Angela D. Beaver
Appearances
I've Had It
MAGA Jesus is a D**k
I was listening to today's episode, and I just think that Angela D. Beaver, attorney at law, because I give a damn, would be a great tagline.
I've Had It
MAGA Jesus is a D**k
I have had it with these women who are grandmothers. that have to select And choose what they're going to be called as grandmothers. So, you know, there are women that say, well, I would like to be called Nana. Or I would like to be called Granny. Or I would like to be called Meemaw. Like our incredible Meemaw pumps. But here's the thing. How about...
I've Had It
MAGA Jesus is a D**k
just let the child call you what they want to call you. Like, why are you making this all about yourself and your preference? Like grandma naming conventions, you have to be in control of that too. I don't know. Just be called what your little grandbaby wants to call you and quit acting like you're entitled to give yourself some preferred grandma naming convention. What the
I've Had It
MAGA Jesus is a D**k
fuck just i don't know people just make everything so hard and i've had it
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Booking.com. Booking. Yeah. Yeah. So we're supposed to start the podcast. Ready? One, two, three. Patriot. Patriots. Gay-triots. They-triots. It is the dawning of a beaver, Angela D. Beaver, America's best DEI podcaster here with you deep in the bowels of Trump's America. And the bowels is the absolutely perfect description. Yeah. All right, Pumps, what have you had it with?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Isabella, the second part, I love that. Thank you for listening. Let's get to the tea. Let's get to the first part. Let's get to the current vice president of the United States. He is a failed drag queen. He attempted to be a drag queen in college. He failed miserably. Drag queens around the globe probably are erupting in celebration to this date. His official vice presidential portrait
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
is the most yassified thing i've ever seen in my life and i have a theory okay i have a theory and this is i'm gonna roll out my theory right here it's pretty controversial so fasten your seat belts if you look at early jd vance photos okay when he was running for senate he's puffy Hair's not a great, at a great style. He doesn't dress very well. Chubby, sloppy looking, right?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Then he goes off to Silicon Valley and hangs out with Peter Thiel, who is a part of the billionaire oligarch, opposes democracy, bizarrely, and he is a gay man. After J.D. Vance's time with Peter Thiel, he comes out looking like he got queer-eyed. He does. No, there's no doubt about that. There's no doubt. He looks like he got queer-eyed in Silicon Valley by Peter Thiel.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And then the eyeliner starts. And I just am telling everybody right here, right now. Poor Usha Vance. I see her. She looks like hostage. Because I think when JD comes home from work... He has a drag closet somewhere and he's popping smoky eyes. He's putting on a lash. He's doing, you know, a lot of stuff. He's, you know, we've got feather boas. We, and I think that's what goes on in the evenings.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And I think Peter Thiel yassified him. and let him you know come he was kind of got to be gay at peter teal's camp and then he had to come back out now he has to cosplay being a straight man and the one thing he can't get give up is that eyeliner yeah he can't he cannot quit the eyeliner he can't quit it no it's i mean it is broke back mountain quit can't quit jd vance in the eyeliner
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
This episode of I've Had It is brought to you by Booking.com. Booking. Yeah. Every time I use Booking.com, I find a place to stay in the US. I know they'll have exactly what I'm looking for. They have a huge variety of options from hotels to vacation rentals, and I'm always able to find something that fits my specific needs. I found that Booking.com has something for everyone.
I've Had It
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Recently, I took my oldest son and his girlfriend to New York City. They wanted to stay in Soho. Through Booking.com, I was able to find the perfect hotel for us. What I like about Booking.com is I can find a great variety. vacation rental where my kids and I both have our own space and we have a common area to enjoy so we don't get sick of each other.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Listener, no matter who you are, Booking.com helps you find the stay that's ridiculously right for you. Find exactly what you're booking for on Booking.com, Booking.yeah. Some might say homes.com is the best home shopping site. Could it be because it has a sleek, spam-free site? Or the most in-depth school info?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Homes.com knows every parent wants the best for their kids, so they're the only ones with school and district details and reviews from multiple sources, including Niche. It may be homes.com's super comprehensive and transparent agent directory, or maybe it's that homes.com is the only site that always directly connects you with the listing agent who knows the home best.
