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There's a certain kind of magic and energy that happens inside of that. And it definitely was that for us. But yeah, we just kept like, okay, let's try this thing. And now let's do this. And even building a team inside of a business that didn't exist before, like you couldn't call someone or look online and go, well, how do you build a lifestyle website? How do you hire editors?

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How do you hire a photographer? We were making it up as we went along for sure.

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Yeah, for sure. Again, these things are common now. Back then it wasn't a thing, but I had just run the LA Marathon and to celebrate, I went with my then husband to Mexico. We were on a beach in Mexico and I was wearing a bathing suit that I thought was really cute. And I had a following on Facebook, but maybe 10,000 people. It wasn't huge at all.

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And I was like, oh, they'll like this bathing suit because the bathing suit was monogrammed. And I was like, oh, I'm going to show them. And it was a bikini. And I asked my husband at the time, I was like, oh, can you take a picture of me in this bikini? And he took a few pictures. And then I went to the pool and I was looking through the photos.

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And in all the photos, you could see my stretch marks pretty predominantly. And I was like, oh, I don't know. Maybe I'm not going to post this. And I was like, oh, who cares? Everyone who follows me is a mom like me. They probably have stretch marks too. They're still going to love this bathing suit. I'm just going to write about how I didn't want to post it because of these stretch marks.

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And I will never forget this, that I posted it. I was on crappy Wi-Fi. So I went, I did like a refresh to make sure that it had posted. And when I refreshed it, it had a hundred likes. Now that doesn't seem like a big deal, but I am telling you, I'd never gotten more than eight likes on something in my entire life. And I was like, holy crap, a hundred likes, this is nuts.

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And then I like refreshed it again and it had like a thousand likes. And I was like, what is going on? And over the course of that day, I just remember sitting by a pool, refreshing and just watching it go and get bigger and bigger. And I probably had 10,000 followers on Facebook. And by the end of the day, I had like a hundred thousand.

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I'll tell you what too, Hala, if you're going to have something go viral, That's not the thing you want to go viral. It's not yourself in a bikini, like not feeling like the best version of you. But that taught me so much because of the response from women to that post. I was like, oh, women really want to talk about things that are real.

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Because this was the era of the Pinterest birthday party and everything had to be perfect and our kids needed to look amazing. And I was like, oh, women really want to talk about real things. So that honestly, I think, planted the seed of what Girl, Wash Your Face would become, which was, can we have a real conversation about what this really feels like? Yes, sometimes it's beautiful.

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And yes, sometimes it's not. And our lives are all of it. So can we hold space for all of that?

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Yeah, I just, I got so much attention for that post. I didn't really know what to do with it, to be honest with you. But it was, in retrospect, just a really great jumping off point of what my career and my writing style would become.

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Yeah. I feel like a grandma when I'm saying this to you, but when all of these new websites came around, so let's say Pinterest is a great example. We learned very quickly as content creators that there was an aesthetic that would get you more noticed, that people really, they wanted the blowout. They wanted full hair and makeup.

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The audience wanted perfect, perfect, perfect, because they never really had a website to see that before. And now you could look up anything on Pinterest and find the most aesthetically pleasing version of that. And we all started to chase that visual ideal, not just in the work we created, but in our lives.

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So I think it was just right for this opportunity for some women to kind of raise their hand and go like, yeah, but that's not always what it looks like. Some days I feel like I look that pretty, but other days that's just not reality. And so if we can show up as our real selves, how would that be?

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I think there's such a better balance of it today because you have creators who are creating on both sides of that spectrum. You have stunningly beautiful doing makeup tutorials. And then you have people who are like, oh, I... I haven't taken a shower in four days and I'm struggling with mental health and this is where I am. And it allows people to see themselves.

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I went from being on top of the world and having this massively successful company to slowly having to lay people off. And by mid 2021, this business I had spent so many years building up to came crashing down.

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Oh my gosh, this is like asking what is my favorite child. I think honestly the biggest shift that happened for me about 15 years ago was understanding what a morning routine was and the value of creating one around not just what I wanted to achieve, but the season of life that I am in. I think there's so much content out there telling you how to build a morning routine.

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I had the opportunity to meet an author I really loved and admired in Jen Hatmaker. And she was so many of us, like, oh, we all just like were obsessed with her. And I got to meet her and I was fangirling so hard. And she asked me a question that truly changed the course of my life. She was like, oh, what's the next book you're writing? And I was like, oh, oh my gosh.

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Okay, well, because I was writing fiction and I was telling her all about this fiction that I was writing. And she said, no, God, no, not that. What's the story of your heart? What's the thing you would say to women if you could say anything? And I truly did not know that I had an answer to that question. I just started word vomiting all over her.

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I was like, oh, I just, I wish that women knew how powerful they were. And I wish they knew they could stand up and go again. And I wish they knew they could take ownership of their life. And it's like, girl, like, please get it together. Stop crying, girl. And so I just kept saying like, girl, and she was like, oh, right, girl, wash your face. Yeah. And I was like, oh my, that, that.

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And I left that conversation with her that we were on a trip together. I left that conversation and wrote the first chapter of what would become Girl, Wash Your Face in the aftermath of our chat. And so the idea that someone could ask you a question that completely shifts the way you see yourself or your work, oh my gosh, it's so incredibly powerful.

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Honestly, it feels like a really beautiful bookend to Girl, Wash Your Face, to be honest. When you have the kind of success that I had with that book, everyone wants you to just keep writing that book. They're like, do it again, do it again, do it again. And I've just gotten to the place in my life and my career where I don't want to tell anybody else how to live.

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When I wrote Girl, Wash Your Face, I was like, I have all of your answers. I know exactly what you should do. And the older I get, the more I understand that everyone's on their own journey. And without context into someone else's lived experience, you can't really offer great advice.

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But I have had those moments and I have had those prompts and those questions where someone gave me a bit of wisdom that utterly changed the way I saw myself. So I thought, well, could I share some of the framework that I've used to figure out my own path and my own answers?

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So instead of a book of my answers, it's a book of my questions so that you can form your own answers to wherever you are or whatever's going on for you.

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And it's really easy to start to gather information and not really take that on board in what will work for you. So if you are a new parent with a new baby at home, your life and your ability to wake up in the morning is going to look very different than if you are a freelancer in your 20s.

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I think this audience will really identify with the fact that at the beginning of 2020, I had a staff of 60 people. I had a massive business that was based on live events. I threw conferences for women to work on personal development and we were crushing it. We're absolutely crushing it. And when into 2020... So freaking pumped, so excited.

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We did an event in January of 2020 in Florida that was like 6,000 people for three days. We were like, here we go, let's do it. March, very first week of March, 2020, we did an event in Toronto. It was our first international conference, absolutely crushed it.

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And I remember at that conference, we started to hear about this thing that was happening in China and people were getting sick and we were like, wow, this is wild. By the time I got back to Austin, which is where I lived at the time, the world was shutting down. And like most people, we were like, okay, I guess we'll work from home for a couple weeks and then we'll be back.

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And obviously that's not what happened, but probably one of the worst businesses you could be in in 2020 was live events. So I went from being on top of the world and having this massively successful company to slowly having to lay people off. And by mid-2021, just everything had shut down. I just had taken my staff back to, I think, four or five people.

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And the podcast really became the core of my business. But this business I had spent so many years building up to came crashing down. And I know your audience is going to get this too. So much of that business was me. That's how I saw myself. It was my identity. I had a massive ego death, like so many things happened.

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But that, so the business collapsing, I went through a really bad divorce in 2020. And just, it felt kind of like one thing had stacked on top of another. And in 2020, 20, oh gosh, it's all running together in my mind. Within the last couple of years, my ex-husband, my children's father passed away unexpectedly.

