Arturo
Appearances
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
¿En serio? No, pues no sé.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
O sea, no es como que se tomaba por hecho ya, pero yo sentía que era una conversación. O sea, se podía como pedir en una conversación.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, o sea, yo planeaba decirte como, bueno, pues ya deberíamos de ser novios. Llevamos tanto tiempo saliendo tal, ¿no? Pero sin como el... ¿Quieres ser? Ajá, o sea, es que... Tuve eso con la primera novia que tuve. Y luego, espera, espera, espera.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Yo soy un chavo... Yo no sabía si se usaba o no. No, pero yo voy a contar.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, no, no, no. O sea, está fuera de contexto. Grave, grave.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pues es que, o sea, para mí no había tenido una relación ya grande. Entonces, no sabía si... Estaba raro de que... Hacer un show, si me explico. O sea, de que vas al cine y en los créditos. De que quieres ser vino. Si me explico, o sea... En el recibo de... No sé. En un plato en el restaurante. Ah, sí, sí, sí. Y luego... Si lo... O sea, en las películas y así. La gente adulta.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Dice que, bueno, pues ya están saliendo y ya. Y ya.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pues no sabía si iba a estar raro. Si tú vas a decirle que qué pedo.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
O sea, no sabía, no sabía yo.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Cómo... Cómo era el show.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Es que ¿cuánto llevábamos saliendo?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
¡Órale! Dos semanas. Y según yo, ese día me fui a, creo, Puebla o algo así. Y venía de regreso y te puse, ¿qué onda? En la tarde, ¿qué hacemos?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Porque teníamos un plan. Pero pues no teníamos un plan concreto. Entonces yo dije, bueno, pues ¿qué hacemos?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, pero fue como cinco horas después.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Y yo acababa de ir a Puebla.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Bueno, al día siguiente tú te ibas a no sé dónde en camión. ¿Te acuerdas? ¿Dices qué? Y te dejó el camión y te quedaste tú enojada.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, pues sí, ¿qué onda? ¡Órale! no sé si le pregunté a alguien seguro le pregunté a alguien es normal no yo ser mala onda bueno el chiste es que seguro no me acuerdo bien la verdad pero seguro pregunté sobre si estaba bien mi comportamiento en ese momento yo no sabía eso Pues yo me imagino, ¿no?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, yo que le hablé a Diego.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Y le dije como, oye, hice esto. Me fui a Puebla a trabajar. Y luego regresé y le pregunté, ¿qué hacemos al rato? Y se enojó. Y pues ya.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Y Diego, ¿qué pendejo eres?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No. Me dijo, no, pues... Pues es ilegal, ¿no?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, luego no hicimos nada. Es lo que querías. Ya. Ya no hicimos nada. Ya no hicimos nada.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Y fue Jay Cortés. Estuvo cool.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pero el día siguiente, seguías enojada y te ibas tú a Puebla, o no, ¿a dónde te ibas? ¿En camión? Para una marca, ¿te acuerdas? Y te dejó el camión.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pues se solucionó. Fuimos contentos.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, pero se solucionó y nos fuimos contentos.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
En la central de camino...
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Es que eso fue, pero eso fue ya fuera de mi casa, sí, ¿cierto?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, pues pensé que fundamentalmente... ¿Tú no querías? Sí, o sea, yo dije, pues te enojaste y yo en el momento... Y sostengo que no hice tampoco nada tan grave. Entonces dije como, maybe no... Pues no jalamos, ¿o qué? Y estamos en la calle, ¿te acuerdas?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pues sí, o sea. Obvio. Sí, y luego estábamos, te digo, en la calle, estuvo raro, o sea, como que siempre hay gente cortando en la calle, ¿no?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Y de qué pasa si dices, como, se están peleando. Uy, ¿y eran esa pareja? Entonces, como que éramos nosotros eso. Ajá. Y yo dije, como, qué pedo.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Sí, pero no estuvo tan grave.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, pues que está muy mal eso. Yo no entiendo de esa gente. Ah, ya sé. De que... Se ve que Cassandra te trata mal, escapa de ahí Arturito. Y yo de que, ¿qué pedo?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Sí, pues un amigo me mandó un, un este, como clip de TikTok, donde estabas hablando de mí, y luego lo borró, dije como, qué pedo culo, ¿por qué?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Y lo volví, ah, me dijo de que no, es que ya vi los comentarios, y pues ya, o sea, dije como, mejor no se lo mando, entonces obviamente le dije, mándomelo otra vez, y ya lo vi, y eran puros vatos de que, escapa de ahí, de que se ve que esa morra es de la verga, las dos, de que andabas hablando de pura pendejada.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
O sea, yo obviamente no tomo parte como en los comentarios, ¿sí? Pero sí recuerdo pensar como...
