Barbie
Appearances
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
Hello? Hello, Barbie? Yes, I can't hear you. Just a minute. There we go. Hi there.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
Yes. I, yeah. Megan called me yesterday. Yeah. I know all about you and I'm so glad that you're doing this. I mean, this is a lot of hard work and it's very complicated. I know that.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
Yeah. I was. I knew that she was missing and I knew what she was wearing because everybody knew what to look for. It was quite a journey. I could look down and I could see her in the book. And I saw her aqua top and I just hollered and I said, this is Barbie. I see her. And so I knew enough to stand in place and not go down.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
because it was going to be an instant crime scene, because Beach Conger, the physician, he was on his way, and he did come shortly after. And so we proceeded from there. And, yeah, you know, the life with Heidi has been very precious and sweet. Megan was so good to her. They were best friends. And we loved her. We loved her. We loved her a lot.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
You know, but she was stuck in a family and with a faith that she didn't want any part of. Zoe's had kind of a shady reputation down on Martinsville Road because of the, you know, covered bridge. And then there was a pull off, you know, by a little dam. And so that's where kids used to go and do their, you know, you know, trade their pot or whatever they were doing back in those days. And
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
You know, and town drunks would sometimes go down there and hang out. So Martinsville Road is nothing that I ever would have walked on by myself, even back then. I knew the road very well. I did. And I do know that people along the way had seen her. So she was spotted and she, you know, running along the road. But what happened is a mystery.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
Beach Conger, Dr. Conger, when he got there, I walked down a little bit closer, but I stayed where I had to stay. And he actually came across the brook to see me. And he just said to me, you know, you okay? And I said, yeah, I'm fine, because at least now I know she's at peace. And I said, but Beach, I haven't been any closer than this. And he goes, you want to know where Megan was?
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
And I said, she's, you know, she's at school. And so, um, and I said, so is the other best friend, Shelly Morris. And he looked at me and he says, I think you need to go and pick up Shelly and Megan. He says, cause we'll, we'll keep this tight as long as we can, but I, you think you need to go get them.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
But what I heard, I don't know if your stuff is showing this too, but there's that, there was that one building that was still on the property that was there from when the fair was there. I heard from some of the searchers that you could tell that there was some kind of a situation around the building and there were like three sets of feet.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
And it looked like that somebody, you know, it looked like that they were fighting, you know, like they were arguing and stuff like that. And then it looked like that maybe Heidi had been dragged a little. This is all speculation, so please, I don't know. This is a fact.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
I never found out if that was true or anything, but she would have put up one hell of a fight if she could have. I've never trusted Barry. He's always had a shady, shady thing. And of course, Megan, you know, she's told you everything, you know, about after the fact about babysitting and stuff like that. And Barry outside of her window, which I knew about.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
I just know that John was so furious with the fact that Barry was starting to put his face in front of Megan, like trying to follow her and stuff. I know that he was getting ticked. And so we did not know what to do about it. And I can't even remember. I really can't remember. Because we were a working dairy farm. I'd go to bed early, and I was up and in the barn by 3 o'clock in the morning.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
Yes, yes. But we knew about it after the fact, after he, I guess, ran. I don't know where he went. I don't know where his car was. But, yeah, I didn't see him, but I know he was out there.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
You know, she was scared. But Megan, you know, she, I tell you, she has been through an awful lot. And it was just, it's just been devastating ever since that period of time. Because Barry is not somebody that you can feel comfortable with. And I know you've met him and you've met Linda. And I haven't seen him in years. Megan would always tell me. Megan always confided in me and told me things.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
And at the time, you know, you just don't know because Megan was a sophomore when Heidi died. Heidi was a sophomore. And, you know, your kids come in and they tell you things, and you have to believe them. And as the time went on, it was obvious that Megan was right on the money about it. She never trusted him either. So I was not at all surprised.
