B. Simone

No, no, no.

For real, for real, for real. Wait, so you celibacy?

Thank you.

I'm so proud. Is the goal until marriage?

Y'all need to get married next week.

One for the roll. I'm on full charge. I don't want to waste it.

I'm done.

She's like, I mean, she never tells me anything. I'm just saying. I'm like, B, what do you be doing? She's like, girl, she be showing me how to dance and stuff. I'm like, you do not be doing that.

Yeah, send it to your man right now.

Can we have Crystal's phone? And you got to say it in that voice. I had a dream about you last night. No, because you were trying to be celibate. I'm sorry. Look at the devil.

I'm sorry.

Yesterday.

Okay, so I'm ready already because I'm really excited about this one. So I'm going to hand you my phone. It's already on my DMs. This says, let the group pick someone for you to send a flirty DM to. Pick. Go. It's like pick a celebrity. Hold on now. No! Who did you say? I'm not going to tell you. You said choose the phone. Okay, say it. No, you've got to say it out loud.

Let me see it before you tell her. Who is it? I want it to be somebody new and fresh.

It gotta be somebody I don't know.

Like somebody I'm trying to bag. Somebody new. Javonna XL.

What is she saying?

I knew it.

Look, this is beautiful. Y'all vanish mode. Oh my God. I'm like Cindy.

Come on, take us now.

That's the goal.

I know that's right. So I'm doing good. It's only March. Ask me in June. Yeah. To answer your question, first of all, your edges are beautiful.

They are so thick. I'm over here like, okay, let me brush mine down. A little thinning. I was just talking about this with one of my best friends, Shekinah, in the back, just saying, she was like, how do you feel? I was like, I feel so good. And I was, the lady was touching us up in the back, the makeup lady. I'm sorry, I don't know her name. Tiffany. Yes, yes, she was great.

And I was like, I'm about to cry because I remember sitting in makeup chairs crying because I didn't feel good and I had to go to work. And I'm about to cry now because I feel good and I'm in this makeup chair and I have to go to work. I said all that to say, this week, man, I've been honed in. And she kind of was like, what do you think it is? I'm like, I don't know, because I've done everything.

I got a chef and changed my diet. I was in the sauna four times a week. I've been doing two a day. So that just goes to tell you and show you all of it matters. All of it matters, from your health to your wellness to your mindset to your reading to everything. I had church today. I went to two services. I'm like, all right, man. Come on. So all of it matters. I feel good.

She kind of was like, what's the mission when you go out there? I was like, to exude joy. So I hope y'all feel this joy. And I'm just so glad to be on a stage where I feel good. But all of it matters. You can't just focus on one area of your life and neglect the other. You got to go to the gym. You got to walk. You got to watch what you eat.

It's all the things that add to your joy, your wellness, and your peace.

Oh, at this point. Oh, I can't wait to say, oh, this is how me and my husband balance. Work life and entrepreneur life with my man, my man. I can't wait. It's coming. Thank you, Lord.

Every morning, I'd be like, ooh, okay. Yeah, you know, I just figure it out. Balancing. This came up in therapy. Well, it wasn't really a therapy session. It was a podcast episode with Thema Bryant. Yes, yes. Dr. Bryant was on my podcast, and she was like, you have to realize that when you go through bad things, we're like, it's not that bad. We all probably do that. Like, it's not that bad.

It's not that bad. It's not that bad. because you've been through worse. No, it's not that bad, it's still bad. Don't diminish the things you're going, it's not that bad. It's just a little, just lost another friend. No, that's bad. Another betrayal, that's bad. Another jealous spirit, that's bad. Another, oh, he just cheated on, it's not that, no, that's bad.

Don't diminish what you're going through. So I think to balance it all, you have to address it. You know, you have to address it. You have to address the postpartum, like Jazz said. You have to address, I'm not okay. You have to address, the only way to fix something is to be honest. You can't brush it under the rug. I need a minute. Yeah, I want to strangle my friend or my boyfriend or my baby.

Yeah.

That's real. No, that's real. Intrusive thoughts. I'm just saying.

Address it so you can fix it. Don't bury it. And then now it's a snowball effect and you blow up and really do it.

It's true.