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I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Go to homes.com today for home shopping the way it should be. Homes.com. We've done your homework. Hey, ladies, did you know that one of the most common complaints from women about their sexual health is a frustratingly low libido? Our sex drives can decline, but it's also treatable.
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Addi or flibanserin is FDA approved and has been clinically proven to increase sexual desire in certain premenopausal women who are bothered by a low libido. So if you feel like you've lost your desire and you want to get it back, stop falling for the snake oils and ask your doctor today about Addi. Go to Addi.com. That's A-D-D-Y-I.com.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Now we've got people just willy-nilly coming to your door. I am 100% in agreement with you. I don't like forced capitalism, and that's what this is. They are forcing it upon you in the privacy of your own home. And even if I thought it was a really great service and I really needed the service, I
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
A man walked 280 miles to cool off after arguing with his wife. Departing from his home in Como, which is in Italy, he traveled southward averaging about 40 miles per day until reaching the coastal town of Fano. Along the way, he relied on the kindness of strangers for food and drink. At around 2 a.m., police discovered the man in Fano.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Upon verifying his identity, they learned that his wife had reported him missing a week earlier. Despite his extensive trek, the man appeared lucid and focused. His wife subsequently traveled to Fano to retrieve him, covering both his hotel expenses and the imposed fine. I'll tell you what. I admire this. Yeah, he was mad, wasn't he? I just admire like, you know what? Fuck it.
I've Had It
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I'm taking my clothes off and I'm walking. I'm going to Forrest Gump this shit. Remember when Forrest Gump just took off? Ran. He just had it and he just ran. And I think this could be something really fun for Angela D. Beaver. A naked Beaver walk for democracy. How about with the hangers? That's now you're talking. Yeah.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Oh, was he naked or did I make that up? I think you made that up.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Oh, guess how the worm has turned. You know what I think it is from? I really, okay, I projected that. That was total, that was projection. I projected that this Italian man did this naked. Okay. And so I think where this is coming from is this deeply held desire that,
I've Had It
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that the listener and I have, that during Trump's America, that you take a field trip to an all-inclusive naked resort, nudist resort, and report back to us for content. It's your patriotic duty. Just my duty as an American citizen. And if you don't want to do it, you could, at the very minimum, send Angela D. Beaver to do it. Yasified. Yasified. Yeah. Yeah, let's fight up. Yeah. All right.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I'm sorry that I misread that story about him being naked. Here's the deal. I can't be away from my dog that long. I'll just say that. I'd have to take my dog with me on that walk. Can you take your dog to the nudist resort? He's nude. So I guess so. Okay. I have another news report. Around 76% of high-performing women receive negative feedback compared to only 2% of high-achieving men.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Why is this happening? Unconscious bias leads managers, male or female, to typically evaluate women as during performance reviews on their personality rather than the work they contribute. Are they easy to work with? Do they get along with everyone? Are they likable and collaborative? And this right here, these stats right here,
I've Had It
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This is why Donald Trump won against two different women because he can be the biggest, most unlikable, horrible piece of shit on the planet. And Hillary and Kamala had to do everything possible. And women that are in executive positions are judged a million times more. And this right here, this sexism, this inherent sexism and society's inability to embrace sexism.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Because they came to my front door without my consent and disturbed my alone time, my home time, it will always be a no. Right. And I do want to talk about the Mormons a bit. Okay. Because they're always fun to beat up on. They're so good. Here's what's so hilarious about Mormons. If you have a cult, right, and you're all in this cult and it's the Mormons.
I've Had It
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and appoint women to positions of power is why we're in this shit show that we're in. I completely agree. I think it's interesting.
I've Had It
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Now we have data to back this up because that is the inherent internalized sexism of so many people in this country. 76% of high performing women receive negative feedback from 2% of high-performing men receive negative feedback. Those stats are staggering. They are staggering. Okay. Do we have anything else on the agenda today before we move along with our regularly scheduled program?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Kylie, do you have anything to report from the lesbian parts of the earth?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Oh, my gosh. I want to say something to all of the gay-triots and they-triots out there. And this is something that really bugs the shit out of me. And I can only imagine how it makes you all feel. So a lot of corporations, Target, Amazon, et cetera, started DEI initiatives. Tesla actually used to be like a gay pride car.
