Brenda Williams
Appearances
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
Hello, I'm Brenda, and I'd like to share with you how Worth came to be defined in my family by a set of pots and pans. And we have to go back to when I was about three years old, growing up in London. My parents emigrated from Jamaica to England before I was born, and there was never enough money.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
So my mom would go to Freddy the Butcher, and she would get these scraps and turn them into these really delicious... savory stews and soups. And at that age, I thought it was some kind of sorcery, some kind of kitchen magic, total mystery. And it was around that time that the door-to-door salesman came calling, and he came with these stainless steel pots
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
lots of them with every imaginable insert, broiling, steaming, you know, everything, whatever. Anyway, I don't know what it was about these pots, but they ignited in my mum some kind of fierce longing, enough that she entered an instalment arrangement with this man that she could in no way afford. So she struggled through it, And I was about six years old when the box arrived.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
And I had elder siblings who were not interested in the box, but I was. And I remember my mom made me wash my hands. So I washed my hands, and we opened the box, and we took out the pots one by one, and we oohed and aahed over their magnificence. And I figured that the kitchen magic at this point would take on some kind of upgrade, but my mom had a different idea.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
She took the pots, put them back in the box, and put them on top of the fridge. And that's where they stayed. And I remember just every year, once or twice a year, I would beg, oh, mommy, mommy, can we look at the pots? And she would take them down from the box, ooh, ah, back in the box, up on the fridge.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
And I realize now that she felt the pots were too good to be used, or more specifically, too good for her to use. But I was little and I fretted. I thought the pots were lonely up there. I was really afraid that they would be sad that they weren't being used for their proper purpose. Then I became a tween and a teenager, and I stopped thinking about them altogether.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
Until, when I was 14, my family emigrated to America, New Jersey, land of all good things. LAUGHTER And yeah, New Jersey. And so my mum packed up all her precious things, including the pots, and the box was dilapidated by then, so she got a new box. And they went on top of the fridge in our New Jersey apartment. And at that point, I asked her, Mom, you know, why don't you just use them?
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
Just use them. And she gave me this little smug smile, and she said, Not just yet. So in the meantime, she trained to be a nurse in England but could only get night work. And so I took over making the family dinner, which was truly awful. You know, we're talking tuna casserole, hamburger helper, until eventually I learned some of her skills.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
I also learned that the key to kitchen magic, it's in the hands that do the work It's in the love that goes into the process. And it's also in the imagination in terms of how you work the ingredients. So remember, not just yet. That became a reality when at 31, I married a highly educated man. And my mom gifted us the box of pots on my wedding day.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
And my highly educated groom, he looked askance at this pot. There were much more sophisticated brands, all clad, Le Creuset, whatever. Anyway, I felt that my pots would not feel welcome in my fancy new home. And so we didn't use them. And eventually, I did not feel welcome in that home. And it took 14 years of marriage before I got my divorce.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
And I packed up my precious things, including my box of pots, which had been unused for 40 years. And I now use them every day. Thank you, thank you. I experiment with them, I bang about, I singe their bottoms all the time, and my friends and family, they sigh around my dining room table. They breathe in those savory scents, and they often eat much more than they plan to, which thrills me.
The Moth
The Moth Radio Hour: The Future Looks Bright
You know, I've adjusted my thinking, It's still the hands, and it's still the love, and it's still the imagination. But for me, the kitchen magic is also those pots. And I am finally worthy, as my mother always was, even if she didn't know it. Thank you.