Talk to somebody. So the only way to get through is to start walking through it and address it.

So we don't know what we would negotiate with after marriage and kids and family. But in the dating phase, what is a hard non-negotiable for you? Like if this happens, no matter what, we have nothing to talk about.

Like, where are we going? Oh, no, come on. Come back and get me when you know. Hello, because there's an issue. Where are we going? I'm in a field. Itchy.

Come on, stop playing with me. Come back and get me when you know where we going.

I think faith for sure. I'm not willing to compromise on religious beliefs.

Yeah.

I remember you talking about that. And I have different religious backgrounds in my family. We all be in the group chat. It's just hilarious in the group chat. It's like, all right, y'all, God bless. Yes, all praise is due to Allah. I'm like, Jesus Christ is king. No, what? And then my other cousin, well, the universe. I'm like, we all on different pages in this group chat, but whatever.

But I'm not willing to compromise on that with a romantic partner. Because long term, you want to get married, you want to have children, and you want to ultimately Like you said, trust. If I truly believe that Jesus is the way, the truth, and the life, and you don't believe that, if I truly believe it, I just believe you're deceived.

So I can't be with somebody who I feel is deceived.

You know, and just following a road of deception. That and for me in the dating phase, I dealt with this with my ex. God rest his soul. Chris, I love you so much. He passed away. Yes. non-negotiable was cheating. And I talked about it publicly. I'm like, if you, I don't know what I would do if I was married 10 years with three kids. And I don't know.

I don't know if that's something we could talk about, but in boyfriend and girlfriend early on, No, that's a hard non-negotiable for me. If it happens, we have nothing to discuss. I will walk away.

You made yourself comfortable. I had to. I know y'all keep it classy and keep it positive, sweetie. But I had to bring the Be Simone energy. And I took the cover, took my shoes off, and I'm here, sis.

So you know what it is for me? I think whatever we agree to. So if you clearly tell me. Oh, yeah. we're dating, we're in this together, I'm not seeing other people, I'm trusting your word. It's more of a word thing. Like, if I can't trust you now, why am I gonna be able to all of a sudden turn the trust switch on when we walk down the aisle? So I think whatever we agree to is what I expect.

If you're like, we're dating other people or whatever, yeah. So for me, if we agree it's just us, then it's gonna have to be that. It gotta be that, yeah.

I think I would if I could still I wouldn't want to 100% change my lifestyle. Like, oh, OK, I can't get facials anymore, or I can't do all these things because we can't afford it, right? So as long as we can have the same lifestyle, I would love to still travel and live and invest in businesses. And when you invest, you know you're going to lose sometimes. Do we have the money to take those risks?

I done invested in properties and certain tech things that was like, oh, that didn't really work out, but I invest over here. He could make less than me for sure, but I would love to keep up the same lifestyle if that makes sense.

Thank you for having me.

What you got going on?

Crystal don't play. She be on a vineyard drinking wine, eating cheese. I'm like, Crystal, where you at? In Paris with the president and the queen. I'm like, well, call me back. I'm in Atlanta. Call me when you get back, girl.

Bring me some cheese.

Do you see this production? Do you see the quality? The quality. It is so beautiful.

When you're exposed, it's like, I can't go back.

Steve Harvey said that once you sit in first class, I don't want to go back to the row 20 in the middle seat. I want that space. I want to relax. I want to work up there. You can work more. It's more productive. And you get to sit like in your feminine and relax and enjoy the moment and enjoy all the things that life has for you without worrying about. Can I afford this?

The stresses that come with this.

You hear these things because we've all, well, not we've all, but me and you, let's speak for me and you because we've talked about finances, hitting a certain tax bracket and a certain amount. This is new in our walk.

With being a celebrity or being financially stable and, you know, making this amount of money and having to budget it and having accountants and people look over your stuff. And I, for the first time, I wasn't even like this when I was broke. Girl, I would have like $50. I'd be like, this $50 for the week. We going out. Periodic. I'm going to live my life. It's going to come back.

I'm going to make it next week. I've never been like fickle or like holding on to money because I always believe it's going to come back. But I show my million dollar journey on YouTube back in 2020. That was the year I made my first million. I wanted to be like, okay, by the time I'm 30, I want to see it in my account. I want to see it liquid, right?