Dark Valley
Chapter 17 | A Father's Tale
But then when Barbara Agnew, when that happened, that shook me right to my core. Because how, you know, because that's still, that's in Barry's backyard. That's on the thruway.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
So I go into an empty patient room and I sit there and I call the origins number picked up. And I told her, and she was like, you need to get to the birthing center. Remember, I'm at work at a hospital. I come out and I say, why don't I go to the birth center and let them check on me? And they're all begging me. There's one charge nurse. She's crying.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And she's saying, Barbie, please go to the emergency room. Please don't go to the birthing center. They get one of the anesthesiologists whose wife also had preeclampsia. And he's saying, Barbie, please don't go to the birthing center. Please go straight to Baylor. This is a deadly disease that's happening right now. I'm just wanting to crawl out of my skin. I'm in complete denial. Nothing's wrong.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I'm going to go. They're probably going to put me on bed rest and I'm still going to get to have a magical birth because my providers have not told me anything's wrong yet. One of my nurse friends drives me to the birthing center. I've already called my husband and he's on the way. And they said, go in that birthing room and just lay on the bed and relax.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Looking back, when I said my blood pressure is 210 over 117, they should have said, get your F to the emergency room. But they were like, smell some lavender. It will help relax you. I am fully trusting my provider. My husband gets there and he's like, we're going to the emergency room? Like, no, everything's okay. We're just going to relax for now and see where my blood pressure goes.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I remember them taking my blood pressure three or four times until it was 140s over 90s is what they got it back down to while I was laying there. Unbeknownst to me, my friend who has dropped me off is waiting in their little waiting room. And she told me that Amy was like, you need to leave. They're fine. And she's like, aren't y'all going to take her to the emergency room?
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Hi, I'm Barbie. I am a survivor of Origins birth and wellness. I have three beautiful daughters. Only the first one was what I call an Origins shit show. I'm a pediatric nurse. I do orthopedics and I do children. I don't do pregnancy. Two very different worlds. My husband and I had been trying to have a baby for four years and we found out in June of 2018 that
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
She's like, no, she's fine, is what she kept telling her. And I didn't witness this, but this is what my friend told me, kind of like basically didn't want her to witness this thing, I guess. They draw some more labs. I remember like she was standing at the foot of the bed in the downstairs birthing room. And I said, Amy, I am not above a C-section.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
If we need to go to the hospital, tell me and I will go. I will freaking put my hand on the Bible and tell you. She said to me, we're not there yet. There's no need to panic. And we were freaking there. I should have been in the hospital. They sent me home from the birthing center again that Wednesday and said, here's a jug, do a 24-hour urine.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
On Thursday the 10th, my husband took it to the lab or wherever he had to drop it off. The results for the 24-hour urine came back on Friday the 11th. We're at home eating dinner. I don't feel well. I was real swollen. I just really felt out of breath. Amy calls me Friday night, and she said, Hey, Barbie, we got your protein back. It's really high, so guess what?
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
You're going to have a baby tonight. And I didn't understand how high until I'm actually seeing the records now. So just to give context, according to the National Health Institute, the normal amount of protein in your urine for pregnancy is 150 milligrams to 300 milligrams. But mine for 24 hours was 1,440 milligrams. I said, what? What do you mean I'm having a baby tonight? I'm on labor.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
She's like, you need to go to the hospital. They know that you're coming. I said, okay. So I walk out to my husband. I said, hey, apparently I'm getting induced tonight. Then it's the panic because I didn't have a hospital backpack. I was 37 weeks pregnant. So we rush around and pack everything up and we beeline it down to Baylor University Medical Center in Dallas.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I don't understand the gravity of the situation at the time. I walk into L&D. And there is a nurse pacing back and forth in the hall. I walk up to the desk and say, hi, you know, I'm Barbie. I'm here checking in. And I look on her desk and it has my name written big letters, Barbie dash severe preeclampsia. I'm like, why does she have that written? What is going on?