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Sí, es todo absurdo. Ya regresamos a lo mismo. Luego hablamos.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, estamos hablando de Juan.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Es que sí tengo un problema.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Ajá, sí, sí, sí. O... Sí, es que sí, estoy enfermo. O sea... No, no estás enfermo. Tengo como... Como que no me gusta usar las cosas.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
pero para eso son es que Arturo dice que yo el otro día me dijo de que el shampoo y así bueno no el shampoo pero como entonces no me baño no no el shampoo no el shampoo pero como como que la pasta no no no no todo por ejemplo Arturo no cosas que son como de un solo uso ya entiendo como una gorra a lo mejor
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Es un ejemplo, no sé. Pero, por ejemplo, como los... Cosas que me pones como en los garinitos, las estrellitas. Y es como, nada, seguro se quita solo para que lo uso.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Ajá, exacto. porque siento que son tus productos como como mis calcetines como no pero Arturo es caro y cool y yo es como como que no me gusta usarlo digo como no pues ya es tuyo y también lo mío así lo trato por alguna razón sí sí sí la vez pasada me dijo de que es que tú tú tratas muy mal tus cosas y le dije Arturo no las trato mal las uso jaja
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, pues ¿qué tal que nos mudamos?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
No, lo de hackeado ya aquí con el ojo.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Es muy importante eso. No, real, real, sí. Hay gente que se dedica nada más a hacer cajas.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
llegando a la casa ¿puedes unirte al camino de Juan?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Ah, pensé que nosotros decíamos. Ustedes dicen.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
¿Por qué contaste ese secreto?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Es que así decía mi papá y así decía su papá.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pero es algo que hacías tú.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
De esto se trata la dinámica, ¿no? Sí. De algo que haces tú.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
¿Me gugutata? No, no, no. ¿Ah, sí?
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
¿Te acuerdas? Ayúdame, Arturito.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Yo me acuerdo más que tú.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Y yo había llegado y había dejado mi coche en el ballet. Y tú llegaste en el tuyo.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Me metiste una sonrisita ahí.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pues igual que Juan, muy bonita.
Las Alucines
El Amor - ¡INVITAMOS A NUESTROS NOVIOS! l Las Alucines l 01x33
Pues que eres muy chistosa, fluía muy rápido. Y yo estaba nervioso también, como ahorita.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Stay out of my corner. That's my corner. You couldn't pay me to get anywhere near that corner.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, fuck! I got a three. Move my guy three spaces. Oh, move back three spaces! Fuck! Hold on, hold on. Okay. I got a five. Oh, move back five spaces! Oh, fuck! Hold on. Gosh! Six! I thought we were playing Trouble! I got a six, move me. Move me six! Oh, I just win, that's it? Oh, this is a stupid game, let's play again. Oh, let's play the Game of Life! Gosh, I'm a travel agent!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh gosh, I forgot that this was back... Oh, I'm counting. Oh god. I get a split level of this salary? Gosh, I remember when that was possible.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, there's a set of books called Dungeons and Dragons. I'm going to roll up a character. I'm going to play Barnabas the Dreadawake, a triton barbarian. Now that sounds pretty fun.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, yeah, the time I broke my back. I don't know how we got off so easy.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
That's true. All right, uh, Feobold, what the fuck is that? I guess Feobold. Oh, yeah, no, they're cow people. Cow people? Yeah. Wait, cow people? Yeah, you're a fever. That's me, I'm the cow person. Yeah, you give me the cow person, yeah.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
They got really popular around 2018, 2019.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yeah, what the fuck? The brutal blade? God, who thought of that? It's very edgy. It's edgy and uncreative.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Who buys the title The Dreadway? Isn't that pretty badass?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
That's just what I fucking am. That's so lame. Oh, why don't you make him gold so it's just a little different? Oh, I guess. Just to run Peg down. Yeah, just make him gold.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Wait, was it visible the whole time?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
And then, hello, I am Greg. My name is Dungeon Master. Greg. My name... Oh, it's Dennis! It's me, I'm Greg. I am the Teller of Tales. We're doing mysteries. My name is Mr. Encephius. Mr. E. Isn't that cool? I will run the adventure. Finally.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Gosh, I feel like after all of these 387 years... I've lost my optimism and cheerfulness. I'm down to one cheerful instead of double cheerful. Well, had he walked up the stairs, he would have been in a world of hurt. Yeah, I would have free skied yeti him. Don't get any weird ideas.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
