Blake Griffin
Appearances
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Are you a car guy, Blake? I'm not really. Me neither. I like, I just, I don't know. Yeah. I appreciate people who have like nice cars, but I just like, I don't know. I can just drive an old car. Like, I don't know. It just seems like inconvenient.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
They look really cool. Which is really fun to drive, but it's also kind of like every time I hit the gas pedal, I'm like, this is the last drive.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Oh, look, there's a... Wait, how does that work? Oh, that's the... What's going on here? Why is there a picture of me? Oh, was there?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I moved to Brentwood, and I was like, you know what I need? A white Bronco. Yes. I got a white Bronco. Fuck it. How long do you play in L.A.? It was like eight years? Nine years in L.A. Yeah, two and a half in Detroit.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
It was me for Avery Bradley, Boban, you know, the 73 guy. I love Boban. Yeah, John Wick. And Tobias Harris and like a pick or two. Damn, though. You're worth more than that, though. Thanks, man. I appreciate that. I actually needed to hear that.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
How about the Knicks last night, huh? Don't fuck it. Let's talk about it. You were on a run. You had a good run. Just the most miserable fans in all of sports. Always upset. I'm thrilled.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
This is the coolest team since the 90s. No, it'll be one of the best teams to lose in the second round. Do you really think we're going to lose in the second round? I mean, it depends on your matchup, but yeah. Woo! You heard it here first. They're all going to be dead tired. I'm sorry.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Barkley and Shaq are such haters, man. I'm not going to. My plan is to not trash the Knicks. Or any team for that matter. You know what I will do? I will go at GMs, I will go at owners, and I will go at coaches to a certain extent.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Because I'm just tired of like, and this is probably like the former player just being like, I'm just like, I was sick of those guys just shitting on us every opportunity. The Clippers. Well, no, just players in general. I think that's just what the TNT guys do. And that's probably the best sports show ever. Maybe of all time. It might be the best show of all... It's insane.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I'm excited to hear his like... Just like his... We don't hear him like... That's true. That much, right? You don't hear him like... Especially since he's retired, you don't hear his analysis, but his basketball IQ is insanely high. I'm excited to hear him give takes.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I just like, I don't know. So I had this same thing about when LeBron went to Miami. I was just like, you know, and everybody was just shitting on everything he did, right? And it was just kind of like... It kind of sucks because you guys aren't appreciating how good he is. And that was like truly the height of his career, right? Like he was unbelievable in Miami.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And people were just shitting on him. I was one of the people. I hated him. I mean, I guess I get it to a certain extent. But it's also like separate what he did. to who he is as a player. And just appreciate how good he is.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Which is like, I don't know. I feel like people lost three, four years of his career where people were just like, they hated him. That's true. I think that's a good point. And it's like, you kind of got to like, I get that you don't like the guy for what he did, but also appreciate how good he is. Yeah. It's two sides.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He thinks that show is the best show that came out on TV. And he's like, you gotta watch it. You gotta watch it. So we're out at this golf tournament and he's like, hey, just come here. Oh, put it on. Wait, that's supposed to be Doc Rivers, right? And Ed O'Neill. Oh yeah, that's Doc. Yeah. Ed O'Neill is... Donald Sterling.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
oh wow this is like a real that was like a real clip like that that that was actually the one thing that i watched that like actually happened that that white party that that donald sterling has right um oh this looks fun i haven't even heard of this yeah but was it bad well so like obviously ed o'neill and um Lawrence Fishburne were great. Yeah.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
After that, it takes a sharp... Because you've got to cast basketball guys who can kind of play. DeAndre Jordan's character is 6'1". He's almost a 7-foot guy. Right. You're looking at a dude who's just clearly a very average height guy.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I honestly did. I watched 15 minutes of the first episode with Wayne, and I was like, I can't watch this. Wait, Wayne Gretzky made you watch with him? By the way, that was his third time watching the show.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah. And do you see the thing behind the scenes with how they shot the basketball? Yeah, they were on skates or something? Rollerblades. I thought Winning Time.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
So I think that like – I don't know. I think to be honest, like I'm a tough critic on sports – Scripted shows yeah, and I thought that it was like it was better than anything. I've seen recently Yeah, basketball.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
yeah I mean she's just been on a run killing it I mean she's always been like roast she's always killed it and then like that Tom Brady roast like put her yep and now you know like I assume like she's just on the fast track to whatever she wants now arenas I think she's gonna be doing arenas she's gonna be huge I think Honestly, I don't see much of her stand-up, but I see all of her roasts.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
You know you see clips of everybody. I just don't see much of her stand-up, but I see all of her roast stuff.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