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
So the nurse that was pacing, she comes over to me. She's like, are you Barbie? And I'm like, yeah, she's like, come with me. I'm thinking in my mind, she was just hanging out waiting for me, not realizing that I was in grave danger at the time. They get me in the room. They're like, give us a urine sample, change this gown. So I do that.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I sit on the bed and all of a sudden there's three or four nurses in the room. One's digging in my arm for an IV. One's trying to explain to me what they're doing. Another one's trying to place the catheter. I was put on magnesium and on magnesium, you're pretty much confined to your bed. They were like, do you want an epidural? I was like, no, I don't want an epidural.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And she's like, okay, I just need to understand like you're not going to be able to get up and move around or anything. We're starting to go on Pitocin. I was like, okay, still not fully understanding. The pitocin was kicking in. It was really pinching and cramping. It was not feeling great. I couldn't move. Couldn't do much in the bed other than turn. And I looked at my husband.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I was like, should I get the epidural? We're both like shell shocked. Neither of us know exactly what's going on. I had my husband call Amy to ask her if it was okay if I got an epidural. To ask permission. And that's just how, I don't know another word for it other than being just brainwashed. You can't make these decisions without the permission of your midwife or your doula.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I felt like getting an epidural was admitting defeat and failure. Amy was just like, oh my gosh, yes, she can do the epidural. You get in this mental state when you're in that environment of natural birth where it's like epidural is bad when it was a great needed intervention for me. My OB, she was the OB that Origins gave all their shit shows to. If things went south, they would call her.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
She's a wonderful doctor, very patient. She did not rush me to a C-section. And later I asked her why. And she said, because you and the baby were still okay. She let me labor. There was some turning off the Pitocin and turning on. And Sadie, my daughter, who I was in labor with, Sadie absorbed some of the magnesium. So her heart rate was going up and down. Amy did call.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
She was texting with my husband, checking on the status. I think she was actually staying at the birthing center. When I was pushing, she did show up to support and be there. When it was time to push, that's when things got scary. At this point, I had been in labor from Friday night to Sunday morning with little to no sleep. I pushed for an hour and a half. Sadie, they lost her heart rate.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
We're not going to be able to get pregnant naturally. IVF is the only option. For those that are familiar with IVF, it's not a cheap process, and it's not a guaranteed process. And this is five years ago, so there was not much insurance coverage at all for IVF. We were looking to spend between $20,000 and $30,000 to create a baby.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
They had to get Sadie out then. So she had to give me an episiotomy. Sadie popped out. I remember she held Sadie up. There was no crying. My baby was completely limp and covered in meconium. And so she gets Sadie out of there. She passes them off to the NICU and the NICU is working on her. She was five pounds, three ounces, the size of a 34 week old.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I have a video of her laying on the little baby bassinet. And she's completely flaccid. Normally, you know, a baby is very flexed and their arms are drawn up, their knees are drawn up. Her cry is not even a cry. It's a whimper. Her APGAR at one minute was a two. All she had for the first minute of her life was a heart rate. She wasn't breathing. Her skin color was not good.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
They had to use some respiratory resuscitation efforts to get her to start breathing and crying. At five minutes, her APGAR was a five. At five minutes of life, she had a little bit of skin color to her. Her muscle tone was really loose. She wasn't gripped up like a newborn normally is. She did recover at 10 minutes and she was a nine, thankfully.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Then all of a sudden, I just remember, I just hear this pouring sound. As if someone was pouring water on the floor. I'm like, what is that? I found out it was me. I was hemorrhaging because the placenta had abrupted from the wall. I delivered the placenta. I was just so curious. I was like, I want to see my placenta. Normally a placenta is the size of like a large dinner plate.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And mine was the size of a small pancake. So it just shows you like how damaged and how unhealthy that placenta was. And that's why Sadie was born so small and weak. The placenta was very sick. After I had Sadie, it was maybe like an hour after, like she was laying on my chest and Dr. Fuller said, your cheeks are really red. She told the nurse, can you take her temperature?