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And that was sort of just getting your head back above water and then life kicks the crap out of you again. And I know I'm not the only one who has that story either. I know that so many people have their version of getting sick or losing someone they love or getting fired or trying to figure it out. And I think it affects us all in different ways. But for me...

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So for me, really understanding the importance of that time, like I have four kids, so waking up before my kids wake up, I know it sounds so simple, but if you start your day on offense versus on defense, it makes all the difference. So waking up before anyone else in the house, having my coffee, I sit in the same spot every single day. I read nonfiction. I do a gratitude practice.

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there's just so much psychologically tied up in all of it. And there are times where I've felt like, why am I working so hard? Why am I trying to build this? Why am I trying to do this thing if it can like go away that fast? And then other times where I'm like, oh, we've worked too hard to like give up now. So it's sort of vastly between both of those things. But

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I really wanted to write about that lived experience because that's my trauma. But I guarantee people listening to this have way worse stories that they could tell and way harder things that they've lived through. There's some solace in understanding you're not the only one who maybe had to fight hard to get themselves going today. But by God, we're here.

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And we're doing it and we're showing up as the very best that we can with what we've got. And hopefully it gets a little bit easier as we go along. We start to get some momentum and then we can do some really great work.

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be going through a rough patch in their entrepreneurship? That is such a good question. And I love that you're wise enough to ask that, Hala. If you're listening to this and you're like, I am crushing it. I can do no wrong. Because there was a time where I was like, we're just doing all the things. This is working.

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One thing, and you kind of mentioned this already, is anybody who has a business that is audience-based and you access that audience through someone else's business, you need to be really careful. So I told you guys that, you know, I had the website and we built Facebook pages. which sounds so antiquated now, but that was the means to access an audience back in the day.

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And Russell, you mentioned Russell Brunson, he has his own version of this story of you build up this massive audience and then one day the company you access them through changes And now you don't have access anymore. So I remember with Facebook, we killed ourselves building up an audience and getting people to join that page.

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And then one day you posted something and it literally would say underneath your posts, 3% of your followers saw this post. If you'd like to access more of your followers, boost your post. Paying for Facebook ads is so normal now, but there was a time where you did not have to pay to access the audience. The same thing happens when an algorithm changes. The same thing happens as podcasters.

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You know this. iOS did an update a year and a half ago that completely changed. Yes, it completely changed the way that our audience can access our content. And it really makes you aware of how vulnerable you are if you access your fan base or your audience through someone else's business. So yes, I've had an email since I had a blog.

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So 300,000 people, 60% open rate because I have sent her an email every Sunday for 15 years. And I very rarely use that audience I don't monetize it. I don't sell access to them. I just utilize it so that if I'm launching something like a new book, I know that I can speak directly to my fan base without having to pay an advertising fee. So be aware of how you access everybody.

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That's super important. Be aware that I'm going to sound so ridiculous right now, but just real talk. The bigger that you get... everyone's like, this is amazing, this is amazing, this is amazing. And like one day people are like, I don't like this anymore. Especially if you are a woman. Straight up real talk. You hit a point, everyone's rooting for you and they're so proud of what you're doing.

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I do those things that are really paramount to what I am trying to accomplish in my life right now. But that's not something I understood I needed a long time ago. So I know that's kind of like a bigger scope, but building that morning routine around your life and your goals is the key.

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And all of a sudden it's like, wait a minute, something's wrong here. So I wish that I had understood everything that you have to tread lightly. I think you have to be a little bit paranoid when you hit higher levels of success because I tend to be such a Pollyanna and I'm just like, everyone's amazing, everyone's kind, the world is beautiful. And it is, and also it's not.

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So that's where diversifying how you get your revenue is really important. Like you said, if one stream goes away, you know you've got another. But yeah, I just wish I had been a little bit more like a mobster or something. Just like a little bit more like, who's going to get me? Yeah, like I know that that sounds so dramatic, but honestly...

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I think that as women in business, particularly for building a company, particularly as you grow bigger and bigger, I honestly probably would have talked about my success less.

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I thought if I share what we're doing, if I share how many people are employed at this company and they have 401ks and health insurance, and like if I share what we're doing, that will inspire other women to build businesses as well. But the more that I talked about success, the more it seemed to upset people.

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And I wish I had been a bit more protective of what we were doing and the kind of numbers that we do. And now I don't talk about any of that at all. I used to think, Hala, I was like, why doesn't Oprah? Why doesn't Sarah Blakely? Why doesn't Reese Witherspoon? These women are billionaires with a B. Why aren't they talking about their entrepreneurial success? And now I'm like,

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Because the world doesn't like it when women succeed at that level. And if you want to keep succeeding at a certain level, I think that the way that it is acceptable is to be demure and not admit your success. And maybe that's very pessimistic, but that's what I would say to you.

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Seriously. It's so innocent when we do it. It really is so innocent. You're like, holy crap, this team has worked our butts off. We got to tell people we're doing this stuff. But it puts a target on your back. It really does. And I think... I hate that it's the case because I don't think it's the same for men who are entrepreneurs and who are building like people are inspired by that.

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But it's also like this is the game as it exists today. I hope it's not the same when my daughter gets older, but this is the game. And so if you want to play the game and you want to succeed at the highest levels, you have to understand what's going to allow you to keep doing that.

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And I know that there are people who get really frustrated by that because you're like, no, you should break the glass ceiling and speak out against this. And it's like, yes, but also there's a point at which that trying to do that starts to go in opposition of what you're trying to achieve as an entrepreneur. Just hold space for that as you're building this massive thing.

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Right, right. Yeah. We do it too because women are so often underestimated in business. So we want to say, oh, but wait, I've built an eight-figure company. I have 60 employees. Like I've done these because you want to like legitimize yourself. But then simultaneously, I think people just the framework is they tend to hear that as bragging and you're not trying to brag.

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You're more just trying to share your story. But yeah, I just think. Oh, I feel like such a like cheesy, but like be careful, be thoughtful.

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Gosh, first of all, you're not alone. That's so many people. But I think that if you're feeling like that right now, you really need to study more successful entrepreneurs. Because if you study more successful entrepreneurs, you're going to find failures at the greatest, most massive levels. I promise you failures that are way bigger than what you've just gone through.

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And the people whose names we know, it's because they stood up and went again. I sat down with Alex Hormozy a month or two ago, and he was talking about how many times he's failed. And if you follow his journey at all, you hear all these stories. It's like four times he's had these massive failures where he's been not just failed, but someone else has taken all of his money kind of thing. Yeah.

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Where it would be so easy to get so bitter about that and to be like, see, like people are bad. The world's out to get me. I'll never succeed. And I asked him, I'm like, how on earth do you stand back up and go again when this happens for the fourth time? Not the first, the fourth. And he's like, well, because I figure at this point, I at least know what not to do.

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I actually have a lot more information than I had previously. I'm back at zero, but I'm not at zero in terms of knowledge. So now I'm like, okay, I know how to build because I've done that before. And I know the pitfalls because I've fallen into them. He really sees that experience as this beautiful level up instead of as if he's done something wrong.

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So just study other people and listen to other people's stories because you're going to hear that this is part of the journey. Failure is part of the path to success, period. And every time you reach a new level, you fail at new levels. Every single time you get to a new level, you're going to encounter ways that you're going to mess up or lose money or lose time or hire the wrong person.

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It's just what happens. But if you can learn from that and keep going, keep pushing forward, you are so much further along than 90% of people who encounter a hardship and give up.

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Well, I would say if you don't have anything that requires you to be up early, then you should go with whatever your natural rhythms are. So if I didn't have four kids, I'm not sure what my normal rhythm would be, but I have to make sure everybody gets up and gets out the door to school.