billion it's insane i heard that um their budget for the tom brady live roast was like 40 million that makes sense and they gotta pay all those players but like those the people in the roast don't get paid that much no that's yeah tom got paid a lot but then they they blew it out for like
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
marketing for you know I assume that doing live stuff on Netflix is insanely expensive what do you think the budget for the one we just did was 500 that was rough bad was that Jeff Ross's like thing yes end of the year thing yeah he was directed it pretty much he was high the whole time it was it was a mess yeah
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, punch down people who can't say anything back. Diddy and Luigi.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
How much did they cut? A good amount. How many minutes did you guys do?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I just love comedy. Love it. I will always... do any i i just i watch and i watch insanely like uh Random comedies. Oh, cool. Give us some. What do you watch? I mean, like, I follow, like, stand-up, like, a lot. And, like, my whole algorithm is probably, like, every fourth video is just, like, a random comedian.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And I'll just go down the rabbit hole and, I don't know, I just, I love it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Should we just take a gander? Oh, Norm is just all over my For You page. The king.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
That was, uh, yeah, I was doing, I was going to Just for Laughs right after that. So I was like trying to work out some stuff for it. And, um,
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I think that said, I was really leaning into, I get it. I understand. It's so weird that I'm here right now. Also, the fact that somebody would be like, and now up to the stage, Blake Griffin, and people would clap. I'm like, why are you clapping? Yeah. Like, I could be horrible. That's true. It's like going to an NBA game and they're like, all right, now starting at center, Kevin Hart.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
You're like, what? You shouldn't clap for that. You're like, I got screwed.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I mean, Jamal. I was talking about this with my brother. He has to have the... His last game of his career scored 51. I know. Jesus. Kobe did 60. Oh, yeah. Okay, so yes.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I mean, you guys have Walt Frazier and Breen. The best ever. That's like an unreal team-specific broadcast. It's insane. It's unreal.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
You talk about... You talk about... Oh, ball. It was just... Wow. A couple of defensive highlights.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
That game right there is like the game that I always kind of like to help you. Like my life completely changed after that game. Wow. How did it change? It just went – like, you know, like you play in college. You get drafted. You start playing. You know, you think like, all right, like, you know, like people – The basketball world, like, knows who you are.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And then that game was just, like... It just went, like, through the roof.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Like, you're just, like, walking around. Like, people would just come up to me talking about that dunk or, like, that game. And it was, like... By the way, it kind of goes unnoticed, but I think Amari had like 47 on me that game, and I could do nothing with him. That was when he was just on a tear.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
What I just realized is, you know, Denny Advia. Oh, yeah. He's from Israel, not Jewish. What? He's not Jewish? What? Yeah, I just learned. Oh, by the way, I should probably preface this with the person I heard this from is a complete idiot. So I don't know if I can trust him. Okay.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Wait, hold on. Amari Bailey, how is he Jewish? Is he Jewish? We're just adding people at this point.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Who is that? Camila. A lady and a Jew? This could be tough. That's a... Oh, Blake Peters. A fellow Blake. Hey. That's a short list.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
we go nope and a little bit of a facade yeah it was exciting for a while sort of a chameleon that way just kind of blend everyone's claiming you yeah that's kind of cool i always i i had a joke in stand-up i was like i'm like uh like undercover boss but only for finding out who's racist like especially on airplanes people are like hey brother how you doing oh yeah it's a
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I mean, you know, she's fucking, you know, they're taking over. You're like, oh, he doesn't realize that I'm half black yet. Right. Have you had an N-bomb?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
You know, when a black dude calls you the N-word for the first time, you're like, oh. Great feeling. Yeah, one of my best moments.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah. What's he say? He's like, so-and-so, why it again? And they go like this. So good.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah. I met Neil, fuck, 2000, I think it was 2011, ESPYs. He was writing for Seth Meyers. Uh-huh. And I met him doing a sketch, and then after that, we just, yeah, he kind of became my mentor. Mentor.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
yeah like he just kind of like took me under his wing he was like the one person that was like you you got you got to start like writing stuff like start just write write jokes and so he convinced me to kind of like keep a notes folder of like jokes and i had nothing to do with it forever and then i decided to like do some stand-up which is like an insane idea yeah terrifying
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And are you like, are you like, I thought of this on the walkover or the car ride. Sure, yeah. I'll do it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
DeAndre was, like, the guy who, like, is, like, so... He just... It's, like, effortless for him to, like...