I've Had It
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Years ago when Elon Musk would tweet about it, how it had gotten like 100% ranking from the gay community long before he started the ketamine and Russian and Donald Trump fellatio. But I digress. Okay. They act like they're all BFFs with the gay community. And then Trump wins. And then they drop you like a box of hot rocks. And there's no principle. There's no dignity. There's no loyalty.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And I think the one thing that I dislike in people more than anything else is... when they're inauthentic and disloyal. I really deeply value loyalty. And if you're going to be an ally of the LGBTQ plus community, be a fucking ally. And all you little white women that go visit your hairdresser who makes your hair look absolutely fabulous. And it makes you feel like, oh, I'm not a homophobe.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
My hairdresser's gay. And then you go triple Trump. I've had it. You know, it's it's an epidemic.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
That's absolutely how it should be. These people fucking suck. They're playing the short game right now. And the long game is simply this. White people are going to be a minority in the United States sooner rather than later. This is a very diverse culture. And they're playing the short game with something because it's all about shareholders and profits and kissing Donald Trump's ass.
I've Had It
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But at the end of the day, I think the message in Trump's America, what we have to sniff out is all of these people that are being inauthentic. And I'm talking about like politicians who are trying to run to the center and abandon LGBTQ plus rights. I'm just I'm not going to tolerate it. We're going to call them out. And this community needs to be supported. And here's something, too.
I've Had It
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There's this myth that Democrats only care about that one issue. Right. And the issue is this. We care about human rights. We care about freedom. You know how MAGA's like, well, I'm for freedom, Constitution. And so... We have to get a close-up on that face. I'm like, I want freedom. Fucking... Anyway... You're not for freedom. No. We're for freedom. All right. That's all. All right. Listen.
I've Had It
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Listen. Listen. Listen. We're positive. We're about positivity and light, unicorns and rainbows. That's right. Okay. Speaking of which, let's hear from our listener. Okay. First, we've got Erica. Okay. Okay.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And you're like having a meeting with everybody and you go, I'll tell you what we're going to do. We'll send the 18 slash 19 year olds door to door to recruit people. You know, like as a 50 year old woman that I'm going to answer the door and there's going to be some 18 year old Mormon kid that's going to change my complete worldview on existentialism and spirituality is so breathtakingly stupid.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Okay. Hang on. Miss Beaver, what do you have to say? What do you have to say for yourself? Okay. This is a great call. Great caller. Thank you. Okay.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
What percentage of the time do you think he lives? I'm going to go 20.
I've Had It
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So I got him this little floor mat. Let's pump the brakes on the rhetoric. Let me ask some hard-hitting questions here that she wants to answer too. Who do you love more? Obviously... I love Blizzard more. Okay. All right. But I love Blaze and I'm good to Blaze. I love on him like this morning.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
That's questionable though, because I don't want to, I don't want to, I don't want to go back down memory lane again, but you know, you do shave him and he has a Husky and veterinarians that we've met in person at our shows. Yeah. And not just veterinarians.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I believe one of them was a lesbian veterinarian, which I think makes you even more qualified if you're a lesbian veterinarian is greater than a heterosexual veterinarian. Agree. And because lesbians have superpowers. Our veterinarian is a lesbian veterinarian. And she's a DEI veterinarian. Because we exclusively use DEI hires. That's right. But you shave Blaze.
I've Had It
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It's just I find closeness when I can love on him without getting hair all over me. Let me ask you this. Let's say that Oliver Glizzard had like he was a fluffy Frenchie and he shed like crazy. and you shaved him, and then a couple of lesbian veterinarians said to you, listen to me, that is not good for that dog.
I've Had It
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It has an undercoat and an overcoat and a cooling and a heating and all the stuff that all the lesbian DEI veterinarians explained to us, right? Would you continue to shave Oliver Glizzard, or would you decline based on the advice of the said lesbian veterinarian? I'd probably continue to shave them because I just wouldn't. I call bullshit. Well, no, here's the deal. I call bullshit on that.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I can shave, like I do the vacuum every Sunday on blades. This is a hypothetical. Okay, but I'm just saying I would probably shave them.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Right. You know, I mean, it's just so dumb. And then that also reminds me of these Mormon TikTok videos where these kids are just like in a pretzel. They don't know if they want to kill a puppy or have a sip of coffee. Right. Like that shit is fucking crazy. And I think Brigham Young University is.
