Captain Glenn
Appearances
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
He said, no, hold on. I'm let me, let me get a monologue ready in my head. I'm going to tell this kid off. No one's ever seen a tell off like this. Well, you just wait for it. Hey, chase.
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
Well, thank you for doing that. I'm going to reward you for being a good little boy and give you $1,500. Wait a minute!
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
Ashley Savoni, she don't take no baloney.
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
Get a bee in your bonnet with Lacey B. Rigging the funk, it's Leslie Plunkett. She gets an A from us, it's Lindsay B. Let's give a kisserino to Lisa Lino.
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
We're taking the gold with Brenda Silva. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides.
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender.
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
You know, I thought, cut them a little slack, you know, when I lived in a cave. God, I love caves. You know, sometimes we would need a drink to get by, so I understood. And it's the end of the season, they've been working hard. And you know, I don't feel good taking 100%. I don't think that's fair.
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#2697 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E15: The Gary Stink
And I'm going to be real mean Canada and say they're all still very good looking, talented people. And Glenn, stay on. Stay on their asses. Sorry, I just can't do it. It's Canada. So the crew without a loss of damages gets 2,500 euros. But Daisy, Gary and Keith, they're only going to get 2,000 euros. Really showed them.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
I'm out of with you! I'm out of!
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
As sailors, the seas can be dangerous for literally everybody around us. So we need Saint Carmen, you know, and it's great. She's a patron saint. I don't know if I believe in that stuff, but here's what I do know. Sure seems to turn mermaids on.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
She's such a child. It makes me laugh.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Every season, at least once a season for Gary, we segue into that stupid song.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
I love caves. So cut to a black and white photo of Glenn with an afro. With Jesus standing behind him, like giving a thumbs up. Yeah, we spent a lot of time in caves. And one day this guy just sort of woke up out of nowhere. We thought, oh my God, where'd this guy come from?
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Which is so funny because you see all the shit that they're going through.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
It's not even crunchy. It's smoothie jam. Just swallow it if you need it.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Well, everyone, unfortunately, the primary got attacked by a jellyfish. But, you know, way to go handling the jellyfish sting and especially the apology performance, which was phenomenal. It was like the cave of performances. And Gary, overall, the deck team seems to be really gelling. See what I did there? Gelling. We're working quite well together.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
He's like, one, two, three, four, five. Oh, that's too much. Okay, back to the iPad in bed.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Ashley Savoni. She don't take no baloney.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Get on the right foot with Chrissy Offutt.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Hava Nagila Webber. Know Your Worth with Jason Kerr.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Kristen the Piston Anderson. Rigging the Funk, it's Leslie Plunkett. She Gets a Name from Us, it's Lindsay Dee. Let's Give a Kisserino to Lisa Lino. Always Killin' It, it's Lola Alcalani. We Love Her on the Rocks, it's Melissa Cox. Megan Berg. You can't have a burger without the Berg.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Let's get real with Caitlin O'Neal. Don't get salty with Christine Pepper. Can't have a meal without the Emily sides.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Let's go on a bender with Lauren Fender. She's a whiz, it's Liz Sarthy. The incredible, edible Matthew Sisters.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
She ain't no shrinkin' Violet Couture. We love you guys.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
Literally nobody does anything to a jellyfish.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
The procession is at 8.15. We should. We should go in the tender and have a look around. We'll do dinner. I mean, they're going to love it. They are going to love it. I personally love the procession.
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#2657 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E11: Broadway Stinger
When I was in the 70s, I would love to go to processions. I would sit in that cave and watch the boats go by. It was wonderful.
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
Actually, it's a fish knife, you fucking idiot. Get off my boat. Unfortunately, an education in fine dining isn't on the menu for you, dear. I live in a van and I still know more about luxury than you do. Get off my boat.
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
She's like, oh, for fuck's sake, Glenn!
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
Yeah, I appreciate it. It's like, okay, give me a hug.
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
I didn't even say caves. Flashes up again.
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
so then now it's time for a preference sheet meeting okay everyone the primary her name is detox and this is a world-famous drag queen superstar from Chicago she's thrilled to finally be taking a vacation and she's bringing along her sister Heather along with fellow drag queen Lola LaCroix and three other friends her friend mark is an adult film director it's his first time back in Ibiza hey
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
Why are you guys funny? Did someone make a joke about caves?
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
And then it's like, oh my God, come on, hurry up, hurry up. We got to get the food out to them.
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
Well, I'm very, very sorry for that because that should never happen. Obviously, we dropped the ball here. Could I offer you as compensation a 45-minute lecture about life in a cave, growing up, spending time, being near nurses, etc.?
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#2678 Below Deck Sailing Yacht S05E13: Drag Her!
I'd be married by now. What were we talking about? And by the way, in case you haven't seen the season trailer, we do fall quite a bit. It's kind of hilarious.