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Yeah, I went to a year of college. And I'm going to use air quotes because it was an acting conservatory. So it wasn't even like legit college. How do you think about college now? You have kids. Do you encourage them to go to college? I encourage my kids to go to college. My oldest is 18, so he is about to choose.

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By the end of this week, he will know all the places he got into and where he's going to decide to go. Thank you. And I encourage them to go for two reasons. One, because I think college gives you four more years before you have to be a responsible adult. And I think we all wish we had that. So I love that they can have this time to experiment and learn who they are with a bit of a safety net.

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The other reason that I encourage them to go to college is because they won't have to pay for it. I work really hard to make a really beautiful life. And that means that my kids won't have to pay for school. But if my kids did have to pay for school, I think I'd have a completely different perspective on it. I know that it is possible to be incredibly successful without going to college.

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If you want to be a doctor, Yeah. If you want to be a lawyer, like there are certain things you need to do to get that accreditation, but lots of other things. I feel like you can be very successful in this life learning as you go through apprenticeships, learning through online. There's so much freaking information that you can get online for free.

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I would never encourage someone to go to college if it was going to put them into debt. That makes no sense to me.

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And then there are other people listening who might have a nine to five job that they have to start a commute for. But if you don't have to, like I have a ton of friends who are entrepreneurs and they might not wake up until 11 a.m., 12 o'clock because they don't have to. And they can stay up all night and really lean into when they feel most creative.

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That's why I was saying having a routine that works for you. Take a bunch of the information and do the research. Find out what works for other people. But at the end of the day, it needs to be applicable to your life or it's not going to get you the results that you want. Now, I will just...

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Well, I looked at moments in my life where I felt like I had had what Oprah calls the aha moment, when I had had a moment of like, oh God, how did I not see that before? So there's one in the book for this talking about being a manager of people and being an entrepreneur. So this one will maybe resonate with the audience. But I had an employee at the time that I was really struggling with.

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

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I was trying to figure out how to be a better manager because I was like, it must be me. If I could better manage this person, then we wouldn't be having these problems. And so I was trying to become a better manager and I was reading a ton of books and I was watching all the YouTube videos I could find. And I happened to find this YouTube video, super old school, from early 2000s.

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And this guy was talking about hiring and firing people. And I think probably my fatal flaw as a manager of people since I first started my business is I don't want anyone to be mad at me. I want to be like a nice person and I give people way too many chances. And then the work really suffers.

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And then the quality of your team's work overall suffers because everyone else on the team is like, well, you let that person get away with coming three hours late. So I was watching this video and he said, would you hire them again today?

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caveat or add a little bit here, for someone who does need to be up early and they really want to have a morning routine, they want to be a morning person, but they don't feel like they are, that's a learned skill. Nobody comes into this world, nobody gives birth to a baby and the doctor looks at the baby and they're like, oh, it's an early riser. That's not a thing.

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He said, if they came in for an interview and you knew everything about them that you've just experienced over the last time, would you hire this person again today? And if the answer is no, you need to fire them immediately. And I was like, whoa. And that became such an...

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Right, it became such an incredible question, like with friendships or with commitments that I had or with relationships with people where I was like, wait a minute, am I in this relationship with my friend from high school? We have totally different lives and I feel like I kind of become the worst version of myself when I'm with them. Would I sign up for again today? No way.

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So why am I still showing up for this relationship? And I'm like, oh, because I'm pot committed. Like, I feel like I've given so much time, I've given so much effort, or I don't want to be the bad guy. And so I stay inside of things I shouldn't be inside of. And I don't know if you've ever heard that quote, it's not the employee you hire that destroys your business. It's the one you won't fire.

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And that as a question for me to keep asking, like, would you sign up for this again? Would you hire them again? Would you go on a second date? And I say this again and again in the book, you don't need to make a decision based on the new information you have. If you're like, yep, I wouldn't hire Robert again today. You don't have to do anything.

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You might not yet have the courage to do what needs to be done, but just knowing that information is empowering. It changes the way you approach the relationship. It changes maybe how you give them direction, maybe a little fire in your belly. You're like, dang, this costs me a lot of money and I'm not leading well. Dave Ramsey says to be unclear is to be unkind.

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I'm not being clear with this employee. Just having the information is empowering. So I looked at times in my life where I'd been given a question that really helped me. And then I tried to share them in the chapters of the book.

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We have to be careful, I think, as entrepreneurs, because entrepreneurs, even if we get stuff done, if we knock it out of the park, we do it. We're also dreamers. In our heart of hearts, we're dreamers and we can envision big things and we can imagine big things and that is so powerful. It's also super dangerous. I say dangerous because we'll meet someone.

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We desperately need to hire a marketing manager and we meet someone and they're a marketing manager and they're like... sort of good and you really need help. And so you're like, you can envision in your head what Becky's going to be. And you make up this whole fantasy about how great Becky's going to be and how it's going to clear a bunch of time in your day.

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And really that had nothing to do with this employee and who they are. You just made it up in your own mind. So continuing to ask yourself again and again, would I sign up? It's also, if someone's listening to this and they're an employee, Let's say you have a side hustle, you're dreaming about starting your own thing.

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If you wouldn't sign up for this job again, if you're like, this job is the worst, I hate this, I don't want to be here. What are you doing? There are a lot of ways to pay your rent. There are a lot of ways to make money. And life is too freaking short to be miserable.

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So if you want anything in life, if you want a habit that you don't currently have, you can teach yourself that habit. So if I were you, and let's say you get up every day at seven and you want to get to a place where you're part of the 5 a.m. club. Set that alarm 15 minutes earlier every single day. Let your body adjust to getting up earlier.

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So if you wouldn't sign up for this job again, again, you don't have to make a change today, but you definitely have some information now that should affect the way you are living your life. Maybe you start to be on the lookout or maybe you need to increase the side hustle so that you can have more income.

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Everything that I do, the podcast or the books or even the website has always been about this idea that we get one shot to do this life. One, you get one time, one journey through this. And I just think we have to do everything in our power to enjoy the experience, to live the best that we can and to stretch into our full potential. And if you are miserable in your day job,

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I don't know how much you're gonna be able to show up for the people in your life that you love. I don't know how much you're gonna enjoy your weekends. I don't know that you're giving the full energy and full capacity to the dream that you're trying to build. Because if all of your vibration is being lowered, going into the nine to five all week long,

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that's going to affect what you're able to do in the off hours. It's going to affect the side hustle.

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So if you could pay your bills in a different way, if you could maybe have a job that doesn't require quite so much, and maybe it's not as exciting, but like we're paying rent and we can like fully put our heart and soul because we have the energy and a higher vibration to put into the dream, I think you'd be shocked at what would happen.

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The clarity and the sense of purpose and the real impact of our work happens when we start to strip things away, not when we add to them. I don't think that with all the responsibilities we have in this life that we can successfully try and build 10 completely different businesses at the same time. You have to pick one thing.

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There's a fantastic book that everybody should read. Honestly, everybody in your audience. It's very small, super easy to get through. It's The Dip by Seth Godin. It's so fantastic. If you find yourself in a season of, do I really want to do this? Should I keep going? Should I stay in this? Should I go?

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He gives this beautiful quote, which I reference in this book, is the opposite of quitting is not to continue to do the same thing. The opposite of quitting is recommitting with passion. So people find themselves and they're like, should I quit or should I keep going?

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But if you decide not to quit, the way that you come back and you add life to that and power to that is you're like, not only am I going to keep doing this thing because I believe in my dream and I believe in my company, I'm going to show up, but you recommit with passion. You're like, I'm all in. You get fired up. You remember your why. You show up for what you're trying to do.