My name's Ladle L. You can just call me Ladle for short. I grew up in a soup house. My folks were the masters of muktuk stew. So I ate a whole lot of muktuk. I'm so cheerful, I'm double cheerful. I'm double cheerful and optimistic. So I'm not too worried about this dragon. I'm sure everything will turn out fine. And, you know, so what I knew is that the key to a good mug tuck is steel.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Is that you just gotta use cheese just past expiration. You know, that's my secret, I think. What's your name? My name is Ladle, spelled Ladle. You can ignore the L-E-L at the end. Ladle-ell. My parents were memers on Reddit at an unfortunate time.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
My weapon of choice is a giant ladle. that I've reflavored from a mom, and I'm double cheerful and optimistic, and my greatest achievement is that I'm so good at eating muktuk, I won silver medal at a muktuk eating contest, and that's the best one, because we're silver dragon ballers.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
That's canonically true, gold in second place. I got first, which is silver. I got a giant fucking spoon, so I eat a lot of muktuk, which if you don't know, it's made from whale blubber. I came from a long line of harvesters of whales. Anyway, everything's going to be fine, folks.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Can we call you Z for short? And what's your weapon of choice? You can call him. It's like Lazy Boy. Laz-y. That's how I wrote it. He's like a one-piece character.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Hey, hey, hey, fellas. The name's Arturo, but that's dumb as fuck, so you can call me Artie, all right?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Call me Artie, all right? Jeez. Yeah, Artie. And I'm a bit of a pugilist, a bit of a brawler, and you can see that, you know, I'm a little greedy.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, everybody knows that I use illicit dragonborn drugs. Heavily. And I'm greedy because drugs are expensive. I'm known for the fact that... I like bigger gals, to the point of I once fucked and then married a Yeti.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Um, and, uh... Oh gosh, I get it! Uh, and my, uh... My, I think my weapons would be two large, like, dragon claw gauntlets. Ooh. Okay. Yeah. Hell yeah.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I was without a road trip! with my wife and a Yeti, and it was terrible. One was a beast that was super hairy and bad breath and really male tempered, and the other was a Yeti.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Gosh, I think it's going to all work out fine. That dragon's probably gonna leave us alone if we, you know, once it's had enough.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Shucks, they're screaming with joy. And there's no place I'd rather be with my pals already lazy and sorry. Here on the top of the mountain. And you know what? Even if there's rough stuff happening down below, it sure is a nice view.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, the plan is we go down there and we kill it, because it's coming for us next.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Of course we'll win. Yeah, exactly right. It can't beat us. Yeah, there's no way. There's no way we could lose. You always got to look on the bright side of life. Unless... Ooh. Unless what? It's under all of our weaknesses. Gosh, well, that means that it'll see us as more vulnerable, kind companions that'll let us go.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yeah, you always... I want you all to know that. You always mention it. I keep mentioning it because I mean... It always comes up in conversation.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Absolutely. I thought that movie was man, given the subject matter and all. Conflict of interest. Well, all I know is that whatever we decide to do, it'll be the right decision. Listen, the one thing we can all say for sure, okay, is that we've all had sex. Okay? You've had sex?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I took a vow of celibacy once, but we all know the only reason I did it was so that I could break it, because that's a badass thing to do, okay? Well, I don't know about you fellows, but as chaste as chaste gets, I wear the white cloak with pride. I am by vows. Do you have something in your eyes? Yeah, the snow blighters. Do you know the huge car snow blighters can manifest as an elemental?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Of course you know that. Is that fucking true? Yes. What a stupid idea. After the mud tucking contest, it's just a little tough. Oh, shit. It's a little tough.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
No, your grace, you always got to look at the bright side. You always said that Argent Holm would never fall.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yeah, he's kind of like a Gary Stu, you know what I mean? Someone who's being dragged wasn't enough.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Why would you break your oath?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, you know, I'm sure that his grace will look the other way. I mean, this is the fucking kid, the emperor, you know? He's got wings, he just flew up. I mean, as he was talking about, oh! Yeah, he's got two different colored eyes. It's really cool, your grace. We'll do whatever you say, because you always have the best plans.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
We'll protect the mansion with our lives, not like we'll need to, because we'll all survive.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yes, Your Grace, we'll do anything if it makes you proud of us. Just tell me what to do. I just need orders, that's all. I'm very decisive.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
