the time. And she called me. She said, I have an event tonight. It was like the Beverly Hills Policeman's Ball. And her company was going. She said, you want to go with me? And so we went. And then it was very bizarre.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
There were like silent auction things. And then it was like, oh, a trip to Hawaii. Oh, that'd be fun. And I was feeling like, oh, there's something, yeah, happening here. And then afterwards, we just went back to my apartment. And we made out for like four hours.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. I mean, I had to do a little coaxing because she was reluctant with the straight woman thing. But I said to her.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I had to burn the card right in front of her just to prove. I said to her, and I remember this, and it's a very good line for somebody who's single. I said, what would it hurt if we just made out?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes. Yes. And I kind of had an aha moment kissing her of like, oh, oh, this is really good. This is really different. But it's really good. Better?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I think just closer. It was kind of some thing as close as I got with a man, it was different with her emotionally. It was just even deeper.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes, absolutely. I mean, whoever it is, you have to know, are you going to be... Is this all in or not? Yeah. Because I was always... At that stage of life, this has got to be all in. And she was like the same way. Yeah.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
That's such a great question. No, it just kind of evolved, you know?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
It just kind of happened naturally. I was really taken with men before. Yeah.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I mean, I had had one brief experience with a woman before, with another guy. Hello. But that wasn't an aha moment. It was fun, but it wasn't like, oh, my God, I'm a lesbian. Yeah.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Right. So talking about all in. You know, about 20 years into our relationship, Lori, my wife now, was like, I was always like, I didn't want to have kids. I used to call them, affectionately, fun killers.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And I just didn't think I would be a great parent. But Lori really wanted to have a kid. She's seven years younger than me. So I couldn't say no. This is something really important to her. So we decided to have a kid. I mean, I'm 50 at this point. But it was important to her, so I want all in. And we decided to adopt because of obvious reasons. So we adopted our son from Guatemala.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes. And it's been an interesting ride, you know, not ever seeing myself as a mother and being a co-mother.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, so much comes from how you were raised and your parenting handbook from you. And we come from very different backgrounds, Laurie and I. Like, I always call it the raised by wolves way with my parents. You know, great for independence, very bad for the feeling loved and tended to part.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes, also, but to a degree. I mean, I remember I went on a ski trip in ninth grade for three days, and a friend of mine called the house and said, hello, is Carol there? And my mother said, hold on.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Carol, where are you? Carol. So coming from that to Lori, who had very super involved parents...
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. You know, like in my house growing up, I don't know about you, but when you close the door to your room, that was like a good thing. Viewed as a good thing. It's like you're exploring something. You're practicing your flute. You're doing whatever. In her house, like closing the door meant someone was angry or someone was, you know, mad at somebody else.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And it also wasn't like, am I right, ladies? You know, like appealing just to that. It was pure comedy.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes, a certain amount. But, you know, as I've found from parenting also, School is very different now, raising a kid. You know, when I was growing up, I think my parents came to school twice.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, once to see me in a show, and I don't know, one time I was sick, and they were not involved. And I loved that. It was like, school is my place.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You're in the house and work, whatever, but this is my... Now everything is involving the parents.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Yeah. And emails from school. I'm always like, why are you emailing me? He's there.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
But you need to be involved that way with your kid these days. And I also think, you know, as people in comedy, we're also very attached to our work and it's so much of our identity. And I think that can take away from spending time, quality time, also with your kid.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I think we did pretty good. I feel very good that he's, whenever he came back from camp or whatever, people are always like, he's very funny. And then I always feel like.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And we have little jokes in the family. That's also like I did with my family. That's great. You know, inside jokes. So that always makes me feel very good.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Right. About dating and being a single woman in New York City, all that. So it was like, I also felt if she could do it, I can do it.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes. And what's gone from parenting now is, like when I went to school, I did well, partly because I wanted to, but partly because I knew my parents would kill me if I didn't do well in school.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I think I have. But as, you know, I've come to learn you can only do so much in the environment that is happening.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, Lori was downloading, I don't know how to put this, you know, it became like a project of... For you guys. Yeah, for her mostly. And it was like enormous. And I'm like, is this really?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
See, but you can't, what I've learned is you can't really do that because I feel like in some ways he's felt like I haven't been fully present that way. And I think that's been hurtful.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And you had to get there early in the afternoon to get a number to go on.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And I went on fifth, and I, Neil, I killed. It was like- It was like amazing with my little material that I had thought of.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, yeah. Well, you know, also being two moms, it makes it different because you view moms differently than that. But, you know, she's very, it's simple to say like, oh, she stays home. You know, she's on these plans. boards of the school.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Well, we're turning that corner now as he's getting ready to hopefully go to college and start that. So it's kind of a different...