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Because otherwise, you're going to be in the exact same spot questioning the exact same thing again next year.

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Because I think that the world teaches us that the answer to everything we're looking for is to add more things. The world's like, add a new house, get a new car, get a bigger job, make more money. And the older I get, the more I understand that the clarity and the sense of purpose and the real true impact of our work happens when we start to strip things away, not when we add to them.

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Make sure that you have something exciting to wake up for. Like I love coffee. So it's really easy for me to pop out of bed. Or if I have a new book that I'm reading, because I'm super nerdy, but if I have a new book that I'm reading that I feel like I'm learning a ton from, that'll get me out of bed.

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So, you know, if you have people in your community who are working on side hustles and Same with my peeps and whether it's at a book tour or maybe they call in to ask a question on the podcast, I will inevitably have people who are like, I really want to build my own company. I'm like, that's amazing. Tell me about it.

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And they're like, well, so I am a dog groomer, but also I am a wedding photographer. And also I bake cupcakes and also, and I'm like, yeah, no, you got to pick one. You have to pick one thing. I don't think that with all the responsibilities we have in this life that we can successfully try and build 10 completely different businesses at the same time.

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So this idea of what must you let go of, I ask myself at least once a month, and I encourage everybody to do this. to ask in order to be the best version of myself, what do I need to lose? What should not be here?

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Whether that's excuses, whether that's a habit, whether that's something you currently consume, whether that's, you know what, I need to stop trying to do 50 things and just go all in on one. What do you need to let go of is really powerful. It's like, girl, we are not asking you to add one more thing to your life. We're asking you to stop signing up for the class bake sale.

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Stop signing up to throw your cousin's baby shower. Stop saying yes to things you don't really want to do so that you can have as much time as possible to work on yourself or work on your dreams.

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Yeah, there's a fantastic author named Bob Goff. He's really like everyone's favorite grandpa, very, very wise. And he says he quits something every Thursday. He's like, Rach, I quit something every Thursday. Him and his assistant ask each other, what are you quitting today? I'm like, that is a lot of quitting. He's like, I know, but it really works. So they'll come up with these little habits.

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Have something that you're headed right into so that you've got a reason to meet your alarm where it meets you instead of hitting the snooze.

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It's more just like creating the intention of asking what should not be here. Especially if you built a business from the ground up It's amazing because it means you know how to do every part of your business. It's also so dangerous because you know how to do every part of your business. So it's so easy to be like, I can do that. I can figure that out. I'll write that. I'll post that.

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I'll do the thing. And it's not the best use of your time. What are the things that only you can do and only you should be doing? And if you teach yourself to ask what shouldn't be here, like if you brain dump, you take all the stuff that's in your head right now, write it down in a journal. You're like, I got to do all this stuff.

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The first thing to do is look at the brain dump and ask, what is not mine? What can I just absolutely delete? What can I delegate? And then once you've cleared that out of the way, you're like, okay, done. These six things, that's what I actually need to do. And I need to be better about pushing off the other stuff that should not be on my agenda.

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I'm sure you've read it, but Traction and Rocket Fuel are both such incredible books every entrepreneur needs to read.

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But the idea of having someone who can integrate your vision for you instead of you doing every single thing in the business to have someone who comes in operationally so that you can be the visionary and be the person who's imagining like where you're going to go and what you're going to do. It's really hard to teach ourselves because we're like, it's just faster if I do it.

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But what we accidentally do is also then teach our teams to function that way. So then you have someone who's your marketing head who's posting on social because they're like, well, I can just do it. But then they're not able to function at their highest level and give you the results that you're paying them for.

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So it's not just important that we lead ourselves, but it's also the reminder that how you function in your role, your team is watching you to understand how they're supposed to function in their role.

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So the big thing that is actually little is just asking yourself, are you giving way too much power and way too much energy to something that's really, truly not that big a deal? For instance, if we're speaking in terms of entrepreneurship, are you currently doing something and putting so much emphasis and so much time around this piece and

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And it actually isn't giving you the results that you think it is, or it's actually not that huge of a deal, but you're just so in the cycle, you can't step out of it. Or the example I use in the book is so silly, but going to concerts or vacations or traveling by myself is so normal that

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But I know a lot of women that that would be their worst nightmare to go to a concert alone or go on a vacation alone. They're like, I'd love to travel, but I don't have anyone to go with. And I'm like, well, if you can afford it, then go on the trip. Like, oh my God, I could never. And I'm like, okay, well, you're making a mountain out of a molehill. This is actually not that big a deal.

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

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I was on a podcast tour a couple of years ago and I would ask the audience, what's a crazy thing you've always wanted to do, but you tell yourself that's for other people. I'm not that kind of a girl. That's for other people. And the overwhelming response was get a tattoo. And I was like, girl, literally you could leave here tonight and go to a tattoo parlor and get like a dot.

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It doesn't have to be a big deal. And then all of a sudden, between one breath and the next, you are a person who has tattoos. You've done it. You've actually changed the way that you see yourself.

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

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So you have to be really careful in life that these things that have become really big tent poles or really big belief systems, every once in a while you need to like shake things up and ask, why do I believe that? Why am I so scared of this? Why do I keep doing the same thing? So what big thing is actually little?

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And then what little thing is actually big is really a call to understand how powerful we are as individual people. I don't care who you are listening to this, where this finds you today. I don't care how lost you feel or stuck you feel. You are powerful beyond measure. You have so much capability. You have so much potential. There's that great quote, which I'm going to mess up.

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If you truly understood how powerful you were, you would be shocked. So it's just a call to remember what is it that you are capable of? Are you truly living into your potential? If you get really honest with yourself, what percentage are you at right now?

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Yeah, I don't know if this is every entrepreneur. I sort of think it is. A lot of my friends who are in the space or who are entrepreneurs, I feel like every five to seven years, there starts to be a shift. Or if there's not, I think the work begins to feel a bit stale. Especially if you're an entrepreneur, you're a risk taker, you're ambitious, you're competitive.

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If 100% is you showing up as the best version of you every day, if you were being really honest with yourself, what's your percentage rating today? And again, that's not to make you feel shame. It's more just give yourself the knowledge. You don't have to change anything today. But if you have the information, if you're like, you know what, if I'm being totally honest, I'm giving 70%.

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I have more to give. I think I'm going to get the percentage wrong. But David Goggins, this really famous ultra runner says, when you feel tired for the first time on a run, you're really only at like 40%. Which is so crazy, but I'm a long distance runner. I cannot tell you how often I've been on a run and I'm like, I'm tired. And then I hear David Goggins say like, you're only at 40%.

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I'm like, okay, let's go.

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

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Yeah, exactly. So just asking yourself these questions gives you some more information for where could you put a little bit more effort in? Where do you need to challenge your limiting beliefs so that you can move further along this year?

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When I was younger, I used to think that everything, like all of our success was wrapped in our imagination. Like how big could we dream and what was possible and how hard were we willing to work? And I have learned over time that it really isn't about your dreams. It's about your standards. It is what is the minimum standard for your life that allows you to grow.

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So it's not in the book I say, it's not about expanding your ceiling. It's about raising your floor. Because if you elevate, if you draw a line in the sand and you say, I will never go backwards. I will never be that person again. I will never smoke another cigarette or drink too much tequila.

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

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I'm trying to think of leverage points in my life where I like, you know, I got sick because I had too much Jose Cuervo. And then the next day I was like, I can never have tequila again. It was like a very definitive line in the sand.