Like it's not assets. It's not a car. It's not like it's in the account, right? That was in 2020. After that, it took me 30 years to make my first million, 30 days to make my second. So within 30 days after my birthday, I was a multimillionaire.

Quick. Yes. Baby, them zeros ain't in that account no more.

And it's easier to spend, too. Idiot. You see them zeros, you're like, get the jet. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on. Dinner on me. You want to fly to Jamaica? That would be the summer.

one of these ballers shot callers baby let me i'm transparent again them zeros ain't in that account no more that liquid ain't there no more now do i have i did buy my first home yeah it's an asset i have invested in my businesses i'm launching uh the ltta app yes which is exclusive this is the first time i've ever said that So I'm investing, right?

So I still have, you know, I'm still technically a millionaire, but with assets, right? But when you start spending, you realize how quick it can go.

I'm excited. Y'all been trying to get me on here. I'm here. They're like, she done been to LTTA three times, two times. I'm like, okay now. You gotta invite me. Yeah. She invited me and I'm here.

Nothing.

It's nothing. When you constantly are reinvesting. What? Them taxes. I said, oh, I owe y'all this much?

But you remember when we used to get refund checks? Yes.

So, yeah, to answer your question, for the first time, I'm in a season where I'm being more diligent with my money. Yeah. I look back on all that. people I gave money to that didn't do nothing with it. They still in the same position. Just so many things, being Santa Claus and being like... Do you think you're a people pleaser?

You're better now? Okay. You know what? I'm not a people pleaser. I'm a recovering people pleaser. I am recovering. I'm in AA. Okay, so I am recovering. I'm getting so much better at saying no, and I'm asking God first before I do things. Smart.

You didn't ask if you were supposed to buy that person a house. You're like, I got it, I got it. What you need? Yeah, no. What? I got to tell you a story. I've never shared this publicly. I was downtown and we were filming Wildin' Out. Yes. Downtown in Atlanta. I see a lady, she's changing her baby's diaper on the ground. She got five kids with her, right? And I'm staying in this hotel.

We end up talking, going, going. Long story short, I put her and her kids in this hotel for the week. Just, you know, put them in the hotel, boom, boom, boom. Me, y'all, this is crazy. This don't make no sense. And I'm not advising anybody to do this. A month later, you think I didn't have that lady at house?

But it wasn't wise. It wasn't wise.

Not even the space I was in. She couldn't keep it up. She was stressed. I walked in the house. It was flies and gnats and food. Oh, I just came in the house and I started crying. You know, but we worked our way up to that. You know, I had a realtor help me and I talked to her and I tried to get her housing and I tried to get her a job. Wow. We were working our way up to it.

You're so cute. Thank you.

I just didn't buy a stranger a house. And it was an investment property. So I was like, if anything, I could sell it and it's still an investment for me, right? But I said all that to say, I didn't pray about that. I just saw somebody in need. It was off impulse. Like, you can't be on the street with your five kids. You know, so I built a relationship with her. But she...

It don't matter what you do for people if their mind doesn't change. She still thought she was on the street even though she was in a house.

It's more than just putting her in a house. It's giving her the resources to keep it up, the resources to pay the rent, the resources to mentally grow. So she was in the house, but her mind was still in the streets. Helping people that God calls you to and the way he calls you to do it, not just impulsively giving. So I'm learning that in this season with my businesses, too.

You know, I'm getting better. I'll be looking over everything. I'm like, yes, back in the days. Oh, that's five grand. Oh, give it. No. Okay, break it down what I'm paying for. Why is it five grand? Well, this person is three grand. Why are you five? Let's break it down and talk about it before I just swipe my card.

I already know. Day rates, booking.

They're going to send you that invoice. Oh, they're going to send me that? An invoice is going to come. You'd be like, what am I paying for?

And see where you can cut back. I've been cooking more. I'm like, my accountant hit me. He said, you spent $20,000 on food in a month. I believe it. Uber eating three times a day. Bam. Not getting up. Is that Amy? I said, no, no. I said, you're looking, you talking about the year? No, the month. He said, he called me. It can be like $200, $300 a day. And then you go out to eat.

You're picking up the tab for everybody. So it adds.