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
We didn't discuss it a whole lot. I mean, she's always known that working, being in comedy is really important to me and that that wasn't going to stop. And to keep working as long as I have in the business takes a lot of fortitude. And I think she has been aware of that, too.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I had a minute more. Yeah. And then I thought, oh, this is great. You know, I'll be on The Tonight Show in two months. And, you know, I just, your first time out, I thought that's how it, what it's always like. It wasn't until I went back for the second time that I went on, and I didn't realize there were so many factors that go into stand-up.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Because I've been writing for 40 years. Yeah. And I just felt like, come on, you know? Yeah. I want that validation. It's just really important to me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Wow. And I was so sure we weren't gonna win because the bear was still looming. Yeah. That I took a job writing on the Emmys because I thought, well, I don't want to sit in the audience in here, you know, and lose. That's the worst thing. So I was like, I want to work during it because we're probably not going to win.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And then they announced Hacks and I went out there and I'm like, I'm wearing my sneakers.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Because writing has also changed in that, you know, Hacks is all... the writer's room is all on Zoom, which is great for the convenience of not having to drive and ba-ba-ba, but I miss, there's nothing like being in a room with funny people.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, that's hard. But I loved, I remember one time we were talking about stand-up that Debra Vance is really doing so well as a comic. And I said, she says to her manager, no papering the house anywhere. And they're like, papering the house? What is that? And I was like, that's a thing from the past. Yeah.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
What time you go on, if the check is being placed down, is the audience a little drunk?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And even to this day, I like the break of writing in terms of I have this great job. It's very creative. But I don't have to be out there like – You don't have to travel. Yeah. You don't have to travel. And I don't – it takes off the campaigning for yourself all the time, which has its good and its bad. You're not out there campaigning, which is nice and restful.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. At this point, I just feel like this is good. But I'm sure you're like me about stand-up. It's like, especially now going out, I'm doing like... You know, all new, like 12 minutes, I have 12 minutes that's completely new.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And I totally ate it so bad that a friend of mine from college was in the audience, and I was taping my set with a cassette tape recorder, and you can actually hear my friend in the audience going, Oh. It was that bad. Dying. So then it was like, oh, this is something that you have to learn and do a lot so I could figure out why I killed the first time and ate it the second time.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And it's kind of re-energized me to stand up because it's like, you know, when you start to do your act, the greatest hits becomes like doing Oklahoma every night, you know? So it's great that you kind of still, oh, I'm still funny.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
He left in 80 and he came back in 85 after Dick Ebersole was running the show.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I mean, I auditioned to be a performer, but an Al Franken came to my stand-up audition with a guy named Jim Downey, who was the head writer for a long time. And they said, oh, you really love your stand-up. And then they offered me a writing job. And I jumped at it, because it's amazing. But I liked it right away. Yeah, I was happy about it.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And there's a great documentary on Peacock now, a docuseries about SNL. But the fourth episode is called The Weird Year. And it's all about the year I was there. And they talk to me and a lot of other writers. And it's very interesting.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Something is very off. And the reviews came out right away. And Lauren called it. It was like, oh, how many Saturday night dead is there going to be? And there were. And it was horribly, you know, it was massacred by the critics. So it was bad. But I love that I got to write. I wrote a lot that year with Al Franken. And, you know, writing with someone else I think is so much fun.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, incredibly. And it was like a murderer's row of writers then. It was, you know, John Swartzwelder from... Yeah, Simpsons. Yeah, and Smigel.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Much... Their temper was much more mellow than comics. And also, you know, you've been hanging out with comics. It is a lot of me, me, me, me, me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
smarter the Harvard contingent and everything so it I felt like a little bit also like I was in a good college yeah did you feel out of your depth or was it like oh no I know like I have a different I have an elevated vocabulary that I can tap into that I'm not I I felt very accepted much like the stand-up community because I was the only woman by the end of the season I mean
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
There was another woman earlier in the season, but she got let go.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I do, in that I still really wanted to be a stand-up and make it as a stand-up. So I was, I feel like one foot in, one foot out. So I don't feel like I gave it 100%. Stand-up.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
So sometimes I think about, like, I wonder if I went back now, you know, I don't know if I could handle it because the schedule is so grueling. And for, I was there when I was 29. You can do it when you're 29. I don't know if you can do it at my age. But part of me feels like I didn't. do the complete experience from my end.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And I would love to have been there a lot, but my stand-up really grew after that, and I kind of had my... Your career or your talent?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I think so because, you know, when you're not doing exactly what you want to do, you really give to what you want to do so much because that's like your oasis.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Not a lot because I feel like things lay out the way they're supposed to. And also I feel like, you know, I still go after things that I want. You know, I feel like a misconception of show business is like, oh, you know, you write for Seinfeld and then you, you know, you coast.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Like even the Modern Family. Yeah. episode. I ran into Steve Levitan at an event, and I love the show, and I said to him, my patented way to ask people for things, you know, I said, I love the show, would you consider me coming in and pitching some ideas? You know, would you consider, it's so much better than, can I come in? Absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And also, if you add like, and if you can't swing it, no problem. And then all the pressure's off.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
This is part of the story because Catch Rising Star was like at that time, that's where the big names were. Yep. So Paul and I went over to the comic strip.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And then he said, yeah, sure, come in and pitch some stuff. And then I did and it became an episode. And so that's what I mean about, I kind of see my career as still evolving because I'll make something happen if it doesn't come to me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, I think it has to be really important to you. Look, I'm not saying if I were this age and I wasn't in a relationship, that would gut me. That would really make me feel terrible about where I'm at in my life.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I just think that as you get older, like, who am I going to ride this out with?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And also, when you've been with someone, like I have been with my wife, Lori, we shared so many things that they really... They're your family. You know, you're in a relationship, but they're your family. Like, we were together when Princess Di was killed. Like, stuff like that. Like, landmarks of your life. And also, she's been with me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, when we have a bad Uber driver, we think of that French guy.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Every tunnel, we go back. But that would make me very sad. I have friends my age that never are in a relationship, and I don't know. I feel sorry for them.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And I always feel so funny saying this. You know, they were looking for comedians. So, you know, one answer.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I think they would say they don't, but I think a part of them does.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
because it is so much compromise, which I think is tough for people like us.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You just do it. You just have to, you compromise because the give and take, you know, you know that. And I think also comedians, you know, we're needy. We can be a real pain in the ass. You know, I feel like your partner shoulders a lot of that. So I'm very mindful of that as well.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Just things bending around me and what I need and want. You know, she's very good at navigating that. But I'm aware of it. So I try to give her a lot back because we can be a handful. I can be a handful. Yeah. As comics, it's built into, I think, the DNA.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. At some point, we are going to be able to talk about my new book, right?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
For a wedding, bar mitzvah, graduation, and every other event you didn't want to go to in the first place.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
We were talking one time, and it was during the strike, about he had been to a wedding and saw someone give a horrible speech.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And I was like, oh, my God, I've seen that a million times, too. And we started talking about it, and then we were like, why don't we write a book together about – writing a speech, writing a funny speech. You know, as comedians, we kind of do that every night anyway. But I do have a nice little sidebar of my career where I do a lot of corporate speaking.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
So I've also learned what works in those situations, what doesn't.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I just kind of talk about being in my career for almost 50 years, and what kind of the process, the journey of that. Of course, I speak a lot to my Jewish groups.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, I talk a lot about Judaism and what it's meant to me, what it means to me. So that.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Like, what are you doing, what am I doing that has made me in the business thriving for that long a time? Like, you know, a lot of people shoot up high and then nothing.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
because I know so many, I don't know if you have the same experience, I know a lot of talented people who didn't go the long run because they faced a lot of obstacles and couldn't take it anymore. I just said to one of my friends the other day who's a manager, making it in show business for the long run is taking a lot of shit.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And you knew everybody, yeah. So we went on there, and I remember my audition night over there, because Paul and I went on, and Rich Hall.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And you can either, you know, shoulder that and carry on and muscle through or you get like, I can't take this shit anymore.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And they just disappear. You know, like either I have enough money or whatever, I'll find something else to do because the rejection and rejection. the no's become so overwhelming that they can't keep up the fight. And you know it's still a fight. It's always a fight.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