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I have it here in the nurse's note. It was 102.4. My temperature shot up real quick. She told the nurse to start whatever antibiotic. In the charting, it says I had chorioamnioitis. And so that's an infection of the placenta and the amniotic fluid. I ended up with HELP syndrome. HELP syndrome happens after preeclampsia. HELP syndrome stands for
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
hemolysis, which is breaking down of the red blood cells, elevated liver enzymes, and low platelet count. Your red blood cells start breaking down so your blood levels start to decrease. Your liver enzymes elevate and then your platelets plummet. They go way down. So then you're at risk for bleeding out. And it was a hard recovery. I ended up needing antibiotics and it was just rough.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
My OB came to me the next day. I was in the hospital. She sat on my bed and she grabbed my hand and she was like, I'm so glad you're here. And I'm so glad Sadie's here. And she said, that was one of the top three scariest delivers I've ever done. And she's been in a doctor for a very, very long time. She said, I had no clue that you had a prothrombin gene mutation.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
We found that out in June of 2018, and November of 2018, I found out from an acquaintance that IVF abroad was an option. We wouldn't have the financial burden of IVF. You know, we could pay cash. That's what we decided to do. So we traveled to Zlin, Czech Republic in February of 2019. We did a full round of IVF there. We stayed for three and a half weeks.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
She hadn't been taking care of me. She's like, it is a miracle. You didn't throw a clot on the table and for lack of better words, died. It's an utter miracle that you're both here and alive. There were signs in your lab work. Your liver enzymes were already elevated. Your blood pressure was creeping up already. And your weight was creeping up the weeks prior to this happening.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Like you should have already been sent out of their care. They shouldn't have kept you as long as they did. Also, something my OBGYN circled, origins was aware of my prothrombin gene mutation. And the prothrombin gene mutation I have can contribute to having a preeclampsia complication. On top of being an IVF patient, that puts you at higher risk of preeclampsia and other complications.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I also had a gene mutation that I didn't know puts you at a risk for preeclampsia. I don't see the medical knowledge background for them to be able to put those pieces together. Once I had her, I got home. We did a follow-up with the OB doctor. and then also with Origins because we had already paid for it, so we might as well do it.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I want to say they were supposed to have two follow-ups with Origins. And so the first follow-up was two days after she was born. And I saw Amy. It was just basically like, how are you feeling? What's your blood pressure? The second follow-up I was supposed to have with Origins, they had to push that one because someone was in labor at the birthing home at the time.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
My second follow-up was with this certified nurse midwife. which I had never met in my past. And Amy was there. Something felt off or uncomfortable. It just felt like Amy was avoiding me at that point. She was with another couple. But I was like, I almost died in front of you too. I just felt like she would have wanted to follow up with me, but she never did.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
The first year was really rough because she was born at 37 weeks. So technically about three weeks early. Four weeks later, she had an E. coli infection in her eyes that we had to get special eye drops for. She had like a very slight brachial strain. For the longest time, her right arm, she wouldn't use it. That probably happened when I was trying to push her out.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Her neck maybe went forward more than her shoulder and it caused a little bit of a strain, but that resolved on its own. She was always behind on her milestones and making those, but she has developed and she's a perfect little five-year-old now. I didn't understand the gravity of the situation until probably six months later. I really let myself think about what actually happened.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And then I started to get mad. Then I started putting all the pieces together. I called a lawyer's office that was recommended to me by a friend. She literally said, In the state of Texas, it's almost impossible to sue a provider. I didn't go and print my whole chart when they were shutting down because I was pregnant with my third baby. I just didn't think about it.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And so I called Dr. Fuller's office and I asked them to print all my records. And they told me, we will print everything we have for you. But Origins usually doesn't send everything. They kind of send what they want. And I was like, that tracks. I really wanted to see some of the charting and notes that Amy wrote.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