And then you look up.

And you know, you want to do it. You want to take care of your people.

I got it because I want to go there. Yeah. So if I got to go to town alone, I'm going to go sit alone and wait for my man to come. I'm going to sit and have a date by myself and just, I'm going to say table for two. He coming? So yeah, 20 grand in a month on food. I said, what am I eating?

And I like to eat now. I do too. So I order six things just to bite.

I just want to bite everything. No, literally. Remember we talked about that after church when we went out to eat? We went out to eat on Easter and she was like, you want this? I was like, I want to try all of it. She's like, me too.

I was, oh, the first word, it's two words, resilience. Obviously, that's what I'm about in this season. Like the LTTA, I'm like, try this again, never give up, press forward, resilience. But I was going to say progress. Yes. I feel like I've made progress like with my career, with starting over, with my relationship with God, with boundaries.

That's not including the post-workout bar. three literally you spending 300 500 a day on food i love it though see that's why i need a man that can keep up because i gotta eat i'm not cutting that out listen uh queen latifah on just right she goes now ain't no salad either me neither i want all the food i want to taste everything so yeah Yeah, I've been, but I have been cooking more.

And I'm like, you know, this is nice. I actually feel lighter because you know what's going in your food. I feel healthier. I can eat a lot of carbs at home. And I'm like, this is, you know, it's just cooked in. So cutting back on where I can. I've been getting my nails done less. I'm like, okay, if I get pink at the bottom when they grow out, you ain't gonna be able to tell.

I can last a couple more weeks. I'm doing good. I like that. I'm getting longer hairstyles, so this hairstyle gonna last me, what's the, after New Year's, shit. Now you're pushing it. I'm like, shut up. I'm going to wash my braids. This got to last. You know, the braids is $800 hairstyle for the girl to come for $12. So if you're spending the money, take care of it.

And I used to be, you know, purses on the floor. Why are you buying the Louis bag?

Like literally, I was like, literally like, oh, we're in New York. Let's go shopping. Yeah. I'm going to spend $20,000.

And then you don't want to be, you know, for me. You don't want to do it in front of people. You don't want to feel like I'm, you know, so yeah, grab something. Or here, I got this for you.

But then you look up, all them niggas gone.

And my account is low and I'm sitting here with this Louis bag and no friends. So we ain't doing that no more.

These Steve Madden earrings right here, looking like Balenciaga, baby. I done spent $500 on Steve Madden and got the whole store.

They got clothes now.

Sponsor. Yes, please.

I just feel like I'm in such a new space and I'm such a different person than I was before. six months ago, a year ago, a few years ago, a couple months ago. So I feel like I'm making progress. I'm even back in the gym. Like, girl, because I tell the truth now. I was on that. Oh, that was on that zimp. That's my girl. Y'all know me. I was on that zimp. Please, I got to lose weight. Take this shot.

For me, I can only say what makes me a good friend by what I've been told. I can't say I'm a good friend. I need my friends. I'm a great friend. Are your friends saying that? Yeah. You can't say you're not a friend. You know what I mean? Are you?

Are you? Yeah. So just, I think from what I've been told, like showing up for people, I just, I really support my people. Like I'm like, it's inspiring to me. Like the Veenas, you, Desi. Like I look at y'all, like when Veena had her show, her one woman show, I'm like, this is lit, bro. I want to produce this for you. Like, I would love to produce. I would love to help. I would love to.

I was on the soundboard. Like, this is lit. How can I help? So I'm very supportive. You are. Oh, my God, you are. It inspires me. When I walked in here, I was like, yo. This is inspiring. What are we doing next at LTTA? It's not a competition thing. It's an inspiring thing. The way you carry yourself, the way you show up, the way you're so graceful, but you're very assertive.

I'm like, I got to work on that. You can't let people walk all over. It's inspiring. So I love supporting my friends. I love... making them feel loved. I think I'm a great friend. I do. I think I'm loyal. Baby, you could tell me you dated this nigga in second grade. I will block him. Ain't got nothing to do with me. You introducing me to your nigga, I'm like, hey, I'm looking on the floor.

