Best-selling author, speaker, and podcast host Gretchen Rubin explains why rewards are dangerous (but treats are good) when creating habits.Hear Gretchen's full interview in Episode 83 of The Action Catalyst.
You have an opinion on using rewards and incentives and treats. What's your philosophy on how rewards fit into having good habits? Well, rewards are very, very dangerous when it comes to habits. Whoa. They're very dangerous. And so you have to distinguish between a reward and a treat. Treats are good. Rewards are very dangerous. So a treat is something that you get just because you want it.
You don't earn it. You don't deserve it. You just want it. So you get it. And we should really load ourselves with healthy treats because when we give ourselves treats, we feel comforted and taken care of. And our battery gets energized. And so that gives us more self-command. And we want our self-command to be as high as possible. We want self-control.
We want willpower to be – we want those reserves to be very high. And when you do those little things for yourself, whether it's doing a cluster puzzle on your iPad or buying yourself new music on iTunes or, you know, whatever it might be, people have all different treats, then that's good. Now, there are unhealthy treats, which are like food and drink.
You don't want to do something to make yourself feel better that's going to end up making you feel worse. So treats are good because they boost our self-mastery and they keep us from getting into that dangerous land of feeling deprived. I need it. I've earned it. I should get this. That's when we start giving ourselves unhealthy treats. I need this.
Rewards are bad because the reason that habits are superpowers is is that they get inside of the dangerous, draining, difficult job of using decision-making and using willpower. If it's a habit, it just happens automatically. You don't have to think about it. You don't have to judge it. You just do it automatically. I do not decide to wake up at 6 a.m. I do not decide whether to take dessert.
I just know. And that happens automatically. It doesn't take anything from me. And so that frees up my mind and it frees me from having to use my self-control because It doesn't take any health control. I know exactly what I'm going to do and I do it. A reward, though, always requires a decision. Have you earned your reward?
And that interferes with a habit because I'm saying, well, if I run, I get to have a beer. Well, I ran half today. Do I get a beer? But I hurt my foot, so I really couldn't run, but I still want the beer. Do I get the beer? I'm on vacation. Who could run? I should get the beer. And then sometimes what happens is you make a habit of reward, and the habit itself falls away.
If you have a beer every night, because you got used to that, but you're not even running. But they're also bad because when you give yourself a reward, you're telling yourself that you're only doing something in order to get the reward. So you're undermining intrinsic motivation because you're giving yourself an extrinsic motivation. So you're saying, well, this is why I'm doing it.
And with a habit, you want it to just happen automatically. You don't want to be judging it. And you don't want to give it a negative association. Like you want to do it because you want to do it. And if you're rewarding it, then you're just teaching yourself that it's something that you wouldn't otherwise do. When also often we give ourselves perverse rewards.
We give ourselves rewards that exactly contradict whatever we want. Like my friend said, the minute I lose 10 pounds, I'm going to have a big piece of chocolate cake. The one kind of reward that is good is a reward that takes you deeper into the habit. So let's say you're doing a lot of yoga. You would buy yourself a new yoga mat because the person who does a lot of yoga needs a new yoga mat.
Or let's say you're doing a lot of work on a side project and so you buy a new fancy laptop because the person who's doing all this extra work needs technologic support. That makes sense. I talked to one company that had a really smart reward, which was that if you exercise 75 times in a year, you got the next year free. So the reward for exercise was more exercise.
So that's a reward that's taking you deeper into the habit. It's not irrelevant to the habit or actually undermining the habit. It's just making it easier for you to do the habit and more pleasant. And that's good because the easier and more pleasant, more convenient it is to do a habit, the more likely we are to stick to it. That's my strategy of convenience.
But you don't want a reward that's not related to it or that actually pushes you in the opposite direction. So rewards are dangerous. They're tempting. It's a tempting solution, but I think it's often counterproductive when it comes to habits.