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
walk into a room and like make these people feel like he's like connected with them and make a joke and then walk into like a completely different demographic of a room and like fit in there and he's he was like the guy that kind of kept us all together kept things light he's he's very very funny is this a clip oh this is a great clip yeah oh this went viral oh yeah is this a really good question norm you're already into it from uh from blake's good friend
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
That's cute. I'll try as hard as I can next year. I don't know. I don't know. Thank you for that question. That's great. He just showed up to, that was my Rookie of the Year, like, press conference, like, when I got the award. He just showed up. No one was like, hey, Norm's coming. He just showed up and just sat in the audience and just raised his hand.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
They're like, does anybody have any questions? And he's just like, boom, first one.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I don't even think I did. Wow, that's crazy. Because I had no... I didn't realize... Maybe I saw him from a distance before everybody sat down, but yeah. Were you a big Norm guy? Huge. I mean, he's one of my all-time favorites. Yeah, same. He is... You know what's crazy? I just heard, you know that moth joke that he told?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He told him the joke, and it's a very short- It's like 30 seconds. Yeah, and he made it into a 10-minute joke. Yeah. It was eight minutes, whatever.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I can't imagine trying to just turn a 30-second joke into eight minutes of- And it was all funny. I know. I mean, I guess some of it you're just like, what the fuck? What's happening? Yeah. He's a kook. Speaking of Neil Brennan, he's the one who, remember when Clayton Bixby takes his hood off? Yeah. Neil's face is the one that blows up. Do you remember that at the end of the sketch? Oh, yeah.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Imagine going out for that casting part as a white dude. Bill Burr is in this. Okay. He's in this sketch. Yeah. You want to see my face?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Dude, so this came out when I was in high school, and it was, like, one of those shows that, like, it came out on Wednesday nights. If you didn't watch that. Yep. Thursday, you were left out of the conversation. Totally. Everybody was just repeating and quoting that show.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Even the ones that they, like, said, like, didn't work out as well. I remember when they had the Player Haters Ball where they time traveled. I remember that. And they ended up turning it into, like, I think they were doing, like, sketches that, like, didn't work out. Even those were just, like, incredible.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Kind of depends. I mean, I love The Office. I love Arrested Development. I could just kind of go down. I've always been a huge SNL fan. I was just powering through the bad years. I'd watch every episode and just hope that there was a good sketch. I think this season is as good as it's been. It's cooking right now.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
It's really hard for a basketball player because you basically have to host the first episode of the year, and that's always reserved. LeBron did, I think, the first episode. Oh, yeah. You're made for it, though, man.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
That's true. Come on, guys. What the hell? We've got some good ideas. Besides you, who's a really funny NBA player? All right, so there's tiers, right? There's the guys who aren't trying to be funny that are funny. Like Kawhi? Yeah, I mean, like, yeah, yeah, yeah. I would say, like, everybody had that run of, like, man, Kawhi's hilarious. And it's kind of like you're like, is he, though?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I mean, yeah, and I honestly don't know him personally really well. I mean, I freaking love his game. This is great. Have you seen this? Oh, man.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I mean, he's insane. I mean, I've heard from his teammates, he's fun and funny and loose. But it's awkward.