Adair

She's like, ah! Look at that, and that's a turtle.

She's like, ah! Look at that, and that's a turtle.

She's like, me too. You know, turtles drive pickup trucks.

She's like, me too. You know, turtles drive pickup trucks.

Yeah, it's pretty cool.

Yeah, it's pretty cool.

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And Adair's like, I like things and writing.

And Adair's like, I like things and writing.

And like, oh my God, what is it? What the fuck is it?

And like, oh my God, what is it? What the fuck is it?

So Adair's like, Captain, Captain Adair, I'm off on the tender, headed to the marina.

So Adair's like, Captain, Captain Adair, I'm off on the tender, headed to the marina.

Ah! I really don't know what's going on. What are you trying to say to me? You have to give me a little bit more context.

Ah! I really don't know what's going on. What are you trying to say to me? You have to give me a little bit more context.

Oh, they rhyme. Yeah, I got that. I know about that. Okay, back to work.

Oh, they rhyme. Yeah, I got that. I know about that. Okay, back to work.

How can there be more to it? I used to date a guy named Bill and I also dated another guy named Will. It was the most confusing shit I ever heard in my life. Is that what's happening to you? Yeah, one time I was texting a guy named Bob and a guy named Rob. Turned out they're the same person. How does someone named Bob... How do they have two different nicknames? Bob and Rob.

How can there be more to it? I used to date a guy named Bill and I also dated another guy named Will. It was the most confusing shit I ever heard in my life. Is that what's happening to you? Yeah, one time I was texting a guy named Bob and a guy named Rob. Turned out they're the same person. How does someone named Bob... How do they have two different nicknames? Bob and Rob.

Why don't you choose one? You know what I'm saying?

Why don't you choose one? You know what I'm saying?

What the fuck? Turns out Bill and Will are also the same nickname. What the hell?

What the fuck? Turns out Bill and Will are also the same nickname. What the hell?

Oh, God, I was so confused when I watched The Hobbit. I was like, Bilbo Baggins, that's like half the guys I just dated.

Oh, God, I was so confused when I watched The Hobbit. I was like, Bilbo Baggins, that's like half the guys I just dated.

He's like, no, no, you won't make me feel... I come from the world of mudding.

He's like, no, no, you won't make me feel... I come from the world of mudding.

Oh, thanks. You know, well, we still have a lot of time to go slow, so let's go slow.

Oh, thanks. You know, well, we still have a lot of time to go slow, so let's go slow.

Stupid puss.

Stupid puss.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

No! Swing that jet ski back around the corner there, please.

No! Swing that jet ski back around the corner there, please.

Yeah, I showered and washed my hair. It was real nice. I was trying to get more mud into it, honestly, but I couldn't do it.

Yeah, I showered and washed my hair. It was real nice. I was trying to get more mud into it, honestly, but I couldn't do it.

I thought I do, but I don't know. I don't know how well that's working out for me. I mean, this is probably time for me to switch it up. She's like, what's your type? I don't know, like a redneck vibe.

I thought I do, but I don't know. I don't know how well that's working out for me. I mean, this is probably time for me to switch it up. She's like, what's your type? I don't know, like a redneck vibe.

Yeah, exactly like that. That's perfect. I love that.

Yeah, exactly like that. That's perfect. I love that.

Yeah, that's perfect. That sounds like the dream. Sweat stains, bald hair, booger rockets, you know, typical guy.

Yeah, that's perfect. That sounds like the dream. Sweat stains, bald hair, booger rockets, you know, typical guy.

Hey, you ever see Panic Room? Remember how Dwight Yoakam looked in that movie? That was so fucking hot.

Hey, you ever see Panic Room? Remember how Dwight Yoakam looked in that movie? That was so fucking hot.

She's like, oh, I see your inner thigh hair, and I couldn't even imagine eating my cake and turning over and having that silver crotch in my face. No, thank you.