What do we do? What do we do? Somebody tell me what to do. Yes, you guys just gotta use positive thinking. We're gonna be okay.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
So I guess I'll sacrifice my giant ladle, folks. And I would do anything for the survival of my friends and my king, I mean my emperor, whom I've taken a vow of loyalty and celibacy that I've never violated. Yes, thank you. And I haven't regretted it once. Okay, here we go, ladle saving the day. I'm gonna stick, I'm gonna flip my ladle around and try to shove it into the bed.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You guys are never going to believe this. I got a 26. You're right, I don't believe it.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
By the power of Bucktuck, I've done it!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Sorry, you're using the great cheesecloth technique that your dear old dad taught you. I got a 19. A 19.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
What happens if he dies? Does it work like Santa Claus and, like, we become the Emperor? He's not gonna die, he's gonna be fine, look! Hold on, I got just the thing, I got just the thing.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I take out a little silver, almost like a little vial with like a flat bottom and a little screw cap, and I'll screw it off and I will, I have like long dragon boar nails, but my dragon boar nail is especially long. And from this little vial, I tap out a little bit of silver dust onto the nail. All right, I will prop the ember up.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
All right, you just snort as hard as you can and do it, like you're shoving it in his nostril. You do that, and he...
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Did you just get the ember so high you left off the platform and thought you could fly to the bottom? Yeah, I mean... He has wings, ladies and gentlemen.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Your father was a real good guy. The good old cheeseburger. Our folks always used to be good friends. I look away. Your dear old dad, the cheeseburger. Oh, yes, my...
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
As good as we can be. Pretty good stuff, right? Nothing hurts us. Nothing hurts us. Yeah, there's really no time limit. We're pretty good. Thoughts and prayers, thoughts and prayers.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
No, I'm sure we'll see it real soon.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, yeah, and your order and your command, your grace. We'll be right down, no problem at all. If only we had wings. We've got the wings on our hearts. Thoughts of praise, thoughts of praise.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I guess he's in a better place now. Wait, so does it work like Santa Claus? I don't know. Wait, I have an idea.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I always feel better after I eat some butter.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Thank you, Ladle L. No problem, you can just call me Ladle like you always have, son. Yeah, sorry, you're getting a little sentimental, huh?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I mean, are you a little down that your daddy died?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I think you've managed to escape. I need a parachute.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh gosh, I could use a nice cask of wine right now to celebrate our survival.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You know, Lazy, you're killing me. I went last to make sure that nobody else used this voice, and now there's two of us, and I guess that's five minutes.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. I'll take a bump of beer unless it drives. Alright, you wanna use my nail or yours? Yeah, well, I don't have a nail.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh gosh, I think you could too!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You could probably just punch it right through, and it would break off through and save the day! It wouldn't even be close, I mean, I could punch it right through. Why didn't you try it, Lazy?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Sarcophagus. Sarcophagus, thank you. You know, gosh, I can't wait until we can all get executed. I'll reach down, I'll pick him up. I'll be there helping you. We gotta follow our vision. You know, we all failed as Kingsguards, so now it's really only right that we all get executed as soon as we wake up. You remember.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
It doesn't matter anymore! Well, I do enough shaving at home, let me tell you, you're not missing anything. I haven't seen you grow a facial hair after once this entire time. I mean, with Dragonborn, I mean, we don't... Hey, why are you giving him a hard time? We're just asking the question... The Emperor just died, we're all feeling a little emotional, we failed our sacred oaths, but that's okay.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Everybody fails their sacred oaths sometimes, and is destined to get executed after centuries of stasis, lovebirds. It's not so big a deal.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Damn it to the downhills. Oh. Well, shut up, Parge, anyway. Down the hedge! See all of the next quadrillion years!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Thank goodness no one discovered my terrible blood curse. LAUGHTER