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Who else is funny? You know who's really funny? Jamal Crawford is hilarious. He speaks in, like, he always has, like, these sayings where he's like, mm. He goes, mm, fam. Did you talk to him at all when you were playing? Yeah, a little bit. He probably didn't give you the whole, but he's like, mm, fam. You know what? There's lines on the highway for a reason, so everybody doesn't go.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He just says stuff, and you're just like, how did you come up with that?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He just has all these kind of old man sayings, and he always starts like, mm, fam. He's got a catchphrase. Dude, he's hilarious. It's hard to beat Barkley as a funny guy. Dude, Barkley is... So funny. He's just so good. I was at a golf event, and he was there, and we would go sit at the bar at night, and he would like... He just, like, entertains.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And people come up to him, and he's so good with people. Like, he's just like, hey, yeah, bro. And he makes people feel special, and he goes back to his thing. It's like a true talent. Yeah. It's truly incredible how good he is with people. That show is special. Oh, it's insane.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Dude, so at this golf thing, TNT was putting it on, and I got to be on the desk. When Chuck was out playing, I kind of filled in for him.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Nate, yeah. I was playing with Nate. Watching Ernie navigate just like the dull moments and just bring people in and ask a question and throw it to this and read a read a sponsorship like it was insane. Wow. He's so good at it. It's like it's like such a special skill that I don't think people realize how good he is at it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I agree. And Shaq is just like just shitting on guys. It's insane. I kind of feel bad for Dwight Howard. Yeah. Really? You're like, leave him alone now.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I think so, yeah. And then Dwight was a great player. Dwight was unbelievable. The first time I really got my bell rung hard, Dwight Howard went up and goaltended one of my shots and came down, and he used to, like, when he would, like, jump and come down, I don't know if he was doing it on purpose, but he would just let his elbows just fly.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And I took a Dwight Howard elbow, like, to the temple, and I remember, like, just kind of, like, going back. It was the first time I saw, like, actual stars. Oh, yeah. And I was kind of like... I was just completely taken aback. He was so strong. It made you feel like a little kid. Where you're just a little bit helpless. He could pick you up and my feet would just be dangling.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He was like, no, put me down. It was nuts playing against him in his prime.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I mean, that was... Oh, man. Wheelchair basketball has more action than this.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Trying to think, okay, what can I say? Come on, PR. Come on.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Britney Spears. God, I'm trying to think. So me, Britney Griner. Crazy night at Moscow. We're on our way to Russia. Things took a turn after that. It was actually my hashish oil. Just tucked it away in her bag. Took the fall.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
What a time. I know, that was dark. Then we traded her for an arms dealer. The merchant of death. That's it. Quite possibly one of the coolest nicknames of all time. I know. If it wasn't for him.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
She's unbelievable. It's pretty cool. It's also, like, it's just kind of crazy to watch her, like, come in, and it was, like, the thing that the WNBA has been waiting for. Yeah. Like, there's great players in the WNBA, but, like, she's been, like, she is... She's, like, transcended basketball. Yeah. And then everybody was just like, well... We didn't want it like this. You know what?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
We wanted to be in the spotlight, but hold on. Right. It was just kind of like, why aren't you guys just lifting her up?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I've always wanted to say this. For shizzle. Yeah, I mean, dude, she is holy shit.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I feel like people, it doesn't really hit the same way when you're retired.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