So when I went to pick up my records at Dr. Fuller's office, I was like, Hey, would Dr. Fuller mind requesting my records from origins? Because now that they're closed, they want a physician's request. And they were like, oh yeah, that's no problem. So right then and there, they had me sign a release form and they sent it over to origins.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
From the time I left Dallas to come home, which is like 30 minutes, they email me and they're like, Hey, here's all they sent us. It's six pages. None of it's helpful. It's where I used to live, how many weeks pregnant I was, and then the labs that they had collected while I was there. And that's it. There's no charting.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I'm just trying to see if there's anywhere on here that says like Amy Tate or... No, it's just like from Origins Birth Dallas with their old phone number on there. I was there from March of 2019, and then they transferred care October 11th of 2019.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
In my opinion, no later than 34 weeks. They should have said, Barbie, we can't do this. You have now gained over 10 or 12 pounds in a month. Your blood pressure just keeps going up. You're measuring 34 centimeters for three weeks now. Like something is wrong. But it's like no one put the pieces together. And I wasn't putting the pieces together clearly. according to the Cleveland Clinic.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Most preeclampsia, they said, start showing after 27 weeks pregnant. As a provider of any kind, you're trusted, and that is something very sacred. I feel like it wasn't taken seriously. I trusted her to tell me when it could not go any further. And I think what hurts the most is there was no apology. I know that none of us girls had got an apology.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I think we spent total was with meds, maybe $6,000. So that's a big cost difference. We transferred two embryos. Leading up to this, there was a ton of lab work that we had to do. And we found out I have a prothumbrin gene mutation, which is a very important factor in this story.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I know that would be admitting fault, but the hurt was not validated. It wasn't recognized. It's just been, well, it's your fault, but look, you're alive. So peace out kind of thing.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Yes, I agree. Amy has not reached out to me. I feel blatantly ignored or not advocated for in my care with Origins. That's kind of what led to me leaving my review. I left one on Google. I left one on Yelp. And I was very careful to only put the facts. I posted it. And then shortly after, on April 28th, Amy emailed me. And she said, I read your review. Certainly sorry.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
You feel like you were not cared for well. As for the prothrombin gene mutation, it does increase, but does not guarantee the issues you mentioned. We discussed it at length and you stayed on baby aspirin. We never had a full discussion about it. I remember they even suggested maybe you should stop taking the baby aspirin. I was like, I feel like I should stay on it.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
She said, I looked over your chart as I remembered some things differently. We drew labs at 37.1 weeks before your episode at work because I was concerned. You were taking your blood pressure at home and self-reporting much different numbers to us, and you insisted it was White Coat Syndrome, as reported to us at the 14-week intake.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
But you did spill protein, so I felt uncomfortable and recommended multiple things as well as a CMP, which you consented to. complete metabolic profile. The most important thing for preeclampsia out of that profile is the liver enzymes. She said, we did additional labs when you came in the following day. And the moment I got the results, I called Dr. Fuller to arrange immediate care.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And then I called you to go directly to Baylor. And then she says, your charts are completely available. We love caring for you. And the fear you mentioned was likely more our hearts breaking for you to have another load during such a hard time. The gaslighting, the manipulation, like she's saying, To us, you insisted that your blood pressure was due to white coat syndrome, which I did.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
But you as a provider should have balls to go against me and say, hey, based off of our professional knowledge and our experience, because we do this every day, this is what we're concerned about.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I did not. Because at that point, that email to me felt a little aggressive. Like, if you love me that much, call me. and tell me this, but she's, you know, basically justifying the decisions they made, why they did what they did and why ended up in the situation I ended up in.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I posted that review in 2020 and never thought anything would ever come of it and dreamed of the day that I would be on a podcast telling my story just to have my voice heard because damn, that was traumatic. So Kristen reached out to me November of 2023 on Facebook messenger and She found me through my review. She was basically like, I'm Kristen. This is what happened to me.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I've created this survivors of origins birth center support. Just looking for community. If you want to connect, we're all kind of trauma bonded in a way.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I listened to it while I was working night shift the other night. I cannot believe a traumatic story has happened more than once in a birthing center. It shouldn't be this traumatic that often. After listening and hearing about the owners, I personally never met them, I don't know.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