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

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But if you could approach habits that way, if you could approach conversations with yourself that way, if you could be that hardcore about, you know what, I am never going to commit to this kind of thing again, or I'm never going to allow myself to be spoken to this way again. If you can raise your floor and

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If you can raise your standards, then you actually get closer to the ceiling without the ceiling needing to break. So now we're actually achieving more and we're setting a new level for ourselves because we're not backtracking. I think most of us can get really excited because it's the new year. They're really excited because we've just celebrated a big birthday.

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We can get pumped up and motivate ourselves to go do something big that pushes us closer to our goals and dreams because of what's going on in our life. That's easy. The question is, can you do it next Tuesday? Can you do it when life gets hard? Can you do it when you get punched in the stomach? Can you do it when your girlfriend breaks up with you?

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Can you keep doing the thing even when you don't want to? That's a standard. Years ago, one of the women in my community was going through something really hard. I ran into her at like an airport or something. And she said, I do all the things you say because I'm big on morning routine and the habits that you have in your day.

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And so I think you're always looking around for what's happening in the market and how you might move with what's going on. So I actually started, my very first business was as an event planner. In Los Angeles, I started planning weddings and bought mitzvahs.

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So she's like, you know, I drink the water and I get up early and I'm doing gratitude and whatever. But my mom... has cancer. I don't know how I'm supposed to keep trying to like add to my life and do all these things that I used to be excited about when I'm going through something hard.

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And I was like, oh no, I don't think that we build habits so that we can keep expanding when life is hard because life will absolutely be hard. I think we build great habits so that when life kicks the crap out of us, we don't lose all of the traction we've gained. So we're like, okay, I'm not expansive right now, but by God, I'm also not backtracking. I'm going to just minimum effective dose.

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I'm going to keep showing up in the same ways you build those great habits when you can so that they're there when you need them. It's not about doing more. It's about raising your floor.

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This is for anybody, because this used to be me, where you've started and stopped a lot of dreams. You've started and stopped a lot of health plans, exercise regimens. You've tried to quit smoking a million times. For anybody who's started and stopped and it hasn't stuck, you've actually created a pattern in your psychology that says that you're a quitter.

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You're like, well, you know, I try and then I quit. And every time you quit, it reinforces the belief that you have that you are a quitter. It's why the line in the sand is so freaking powerful because you're like, but I stuck with something. I didn't quit on this one thing.

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So one of my favorite things to encourage people to do is to give up one thing that you currently consume, alcohol, cigarettes, binge watching TV until 2 a.m. and messing up your sleep schedule. Anything that you currently consume that you know is not good for you. Doesn't matter what it is. Everyone will have something that pops into their head.

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If I just stopped doing this thing, I would feel better. I don't even care if you replace the thing with a different thing. It's just for 30 days, can you commit to not consuming that one habit? And if you do, at the end of those 30 days, you're like, oh, dude, I can keep a promise to myself. I can keep my word.

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And then I slowly moved into getting to do corporate events, getting to work on movie premieres and press junkets and working in the entertainment industry. And then in 2007, 2008, I kept hearing about this thing called a blog. Everyone was blogging. I didn't really know what that meant. So I just started to blog.

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We will keep our words and our commitment to every single person in our life and break the promise we made to ourself. So just for 30 days, if you can do something, you will shift the way that you see yourself. It literally doesn't matter what it is. It just matters that you keep your honor in this pact you've made with yourself.

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Oh my gosh. I used to beat myself up like I think a lot of people for not being where I wanted to be, for not winning every single time, for not knocking it out of the park. And honestly...

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I think most of us have experience with this, that you're like, I can either look at these losses as an example of why I shouldn't keep going and why I'm not who I thought I was, or I can gain as much information as possible out of this lived experience, and I can use it to help myself move to the next level. So it's not a question of did you win or you lose?

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It's a question of did you win or you learn? Because... As we're going through this, you are going to fail. I cannot stress this to you enough. You're going to lose money. You're going to lose time. You're going to piss people off. You're going to make mistakes. You're going to hire the wrong person probably over and over and over because just every entrepreneur I know has that story.

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It's part of the process. But if you can ask yourself, if you have the courage to look at what has happened and ask yourself, okay, what went wrong? How could we do that better next time? How was I responsible for this? How were they responsible for this? Okay, we're moving forward with this information. Then suddenly you're empowered. You're not like the loser who keeps messing up.

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You're like, oh, I keep trying stuff. And in trying stuff, I'm going to make mistakes and I'm going to learn as I go. I heard once that when you can remember something that used to make you emotional and it doesn't make you emotional anymore, it's now wisdom.

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So when you can look at, you know, I'm sure, Holly, you have an experience in your business where you're like, oh, I can't believe I did that. The minute that you can get to a place where you can look at that with acceptance, you're like, yeah, I did the best I could. I didn't know better. Now I do. But it doesn't make you upset anymore. That is like chef's kiss. That is the goal.

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And as we grow in our entrepreneurial careers, the faster we can get to that, like the quicker we can get to the postmortem, like looking at what happened and not being emotional about it. Oh my gosh. It is the biggest unlock because now you can move faster than the competition because you're not obsessing over the things you did wrong. You're like, yes. And where are we going from here?

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I would literally write about what I ate for dinner last night and I just kept putting it out. And I had an intern one day that said, you know, blog's actually supposed to be about something, right? And I was like, oh, thank you. So I started to blog about events and how you could host events in your home and set a beautiful table.

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This one I actually heard very early in my entrepreneurial career. I used to go to any conference I could go to, and I really hope your listeners try this as much as you can. Go listen to other successful entrepreneurs talk about their life.

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Now you've got so much access with podcasts and YouTube, but being in person and listening to someone share their story, even if they're not in your industry, is just, oh, it's so helpful. So I got to hear Mariam Nafisi, who founded Minted. This was eons ago, very early in their career. And Minted started as a website for artists to show their paintings off or something.

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It was not at all what it is today. And she said this line I never forgot, which was follow the signs of life. So she's like, we launched this company. We were so excited and it just did not work. And she had gotten like investment money and everyone was freaking out and it was .com era. So everything should work, but this website was not working.

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And just month after month after month, it was failing. And she was like, okay, is any part of this site working? And I'm gonna botch this story, but it's some version of this. She's like, is any part of this website working? They look in the backend and they see that there's this one thing, an artist was putting their art on stationery and they were like selling the stationery.

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No one was buying the paintings, but this one artist or this handful of artists, the stationery was selling. It was the only part of the business that was working, but we saw that and we were like, okay, Could we take artists' work and put it on more stationary? Might that be a thing? And of course, then that was the foundation of Minted and it's very successful and all these years later, so big.

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But it happened because they were looking at what was working And trying to figure out how to expand on that. So in the business, it doesn't matter what industry you're in. It's so easy to get bogged down in like, this is the way we've always done things. Or assuming that you know how the audience is finding you or assuming that you know the data.

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You have to actually know what's working unemotionally. You know, if you're looking in the back and you're like, wow, this is crazy. So many people are listening to this kind of podcast episode or so many people are buying only this product. So pay attention to what's working in your business. Pay attention to what's working in your life.

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And slowly but surely, I kept figuring that out and figuring it out. And then one day a brand reached out and said, posts. And I will never forget, it was Eggland's Best Eggs. And they offered me $250. And I was like, I am rich. And this is a business. And I realized that there was, I mean, now it's so common, but back then we didn't really know what we were doing.

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When you're going through your day, which parts of your day feel really good? Are there friends or relationships in your life that... really pump you up? Are there friends or relationships that really drain you? Okay, some part of that equation is not working. So how do we put more energy and our own life into the parts that work?

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If you, as entrepreneurs have not studied Pareto principle or the 80-20 principle, it's such a game changer in understanding the idea that a small amount of your effort actually equates to a very big return. The problem is we're doing 100 things, and we don't know which of the 100 are giving us the results.