That's all I need. Hello, bye. I don't need to be in no nigga face. I don't, all that. People be diddly-widdly. You can't trust these girls, you know? So I treat friendship the way I would want somebody to treat me. Just show up, you know? And in this season, friendship has changed for me. I don't think I ever required a lot from my friends. Wow. What does being required now?

Oh my God, I need to know you for me. I need to know you're for me by your actions, by the safe space you create for me. I'm willing to go through the trenches with my friend, but I'm willing to walk with them. I'm not willing to drag them out the dark. So if you got that dark cloud over you, if you're in the darkness, if you got that victim mindset, if you...

I'll come check on you, but I'm gonna keep walking. I'm not sitting in the dark with you. And I did that a lot in my past and it put the dark cloud on me. And now I got anxiety and now I'm nervous and now my stomach hurting and now I'm walking in rooms. I can't be my full authentic self because whatever was on you, now it's on me. So I'm no longer willing to do that.

I'll help you and walk with you, but I'm not going to drag you. That's good.

So what I require is just loyalty, conversations. If something bothers you, let's talk about it. You know, we got to have those conversations and friendship, too. So that's so good. Yeah. You know, it's like you blowing up. You never told me. Yeah. I didn't know. I didn't know it was important to you that I showed up for this.

this soccer practice or whatever it is, like whatever is a big deal, you never told me. So, you know, you have to treat each friend different because each friend requires different things.

So I truly believe I'm a great friend. I've gotten no

complaints and anytime and I talked about this on the craze podcast he was like how do you take accountability I'm like I'm such a people pleaser that accountability is easy for me because when people tell me there's a problem I'm like how do I fix it yes I never like I did that I'm like I'm so sorry yeah it's almost over accountable and I don't sit back and say well hold on I didn't do that.

All these diabetics need this medicine. I got it.

Or, you know, or hold on, let's talk about this. So accountability is pretty easy for me. But as far as friendships, I feel like I'm a great friend. You are. Thank you, friend. You are, too. I love you. You are, too. You just show up and show up. She's like, you want to go to the Hawks game? Yeah, stop playing. We're back in season, so we got to go. Right, right.

And I still got to come to this house. Yes. We be so busy, but we're going to make it happen. We're going to make it happen.

But yeah, I feel like I'm a great friend and I'm super open to constructive criticism, whether it's in my relationship. And I'm sure let's let's not let's be real. I'm human. I'm sure there's been moments where I might have gotten offended or might have been like, not taking accountability, but for the most part, overall, I feel like I'm pretty easy to talk to. I fix it. I'm like, let's fix it.

Like I want to show up in the way you need me to show up. So I'm open to constructive criticism, even in friendships.

I was on Ozempic for like a year and I lost 45 pounds, girl, but it messed up my gut health. Yeah, I talk about that, like the back end of it is like it's not healthy long term, you know, so I don't recommend it. But I was on it and I wasn't like training, training super heavily on it because I was always nauseous and sick and I didn't really need to because I was I was looking good.

And people need different stuff in different seasons. Maybe like I have a friend who went through a divorce before her divorce. She didn't need as much as she needs now.

she's in a season of like i need my friend i need my sister i'm trying to figure this out i'm like you know there's different when you go through a horrible friend breakup i'm like in this season i need loyalty yeah i need to know you my friend yes i didn't require as much at the beginning but once you go through stuff you need certain things in certain seasons so just being vocal with that i love that yeah i love that

I just texted my sister yesterday. Wow. This is crazy. You brought this up. Hold on. Hold on. Hold on. Where my sister, but not yesterday, today. Um, I was with my family yesterday. And sometimes I feel like we run from family because family is a trigger for our past. So certain things trigger us. Like we could choose our friends. You can't choose your family. But you always with your friends.

Well, I chose them. I didn't choose y'all. And sometimes there's triggers over here with family. But my sister was like, it's so good. You're around the family more. And they were so happy you were there. I went to Columbus. And my dad grew up there. And we were there. And I had a show. And my uncle, my aunt, my dad's siblings, we were all together. We went to eat.

And it was just a beautiful family moment, something that I'm appreciating the older I get and the more healing I do.

