Alan Thicke

I'm not sitting here in my shorts, but I have a beautiful thong that you might be interested in right under my speedo here. I'm in the lap of luxury in Santa Barbara.

I'm not sitting here in my shorts, but I have a beautiful thong that you might be interested in right under my speedo here. I'm in the lap of luxury in Santa Barbara.

Who the hell is that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we can't do that.

Who the hell is that? Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we can't do that.

What I can do is I can go back to my area of sports expertise, which is the UC Santa Barbara women's water polo team. And I can report on them regularly. They have beautiful uniforms and everything. Well, that seems like an awful idea. That's synchronized swimming with an attitude, and I can keep you up to date with their activity. You've got Sochi coming up.

What I can do is I can go back to my area of sports expertise, which is the UC Santa Barbara women's water polo team. And I can report on them regularly. They have beautiful uniforms and everything. Well, that seems like an awful idea. That's synchronized swimming with an attitude, and I can keep you up to date with their activity. You've got Sochi coming up.

You know I'll be all over that, including I will never be stumped again by a Thomas Hurdle reference.

You know I'll be all over that, including I will never be stumped again by a Thomas Hurdle reference.

Oh, yeah, yeah. He scored, what, four goals? Has he scored any since?

Oh, yeah, yeah. He scored, what, four goals? Has he scored any since?

That's what he just said.

That's what he just said.

The Mrs. World pageant in Russia. And my wife was helping. I was hosting. She was going to crown the winner. There was a language barrier there. And we announced the right winner. But the assistant went and grabbed the crown, put it on the wrong winner. And you never said this was like the Bolshevik Revolution. The place went nuts. It got very ugly for a minute, but I was impeccable.

The Mrs. World pageant in Russia. And my wife was helping. I was hosting. She was going to crown the winner. There was a language barrier there. And we announced the right winner. But the assistant went and grabbed the crown, put it on the wrong winner. And you never said this was like the Bolshevik Revolution. The place went nuts. It got very ugly for a minute, but I was impeccable.

My contribution was perfect. And by the way, they had to retape the whole ending of the show. This is after the confetti comes out and the girls are crying and people are celebrating. And they said, oops, wait a minute. Now they had to redo the entire 10 minutes of the show. It was not a live broadcast.

My contribution was perfect. And by the way, they had to retape the whole ending of the show. This is after the confetti comes out and the girls are crying and people are celebrating. And they said, oops, wait a minute. Now they had to redo the entire 10 minutes of the show. It was not a live broadcast.

Was it like a hometown loss or a hometown— No, we—Mrs. Russia actually won, and everybody knew it because that's the way they do things in Russia. Right. Oh, so— Okay, so—

Was it like a hometown loss or a hometown— No, we—Mrs. Russia actually won, and everybody knew it because that's the way they do things in Russia. Right. Oh, so— Okay, so—

Well, first of all, it wasn't even fair. Well, they put the crown on, you know, Mrs. Uzbekistan or somebody who wasn't even part of the Soviet Union. You know, a total foreigner. And then it wasn't even fair because it was a Mrs. World competition and Mrs. Russia was like 19 and Mrs. Uzbekistan was, you know, B. Arthur. So... It was just all so obvious. It was rigged?

Well, first of all, it wasn't even fair. Well, they put the crown on, you know, Mrs. Uzbekistan or somebody who wasn't even part of the Soviet Union. You know, a total foreigner. And then it wasn't even fair because it was a Mrs. World competition and Mrs. Russia was like 19 and Mrs. Uzbekistan was, you know, B. Arthur. So... It was just all so obvious. It was rigged?

When they snatched that tiara and put it on the wrong woman, there were... Wait a minute. Like a Siberian tiger was let out of the...

When they snatched that tiara and put it on the wrong woman, there were... Wait a minute. Like a Siberian tiger was let out of the...