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When you can start to identify which things are actually working, you can pour more gasoline on that, and then you start to get these exponential results without exponential effort.

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Yeah. Yeah.

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know where the highest revenue comes from. So I know we're at the end, but let me give you this like bit of wisdom because it was huge for me. So I told you all that I started as a wedding planner back in the day. And I used to advertise on a website called The Knot, which was like, probably still is the place to get clients if you're a wedding planner.

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And it costs a lot of money to do that advertising. And I would, at the end of the year, you know, oh, I made this money and I go on with my life. And I went to one of these business conferences and I heard someone talk about margin, which truly I did not know about what margin was.

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And so I went home that day and I made a list of all the clients that I had and how much money I had made and the margin on each of them. And then I put where I got that business from. And when I looked at that list, I was shocked to discover that all of my highest revenue, like the best margin, best budget clients came from one person. They did not come from the website.

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They did not come from advertising. They came from a photographer. this high-end photographer who only had high-end clients. So when she referred them to me, I knew that they were people who had a budget to afford me and they ended up just being a better clientele overall.

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So the next year I stopped spending money on the website and just absolutely kissed up to this one photographer and bought her gifts, took her to lunch, spa days. And I did the same for some other vendors and I saw my business explode and my revenue explode. So the best piece of advice I could give you about profit is know where the best clients are actually coming from. So good.

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I think it really has to be about checking in with yourself about what success looks like this year or this quarter, because it really does change as we get older. And it really does change as you have more responsibility, whether that's employees or family who is counting on you. And you have to keep checking in with what matters, right?

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And it's so, so easy to get caught in the race of trying to one-up people or compete on social media or how many followers do you have? And at the end of the day, we can achieve success in the eyes of the world and live a life that's completely bankrupt and absent of joy. And I really want to find a balance. When I was younger, I was a workaholic. My early entrepreneurial career was just nonstop.

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there comes a point where a toll will be paid. And usually, especially for women, but this happens with men too, the toll is paid in our health. We start to experience health problems. We start to get anxiety. We start to get just all kinds of things go wrong because we are so good at forcing ourselves to keep up with the hustle. We don't take time to decompress. We don't take time for self-care.

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We're stressed to the max. And so that is gonna cost something. So as I've gotten older, I've learned, yeah, I want to be very successful. I want to make a lot of money. I got four kids. I want to live a beautiful life. But simultaneously, it can't come at the cost of my health or my peace. I have to balance both areas.

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So we just started to build a company around having a website that brands wanted to be a part of. And if we could just create content that was really, really good, that maybe people would pay to get in front of our audience. So I did that for a while, built that up to a place I was really proud of it.

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If you like a podcast, I also have a podcast. I tend to talk more about holistic success. So that's the Rachel Hollis podcast and you can grab my books anywhere books are sold and I'm on social media.

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You're so welcome. Thank you for having me.

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And then because I was writing every day for the blog, started to dream about writing my own book. I've always been a book nerd. I've wanted to be an author since I was a little girl. And so I was like, okay, I'm just going to try this. And I published my first book in 2014. And, you know, like five people cared.

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I wasn't an overnight success by any stretch of the imagination, but I just kept writing. I'd come out with a book every year. And on my sixth book, which was in 2018, I wrote a book called Girl, Wash Your Face, which unbeknownst to me or anybody else in the entire world became this runaway success. And it really launched my career in personal development.

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Stop saying yes to things you don't really want to do so that you can have as much time as possible to work on yourself or work on your dreams. It really isn't about your dreams, it's about your standards. If you can raise your floor, if you can raise your standards, then you actually get closer to the ceiling without the ceiling needing to break.

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I never, I cannot even believe that this is my career, to be honest with you, Hala. But yeah, I just tend to, I think, move at the risk of being a hippie, like move with flow and move with where I feel like I'm being guided. And then I test stuff. If it's just easy to move into it, I expand with what's going on. So my career has had a lot of different...

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versions of itself, but the entrepreneurial spirit is at the core of everything. So it's one thing to be interested in a certain kind of content, but to figure out how to monetize that in a big way is the key. And I think as long as I have done it, I've kept the same customer base. So the woman who was reading my blog in 2008 is the same woman who reads my books and listens to my podcast today.

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There is no such thing as an overnight success. I cannot tell you how many journalists, when I came out with Girl, Stop Apologizing, which followed Girl, Wash Your Face, were like, oh my gosh, are you so excited to have your second book out? And I was like, this is my seventh. So part of what I think happened there is something that happens a lot with athletes at the highest level.

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I am obsessed with athletes. I'm not obsessed with sports. I don't really know a lot about sports, but I'm so curious about the athletes, the Olympians. How do they make themselves do the same thing over and over at the highest level and get the best results again and again? Because essentially as an entrepreneur, that's what we're asking of ourselves. So I'm obsessed with this question.

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And one of the themes that I've seen over and over is that athletes at the high levels fall in love with the grind. They're in love with the process. They're in love with how do I make this better by the tiniest millisecond? So for me, I really think a big part of this success was I wasn't trying to be successful. I just really liked writing books. I liked writing and I was trying to get better.

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And that was my only goal was I thought, well, if you read my first book and you read my third book, As a reader, would you think I had improved as a writer? That's all I was trying to do. And Girl, Wash Your Face was honestly, I think, a fluke in a lot of ways. I actually think my ability to write fiction is why I have success in the personal development space.

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because my audience are not people who self-identify as personal development nerds. It's not like Tony Robbins' entire audience goes over to me. I was speaking to women who maybe had never considered personal development before. They might not even have ever gone to therapy. They really had not considered these things at all.

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So I think my ability to storytell and explain how I went through it and how it was helpful, that really was a massive unlock that wasn't in the space. Because I didn't really know how to be a personal development writer, I think that I brought something to it that maybe didn't exist before. But gosh, I cannot stress that enough to any of your listeners.

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It really is an overnight success after working at it for a decade. It's like what we do in the dark that gets celebrated in the light. Nobody's going to cheer for you. Nobody's going to be there like rooting you on, especially at the hardest moments.

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the process enough to keep going because you know, you don't know when, but you know at some point you're going to get the results that you're striving for.

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That's great.

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Yeah. And I think going back to that idea of the audience, if you figured out your customer base, if you figured out your audience, and even as you were changing the format of your show, you were learning how to do a show. You were learning how to be better. You were learning how to tell jokes or do an interview. So nothing is wasted. Nothing is lost.

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It's so easy to look at social media and see everybody else crossing the finish line and feel like you are not far enough along in your race. But like it's all stacking on top of each other to lead you where you're supposed to go. So just stick with it.

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Yeah. So we didn't have that word influencer. It's so common now, but you didn't call it that. I knew a lot of women like me who had websites where they created content. You were a mommy blogger. I remember that term. Yeah, like we just... created this content based on whatever we were interested in. Like Joy Cho with Oh Joy did something very different than I did on my site.

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And it changed based on whatever your interests were. But then brands wanted our audience. And you have to remember, social media did not exist back then like it does today. We had Facebook, but even then we didn't really know what we were doing with Facebook. So many of these brands wanted access to people who were devout followers.

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I mean, they would check in every day to see what you wrote about. They'd share it with their friends. And so- we didn't know what to charge. We didn't know what that was worth. And I think probably we all charged way too little for the amount of access we were giving away or what they were able to get out of it. But we really were, it felt like the Wild West of doing branded content for people.

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But it was fun and we were figuring it out. And if I could go back in time, I'm sure I would approach it so differently. But I'm sure there are versions of this today of being in an industry that's either coming up for the first time or maybe shifting so quickly that you feel like you're building the airplane while you're flying it through the air.