It's incredible. I spent time with him, too. I used to work on that show, Better Late Than Never, with the older guys. And we went to Thailand. I texted him. You want to get together? Sure. Yeah. But I quote his story to so many writers because he, I guess it's probably now at least 10 years ago,
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. He took his Writers Guild pension, and it was like, you know what? I'm moving to Thailand. Yep. And then he meets this great woman. He marries her.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Isn't she amazing? Yeah. And she had a son, and he's the dad now.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes. Jerry, you know, and I always talk about this, he was like already a star at the comic strip. Which doesn't surprise people now, but way back then, you know, that he put you through, that he was kind of like the top guy at the comic strip, only doing it for a year.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I know, Neil. But you know what? I do worry about that because, like, being creative is my jam. And that people are still responding to it, that makes the jam even better. But it's going to stop at some point. And, you know, even now, you know, there are not that many people my age, women my age, who are still doing it.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, I have women who come over to me who are on the cusp of 50 who are like, I'm starting to feel it.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, ageist. Yeah. It's not happening. You know, and almost 20 years past that. But. I do worry about you can't do it forever.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
To be, not only to do it, but be recognized. And when it goes away, like, what will I do?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, exactly. Because during the strike, I really had a hard time.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Like, what am I? At least Rick and I got to write the book, but not working is very bad for me. It just makes me feel empty.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. No, I wish the Judaism could help me. More with that, it's just kind of a... It helps so much with showbiz, I'm kidding. It sure does. But that's, I don't know, that's disappearing.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Yeah, no, you know, and I had an experience a year ago, my best friend, I had two best friends since fifth grade, and one of my best friends got cancer and died. And it's been, you know, besides just being devastating, it's really rocked my head and my world, you know, thinking about
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
and could happen to her, could happen to anybody, one of us, you know, I mean, with the plane crash, we just, you know, yeah, it does make you think a lot about that. And it's not, it's not good.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, I guess if you can be okay with it, but I'm not. I mean, that you're going to die one day, it sucks.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, I know. Well, that's what's hard about it. It just makes you want to do the things that, You haven't done.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
That's funny. The thing about myself, nothing seems weird to me or undoable. I really want to write a song with somebody. I have a really good idea for a song. I know a lot of people through my... I'll find somebody who's going to say, okay, come by the studio one day. And I don't know, just like whatever... You know, nothing seems impossible to me, which I think is maybe a little Pollyanna.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I know, isn't it? But I keep thinking about it and I keep writing on my phone. Like, you know, it wouldn't be like, it's just the lyrics. I think I have some very good lyrics to a song and it's not a far reach to someone who writes music. You know, I write for a living.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Right. No, it would be to get it to an artist and they do it and it's great.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I think so. Yeah, because kind of what started the beginning of our conversation, I always wanted a life in comedy. I just, you know, my father was funny. He dreamed about being a comedian or a comedy writer. He was the king of joke tellers. I saw how he connected with people through humor. And I got early feedback, you know, that I was funny and I just was, I want a life in comedy.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And I've been living that since, you know, my senior year of college. And that's so fulfilling to me. And to be with, you know, we never spent any time together. You know, it's great to spend time with you. And it's so interesting to talk to you. I love funny people.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And my life would be so devoid if I didn't have funny people in my life.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Because that's the best. So I don't feel I have regrets that way.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Yeah. I think so. I mean, I like to think I'm a good person.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, occasionally I ask someone to make out with me, but...
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
He was very good being in charge, like I'm running auditioning. But he didn't have an ego about it. Or like the other places, he didn't lord it over you. You know, like, yeah, you're lucky to be here. And if I pass you.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I mean, I think it's also a big reason why we adopted our son from Guatemala because I also want to feel like Doing a really good deed is going to I'm going to feel my soul will really ride on that. Did that work? Yes, absolutely. Absolutely. And we try to convey to, you know, he's a teenager in Brentwood, but.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You do know that, you know, people from Guatemala are, you know, death defying, you know, avoiding alligators to get into this country. And we swept you up from a third world country. And here you are.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes, everything. Templates, things not to do, jokes people can use if they want to.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
For whatever occasion. Yeah. I mean, the thing is, when people come up to you and say, will you give a speech at something, aren't you excited? Aren't you looking forward to it?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
But your average person is dreading it and is like, what do I do?
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And then some people, what inspired us to write the book, go up there and they stink up the joint so badly it ruins the event.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
That's amazing. He just was very regular, but he had a good command of the place. And I think also of his material at the time. He was very diligent about writing. I always talk about how we fucked around so much in the early days of stand-up. He would set aside an hour every day where he would be in his apartment writing material, no matter what everybody was doing.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes. Adopting. Writing a book about speeches. You know, I'm the real deal.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Oh, my God. I got into show business really early. I was going to school at SUNY Binghamton, now called just Harper College. And I was in a theater group with my then boyfriend, Paul Reiser. And he was the funniest guy I've ever met.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
that lay people are always like i just heard sarah silverman was asked this like oh no no is amy schumer you know isn't there a competition you know among funny people and you know who has the better joke and you think if you go to dinner i don't think people understand comics love other comics we love each other do you have a good premise about something
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Well, at the beginning, and I don't know if this was your experience, I think it takes, like I remember at the improv having a very bad set in the first year or two and being at the bar and really thinking, I don't know if I want to do this and this is hard and when it goes bad, it's heartbreaking. And Stephen Wright came over to me and he said, you know, you have to do it every night.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
for like three years and not judge yourself at all, just do it every night and you'll be home free. You'll see, it'll work.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah, every night. And then, you know, in New York, do Catch a Rising Star, do the comic strip. Then I passed the improv audition. And then the cellar opened later. So, you know, on a Saturday night, you could do six sets. And that's how you become bulletproof.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
No, theater didn't really have anything to do with it, I don't think. But I think that's a common thread among comedians. I had a friend who said, you know, most people's biggest fear is talking in front of large groups of people. And most comedians fear is not talking in front of large groups of people. You know, we have something in us that's like, hey, look at me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
That's a good question. When you're just a comic in New York, it was just doing sets. And then everybody started to move out to California. So I felt like, well, that's what all the kids are doing.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And I was like... Well, hopefully I'll get into The Tonight Show. That was the holy grail. You know, I don't think the kids understand that, like, of my generation, that was it.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
And like Freddie Prinze, you do The Tonight Show, you kill, and the next day you're a star.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Which was my first, you know, TV thing. And David Letterman saw the tape of it. And he recommended me to the Tonight Show. A guy named Jim McCauley was the talent guy. You know, the grand poobah.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes. Important in the story. I figured. He passed on me. But then Letterman got his show, his late night show. And I got on. in 82. I'm pretty pale, you know. I go down to the beach, people think I'm a mime.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
I was on three times in this first year. And they gave me an open door. But then I kind of became a Letterman act. So it was tough to get on The Tonight Show. But I eventually did. Because I auditioned 22 times to get on The Tonight Show.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Okay, so right at the end. Yeah, right before he came off the air. And he waved me over, you know, which was a big deal on panel. And I sat down with him. And my memory of him is, you know, he was big with the pencils.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
During the commercial break, he was tapping along to the band, but it was like in person. It was a little maniacal. It was like, Johnny, calm down. You know, it was really. And he turned to me and he said, you know, I did this joke back then. I don't have any kids, none that I know about. And he turned to me and he said, that is a good switch, good switch on that joke there.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
You know, I'm just so happy that I have a life in comedy. I mean, it's everything to me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Like, it's in my DNA. And I'm sure you found this with stand-up. I got really good feedback right away. So that was so good for me because it was like, oh, I think I picked the right thing. So...