But based off of the pattern of what I've heard, I now wonder if Amy's decision to not send me was more encouraged because they wanted to handle it themselves. It seems like that's fitting to the actions that were taken. I want to say in one of the other interviews, you asked somebody, did the people at Baylor seem to know this was a thing about origins? And I want to say, yes.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
When I first delivered Sadie and I transferred from origins to there, no one said anything to me. But I had two more kids at Baylor and each time I ended up delivering early and jokingly to the nurses and like triage, I would say, oh, I was an origin shit show. And they would look at me and they say, it happens all the time. They were insinuating. They get origins cases all the time.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And I was like, dang, that should not be how it is. People are able to become midwives and start interpreting medical values that can be life or death with no medical background. There needs to be some kind of standardized schooling that midwives go through because I think midwives are great. I know several people that have used them, but I also know that not every midwife is created equal.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Whereas as a nurse, you have to go to college for four years and you also have to do so many hours of clinical. And then you also have to pass a licensing exam. You get the experience in the hospital. I just think we deserve better.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
My whole reason for wanting to do this, A, is to be heard because I felt so silenced. But the second part, I want people to know every person is not the same. And I don't know how else to say it, but everybody's not going to present in their pregnancies the same way because that's one thing that I felt like they kept using against me. What I really hope
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
people will take away from this is not all birthing centers are bad. Not all midwives are bad for lack of better words, but to really, really, really, really do your research. And please don't make a decision based off of really nice pictures and the materialistic part of the experience. I just want to say, Not all OBs are bad either. The hospital medical field gets a bad rap.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Both have so many pros and cons. You just have to do your research. If you feel like something is wrong, then something probably is.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
They told me, oh, you have this clotting disorder. You'll probably be on aspirin your whole life. Once we transferred those two embryos, we took a plane back to Texas. At the time, I was with an OB in Plano, Texas. We were drawing the HCG labs with her. My HCG was tripling like an HCG that you're pregnant with twins. So from what we could tell, both embryos took.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Already this pregnancy felt delicate and special. And on top of that, my mom was in stage four colon cancer and she was not doing well. You know, it's my first baby. My mom's actively dying. Like there's a lot of life changing events that are in the mix that are happening. Here's where fate started turning.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I was working one day and at the time at the hospital, there was a ton of nurses that were pregnant. And one of my friends, she's a nurse practitioner was pregnant. She was a few months ahead of me, and so she was taking these birthing prep classes. We were talking about it one day at work, and she was like, the instructor was talking about this place called Origins. It sounds so cool.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
It's a birthing center that's right down the street from Baylor University Medical Center. Immediately, I thought, oh, that's awesome. You get the natural birth, but if something goes wrong, you can walk down to the hospital, basically. I wasn't super settled on the OB I had. Google origins, birth and wellness. And the website was beautiful. It's like the anthropology of birthing centers.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I thought I could have this magical, peaceful birth. One thing I looked at when I first started looking into them was what was their transfer rates? Well, their transfer rates were super low. So I thought, oh, that's great. In the midst of all of the stuff that's happening with me at home in my personal life, I could have an amazing birth. And this place would be perfect to do that at.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
They had a night where it's like an open house or welcome to the new pregnant people. Ask me all your questions type of get together. We went to that. We saw the birth center in person. My husband's like, this is what you want. Let's do it. Yes, this is what I want. My whole life, all I've known is all natural. I'm third born of eight kids.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