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I'm a real threat in the Muktuk eating contest, and I never told you about my blood curse of cetacean lycanthropy!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, everything's going to be fine, your grace, even a death. And I'll just grab a giant rat and go off. Roll to attack. I'm going to just try to devour... I'm basically cho-gathing my way through this, for those who know. 20 to hit. Oh, that hits. I don't know if my Limit Break gives me special powers or anything.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yeah, I just grab it and I rip its head off. Gosh, tastes just like Muktuk.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You picked the wrong day to get a taste of the claws!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Are you literally a whale guy right now, or am I just fucking tripping? Yeah, have you always been able to do that?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
We've been here for centuries, right?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, no worries, I have a sundial.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Can't we even go back to sleep without any more potion? The Emperor never told us if there was any more potion. Then he just died after saying yes. I think we're kind of like undead wights at this point.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I kind of like this. This is sort of better than your old version. You should just stay like this. Yeah, I think, I don't know how to turn it off. I ate all of my mud tuck and washed it down, and I think this might be permanent, folks.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, hold on. Maybe if I, oh, God, it's my sarcophagus is in pieces. I should have burst out like the Kool-Aid man. I should have thought about that.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, thank you. I'm gonna throw you up into the hole. What do you think, Zari?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
One of us could invent a grappling hook, and I don't even have to get up there. Gosh, that's like, none of us will fit in that hole. Yeah, it's about like one-thirtieth of an ogre wide.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I'm a pretty big fella. I have my limit break, the master of buck tuck.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I mean, that's about the distance of, like, nine ogres laying down.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Hold on, we're twisting you twice. Two twists, two twists, two twists.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
While they're doing that, can I invent a grappling hook and throw it up there?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
My magic! Gosh, thank goodness for my large, blubbery body. Otherwise, you would have broken the rest of you. Moments later, you're... Thoughts and prayers, thoughts and prayers. The rope is holding. You're not as good. I'll open the box again.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Who's got a knife? What's the knife for? To get all the whale oil. Oh, I got a knife, take this. It's gonna be like, ahhh!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I always skipped conversions class. Fractions, fractions of an ogre. It's okay, because the death rate of hobbyist spelunkers is only like 60%. Does this count as spelunking?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You're doing great, Sauron! Also, shit, I didn't notice we got a raid seven minutes ago. Dang, thank you! Don't follow Dead Aussie Gamer. Hopefully you guys are still here. Thank you so much for the raid. We're just playing some D&D, some side story shenanigans. So give Dag a follow, and thank you so much.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
All right. I guess we gotta go get him. I mean, I can just shoot him down if you want me to.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
That sounds pretty cool. It's a multi-purpose. You think I can just punch? I mean, we got a fucking ranged attack. I'm not going to leave that on the table.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You can just shoot him down with your gun.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
The AC is 20! So if I roll well, fellas.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I'm gonna try to catch my dearest chum, sorry!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You think that means we can't leave this room at all? Yes. Well, is it either that or maybe there's drugs up there? If it felt kind of like drugs, I mean, is it possible that the rats had drugs?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Almost instantly. It was painful. It wasn't fun. I mean, there could be illicit dragonborn drugs, is all I'm saying. But hey, you're alive and you have your libs intact. That's true. We should chalk that up as a weird, you know what I mean?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yeah, sure, what's up? You think they have girl were-whales anywhere in the world? Like, blood curse-wise, you got a sister? Gosh, I don't know. You don't know if you have a sister? No, I mean, I don't have a sister. Oh. I come from a long line of whales. And we all eat so much mud chuck that we all turn into were-whales, because you are what you eat, you know what I mean?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
It's like the saying of over the lips through the gums, watch out stomach, here it comes.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I was always worried that if I, once you break the, you know, it's like a can of ye olde Pringles. Once you pop, you just can't stop. You know what I mean? I was just worried that I wouldn't be able to transform back into a beautiful, draconic form.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