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Right. And as a woman, people always assumed like, oh, you know, how did you survive? Like the Boys Club has always been really nice to me.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
Yes. Well, we were in a theater group, and he was funny. But we connected because he could lip sync the 2,000-Year-Old Man album, the Mel Brooks Carl Reiner album, like I could. And it was like, this is Kismet meeting this funny guy.
Blocks w/ Neal Brennan
Carol Leifer
So I always got that kind of push from... from guys around of like, I got a great piece of advice coming up in stand-up that I'll never forget. That was amazing. I used to get heckled. The bad thing about being young and female in standup is I got hassled a lot. And also because I wasn't bulletproof or more bulletproof yet.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
But not really until you go on TV. I mean, to this day, my first appearance on Letterman is like one of my, the best days of my life.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Because like suddenly you're not just, you know, kind of in it. You're really in it.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
It was so different that my dad bought a VCR to tape me. At the time, it was like $1,000. Wow.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
The Freddie Prince story. He did, I think like one appearance and then he got like Chico and the man the next day, got his own series.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Well, I got my break to write on SNL. This is... What year?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
What is affectionately or disaffectionately called the weird year. Yeah, yeah. You know, with the strange cast, Robert Downey Jr., Randy Quaid, but Al Franken... Anthony Michael Hall.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Al Franken and Jim Downey came to the comic strip to audition comics. And they saw me and they said, would you like to, you know, we'd like you and we'd like to see if you want to write on the show. I was like, absolutely. They said, oh, you just have to meet Lauren. So I was like, all set for this meeting. And Had all my answers prepared, you know, for like a serious sit-down business meeting.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
It was literally, he was auditioning people, Lauren, at this rehearsal space. He came out for two seconds and he said to me, oh, I don't do a good Lauren. You know, Jim and I'll say you're very good. And, you know, sometimes you have to stay up late at the show. I was like, yeah. He went, okay, thanks. That was my big interview.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
I guess so, yeah. Like, if I had said, I really don't like staying up.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah, that's going to interfere with my routine. And so I wrote that year, and I really enjoyed it, but I really wanted to go back to stand-up. So I did. But then, strangely, out of the blue, in 93... Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld called me together.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
So I knew at that time there was something odd about that because I would talk to each of them separately on a landline, but calling me together seemed weird. They were in one spot.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah, and they were like, you know, do you want a ride for Seinfeld? And I was like, uh, yeah. You know, it was great because my inexperience is the thing that got me the job because they, you know, didn't want people who'd written on sitcoms before because as Larry referred to it, you know, they were poisoned by the system. What was your first writing job?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
I remember that. Do you remember People Express? No, just that name. People Express. The airline of China.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
It was crazy because, you know, a lot of times people come up to you when you write on a hit show like that and they're like, something really funny happened to me. And you're like, oh, boy, here we go. You know, and it's like Betty's egg salad was in the fridge at work and somebody took it, you know, and it's like, oh, boy, here we go.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
But a friend of mine from high school was like, I had the funniest thing happen. This couple came over and brought a bread. We didn't put it out and they wanted to take it back. And I knew when I went in to Larry's office, Larry and Jerry, you would pitch to them one on one. If Larry liked an idea, he would get so ecstatic. You know what I mean? When I pitched that, he was like, I love it.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
I love it. We're doing that. Yeah. We're doing that. And he would be like that about certain ideas, you know, like Elaine thinks the Korean manicurist are talking about her behind her back in Korean.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Exactly. You know, conversely, if you pitched, and this is a lot of times, ideas that he, they didn't like, he would kind of do this thing with his arm and go... Yeah, I don't know.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
He was having a heart attack. Yeah. You know, or he would, you know, the biggest put down was, I could see that on another show. Yeah. And it would be like, oh. But, and then when you have an idea like you like like that, in thinking about it, I was also thinking about Kramer and loving Costco because I loved Costco. Still do. Yeah.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yes, yes. And that he bought so much beefaroni that he started feeding it to his handsome cab horse, which eventually gave him a lot of flatulence.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah. The guest casting was amazing. And what was great about then, them as bosses for the writers, was you could be involved in every step of the process. You know, you're involved in casting. And, you know, now that I work on shows, people send in tapes, which is horrible. You know, it was so great when people would walk in the room and they go, hey, where's the hot seat?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
You know, and they'd sit down and you get a vibe off of them and everything. You could also see how nervous they were in front of people instead of self-taping at home. But you'd be part of the casting. You'd be part of everything. So editing and all that. And a lot of times writers don't have that opportunity on shows. So that was really great.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
And to cast these smaller roles and people that just took off, you know. And even like the regulars, like the tennis episode I did with Morley Matlin, the lib reader.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
It's like, what are the four stories going to be? And for Kramer, for that, you have a tennis episode. Well, he's got to be a ball boy. And then you know that's going to be funny. We called him the ball man. And then he was rehearsing. Michael would rehearse these physical things over and over. People just thought he just did it automatically. He would really rehearse it.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Exactly. Because also, you know, your ass is on the line if something goes off. So you do have that sense of responsibility with an episode, which is great. You know, the saddest thing to me is that I'm a big collector. So I took the, we couldn't use Beefaroni for some reason.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yes. Yeah. They made us change the name. So I had the can that the prop guy came up with for Beefarino. And I had it in my apartment on Flores in West Hollywood. And then when I moved, I forgot to take it, you know, move it away. And the guys thought it was just an empty can and they tossed it. I know.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Crazy, crazy story. All right. So in 1989, I'm getting some gigs. Things are good. I run into this agent who's supposed to be, you know, big time at the time. He's like, you know, Carol, I think you could be doing even better. Why don't you come to my office, write down the gigs you have had and how much you got, and we'll go over it. All right. So I wrote them down. I came to his office.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
And right away, looking at the list, he was like, you got this at Sir Laugh-A-Lots? Oh, that's a joke. You know, you made this much at the Chuckle Hut? No, that's pathetic. Great names, though. So he said, why don't you, you know, sign with me? I was like, OK, great.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
So we start working together and if things are, you know, time is passing by, I'm literally working at ground round restaurants doing comedy nights there.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Where you can't even be heard because people are, the sound of peanut shells crunching on the floor. Yeah. You could not even get over it. So I would call him and go, what's going on? Where are these big gigs? He was like, I'm working on Frank. Yeah. And at this point, I'm like, opening for, like, Frank Stallone? Who are you talking about?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Hi, my name is Carol Leifer. And I feel fresh about being Conan O'Brien's friend. Fresh? It's new, it's fresh.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