No, I think you're making it, dude. I don't know. We'll see. It's not one of those things. I truly don't think about it very much. And if it happens, that's awesome. But if it doesn't, I'm not, you know. If you need some guys to look at your speech... Throwing a joke? By the way, if I do, that speech will just be, it will just be riddled with just probably the worst jokes you ever heard.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
But it's just going to be a set. Yeah. Do a set, man. It's like I'm, you know, what am I going to, basketball gave me everything.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Why are you so angry? Never enough. He's calling out like people, players that people forgot about. He's like, deadlift shrimp. I remember what you said. I mean, that's also like, those guys can't turn it off. That's what made him so good. Have you met MJ? Oh, yeah. And what's that like? He's awesome. He's just the coolest. He's just a guy's guy. I mean, I was a Jordan athlete for years.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And he's probably one of the coolest people. That's what adds to his GOAT thing. He's just awesome. You don't see many clips where you're like, nah, it was corny. You know what I mean? You'll be like, oh, God, he really kind of went at those people. You know, like that. But, like, you're never like, yeah, he's just awesome.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
corner like throwing quarters spoken like a true stand-up you gotta go on yeah that's a good point like your set's up in five minutes michael they're calling your name but yeah he was an animal with the uh with the gambling he is awesome for years my uh michael jordan story that i would always tell was uh the Dennis Rodman story that he told in The Last Dance where he went to Vegas.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
It was always my go-to, what's a Michael Jordan story? And he told that on Last Dance and now I don't have a good story. It was always my, you wanna hear something cool? I told that story, and then he told it. I was like, fuck. I got nothing now.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I mean, you'll never take L.A. away from the Lakers or the Lakers or whatever. You guys get it. But, like, yeah, there was a good stretch of, like – The Lakers kind of being pretty down and, like, him getting hurt and stuff. But, like, dude, Kobe was – in L.A., he is just – he's God. Yeah. He is untouchable. It was, like, truly, like – I don't know how to describe it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
The first time I actually met him, I was doing rehab. My first year I got hurt, I was doing rehab. And the lady who was doing my rehab was his PT. And so I'm sitting there in the PT clinic and And I remember kind of just like sitting there. I had like heat, you know, you do ice and heat to start. And I'm sitting there and I kind of like look up and like the energy in the room shifted.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I'm not like a big like the energy has changed. And I was just like, what's going on? Everybody got a little quiet. And I look over and Kobe's like standing at the door. And I was just like, Oh, this is like, this is, this is different. Yeah. Like he just like everywhere he went, it was just like, uh, it was, it was so, I don't know. It's like, it was like seeing God.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I think the term now, what the kids are saying is code switching. Yes, that's it. Yeah, I definitely, yeah. I'm doing Mello's podcast right after this. By the way, if you want to see a stark contrast, it's going to be me with glasses on and I'm going to have a chain on and I'm going to be like, yeah, Kobe was dope as fuck.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I don't know. You kind of like, you know, it's natural. Yeah, I don't know. For me, it's like it was kind of kind of natural. Now there's a term for it, code switching.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
See, that was kind of, like, the thing that was, like, in the media. Exactly, yeah. Like, we, I was actually, I was talking to JJ Redick about this, like, not that long ago, like, a month ago. And it was, like, we were close. Yeah. Like, we all, we liked each other. We, like, enjoyed spending time together.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
It's just like years of losing in the playoffs kind of eats at you and then the spotlight and people just trying to tear you apart, it takes its toll. So you weren't as bad as they made you seem? No, no. People tried to make it seem like we hated each other, we had bad... It was like one of my...