My mom birthed my oldest brother at home and then she birthed me at home. And that's when she hemorrhaged, was rushed to the emergency room. She survived that. And then she had six more kids. The rest of the kids were in the hospital. This is back in the nineties. We didn't have to have medical insurance and we couldn't afford it. So my mom did a lot of herbal remedies and natural things.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And so I just grew up in the natural world. People say like, you're a nurse. Why did you even go this route? You get pregnant. You want the very best for your baby, for your body. I feel like This is what's right. I signed up with Origins for the birthing boot camp. I remember giving them all the medical records.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
The first thing they should have done when they saw my medical records, I didn't know this at the time. They should have said, I am so sorry. We can't take you because you're high risk because A, you're an IVF patient and B, you have a clotting disorder that we are not comfortable managing. Those two things right there, she should have said, we can't do it.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
There's too many factors that could go wrong all of a sudden.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
That is not something that crossed my mind at the time, no. They're freaking helping you birth your child. It wasn't something that they say, hi, thanks for coming to Origins. Now I want you to understand the difference in licensing.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I primarily saw Amy. There was another midwife that worked there. I would see either of them, but primarily I saw Amy every appointment. And when I was at Origins, they were the only two. It wasn't a midwife mill. There wasn't a different one every single time. There was a receptionist. She was the one that would do billing and answering the phone and things like that.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
There was a total probably three to four people in the facility.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
No, I never met them. I never talked with them. I knew that Origins had a facility out in Fort Worth. I Googled it at one point. I think I saw those two ladies on the website, but I never talked with them.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Amy was very kind. I do want to make this note. I think that Amy is at her core is a very nice person. And I think she has good intentions, but I feel like something clouds her judgment because she doesn't want her reputation to be messed up. And so she'll take on some cases she probably shouldn't take on. The first half of my pregnancy, it was fine because it felt very typical.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
It felt like I was having a smooth sailing pregnancy. When I first started with them, she said due to IVF, that they'll get me over to the MFM or the maternal fetal medicine doctor to do an ultrasound to double check things just to make sure everything's good. And I never saw an MFM. That never actually came to fruition. Here's how an appointment went.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
You would go to the bathroom, you'd give a urine sample, you would get the dipstick, and you would dip that in your urine yourself. And then you would weigh yourself. You'd wait for the midwife. They'd come in to be like, I looked at your urine and everything looks fine. And what was your weight today? So you would tell them.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I hated that having to report your weight to somebody that's like, you look at it. I don't want to see it because at one point in my pregnancy, I started gaining six to seven pounds a week. And I didn't know that about preeclampsia, but that was a lot of weight gain in one week. And they would, for lack of better words, fat shame me and be like, what are you eating during the week?
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Are you exercising? But here's an interesting fact. And maybe this is what's normal. My entire pregnancy, when I started at Origins until the time I was in the hospital delivering, no one had seen my vagina. Like no one had been down there.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Nothing. When they do the group B strep swab, you do it yourself, which I thought was kind of odd. I told you we transferred two embryos. We lost that second embryo at seven or eight weeks, very early on. My mom passed away when I was about six months pregnant from colon cancer. I had alongside my dad and siblings had been one of her caretakers. That was a really hard hit to our family.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
First baby, I wanted my mom to meet her. After that, I'm about six months going on seven months. This is when my blood pressure starts creeping up in office. I have a history of anxiety and depression, and I always would blame things on my anxiety. In office, my blood pressure was reading 140s over, I don't know what the bottom number was, but the bottom number was up a little bit too.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