So then I work on a cruise ship and I get a phone call. Now, you know, if you got a phone call on a cruise ship in 1989, somebody died or your place is on fire. And it was the agent. And he said, you're going to open for Frank Sinatra at Bally's in Las Vegas for shows. And he apparently knew Jilly Rizzo.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And so I got the gig. And I called my friend Larry Miller because he had opened for Frank. I worked with Larry years ago.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
To get some tips because I was a little nervous. And he said, oh, they're going to love you. You know, it's a great gig. His audience is great. And it was an amazing... It's still today the top of my career showbiz experience.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
I do my set, but I learned something very important as a comedian with that gig because I was a little nervous about going out there. I went out and I said, oh, I'm so happy that Mr. Sinatra asked me to join him here at Ballet's. And then the audience was like, oh, okay, she's Frank's girl. All right, yeah, yeah. So that helped my set a lot. Yes. So I do my time, 15 minutes.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
You know, they had the clocks in Vegas on the stage floor. You got to keep it at 15. And then Sinatra would come out and he'd bring me back for a bow.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
But he said some cryptic things sometimes. Like one time he said, that was Carol Leifer. I wish my mother had been that funny. I wouldn't have had to work so hard. The summer breeze came rushing in from across the city. Yeah. And then another time he brought me out. He says, that was Carol Leifer. She's big. She'll knock you over for the phone.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yes, but what a gentleman. I mean, I have friends from that time who opened for people in Vegas who would not even bring them back out, you know. I would tell you the names of the acts, but I really shouldn't. But some of them are very supreme. Oh.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yes. Right. Exactly. Yeah. No, it's when I saw the show for the first time. So Gene is the first actor I've seen who is convincing as a stand up.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
I mean, completely, because there are so many actors who've tried it, and you can just sense something is off. But she goes out there when she does her stand-up on the show, and you totally buy that she's Deborah Vance, the comedian. Yeah.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
he is the same person the same yeah he actually just built a show around who he is exactly and he's always he's always larry david like i asked him when i got married if he would do a speech and of course he was like yeah you know i ruined my golf game that day yeah no i can't do it yeah you know it's so larry david
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
But he does have a great laugh, doesn't he? Great laugh. Yeah. When you make him laugh, there is no better feeling in the world.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
I want to bring up... That's also... Oh, sorry. Oh, go ahead. His genius, that he would take things... Like, he and Larry from Seinfeld, they always loved real-life ideas. And Larry loved it on Curb. So when I pitched to him... This true story that I had this great fold up umbrella that I loved, like it just opened perfectly and closed. And I just and then I lost it. And I thought I lost it.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
It was from the Omni Dallas Hotel. And I thought I left it at a Japanese restaurant. So, of course, I went back and the owner was like, you know, I was like, have you seen him? You know, a black fold up umbrella is like, yeah, I have 3000 of them back here. Yeah, but mine says Omni Dallas. And it was like, no, we don't have that. But the genius of Larry David is.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
He creates that he's in a fight with the owner of the Japanese restaurant so that not only can he not get the umbrella back, but then it becomes also about, well, it's really the Omni Dallas's umbrella. So why should I give it back to you? So he takes it like six steps forward, which is brilliant.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Exactly. And he really latches on to small things. Like the first time I went to pitch for Curb, I went in and my first idea was, when you're a funny person, a comedian, and a regular person, you tell something funny, say something funny, and someone goes ba-dum-bum to it, how much you hate that. It's so insulting. And Larry Amita was like, yes, yes, I like that. So we used that.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Carol Burnett. Well, you know, I've written for Carol. I wrote for her 50th anniversary show, her 90th birthday special. And so I've got to know her casually. Yeah. And she's amazing.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Oh, my God. Isn't she? Yeah. I reached out to her, and I said, you know, I have this book, and if you'd be kind enough to write the foreword. And, of course, approaching somebody like that. I'm always with, but if you can't do it, I totally understand. No problem. No harm, no foul. And she was like, yeah, send me the book. So this is on a Friday, okay? Sunday, she calls me.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
She goes, I read the book. I loved it. I'm happy to write the foreword. I mean, who does that?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
But what you said, you know how many people get up and tell a speech, do a speech, and they don't say who they are. They just start talking about the person. And you're sitting there three minutes in going, is this his aunt? Is this a teacher? Who is this to this person? I mean... It's just important to get up there and go, hi, I'm Ann Betty, and I've known so-and-so since they were born.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
It is weird. You know, part of the advice we give in the book, you can't you don't have to memorize it. You know, just if you have a card, have some bullet points. Yes. But also, you know, practice it in front of someone who's going to be at the event that knows the person. That's a good idea, too. But reading is. Yeah, that's a big turnoff.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah, absolutely. We have a lot of jokes in there, jokes to steal for the events. But the beginning, middle, and end, it's really not all that difficult.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And look at it. It's handy, right? Small. It's not a giant tome.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
And you know what I wanted to say because I would be remiss if I didn't. I mean, to host the Oscars is really a tough gig. It's really, really tough. But I will tell your audience that beforehand when I went to wish you luck, you said, you know what? I just want to have fun out there.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Absolutely. Yeah. So you really weren't all that nervous going out.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
You know what? It was actually quite the opposite because there were not many women. And I always thought that was a tremendous advantage because... I always talk about the 70s stand-up. They were looking for comedians. But it's really true. So when I started, there were like four or five women comics. You know, Rita Rudner was of my generation. And they wanted women comics.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
And I always felt I got so much support from the guy comics. Oh, good. Yeah, a lot of people thought it was a little rough and tumble and all that, but I got so much support, so I found it to be advantage. I mean, what was obnoxious was way back then, they wouldn't put on two women following each other. It was like it had to be separated.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Like, we'll have the singer, then the ventriloquist, then a woman, then the monkey act, then maybe another woman.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Well, I think, you know, as always wanting to be a performer, you know, like most people's greatest fear is speaking in front of large groups of people. Most performers fear is not speaking in front of people.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
I did. I did. And what I liked about stand-up was anybody can do it. You know, I was going to school at Binghamton. Paul Reiser was in my theater group. And he told me... Like one day, you know, during the summers, I go to these comedy clubs on audition night and I perform. And comedy clubs were so new then, you know. So when he was talking about clubs, I was like, this guy goes to clubs?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Performing at these places. He was like, anybody can go on. So I always loved that about it. And I still love that about stand-up. It's like, you want to go on. It's not like an actor where you have to...