So I was like, the more I heal, the less family is a trigger. It used to trigger me being around family sometimes, but that just comes from unhealed wounds. I'm glad I could bring everybody together. I'm working through healing. Therapy has helped me so much, even so-and-so. I'm not gonna say their name publicly. I'm not letting anybody control my emotions anymore.

I forgive her and one day I'm gonna sit down and talk to her and let her know she hurt me, but I'm gonna let her know I forgive her. I'm moving on with life, excuse me, and I'm going to be happy. No one in this world will control how I feel. So the more you heal and you're like, I just want to be happy. I don't want to hold this. It doesn't feel good.

You address it and you find the proper steps and tools to move through it and move forward. You don't have to forget, but it's no more anger. You got to let it go. And you've got to find the tools that help you do that. Therapy, honesty, being real. Like, yes, I was angry. Yes, I was jealous. Yes, I was envious. Yes, I was bitter. Yes, this upset me.

Addressing those emotions, being honest so you can move through them and not hold on to them.

One of the best books. Have you read The Untethered Soul? Yes.

It shows you how to just let go. Be in the moment. If we were really just in this moment, we would have no issues. Because I'm just sitting here with you. I'm not thinking about what I'm going to eat later. I'm not thinking about where I got to go. I'm not thinking about my nap. I'm not thinking about I'm tired. I'm not thinking. I'm just here with Crystal. Be where your feet are. Be in the moment.

But now I'm back in the gym.

And when you do that, you can forgive and let go.

Man.

So I'm doing it, trying to be healthy, doing it the healthy way and not like, you know, supplements and all the things, just taking my protein, weight training and doing cardio. I'm back running. So I feel like I've made progress. The word is progress. I love it. I love it.

A recent situation, about a year, year and a half ago, I probably went from an F to to now, a year and a half later, I'm at like a C, a B. Because you'd be like, why would you do that? How could you be so stupid? You allowed that person to do that. You beat yourself up on what you allowed, but you only did what you knew. You can only do with the tools and the wisdom you have in that season.

I thought I was being the best version of myself that I could be then. So with forgiving myself, I'm much better now. But I have been hard on myself. And then you got to stop. You got to be like, you're bullying yourself. Like you're being a bully. You're being a bully to you. You wouldn't say this to anybody else. That was dumb.

I would never say that to you if you told me, even if it was a dumb decision.

I would be like, why'd you do that? It's okay though. I would comfort you and I would let you know it's going to be okay. So I think we need to extend the same grace to ourselves.

So I'm better with forgiving myself. I love that. I love that. But yeah, I just love our talks.

Don't kick me off the couch. I would never.

What? We be at the house key kin.

On the phone key kin. You're like, girl. I can't even tell you how much you be texting me. What I be saying? Let me know when y'all.

See, we're not secrecy. We're private. Yeah. We ain't telling y'all everything. Yeah. Keep it cute.

Sweetie.

I love you more.

I am so proud of you, bro.

I'm so proud of this. I can, I see it. I'm like literally seeing it. You're going to be on, this is going to be a show. TV, like daytime talk. I see it. Red carpets, everything. Everything you've been manifesting, it's going to happen. It's coming. You're already in it. You just got to keep walking towards it. Keep walking towards it. It's already there.

Cause it's like, it's all coming together and all the losses you took, even the people that the opportunities, whatever doors were shut, you realize why God allowed it to happen for this very moment. And I just have one request. I just want to ask you one thing. Yes. When you get married, please let me be the flower girl. Crystal. I just want to,

for them to see us on there. But the LTTA app, just community for women where we share, I'm producing shows for the app, extra content, daily motivation, daily devotionals, daily affirmations, journaling, just a whole healing mentally, spiritually, physically. We even got workouts on there.

So app for women, you can go to letstrythisagain.com, put in your email and sign up for the newsletter. I love it. Thank you.

Y'all check her out.

Like somebody finding out I'm fake or phony or a lie. Like that is like a fear. Like, no, this is me. I am real. This is what comes with it.

Why do you think that is?