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There's a certain kind of magic and energy that happens inside of that. And it definitely was that for us. But yeah, we just kept like, okay, let's try this thing. And now let's do this. And even building a team inside of a business that didn't exist before, like you couldn't call someone or look online and go, well, how do you build a lifestyle website? How do you hire editors?

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How do you hire a photographer? We were making it up as we went along for sure.

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Yeah, for sure. Again, these things are common now. Back then it wasn't a thing, but I had just run the LA Marathon and to celebrate, I went with my then husband to Mexico. We were on a beach in Mexico and I was wearing a bathing suit that I thought was really cute. And I had a following on Facebook, but maybe 10,000 people. It wasn't huge at all.

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And I was like, oh, they'll like this bathing suit because the bathing suit was monogrammed. And I was like, oh, I'm going to show them. And it was a bikini. And I asked my husband at the time, I was like, oh, can you take a picture of me in this bikini? And he took a few pictures. And then I went to the pool and I was looking through the photos.

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And in all the photos, you could see my stretch marks pretty predominantly. And I was like, oh, I don't know. Maybe I'm not going to post this. And I was like, oh, who cares? Everyone who follows me is a mom like me. They probably have stretch marks too. They're still going to love this bathing suit. I'm just going to write about how I didn't want to post it because of these stretch marks.

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And I will never forget this, that I posted it. I was on crappy Wi-Fi. So I went, I did like a refresh to make sure that it had posted. And when I refreshed it, it had a hundred likes. Now that doesn't seem like a big deal, but I am telling you, I'd never gotten more than eight likes on something in my entire life. And I was like, holy crap, a hundred likes, this is nuts.

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And then I like refreshed it again and it had like a thousand likes. And I was like, what is going on? And over the course of that day, I just remember sitting by a pool, refreshing and just watching it go and get bigger and bigger. And I probably had 10,000 followers on Facebook. And by the end of the day, I had like a hundred thousand.

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I'll tell you what too, Hala, if you're going to have something go viral, That's not the thing you want to go viral. It's not yourself in a bikini, like not feeling like the best version of you. But that taught me so much because of the response from women to that post. I was like, oh, women really want to talk about things that are real.

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Because this was the era of the Pinterest birthday party and everything had to be perfect and our kids needed to look amazing. And I was like, oh, women really want to talk about real things. So that honestly, I think, planted the seed of what Girl, Wash Your Face would become, which was, can we have a real conversation about what this really feels like? Yes, sometimes it's beautiful.

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And yes, sometimes it's not. And our lives are all of it. So can we hold space for all of that?

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Yeah, I just, I got so much attention for that post. I didn't really know what to do with it, to be honest with you. But it was, in retrospect, just a really great jumping off point of what my career and my writing style would become.

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Yeah. I feel like a grandma when I'm saying this to you, but when all of these new websites came around, so let's say Pinterest is a great example. We learned very quickly as content creators that there was an aesthetic that would get you more noticed, that people really, they wanted the blowout. They wanted full hair and makeup.

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The audience wanted perfect, perfect, perfect, because they never really had a website to see that before. And now you could look up anything on Pinterest and find the most aesthetically pleasing version of that. And we all started to chase that visual ideal, not just in the work we created, but in our lives.

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So I think it was just right for this opportunity for some women to kind of raise their hand and go like, yeah, but that's not always what it looks like. Some days I feel like I look that pretty, but other days that's just not reality. And so if we can show up as our real selves, how would that be?

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I think there's such a better balance of it today because you have creators who are creating on both sides of that spectrum. You have stunningly beautiful doing makeup tutorials. And then you have people who are like, oh, I... I haven't taken a shower in four days and I'm struggling with mental health and this is where I am. And it allows people to see themselves.

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I went from being on top of the world and having this massively successful company to slowly having to lay people off. And by mid 2021, this business I had spent so many years building up to came crashing down.

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Oh my gosh, this is like asking what is my favorite child. I think honestly the biggest shift that happened for me about 15 years ago was understanding what a morning routine was and the value of creating one around not just what I wanted to achieve, but the season of life that I am in. I think there's so much content out there telling you how to build a morning routine.

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I had the opportunity to meet an author I really loved and admired in Jen Hatmaker. And she was so many of us, like, oh, we all just like were obsessed with her. And I got to meet her and I was fangirling so hard. And she asked me a question that truly changed the course of my life. She was like, oh, what's the next book you're writing? And I was like, oh, oh my gosh.

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Okay, well, because I was writing fiction and I was telling her all about this fiction that I was writing. And she said, no, God, no, not that. What's the story of your heart? What's the thing you would say to women if you could say anything? And I truly did not know that I had an answer to that question. I just started word vomiting all over her.

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I was like, oh, I just, I wish that women knew how powerful they were. And I wish they knew they could stand up and go again. And I wish they knew they could take ownership of their life. And it's like, girl, like, please get it together. Stop crying, girl. And so I just kept saying like, girl, and she was like, oh, right, girl, wash your face. Yeah. And I was like, oh my, that, that.

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And I left that conversation with her that we were on a trip together. I left that conversation and wrote the first chapter of what would become Girl, Wash Your Face in the aftermath of our chat. And so the idea that someone could ask you a question that completely shifts the way you see yourself or your work, oh my gosh, it's so incredibly powerful.

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Honestly, it feels like a really beautiful bookend to Girl, Wash Your Face, to be honest. When you have the kind of success that I had with that book, everyone wants you to just keep writing that book. They're like, do it again, do it again, do it again. And I've just gotten to the place in my life and my career where I don't want to tell anybody else how to live.

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When I wrote Girl, Wash Your Face, I was like, I have all of your answers. I know exactly what you should do. And the older I get, the more I understand that everyone's on their own journey. And without context into someone else's lived experience, you can't really offer great advice.

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But I have had those moments and I have had those prompts and those questions where someone gave me a bit of wisdom that utterly changed the way I saw myself. So I thought, well, could I share some of the framework that I've used to figure out my own path and my own answers?

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So instead of a book of my answers, it's a book of my questions so that you can form your own answers to wherever you are or whatever's going on for you.

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And it's really easy to start to gather information and not really take that on board in what will work for you. So if you are a new parent with a new baby at home, your life and your ability to wake up in the morning is going to look very different than if you are a freelancer in your 20s.

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I think this audience will really identify with the fact that at the beginning of 2020, I had a staff of 60 people. I had a massive business that was based on live events. I threw conferences for women to work on personal development and we were crushing it. We're absolutely crushing it. And when into 2020... So freaking pumped, so excited.

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We did an event in January of 2020 in Florida that was like 6,000 people for three days. We were like, here we go, let's do it. March, very first week of March, 2020, we did an event in Toronto. It was our first international conference, absolutely crushed it.

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And I remember at that conference, we started to hear about this thing that was happening in China and people were getting sick and we were like, wow, this is wild. By the time I got back to Austin, which is where I lived at the time, the world was shutting down. And like most people, we were like, okay, I guess we'll work from home for a couple weeks and then we'll be back.

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And obviously that's not what happened, but probably one of the worst businesses you could be in in 2020 was live events. So I went from being on top of the world and having this massively successful company to slowly having to lay people off. And by mid-2021, just everything had shut down. I just had taken my staff back to, I think, four or five people.

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And the podcast really became the core of my business. But this business I had spent so many years building up to came crashing down. And I know your audience is going to get this too. So much of that business was me. That's how I saw myself. It was my identity. I had a massive ego death, like so many things happened.

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But that, so the business collapsing, I went through a really bad divorce in 2020. And just, it felt kind of like one thing had stacked on top of another. And in 2020, 20, oh gosh, it's all running together in my mind. Within the last couple of years, my ex-husband, my children's father passed away unexpectedly.