It's okay. Maybe I'll be able to just shrink back down if I just believe hard enough. Thoughts and prayers. Thoughts and prayers.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, fuck! Well, I guess it's true that I am the master of bucktuck. I'm a real threat to the bucktuck unicorns. What you're saying is that all I got to do is feed someone just a lot of muck duck, and this happens? Well, I think it's kind of more of like a combination. Like, it's nature and nurture. You know what I mean? It comes from a long line of muck duck stew bakers.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Wait, can you summon the Wienermobile to drive us out of here?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I got a fever, and the only prescription is Lady Weh-Weh. Oh. Because you know what they say, once you go Yeti, you never forget-y. And then you just, you got to keep climbing on that ladder. I'm looking for the next run, fellas.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yeah, I'm sorry to say. And I mean, you should stop chasing the mythical blowhole. That's a saying in my family. You don't want to go down that road. You go down a path that no one can follow. It's a dark turn. But chasing the mythical blowhole's all I know.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You know, I appreciate your gumption, but Artie, what the fuck are you talking about?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yes. Yes. You're gonna get broken. You're gonna get snapped like a twig.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
That's what the drugs are for. It keeps you powered through, eh? A little bit of chipper up. It does.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yes. I don't know if I can... I don't know if I can do it.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Yes, I heard she married a doctor. I cannot believe your memories are that vivid from fourth fucking grade. You really did peak, didn't you?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Do you have a single accomplishment that's not second-handed and related to somebody else? Well, I've met a lot of famous people in our time here. Oh, you've met somebody, you've danced with somebody, you're the son of somebody. What have you done, huh?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
It came up organically. Well... Is that on my card or something, or are you just making this shit up? At least I was told that I fuck a Yeti.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Put it up. Imagine owning the world's greatest love songs. Tell me how am I supposed to live without you? Time Live Music presents the ultimate love songs connection.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
It's very explicitly noise. Please turn it down. Please turn it down. I can't wait until we get to the part about love lifting us up where we belong. Love lifting us up where we belong.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, remember that commercial? I think that maybe 75% of our audience is too young to understand that. Gosh, some people have an ocean breeze, some people have a storm, but gosh.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, well, maybe I can try. I mean, I just became a whale person to eat some giant rats like 20 minutes ago. Hold on. Hello. Hello. Oh, gosh. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
With the seals broken, you will be awoken. I'm twisting, twisting.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
This is it, fellas. This is our ticket. This is our ticket back to sleep. What? What is it? What did you find? You ever had a poppy seed bagel?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
They're pretty good, but everything's better. Everything's better than a poppy seed bagel?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh, you would like a bagel dog, wouldn't you? Just a bagel just wrapped around the hot dog. I mean, the only way to make a hot dog better is by wrapping it in a bagel. Artie, it's fucking science. Just look, just imagine a poppy seed bagel, but like 38,000 ogre times better. You understand? That's a lot of ogres. Now remember, one drop makes you feel real good, right?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Two drops, it'll knock you right out.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
No, no, we're taking two drops and we're going back to sleep until we get woken up by more rats.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh my god. This is perfect. It's so fitting.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
No, no, nobody said that, okay? Is it a little dull?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, I think two droppers. Yeah, hold on, hold on, I don't know.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
As you give coffee here, two compact discs for $16.00. Unbelievable. Oh, God.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I only awoke because of Ladle L's horrific screams!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I see the mark, it's like a little rat. The target's, like, swirling.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I must devour the trailer, the whispers of the old ones.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I'm gonna grab one of his legs and start pulling him out of the grasp of the ladle.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Laid-A-Low, I know that I wear well and laziness.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
You better be careful, I'm gonna take you on a Nantucket sleigh ride! Motherfucker! A little bit of old whaling history for ya. What the fuck's Nantucket? What the fuck is this? Fuck! What does it say? What does it say? I mean, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. I'm just so double cheerful and optimistic. Everything's going to get fine.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
We're going to keep out of here just fine. I think I can... I'm so cheerful and optimistic, I'm going to squeeze into that rat hole, you know what I mean?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I slide down. I think we're trapped. It's okay. Everything's fine. Thoughts and prayers. Thoughts and prayers.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