I've Had It
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So it wouldn't matter to me. If you were out with the dog and it was shaved and then somebody comes up to you and says, how long has your dog been on chemo? Would that impact any? No. Okay. All right. Let's move along.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Yeah. Yeah. I can see it. Don't you know that she sits around and thinks how many more days until he drops dead? I mean, don't you know she just actively thinks about that all the time?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Now, I think she's every bit as psycho and cruel and... Yeah, I'm no Melania fan at all. I think a woman that stands by a man that marginalizes other people like that. And it doesn't just go for Melania. This goes to a lot of white women.
I've Had It
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that are mothers and have maternal instincts that watch somebody dehumanize and marginalize groups of people and they like it and it tastes good to them i'm not i'm not down with that type of woman i'm not you know that women supporting women supporting women we're women supporting women i don't support those women nope Listener, have you noticed that everyone is losing weight?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
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I've Had It
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I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
should be closed down and canceled forever, that student after student is that morally bankrupt, that they would rather kill a puppy than have a sip of coffee. What kind of sociopathic breeding ground, training camp, indoctrination, Mormon bullshit is that? It really is breathtaking when you hear him say it.
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I've Had It
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Listener, I have to admit it. I travel a lot for work. And when I have a lot of airport time, I love to play games on my smartphone to help the time pass. And I'm so happy to share with you my new favorite game called June's Journey. It's free to download. You have to find objects hidden in beautiful, colorful, carefully crafted scenes.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
You can customize, remodel, and fix your mansion and garden island pumps. What's your favorite thing about June's Journey?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I feel so accomplished after I play this. And it's just so much fun, listener. I'm telling you, go download June's Journey for free by clicking the link. June's Journey is available on all iOS and Android mobile devices, as well as on a PC. Again, just go download June's Journey for free by clicking the link. June's Journey is available on iOS and Android mobile devices, as well as on PCs.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I love Holly and her accent. Love the accent. I appreciate Holly so much that she came to us to write PG-rated political bashing signs. That is such an ambitious ask.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Well, right when she said British and right when she said criticized Donald Trump, of course I thought Donald Trump is a cunt would be right at the top of my list.
I've Had It
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I think probably you can't say cunt. Here was what mine is. Obama's dick is bigger than yours. Okay. Perfect. Just that on the sign, he goes down, he sees Obama's dick. Okay, here's what you do, Holly. You go petty. And, of course, you tell your child, here's the sign that says, you know, we oppose fascism. And... You have your child hold that.
I've Had It
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Then you and your husband have these kind of like flip signs where it's like, we know you have a small penis, no small pricks in the UK. And that's the kind of shit that really matters to him the most. You are a bad golfer. You cheat at golf. You have small hands. Yeah. You can put that on. You have teeny tiny hands. Why are your hands so small? What else is so small? Everybody hates you.
I've Had It
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Everybody hates you. Your makeup's terrible. Your poll numbers are as small as your dick. That, that, I just got tingly inside. Get the hammer and the nail. All right. All right. Next.
I've Had It
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you know go to war versus have a coke i mean it's just nuts it's nuts it's absolutely crazy i was on instagram the other day and that i talked about this on patreon but there's this viral video where there's this brigham young mascot and he's like dancing i like my rolly rolly rolly and he's doing this dance and it's dynamite like it went viral he's dancing with cheer squad
I've Had It
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We have long been whistleblowing about this coach fraud. Right. And they're popping up all over the place. Yeah, they are. You got life coaches, you got relationship coaches, you have a weight loss training coach, coach, coach, coach, coach. If you're not on a sports team, don't call anybody else coach. Right. Don't do it. It's a racket, a total racket.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And they always prey on their people that are closest to them. All those multi-level marketing things, all the scams, they always start with the people on the inside, like their inner circle. You know where they're ubiquitous, all these multi-level marketing? Where? Mega churches. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. It's like breeding grounds for Trumpism, Stanley Cups, and faux coaches.
I've Had It
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And for those triple Trumpers listening, faux means fake in French. Just so you know. Just so you know. F-A-U-X.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
When I see these people, and I've seen a couple of these come up online that's like, I've lost...