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Exactly. And the first time I went on, on my first audition, you know, it's also something about being young and having a lot of balls that you don't have later on in life.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
So I went on audition night. My first audition night, I like killed. It was amazing. And I thought like, oh my God, this is not only so great, it's so easy. Like I'll be on Johnny Carson next week. It's amazing. It wasn't until the second time that I went on that I completely bombed. Like, so bad that I invited friends from college to come see me because I was like, oh, you know, I'm doing great.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
And I had a tape recorder on the table, and you can actually hear my friend in the middle of my set going, oh.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Muttering how horrible it was going over. So then I saw, like, to be a stand-up comedian, it takes some work. You have good nights. You have bad nights. There are a lot of factors that go into it, who you follow, what time of the night you go on, how inebriated the crowd is. So you have to learn to negotiate all that.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
No, no. In 1980, kids, I was in a contest called the big, the New York laugh off contest. And it was a contest, you know, of comedians. You know, that's so funny to me today. It's like, back then, that's how you got exposure. You were in contests, you know?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
And it aired on Showtime, and Letterman saw that and recommended me to The Tonight Show for that.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
And then The Tonight Show saw my big laugh-off set, and they passed.
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
So then when Dave got his show, they just reached out and said, would you like to be on?
Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend
Carol Leifer
Yeah, I was on 25 times. And they gave me an open door. It was like, whenever you have a new set, come on, which was amazing.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah, that was third year. Yeah. So was your audition in one of those chorus line rehearsal rooms like I saw them?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
When did you audition, Spade? When was yours?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Oh, wow. But you thought that night you hadn't done well, right?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
You mean the set that I did for The Tonight Show?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Well, you know, the weird year, it was like, I don't know that I want to be a part of it.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
But, you know, I feel like that year I had one foot in and one foot out because I really wanted to concentrate on my standup. So, uh, yeah, I, I don't think I, I just, on the weekend, you know, weeks off I'd be doing sets and all that. So, um, Yeah, no. Certainly, maybe if I had been on a more successful year, I would have dreamt about it.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Well, it's a bit of a saga because, you know, Letterman saw me on the big New York laugh-off.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Exactly. So I always felt like if I had to take for my act, dig away. Because if it keeps you alive at the show.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And I just, sorry, I'm show dropping the Oscars a couple of times.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
John Lithgow was presenting this year, and I saw him, the writers hanging out in the green room, and I saw him and I said, you guest hosted the year that I wrote on SNL. And he was like, oh, you know, he like, well, he was very sweet. He was like, oh, you must have been a young child when you worked there. I said, yes, of course, child labor.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
But no, I told him that, you know, he was such a great host. He learned every writer's name that week. And he was incredible. And he remembered the sketch that we had written for him.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Yeah, because, you know, in our day, that's how you got people to pay attention to you. You did podcasts. And he saw the Big Laugh Off. You know, that's the one where Eddie Murphy came in fifth and I came in fourth. Yes. So he had seen me on the Big Laugh Off and he recommended me to Jim McCauley, as you know, the talent booker for The Tonight Show. And then they passed.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Yeah. So he was he was amazing and still is.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And then this is my 11th time. I was part.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
No, Conan has his own team of people. And then there's a show team that I'm part of. Okay. I don't know if you guys know this guy, John Max. He's a head writer of many, many great. He's the guy to go to for your award shows. And yeah. And then we.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
No, no Bruce Blanch. But yeah, it's a good group and it's fun. You guys know it's fun writing.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yes, I wrote for Billy a couple of times. Billy's great. I'm going to say on this podcast. They've all been great.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Well, Troy Miller used to direct.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And I loved Conan's substance parody. How funny was that?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
but even his, I loved his, um, his musical number was a lot like, uh, it reminded me of the great Billy stuff too, like that.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. It was, uh, Look, funny is funny, but I agree that- I'm saying I'm just surprised.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yes, I heard it. It was great. Yeah. Jerry. Jerry. Jerry, uh, he is a great guy. He made all my dreams come true a couple of weeks ago because I was in New York and, um, As you can see, I'm a big Beatles fan.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And not only did I go with him to see McCartney at the Bowery Ballroom, but afterwards there was a little after party and he introduced me to him. that's as good as it gets yeah and he said my name he said hello Carol and kissed me on the cheek whoa he kissed you on the cheek kissed me on the cheek yeah
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And then probably when I saw you, Dana, they saw me again and they passed. And I auditioned 22 times until I finally got the Tonight Show in 1992, right before Johnny left.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I was introduced... No, um... You know, I have an older sister who's five years older and a brother who's 11 years older. So I heard their music a lot as a kid and remember the Ed Sullivan show, them coming on, going crazy, you know, what a happening it was. It's hard to explain to people how revolutionary their haircuts were. I mean, it was like, what?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. My brother was home from University of Chicago. And the night of the Beatles concert, he said, because we lived on Long Island. Hey, hey, squirt. You want to go see the Beatles? And I was like, yeah. And drove to Shea. Whoa. Tickets that night. My sister, who had gotten tickets six months before, she was like four rows in front of us. And saw the Beatles at Shea Stadium.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I kind of am very wedded to their early stuff because it reminds me of the mania and of first seeing them and all that. So, like, I saw her standing there, you know, that early, early stuff. But I'm also a Wings fan, you know? Yeah, me too. And I just worked with Lawrence Juber, who was like his guitar player in Wings. So I run the gamut, you know, with McCartney.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. But he was talking about, you know, they didn't, people couldn't have their phones that night. At the Bowery Ball.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
But it was great because they were, and to watch the show, because we were up in this little, you know, I mean, maybe has like. 300 people in the whole place. But to watch a concert now with people not having their phones, it was such a joy because it's like, oh, right, people actually experience it and not wanting it for later.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