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Ep 216: Blake Griffin
all-time favorite teams like those years yeah we we had it down we just never we never won it was a sick team i mean it was like that's like a looking back that's like a pretty crazy starting line i mean cp jj uh deandre jordan jamal crawford barnes was a great defender you know yeah we had we had unreal i mean and there was a stretch too where we had like
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Lamar Odom, Grant Hill, like we had Chauncey Billups. We had like insane names. And it was like, it was a fun run. Yeah.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I mean, honestly, yeah, but it's great because it raises your, you know, you have to be great. Yeah. Because otherwise you feel like you're letting people down. Exactly.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah. It was like an emotional drain. So we were playing Golden State. We lose game one at home, win game two, go to Golden State, win game three. So now, you know, it's 2-1. And Friday night we get a text like, hey, like not emergency meeting, but like it was a random meeting. So we go downstairs and Doc is like – You know, we got word that something's coming out tomorrow about Donald Sterling.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
They got something, you know, whatever, you know, business as usual. And we're like, all right, all good. I wake up Saturday morning, and I think it came out, you know, at like 8 o'clock East Coast time. So I wake up 8 o'clock West Coast time. I have like 174 texts. And I'm like, what the fuck is going on? Oh, no. Reverend Jesse Jackson had texted me like, you guys gotta boycott.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And we're just like, all these people were calling for us to boycott and we're like, we just went the whole season to get to this point. Why would we boycott now? Yeah. It's not like we're lining up and being like, all right, Donald Sterling on three. We're playing for ourselves. We're playing for our families, fans.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And we went out and we lost game four, went back home, won game five, went back to Golden State, won game six, and then we won an emotional game seven. And then... Who did we play? Oh, Oklahoma City. That was like KD, right? KD's MVP year. Went to Oklahoma City, won game one. Yeah. Lost game two. And then we were like up seven with like 40-some seconds to play in game five in Oklahoma City.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
and just complete meltdown. But we were emotionally drained from that. That Donald Sterling thing was insane. I've never heard Staples Center louder than game five when we came back home. Fans were there 45 minutes before tip-off. We ran out of the tunnel. They had blacked out all the logos. Everybody was wearing black, which is kind of funny now. Sterling was wearing it on his face.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I just have to throw shade at them because I'm a Knicks fan. You guys have a great team, by the way.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I mean, you guys have a lot of talent. You know what's gonna happen probably in the playoffs? They're all gonna be dead tired. Because of Tibbs? Yeah, they're just gonna be tired. And he's a great coach. They're just gonna be fucking tired. We just need some depth, and then we're okay if we get some depth this time.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, my buddy last night was like, we statistically have the best, we have the highest scoring starting five of all time. And my brother Taylor was like, and how's their bench? And he was like, god awful. It's like, yeah, it's like sweet. But if we get a bench, I think if we get a couple guys.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He's incredible. Peyton Pritchard. My first week in Boston after practice, they're like, you want to play ones? Which is one-on-one at the end of practice. And one-on-one in the NBA is like you get two dribbles and it's very controlled. You're from a certain spot. It's like Peyton gets the ball and I'm up on defense. And he's just like, and I was like, you know what? I'm good. I don't need this.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
We do it with each other, and it's always awkward. So I have this, like, notes folder that I've had since probably 2008. this is exciting. I mean, it's, it goes, it goes on and on and on. And it's just, some of it's like, I've worked it out. Some of it I've worked out. And some of it's just like, they might just, I, you go back and read it and you're like, what the fuck was I thinking?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Let's see if I have one, too, just to make it feel less weird, because I got the same notes. Okay, here's a good example of things that aren't funny, but it was just like a thing in my head, and I don't know where I'll ever use it. This isn't for stand-up, but what I wrote down was a Jamaican man named Jafriup and last name Steen. It's like, Joffrey Epstein.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
No, no, no, from the islands, Joffrey Epstein. That's funny. So, like, I don't know how I'm ever going to use that. I think it's a character in a script. Yes, that's what it is. You've got to make that guy, yeah. That's a good example of, like, just, like, shit where if you read this notes fully, you'd be like, that's the stupidest, like, this is all dumb.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Big ups to Joffrey Epstein. Joffrey Epstein. Yeah, it's like stuff like that. Where it's like, it might not ever, How about this one?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Or I have what I need to work out is substitutions and timeouts at regular jobs, not just sports. So it's like the idea is good, but I don't have any jokes for it. Great premise. That could be a sketch, I think. Where it's just like time... And a lot of my stand-up is like... Early on, I tried to shy away from writing sports stuff because I was like, that's hacky. I want to write real jokes.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And I saw this Seth Rogen interview one time where he was doing stand-up when he was like 13. And he talks about how he came off stage one time. He was like, I went out and I did okay.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