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Yeah. Hate it. I completely agree with you. I think we need to demand job honesty. I don't know why people care. I really don't. Here's the thing. If you don't want to tell anybody anything, then don't attribute the weight loss to anything at all. Just say, oh, I don't know. Yeah, I have lost some weight and just go on.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
But if you're going to go on the jab and dramatically lose 40 pounds and you have the hollowed out cheeks and the sagging skin and all of the markers that everybody can see, and then you get to... your Instagram page and it's like, my new workout regimen and diet are crushing. It's just fraud. It's fraud. And it's not helpful to other people.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I think it would be motivational for someone to go, God, you can do the jab and then I can get there and I can start exercising and start changing my diet. I don't think there should be any shame in anybody who wants to do the jab. I don't either. I don't know why people associate with it. Okay. Last one.
I've Had It
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And it's like, dang, that mascot is, you know, really got some moves. And I was like, that's dynamite. Well, it popped up on my feed recently. And then it was like a reveal of the guy who was actually the mascot. And he's this gay guy. So then, of course, then I like segue over to his Instagram page.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
This is a great point. I can't believe we haven't brought it up. We have been remiss. Totally. At not mentioning this. And I'm going to tell you what I do. Whenever I'm at a restaurant and I probably, I mean, I've never been there before in my life. And maybe it's the second day for it to be open. Right. And the waiter can come over and say, have you ever eaten here before? I always say, yes.
I've Had It
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I do too. Is this your first time? Nope. Nope. I do not want to go through all of that. And I think that all of this stems from these roundtable meetings where we're scrambling jets, we're circling back, we're putting stuff in the parking lot, taking it out. And somebody's like, I have a great idea. Let's expand the experience and let's ask the diner if they've ever been here before.
I've Had It
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And then we can allow the waiter to tell them the history of the restaurant. And I have a hot news flash. You need to put that back in the parking lot. Turn the jets over to Trump's FAA because this is a bad idea. This is a bad, bad, bad idea. Nobody, nobody, nobody wants to hear this shit. Now, I take that back. There are some people that like a lot of this chitchat. They do.
I've Had It
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If you refer to a couple of episodes ago, we presented concrete evidence, a study that we found on Instagram. Right. But it's very concrete because then we aired it. Right. And it confirms our own beliefs. that people who dislike small talk have higher IQs. So dumb people like this. And if you want dumb diners, then you go ahead and do that.
I've Had It
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But if you want smart diners, and I would think smart diners probably leave better tips because they know how to calculate the percentage for the tip. Right. Absolutely. Yeah. I just, here's the thing.
I've Had It
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Give me my check. Let's fucking go. I oftentimes really try to do everything I can do to avoid hearing the specials. Agree. I scour the menu and I think I want to find something on this menu so I do not have to hear the description of what the specials are for the day.
I've Had It
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And so if I find something on the menu and like if I'm with you and you and I will both find something on the menu, Josh is the same way because we're all firm believers and executors of the dining shotgun method. And they're like, would you like to hear our specials today? Nope. Already ready to order.
I've Had It
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The number one thing to do, this is the clutch move of all clutch moves, is when the waiter comes over, drops silverware, and they're like, what can I get you to drink? You have to immediately intervene and say, we're actually ready to place the whole order. Always. Always. Okay, I'll tell you what. This just reminded me of another great habit.
I've Had It
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And I see that it's Brigham Young University, which that was lost on me when I saw the original viral reel. And then... I'm like, then I go to his stories and I'm like, oh, he's an out of the closet gay man. And I thought in my mind, former Mormon. Of course. He's about to spill the tea on Mormonism. And much to my surprise, it was about how to be a gay Mormon. Can you be a gay Mormon? He is.
I've Had It
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Absolutely not. We're ordering immediately. The problem with asking with more time is just how vague that statement is. The waiter then subjectively can assume that's 10 to 15 minutes. And or could assume it's one to two minutes and they come back over and they're like, we told you we need more time. And then whoever's doing this when you're out with other diners, like I make a very big point.