But what was happening also was... It is that, you know, I was doing Letterman a lot during those years. So Tonight Show also saw me as a Letterman act. So that did in my way, but it just became like, I don't know, should I wear a dress the next time? Okay. Oh yeah. Like it just became a bit of like, okay, I guess I'll go out there again.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
The VIPs, like Jerry and his plus one, were up on a balcony, you know, on the top. So we were standing. But you wanted to stand. Everybody was standing.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Well, we really go so far back as to when I auditioned at the comic strip along with Paul Reiser and Rich Hall. Paul Reiser? Wow. Yeah. Jerry was the emcee and he put us through the auditions. And then when I auditioned to catch Rising Star, Larry David was the emcee and he put me through that audition. So I go back to my first days at these clubs with them.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
But what happened with Larry and Jerry was weird because I remember they I got a call from both of them and it was like, why are my friends calling me together? You know, I mean, you know, in 93, that was probably like, you know, conference call like that, you know, be on the same phone. But it's like, why are they calling me? And they were like, hey, do you want to write on Seinfeld?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
It's like, yeah. But my advantage was and I think other writers advantage was they didn't want people who'd written for sitcoms before. because Larry hated all other sitcoms. They wanted people new to the task. So I was lucky that way. So that's how I got hired.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
You know, in a lot of ways, it was like SNL to me because you had to pitch your ideas to Larry and Jerry. You would go in and... It was set a time to go in and it was like two sentences kind of max, you know, like, um, like I went in, you know, Elaine thinks the Korean manicurist are talking about her behind her back. Um, at the nail salon, you know, and that kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
We're doing that. Yeah. Yeah. That's a great idea. Yeah. Yeah. And then you'd pitch other ones and he had this habit of like rolling a shield and going, no, no, no. I can see that on another show now, you know.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah, he would be like, if he liked something like that, or like Elaine thinks there are skinny mirrors at Barney's, you know, he would go, yeah, yeah, I love that. But, you know, come back with like a George, a Jerry and Kramer story, you know, that kind of thing. But it was the same thing. Like if you pitched ideas and it was a lot of, I don't know, you sort of started to get anxious about it.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
But when he liked something, he was so effusive about it, it lifted you to go off and do it.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I do think, and let's go back to the Beatles here.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
What made the show great was the two of their sensibilities together, right? I always call it kind of like Lennon and McCartney, you know, Jerry, the more kind of pop sensibility, you know, friendly Stan and Larry being more the Lennon, you know, the curmudgeon having the edge and that together it made it a lightning in a bottle.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And even working on Curb, I know Larry so well from Seinfeld that it was the same thing at Curb. You know, you'd go in and pitch ideas and he would love them or not like them.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
It was always Macaulay, yeah. I mean, you remember how powerful he is.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
But when he loves something, he was, he always, like, I remember the first time I pitched him Curb ideas, I said, you know, when you are with regular people, and by regular people, I mean not comedians, and you make a joke and one of them goes, ba-dum-bum.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
You know, the equivalent of saying the N word, you know, and he was like, he loved that, you know, so when he loves something and you're on a good roll, you can.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And isn't it amazing that she's Lorraine Newman's daughter?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And sometimes when she delivers lines, it's like I totally forgot her name.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And he loves all that small stuff. Like, he loved, I had a pitch about, you know, you pitch something to TV people, execs, and they go, you know, I don't love it. Yeah, I don't like it's like, no, I don't love it. And, you know, that's the kind of thing he sparks to like.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
He would totally, he would have totally made something about that. Totally.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Have you talked about the SNL 50th ad nauseum spade?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Oh, well, I wanted to know. I was only there for the concert, so I didn't see.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Even with my shitty seats, it was amazing.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I was like, hmm, maybe this would have a better view at home.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
You know, you have 12 years of experience, as you know. I mean, you get better every year. And at that time in New York, I mean, you guys didn't come up in the New York scene, but you could do eight sets on a Saturday night.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Well, the next night, the Saturday night, was the Writers Guild Awards.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I do have an Emmy, but it's in the other room, but I think it needs to be on camera.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah, yeah, no, it's... It's a good streak.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
You guys know as well as I do, to be in a room with other funny people is just... it's just the greatest. I mean, as much as I love standup and I saw you recently Spade at, um, there's, there's nothing better to me than being in a room with funny people. It's just the greatest thing.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
It's like, I always think it's like, you know, you go to a foreign country and say you're there for like a month, like Italy and you know, everybody's speaking Italian and nobody speaks English. And then like an American comes in and you're like, Oh my God, you know, and you just, to me, that's like with any comedian, there's always this kind of just instant bond. And yeah.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I really have a great affection for my first letterman. which was in 1982, just because, you know, your first time, like, oh, my God, I'm on TV and people are seeing this. And what I dreamed about, to me, that's like my most precious kind of memory.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
On March 20th at Comedy and Magic Club.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Also with the great Kathy Ladman. So three funny ladies all together. I see Wendy, she's great.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
You know, with all the different comedy clubs, I mean, you'd have, you know, a seven, 10 here and eight, you know, a 15 year, it just went on and on and on. So I just was a better comedian, but wait a minute. So dating, you never did the tonight show with Johnny.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I think they're calling it the ladies of laughter.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Right? Yeah. How much time did you have to do?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
stop the show and do a sound check so it's difficult you think they do a show every night you think i think they know what they're doing and then you go oh they don't can i tell you a great story about joel rivers but that kind of stuff yes we would love it all right so i had a corporate gig in new york when i was coming up and uh they had booked um
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Joan Rivers to just open the show and introduce me and leave. So I get there, you know, before her, obviously. And, you know, like you guys, you know, you don't travel with your agent or manager for these times. So I show up and I see that there's no spotlight there. So I say to the guy, the tech guy, yeah, I'm the comedian. I see you have a mic, but you don't have a spotlight.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And he looks at me like, oh, sorry, we don't have your spotlight share. You know, like I'm some diva. I was like, yeah, people need to see me. Yeah. You know, and he just like blew me off. It was so brilliant. So then Joe Rivers gets there, says hello to me. And she goes, where's the spotlight? And I go, I know. So, and the, you know, the tech guy was like hanging his head in shame.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