What got you to the point where you were like, you know would be I'm about to just put it all out there I've always been like that but I think subconsciously it was also a protection because Nobody can say anything about me that I haven't already said about myself. You know, she was on those empty You know, she had an abortion. You already said it. Yeah, like yeah, this is me, you know, I I I I

not having the facade and not being real that is like the biggest fear of mine like somebody finding out I'm fake or phony or a lie like that is like a fear like no this is me I am real this is what comes with it if you if you know me if you don't know me whoever is in my life is gonna get all of me so the truth whatever that is the truth isn't always pretty it's not you know what I mean so I'm willing to tell the truth even when it's

even when I've been through the dark times, even when I made horrible mistakes, even when I might have been blacked out drunk in my past. I've talked about this publicly, my abortion. I've had an abortion. The truth ain't always pretty, but I'd rather just be honest. I love that. I'm not saying it's right. I'm not saying all the choices I made were right, but it was the truth. It happened.

I can't erase my history. It happened. Whether I tell the truth or not, it still happened. Right, yes. I think vulnerability and transparency is a superpower. And I'm kind of trying to get a little bit more like you in certain areas to where you can still be raw and real and all the way out there, but it doesn't have to be a secret. It's just some things can be private. There you go.

It's not that it's a secret. I'm not hiding anything from you guys. But some things are sacred and private. Like I've thought about that recently with my love life. Like if I did get a boyfriend, if I did get serious and was like thinking, oh, this could be my husband. Would I share him with the world? Like that's sacred. Would I? I don't know.

Because when you open up that door for the audience, they feel like they have access now. So it's like, well, you put them on the Internet, but that don't mean you can have an opinion on every little thing. And to them it does.

You shouldn't have shared it. So when you put stuff out there, it's giving an open invitation like, y'all,

all millions of y'all that follow us come on in to my relationship come on in to you know my world so I don't know if I got in a relationship if I would share him with the world I would protect it yeah for as long as you can yeah okay because like I've talked about my dude on your podcast but nobody knows who he is yeah yeah so and I like it like that hold on my dude hold on

That was a question.

You're like... Don't make me take the cue cards and flip this. My dude.

Be in the moment. Be where your feet are. Don't like overthink. And that's what I used to do, B. This is my husband.

Enjoy what you have with this person. And oh my gosh, I love that.

Am I ready for love? You know what, before I go to that, can I ask you a question about him? I don't, why are you trying to jump off him? Don't be trying to ask. Y'all see what I did there? What about taking back control? As Cherie says, drive the car. So be. Okay, I have one little question. What kind of work was he putting in?

Very. And you asked me, am I ready for love? Are you ready for love, B? I think... You pray for all these things, like you said, but when it comes, I pray that I can handle it and I don't run back to the toxicity that I'm used to.

I've always been like that, but I think subconsciously it was also a protection because nobody can say anything about me that I haven't already said about myself. You know she was on Ozempic. You know, she had an abortion. You already said it. Like, yeah, this is me. You know, I not having the facade and not being real. That is like the biggest fear of mine.

comfortable with. I'm comfortable not being seen. So I'm comfortable having guys chase me or I'm comfortable not being a priority. So I know how to wait around and hope they text me. So when the good thing comes, it's like, is he love bombing me? Or you instantly are negative. Like, is this just his, no, maybe he's a good person. And this is how a healthy relationship should be.

So just hoping that I can handle it when it comes. Cause I do believe it's going to come.

Go back over there. Yeah. It's over here.

Like in this season, when I said the word is progress, keep making progress. I have a relationship coach. She's out in L.A. I haven't worked with her in a while, but she's like, OK, you write down all these things. What type of and we talked about this. What type of woman does this man need? Like you want him to be disciplined. You want him to be in shape. Yeah. You still eating donuts at 2 a.m.

Like, you want all these things. You want to be financially stable. Are you taking care of your finances?

But is it going to last you for the next two decades?

For the next three decades? You got it now, B, but are you being a good steward over your money? Like, me breaking all the bad habits so I can't attract that person, I still have a lot of work to do.

Because it's like you don't have to work on something. Absolutely.

Yes. I'm not, okay, what's a non, I'm sorry, I don't ask you so many questions.

What is a hard non-negotiable for you? Like non-negotiable we know means we can't negotiate. If this happens, I literally look you in your eye. If this happens, I will walk away. No matter how much I love you, no matter how much we've invested, no matter what. This is a non-negotiable. What would you say is a hard non-negotiable? Maybe we haven't been married yet, right?