I've Had It
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Like if this is my menu, you know, here's my menu for those watching. I make a very big point to close it very dramatically. Right. And set it down. Put it away. Like that I'm ready to order. So my fellow diners that I typically don't dine with know that I'm not fucking around. Right. You're signaling. I'm signaling. A nonverbal signal.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
But now, you know, the great, the beautiful thing about getting older is now I just say, if like I'm going to lunch or dinner with somebody that I don't typically dine with, I just put my hand over and I am starving. So we need to order ASA. We've got to hurry. I just, I just go ahead and advocate for myself right at the top of the meal. I think that's a great idea. It's a great way to handle it.
I've Had It
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Stick with us for more hot takes. Because we're lifestyle coaches. We are dining coaches. You know what? I mean, we really are good at dining. We are so fucking efficient. Okay. Okay. Aside from your, I mean, hit legal firm, Me Mom, Me Curtain Law. Right. We could have the donning of a beaver coaching services. How about restaurant coaching services with coach Angela Dawn Beaver? No, here we go.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
teach you how to eat beaver like we're the beavers we're gonna teach you how to eat beaver we're gonna be restaurant coaches oh my god all right this is this is descended into chaos as always um potty humor which is our default setting um my apologies and please subscribe send us voice memos to our instagram they're fantastic um
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Make sure you post mean stuff on the internet about the Trump administration. Troll the shit out of these people. Create burner accounts. Troll the shit out of these people. Fuck with them. Go hard in the paint. Don't take your foot off the gas. Pumps tell them. We will see you next Tuesday and Thursday. Listen up, patriots, gaytriots, and natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped.
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It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20-minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America, always served with a side of petty grievances.
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we are on all the available platforms apple spotify google whatever you get your podcast and youtube please go rate subscribe and review so that we will chart upwards with america's greatest legal mind pumps and pumps what does an eagle say caca a little bit more enthusiasm that's it that's that's that's the patriotism that this country needs right there
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
He's a gay Mormon. But I mean, I don't know. I mean, based on the evidence that I've seen on this Mormon TikTok fuckery where these kids are tortured over like one of them was like, kill your grandma or have a sip of vodka. Right. And they're like, just go ahead and kill my grandmother. I'm like, you warmonger, sociopath, cult people, like how is this university open? How is this a place?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
How are they proud of this? Like if my child ever said something like that, I would think I really have failed miserably at everything in my life. And they're proud of these answers. Right. I was going to say, their parents look at that and think, I have just raised the greatest Mormon of all time. Killing the grandmother versus a sip of vodka, good for you.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And I feel so sad for these Mormon kids because, you know, they should be sipping vodka, having sex, making bad choices, because that's part of the college experience. And I'm sure that there's some pearl-clutching Mormons right now listening to this going... Oh, my God. And it's like, listen, you only live one time.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And college is the time where you get to go have sex, experiment with drugs, make bad choices, figure out who you are. And then adulthood comes raining down on you. But to be like this whole idea that you're planning your whole life for, what do they call it? The magical kingdom? Celestial. Okay. What a racket. Oh, and they have so much money.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
That's a racket. That's a total, total racket, which let me tell you what I've had it with. Okay. Triple Trumpers. And listener, let me tell you what a triple Trumper is. A triple Trumper is an American citizen that voted not once, not twice, but three times for Donald Trump.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Yes. And I've had it with these triple Trumpers. I am convinced beyond a shadow of a doubt that the triple Trumpers are the biggest threat to democracies worldwide.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Here's the situation. You have agency as an adult to what news you consume. And I have to, for this other podcast, Pumps and I have to, for our political podcast, IHIP News, I have to be very aware of what's going on in the 24-hour news cycle. And oftentimes I see some clickbait headline and I click it because, you know, it's juicy and it ropes me in.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