She literally went on stage and she was like, yeah, she did her bit, you know, cue you doing your Joan Rivers impression. But she goes, listen, I'm going to bring on the next act, but you be very nice to her, all of you, because there's no spotlight and it's very unprofessional. And it was, I mean, I mean, I love you, Joan Rivers. May you rest in peace.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
The comedy condo was the worst experience of my life ever. I did a gig. It was in Phoenix. It was a comedy condo. I was doing it with my friend Sue Kalinsky. We get there and we go to this disgusting comedy condo. And there's the other guy there. Disgusting. If you want to go, whatever. So about 7 o'clock, Sue and I get ready. We're getting ready to go to the gig.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And we yell up to the guy, well, we're an hour away from showtime. If you want to come down now, we're going. And the guy comes down. He's like, oh, I'm not a comic. I just live here.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Had just one of their friends living in one of the rooms. I mean, if you don't call 9-1-1 then, I really don't know what.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Before it gets too late, fellas, can I promote my new book?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. It's called How to Write a Funny Speech for a Wedding Bar Mitzvah Graduation and Every Other Event You Didn't Want to Go to in the First Place.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
How to write a funny speech for a wedding or a mitzvah, graduation, and every other event you didn't want to go to in the first place.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah, no one has. I wrote it with my comedy writer friend, Rick Mitchell. And no, no comedy writers have written a book like this. A lot of stiffs, you know, from the, you know... Corporate headquarters or whatever have written it, but no.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Right. We're tired of going to events where someone just stinks up the room with their horrible speech, and we felt like we could give them some help.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And most comedians' greatest fear is not speaking in front of them.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah, stay on Amazon. You can just click.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Oh, I wanted to ask you, Spade, because when I saw you, I loved your bit about Amber Alerts.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
It was definitely something. And I learned in many different languages. With all of the camp. But I think by 92, you know, I remember it was just, I had done the new year show with Leno before. And I just feel like they kind of felt like, Oh, we got to put her on. I mean, this is ridiculous already.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Elaine Boosler was actually not my female peer. She was before me. Yeah. And she, I got into standup because one of the big reasons was because of Elaine, you know, I'm sure people have talked about on your pod that not, not really enough. Not much.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
She was the, yeah, the top, the female standup that when I was in those early days, she was, she was on the cover of New York magazine and funny girl. And it just kind of changed everything. I was like, oh, if this woman can do it, maybe I can do it. I remember Seinfeld and I talking about that cover.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
It had an impact on him in wanting to go into stand-up because it was a new type of woman and person going into stand-up.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yes. Joan Rivers was great. But I think what differentiated her from my generation was, you know, it was a very like, am I right, ladies?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Rosie O'Donnell came a little after me, but you know, my peers were like Rita Rudner and Paul Stone. But I remember with Rita, because we went on a Catch a Rising Star together, you know, in those days they wouldn't put two women on after each other.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
It was like horrifying, horrifying, you know, like, okay, there's the singer, then the ventriloquist, then the monkey act, you know, it was just, how are two women on the same show?
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. She is one of the all time best.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I have seen the documentary on what is affectionately, unaffectionately called The Weird Year of SNL. Yeah. When Lauren came back. And I remember I auditioned at the comic strip to be a performer. And Al Franken, the great Al Franken. Yeah.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
And Jim Downey, as you know, famous head writer came to first showcase and I did well. And they came over to me afterwards and they were like, would you want to think about being a writer? And I was like, what I want to be. Yeah. So I lived in California and they said, well, come in and have a meeting with Lauren. So I came into New York.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
So I'm ready for my, you know, I had it all planned, you know, an hour of what I could say to, you know, perspective, perspective questions, blah, blah, blah. And it was literally, Lauren was auditioning talent in that big kind of like studio room in Broadway. I don't know where they held the auditions.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
it always looked like where they put audition dances for like a chorus, you know, like, no, and two, three, four, you know, but, and I came and they said, okay, Lauren's going to meet with you now. He came outside and, the door of the audition room. And he said, you know, they've said very good things about you. I said, Oh, thank you. And you know, the job, I don't do a good Lauren impression.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
So somebody could do this for me, but.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Well, it was almost exactly like that. You have been told that Tuesday nights are late and you, you work very late. And I went, yeah, no. Okay. So it lasted about a minute.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. It was a crazy, I love that documentary about, uh, the year because it was crazy and it was nutty, but I still, you know, I always like to tell young people, you know, we wrote a long hand on yellow pads. Yeah.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. Um, so that was it. And then I was really the only woman writer that year, but you know, it was amazing. Uh, like murderer's row of writers, like Smigel was an apprentice.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. I always teased him. Apprentice means you need to wear goggles in the writer's room. You know, John Swartzwelder and Jack Handy and George Meyer. Meyer and Don Novello. And it was just amazing, but I've heard a lot of stuff on, I have to say, I look back and it was like, I got, you know, I wrote a lot with Franken. We did this sketch. Yeah.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
You know, a lot of people don't know, as you guys know, you can write a sketch and have it at read through. And if they pass on it, you can bring it back a few more times.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Yeah. And then Tom Hanks finally. Yeah. Put it over the finish line.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
cast well it was um dennis miller of course right yeah okay thanks for the call shout out leafer okay good um you know it was nora dunn joan sack uh denitra vance um Then the guys. Was it Terry Sweeney? It was Terry Sweeney. It was Randy Quaid.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
Anthony Michael Hall. Robert Downey Jr., who I just saw at the Oscars.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
It's like, I remember you skateboarding down the halls of the 17th floor. Yeah, no, it was, you know, they talk about in the documentary, Lauren hired actors more than comedians. And it's that sort of, oh, and Lovitz, Lovitz was a cast member and he did really well that year. I think he and Dennis were the, and Nora were the only people that were brought back after that.
Fly on the Wall with Dana Carvey and David Spade
Carol Leifer
I wish I remembered who wrote that. Yeah. And then do you remember when Madonna came back the next year to host? She apologized for the entire 85, 86 season.