She's like, oh, I see your inner thigh hair, and I couldn't even imagine eating my cake and turning over and having that silver crotch in my face. No, thank you.

Can you include something that involves ducks and dynasties?

Can you include something that involves ducks and dynasties?

So, you know, I'm going to give him that slow treatment like middle school. First, you're going to walk the hallway with each other.

So, you know, I'm going to give him that slow treatment like middle school. First, you're going to walk the hallway with each other.

As opposed to like Lisa Rinna being like, never have I ever gone to a Kurt Lagerfeld show.

As opposed to like Lisa Rinna being like, never have I ever gone to a Kurt Lagerfeld show.

And then Adair's like, I'm not playing these games with y'all. You're all too fucking berserk. It's going to rain. I'm going to go inside, guys.

And then Adair's like, I'm not playing these games with y'all. You're all too fucking berserk. It's going to rain. I'm going to go inside, guys.

No! Four-wheelers, you fucking pussy! What are we supposed to do? Go on a date?

No! Four-wheelers, you fucking pussy! What are we supposed to do? Go on a date?

Question. Since we're in Europe, do they got one of those big dinosaurs made of cars that eats other cars? Like, maybe Pujols, since we're here?

Question. Since we're in Europe, do they got one of those big dinosaurs made of cars that eats other cars? Like, maybe Pujols, since we're here?

So, you know, I'm going to give him that slow treatment like middle school. First, you're going to walk the hallway with each other.

As opposed to like Lisa Rinna being like, never have I ever gone to a Kurt Lagerfeld show.

And then Adair's like, I'm not playing these games with y'all. You're all too fucking berserk. It's going to rain. I'm going to go inside, guys.

No! Four-wheelers, you fucking pussy! What are we supposed to do? Go on a date?

Question. Since we're in Europe, do they got one of those big dinosaurs made of cars that eats other cars? Like, maybe Pujols, since we're here?

She's like, ah! Look at that, and that's a turtle.

She's like, me too. You know, turtles drive pickup trucks.

Yeah, it's pretty cool.

.

.

.

.

.

, .

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

And Adair's like, I like things and writing.

And like, oh my God, what is it? What the fuck is it?

So Adair's like, Captain, Captain Adair, I'm off on the tender, headed to the marina.

Ah! I really don't know what's going on. What are you trying to say to me? You have to give me a little bit more context.

Oh, they rhyme. Yeah, I got that. I know about that. Okay, back to work.

How can there be more to it? I used to date a guy named Bill and I also dated another guy named Will. It was the most confusing shit I ever heard in my life. Is that what's happening to you? Yeah, one time I was texting a guy named Bob and a guy named Rob. Turned out they're the same person. How does someone named Bob... How do they have two different nicknames? Bob and Rob.

Why don't you choose one? You know what I'm saying?

What the fuck? Turns out Bill and Will are also the same nickname. What the hell?

Oh, God, I was so confused when I watched The Hobbit. I was like, Bilbo Baggins, that's like half the guys I just dated.

He's like, no, no, you won't make me feel... I come from the world of mudding.

Oh, thanks. You know, well, we still have a lot of time to go slow, so let's go slow.

Stupid puss.

Oh, God.

No! Swing that jet ski back around the corner there, please.

Yeah, I showered and washed my hair. It was real nice. I was trying to get more mud into it, honestly, but I couldn't do it.

I thought I do, but I don't know. I don't know how well that's working out for me. I mean, this is probably time for me to switch it up. She's like, what's your type? I don't know, like a redneck vibe.

Yeah, exactly like that. That's perfect. I love that.

Yeah, that's perfect. That sounds like the dream. Sweat stains, bald hair, booger rockets, you know, typical guy.

Hey, you ever see Panic Room? Remember how Dwight Yoakam looked in that movie? That was so fucking hot.

She's like, oh, I see your inner thigh hair, and I couldn't even imagine eating my cake and turning over and having that silver crotch in my face. No, thank you.

Can you include something that involves ducks and dynasties?