But after I read it and it makes an extraordinary claim, I then vet that claim because I have agency and I'm not a fucking imbecile and I want to make sure that I know the facts. Triple Trumpers are intellectually lazy and they like to feast on hate. They love it. They want hate for their appetizer, hate for their entree, hate for their dessert, and hate for their middle of the night snack.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Because I sometimes go over to Fox News and I think, I want to see how they're spinning this. I'm only able to watch it for three to four minutes because it is so insulting to my intelligence. It is so breathtakingly anti-intellectual. It is this red meat served up for dumb people. To reinforce their stupid bias. It is a stupid confirmation bias. And triple Trumpers, you have agency.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And if you think that a trust fund baby like Donald Trump, who has failed. at marriage, at business, at managing the COVID epidemic. We can get into him bribing Zelensky and all this other crazy shit that he did. Fell in love with Kim Jong-un, said that, his words. They fell in love, write each other love letters. And you think this guy isn't going to dick you over? You're one dumb motherfucker.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Right. That's why my empathy problem, I'm coming up short. Right. Here's how I – here's the reach around for the empathy problem. I personally don't have that much empathy for these people. But my voting record covers them.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Okay, what I've had it with... is door to door solicitations for services. Why do we both sound slightly drunk today? I can't say solicitation. I said patriots. You're like solicitations.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
My voting record will make sure that even dumb shits, dipshits that sit around and watch Fox News and go to their evangelical megachurch and wonder why their preacher is so rich when he takes Venmo – You know, my vote ensures that if they lose their jobs, they will have unemployment benefits.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
If they are fired by a bunch of billionaires and they don't have health care and they get cancer, that they can access Medicaid. If you served in the armed forces and you get PTSD, that there's going to be a veterans affair.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Also, my vote also ensures that we have air traffic controllers that make sure your plane doesn't get fucking crashed into by a United States military helicopter like it does in Trump's America. So that's my reach around for that. My vote covers my personal inability to have empathy for these dipshits because they're so intellectually lazy. My vote covers them. That's a great way to put it.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And my reach around. I feel better. Yeah, I do. I feel better because that's exactly right. Yep. All right. Welcome to America's Top DEI Podcast. I'm Jennifer and my co-host, as everybody knows, is Angela D. Beaver, the donning of a beaver. She is leading this democracy with our new mascot, the beaver. The beaver. Yes. Hi. Or me, Ma Drag. I do kind of like that.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
How are you? I'm good. How are you? I'm really, really, really good. I'm just doing some mild, light Trump bashing there. I find it very cathartic.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I feel like a release. Yeah, call them dipshits, you dumb fucks. God, that's therapeutic. And I do think intellectually lazy, intellectually lazy dipshits. But it's the perfect description. Yeah, they are. I mean, you know... I'm just telling you, Fox News is an IQ decreaser.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Have they just gotten dumber working there? It's a it's a show. It's an entertainment. I mean, it's an entertainment. It's not news. It's it's entertainment. It's an entertainment channel. OK, Kylie, what's going on in the Internet?
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Matthew, I have to tell you, when we were on our DEI podcasting tour, the Hot Shit Tour, we have this like meet and greet after the show. And a lot of Gaytriots reveled in bringing me Stanley Caps. But there was one Gaytriot in particular. And for those of you longtime listeners, you will remember when somebody called me a centrist. Wow.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And I was just – I mean, it took me about five or six episodes to unravel out of it. No, it was weeks. They called me, you know, you're ugly. You look like a trans man and, you know, all this, which I don't find that insulting. But, you know, all of this from these conservatives, it just bounces right off. I don't think anything of it. But when I was called a centrist, it really bothered me.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
And so these two gaytriots brought me a shirt that said proud centrist. Wow. In the ultimate troll. Revved you right up again. And I mean, and they were dying. They gave it to me and they were dying laughing. Yeah. The centrist, that really bothered me. Yeah. Because the centrist, that's so intellectually lazy. That's like, I'm going to be just safe. I'm a moderate. I'm a centrist.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Fucking dig deep. Claw in. This is Trump's America. Pick a side. You have to try harder. Quit trying to get everybody to like you. Quit being a pick me centrist. I've had it. Okay, I just want to make one comment to Millennial Matthew.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
Millennial Matthew, we need more like you. Pumps, that is a great point because, you know, We do like to talk about sometimes there are people out there right now with ear pods in their ears that just listen. Maybe they never miss an episode, but they've never gone public with it. They are closet podcast listeners. And Matthew has, I mean, he's breaking out of the closet, hinges flying off. Right.
I've Had It
Failed Trust Fund Baby
I'm going to leave a review if it kills me. And I do. I like you. I appreciate Millennial Matthew and that effort. That's what, that's the kind of leadership this country needs right now.