That's really funny. Oh no. Oh gosh, where's Mr. Bombastic when you need him? Gosh, I really wanted to get out so we can all be beheaded for failing our emperor.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Gosh, I think I'm too much of a big whale for that to have much of an effect, I guess. How long do you think until the madness truly sinks in?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Look for any secret levers or levers or buttons. Or maybe at least more potion. I mean, anything. We got a fucking eternity in here. We got time. That's right. Until we perish. Surely we'll find something! I smash the jar next to me, and I just start ripping things apart. My tail comes down and smashes it.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh my gods. What does this mean? You open, from the music, you open a portal to a tauren inn. I completely forgot that.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I just can't believe it. It didn't occur to me at first. Well, gosh, I knew that we were going to figure it out. We're all so smart and everything's going to turn out so well. This is what our great emperor wanted to happen. He knew that rats were going to devour his desiccated corpse. So now what? What do we do now? Now we go on.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
We fulfill our destiny and go find someone who can behead us for failing our emperor.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I'm sure it's fine. I'm sure that dragon's long gone and all of our families are real safe and sound. Well, regardless, we're doing what we were tasked to do.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Flip through some of these options and let's see what, you know, I kind of want to kill something, so is there like a portal that we can go through?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I know, it's fucking hard to write. Arturo was my father's name, all right? I have always called you that, my brother. Well, I don't like it.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
We have an eternity together.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Ah! We found it! We did it! The Lifetime's ultimate collection of love songs. It was really the power of love. Which isn't shocking when you actually own this collection. It seemed like a missed opportunity.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Anyway, I'll take this with us when we blast off to the stars. Oh, it already broke!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
We've got all the time in the world!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
We're drug addicts and we're... Well, that's because it's goofy. With some silver dust, that's all I got. It's busy bad eggs! Drink up, be hardy, yo-ho!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Well, I'm out of ideas. I thought I saw this book. Ye find yourself in yon dungeon. Ye see a flask. Obvious exits are north, south, and Dennis. Dennis? Dennis is in your direction. What would thou need? What are you reading?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Okay. We go in the direction of Dennis. I think we're trapped. There's no way out. Here's the thing, I haven't used my limit break yet. Should we just fight to the death? Just to pass the time?
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
And then all of a sudden, you will see a sea mammal. appear in the shape of a glorious animal, weirdly, appear around my hand as I say, dolphin blow! And I uppercut his hand. And I leap, and there's a beautiful silver dolphin that comes with my hand.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Oh my gosh! I didn't know the dolphin blow was so powerful. I just really like dolphins and blow. I mean... Stop trying to play cool, you did that on purpose. Wow. First, that's very funny. Second, I mean, he asked for it. I mean, I figured we were like zombie knights. I didn't think we'd just die like that. I think I just severed his vertebrae three or four and just killed him instantly.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Everything's actually going to be fine. I don't know my own strength. Everything's going to be fine. When I whip out the old dolphin blow. Well, you know what they say. You know what the crime, the crime for killing a fellow brother of the Watchers is? To get beheaded. On walkovers. I fucking freeze to yeti.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Holy fuck, where did you come from? Did I even have a way to get out of that? Did I need a space bomb or something? It was really unclean.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
No, what is that? What the fuck? Lifetime. Lifetime. Yeah, Lifetime, whatever.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Love lift us up where we belong.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
That's what I was afraid of. I'm going to be double the personality trait. Double stupid. Yeah.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
I think we'll be out of here the next week! I think it'll be fine.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Thoughts and prayers! Thoughts and prayers!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Folks, I invented bowling! It's terrible, but there's nothing else to do!
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
Scoring doesn't make any sense! Oh, look, you got a strike. Let's all look at the screen while it plays a weird, metaphoric, bad CGI short film. The spaceship from the other room flies in and crashes into the emperor's bones and they all get alive.
Legends of Avantris
Icebound | Side Story 2 | A Story For Another Time
He's born as a child, then he like goes through life, and he flies through space, and then he quickly ages and dies, and like, whoa!