And he's like this older comedian an established comedian in Canada was like how old you he's like 13 He's like well write about 13 year old shit, and I I saw that and I was like you know what I should write sports stuff Yeah, you know I like the one thing I know and it's more authentic and it's interest and it sets you apart Yeah, so I always had like it so I I always had this like thought it's honestly probably in my notes folder way back but it was like
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I would walk down the street in LA and people would be like, from across the street, they'd be like, go Lakers. And I was just like, how insane is that? I don't see my UPS guy and be like, go FedEx. Why are you yelling that at me? I don't care who you cheer for. It'd be insane to think that everybody has to be a fan of the team that I'm on.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
But also like think about calling a timeout in the middle of surgery. Right. It's like, oh. Get the music going to you. You sit on like a bench and you're just like. This guy's like flatlining. You have to get the TNT music.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He had nothing. I'm like, how do you, I want to hear your take on the Luigi stuff. Yeah. Because I'm like. I get it. Insurance companies, they're awful. But it's also like, I can't be the one that decides who lives and dies. Of course.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He's more than hot. I don't know. There's so many layers to it. I don't know how to feel about it, to be honest. It's one of those things I can't decide.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I think he ate in at McDonald's. He didn't go just pick it up. He didn't Postmate.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
He's just like, yeah, I'll have the number four. Yeah. And I'll be right over here at this booth. Like, we got him.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
You know so it's yeah He brought light to a situation that is clearly fucked, but nothing's gonna change Yeah, by the way he that CEO answers to a board and then they're also just gonna appoint a new one.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
The CEO? By the way, what a great point. They're like, well, obviously, what was his name?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Obviously, Brian's not going to be here today. But I think he would have wanted us to go on. Keep scamming people. By the way, that's such a great point. That's all you need to know about that situation. I don't know. I kind of struggle with the thought of it. I'm just like... I get it.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah. Which, like, I get it. He brought light to, like, a fucked up situation, but also it's just, like...
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Let's talk about what else was going on. A lot of people don't talk about that. Exactly.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Yeah, I guess that's true. Not that mug shot. Yeah, let's pull up Nick Nolte, sexy. I mean, I see. I get it. Really?
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I guess. I mean, I feel like now, Sexiest Man of the Year, they're just like, they're trying to make a splash. Yeah. Like, you know what? We're going to pick the guy who no one's expecting.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
You never saw this? I mean, I have seen it, but I kind of forgot that he looked like, wow.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
I can see it. What is she, 6'3"? I don't know how tall she is, but she is tall. Damn, that's crazy. I saw her one time in person in heels and it was just like 6'8". Wow. Damn.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Well, it kind of blows my mind that we're having these talks. Of course. Because it's just like, I mean, yeah, sure, everybody's like, you know, LeBron, oh, LeBron, he sucks. Dude, like if you, he's, yeah, I mean, it'd be, it's tough to guard.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
Could he get there? Yeah. I think like being one and done in college, I mean, it probably would have served him better to like, you know, but like if you can get drafted, go get drafted. There you go. I have zero issues with him getting drafted at the 56 pick. Yeah. I have zero issues with the Lakers being like, all right, we're going to do this.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
The thing that I think they probably messed up on is don't give them $8 million guaranteed. Yeah. Like, give him what is normal for that big. He's going to be okay financially. Yeah. Right. He made 10 times that in NIL. Yeah. Really? Maybe not 10 times, but he's made his own money. Sure. Right? And he also doesn't ever have to worry about money.
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
So it's like, just give him the normal thing, and you'll get everybody off his back. Let him just, like...
We Might Be Drunk
Ep 216: Blake Griffin
have him play the g league and like i don't know was he flying private for the g league games i don't i have no idea if that's true that's crazy i heard i don't know that's confirmed but well by the way he was i mean he only played a certain amount of road games so no i i honestly probably wasn't really like i don't know like wouldn't you want to be with the guys i just think it's yeah i i agree with that but it's like can you imagine being like just like standing there waiting to board and you're like