They said, oh, that's a little high. And I was like, well, you know, I have anxiety and I probably just have white coat syndrome. White coat syndrome, you're scared of providers, you're scared of doctor's offices. That's my understanding that Your blood pressure might be up. Your heart rate might be up. Your vitals might read a little higher than usual. So I'd always brush it off.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I want to drive the point home. I just watched my mom die. I was hell bent on, I'm going to have a peaceful, wonderful birth. I'm not in the mood for something else to go wrong. Two weeks later, I come back in for my appointment and my weight starts really creeping up. Six, seven, eight pounds a week. I'm trying to give them reason of why I'm gaining weight.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
And I'm like, well, you know, my mom just died. Maybe I had too much ice cream. I don't know. And I've been going through this and it's just stressful. I didn't even know what preeclampsia was. I know I'm a nurse, but I don't do preeclampsia with children. I didn't know that that was a complication.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
Origins wrote on August 22nd, 2019, which I have my calendar pulled up, was a Thursday to September 5th of 2019, which is two weeks later. I gained eight pounds in two weeks. And according to the preeclampsia.org website, it says weight gain of more than three to five pounds in a week may be an indicator of preeclampsia. So already, I was having the weight gain, almost 10 pounds in two weeks.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I feel like someone should have sat down and said, hey, you've got weight gain. You've had some headaches. And your blood pressure... in office isn't that great. Maybe we should get something checked. No. What we did instead was, as the pregnancy progressed, it was send us what your blood pressure numbers are reading at home. At night, I would make sure that I was as relaxed as possible.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I would take my blood pressure and just pray it was a number that no one would get scared at. Most of the time, my blood pressure at home, it was 130s over 80s. And they were okay with that. And I was okay with it too, because I didn't want anything to be wrong. They tell me, you should really take some cayenne pills and you need to drink celery water.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I don't know if you've ever tasted celery water. It tastes like ass. But I was drinking that celery water like my life depended on it. My blood pressure at 34 weeks was creeping up. So it's 128 over 91. The top number wasn't horribly scary, but the bottom number is in the 90s. And then also at 34 weeks, they correlate the fundal height to the week pregnant.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
So at 34 weeks, I was 34 centimeters at the fundal height. I come back in the next week at 35 weeks, I'm measuring 34 weeks. I said, is that okay? And she said, yeah, it can vary, you know, one or two. And I'm like, okay. I come in at 36 weeks. My blood pressure is 137 over 92. So it's going up even further. And I'm still measuring 34 centimeters in the fundal height two weeks later.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
So that's showing you like there's been no uterine growth. If you're not going to do a sonogram, the next best thing you have is the fundal height. Sadie had not been growing in utero. I didn't know that was something to look for. So that's at 36 weeks. And then at 37 weeks, October 8th, I went in for an appointment. My blood pressure was 148 over 98 and my fundal height was 35 centimeters.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I was 37 weeks pregnant and she's measuring two weeks behind. Just to give context, I was 183 pounds. I'm 5'10 when I got pregnant. Now, Origins wrote that the last weight they recorded for me on the 8th of October is 240 pounds. I delivered my daughter on October 13th at 250 pounds. We can do the math real quick. I had a total weight gain of 67 pounds. I was just eating a normal diet.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I was having like speckles in my vision. I wasn't losing vision. I did not have a massive migraine or anything like some people with preeclampsia do, but I did report. I have some speckles and like a dull headache, but I take Tylenol for it and it's okay. That's what I would tell them. Also at that appointment on that Tuesday, they drew blood work. I don't know when they got this blood work back,
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
But it's important to note at my appointment, she told me you did spill a little bit of protein in your urine on your dipstick the other day. I remember her saying that. I was like, wait, what? I already had protein in my urine. There was already signs of preeclampsia six days before Sadie was born and four days before I went to the hospital.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
With preeclampsia, your organs are starting to, I don't know if the words deteriorate, fail, but my organs were not working at max capacity anymore. So I was just running around with these high values and high blood pressure. The next day on Wednesday, October 9th, I was at work, didn't feel well. I was having speckles in my vision. My head hurt. I just felt sick.
Something Was Wrong
S23 E13: Origins Shit Show
I looked at one of my nurse friends and I said, I think I need to take my blood pressure. She took it and immediately all the color leaves her face. She turns the machine to me and it's reading 210 over 117. And that's very, very, very high. Like we're stroke levels at this point. I'm going, hell no, there is no way this is happening to me.