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And that was sort of just getting your head back above water and then life kicks the crap out of you again. And I know I'm not the only one who has that story either. I know that so many people have their version of getting sick or losing someone they love or getting fired or trying to figure it out. And I think it affects us all in different ways. But for me...

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So for me, really understanding the importance of that time, like I have four kids, so waking up before my kids wake up, I know it sounds so simple, but if you start your day on offense versus on defense, it makes all the difference. So waking up before anyone else in the house, having my coffee, I sit in the same spot every single day. I read nonfiction. I do a gratitude practice.

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there's just so much psychologically tied up in all of it. And there are times where I've felt like, why am I working so hard? Why am I trying to build this? Why am I trying to do this thing if it can like go away that fast? And then other times where I'm like, oh, we've worked too hard to like give up now. So it's sort of vastly between both of those things. But

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I really wanted to write about that lived experience because that's my trauma. But I guarantee people listening to this have way worse stories that they could tell and way harder things that they've lived through. There's some solace in understanding you're not the only one who maybe had to fight hard to get themselves going today. But by God, we're here.

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And we're doing it and we're showing up as the very best that we can with what we've got. And hopefully it gets a little bit easier as we go along. We start to get some momentum and then we can do some really great work.

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be going through a rough patch in their entrepreneurship? That is such a good question. And I love that you're wise enough to ask that, Hala. If you're listening to this and you're like, I am crushing it. I can do no wrong. Because there was a time where I was like, we're just doing all the things. This is working.

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One thing, and you kind of mentioned this already, is anybody who has a business that is audience-based and you access that audience through someone else's business, you need to be really careful. So I told you guys that, you know, I had the website and we built Facebook pages. which sounds so antiquated now, but that was the means to access an audience back in the day.

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And Russell, you mentioned Russell Brunson, he has his own version of this story of you build up this massive audience and then one day the company you access them through changes And now you don't have access anymore. So I remember with Facebook, we killed ourselves building up an audience and getting people to join that page.

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And then one day you posted something and it literally would say underneath your posts, 3% of your followers saw this post. If you'd like to access more of your followers, boost your post. Paying for Facebook ads is so normal now, but there was a time where you did not have to pay to access the audience. The same thing happens when an algorithm changes. The same thing happens as podcasters.

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You know this. iOS did an update a year and a half ago that completely changed. Yes, it completely changed the way that our audience can access our content. And it really makes you aware of how vulnerable you are if you access your fan base or your audience through someone else's business. So yes, I've had an email since I had a blog.

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So 300,000 people, 60% open rate because I have sent her an email every Sunday for 15 years. And I very rarely use that audience I don't monetize it. I don't sell access to them. I just utilize it so that if I'm launching something like a new book, I know that I can speak directly to my fan base without having to pay an advertising fee. So be aware of how you access everybody.

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That's super important. Be aware that I'm going to sound so ridiculous right now, but just real talk. The bigger that you get... everyone's like, this is amazing, this is amazing, this is amazing. And like one day people are like, I don't like this anymore. Especially if you are a woman. Straight up real talk. You hit a point, everyone's rooting for you and they're so proud of what you're doing.

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I do those things that are really paramount to what I am trying to accomplish in my life right now. But that's not something I understood I needed a long time ago. So I know that's kind of like a bigger scope, but building that morning routine around your life and your goals is the key.

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And all of a sudden it's like, wait a minute, something's wrong here. So I wish that I had understood everything that you have to tread lightly. I think you have to be a little bit paranoid when you hit higher levels of success because I tend to be such a Pollyanna and I'm just like, everyone's amazing, everyone's kind, the world is beautiful. And it is, and also it's not.

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So that's where diversifying how you get your revenue is really important. Like you said, if one stream goes away, you know you've got another. But yeah, I just wish I had been a little bit more like a mobster or something. Just like a little bit more like, who's going to get me? Yeah, like I know that that sounds so dramatic, but honestly...

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I think that as women in business, particularly for building a company, particularly as you grow bigger and bigger, I honestly probably would have talked about my success less.

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I thought if I share what we're doing, if I share how many people are employed at this company and they have 401ks and health insurance, and like if I share what we're doing, that will inspire other women to build businesses as well. But the more that I talked about success, the more it seemed to upset people.

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And I wish I had been a bit more protective of what we were doing and the kind of numbers that we do. And now I don't talk about any of that at all. I used to think, Hala, I was like, why doesn't Oprah? Why doesn't Sarah Blakely? Why doesn't Reese Witherspoon? These women are billionaires with a B. Why aren't they talking about their entrepreneurial success? And now I'm like,

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Because the world doesn't like it when women succeed at that level. And if you want to keep succeeding at a certain level, I think that the way that it is acceptable is to be demure and not admit your success. And maybe that's very pessimistic, but that's what I would say to you.

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Seriously. It's so innocent when we do it. It really is so innocent. You're like, holy crap, this team has worked our butts off. We got to tell people we're doing this stuff. But it puts a target on your back. It really does. And I think... I hate that it's the case because I don't think it's the same for men who are entrepreneurs and who are building like people are inspired by that.

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But it's also like this is the game as it exists today. I hope it's not the same when my daughter gets older, but this is the game. And so if you want to play the game and you want to succeed at the highest levels, you have to understand what's going to allow you to keep doing that.

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And I know that there are people who get really frustrated by that because you're like, no, you should break the glass ceiling and speak out against this. And it's like, yes, but also there's a point at which that trying to do that starts to go in opposition of what you're trying to achieve as an entrepreneur. Just hold space for that as you're building this massive thing.

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Right, right. Yeah. We do it too because women are so often underestimated in business. So we want to say, oh, but wait, I've built an eight-figure company. I have 60 employees. Like I've done these because you want to like legitimize yourself. But then simultaneously, I think people just the framework is they tend to hear that as bragging and you're not trying to brag.

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You're more just trying to share your story. But yeah, I just think. Oh, I feel like such a like cheesy, but like be careful, be thoughtful.

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Gosh, first of all, you're not alone. That's so many people. But I think that if you're feeling like that right now, you really need to study more successful entrepreneurs. Because if you study more successful entrepreneurs, you're going to find failures at the greatest, most massive levels. I promise you failures that are way bigger than what you've just gone through.

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And the people whose names we know, it's because they stood up and went again. I sat down with Alex Hormozy a month or two ago, and he was talking about how many times he's failed. And if you follow his journey at all, you hear all these stories. It's like four times he's had these massive failures where he's been not just failed, but someone else has taken all of his money kind of thing. Yeah.

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Where it would be so easy to get so bitter about that and to be like, see, like people are bad. The world's out to get me. I'll never succeed. And I asked him, I'm like, how on earth do you stand back up and go again when this happens for the fourth time? Not the first, the fourth. And he's like, well, because I figure at this point, I at least know what not to do.

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I actually have a lot more information than I had previously. I'm back at zero, but I'm not at zero in terms of knowledge. So now I'm like, okay, I know how to build because I've done that before. And I know the pitfalls because I've fallen into them. He really sees that experience as this beautiful level up instead of as if he's done something wrong.

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So just study other people and listen to other people's stories because you're going to hear that this is part of the journey. Failure is part of the path to success, period. And every time you reach a new level, you fail at new levels. Every single time you get to a new level, you're going to encounter ways that you're going to mess up or lose money or lose time or hire the wrong person.

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It's just what happens. But if you can learn from that and keep going, keep pushing forward, you are so much further along than 90% of people who encounter a hardship and give up.

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Well, I would say if you don't have anything that requires you to be up early, then you should go with whatever your natural rhythms are. So if I didn't have four kids, I'm not sure what my normal rhythm would be, but I have to make sure everybody gets up and gets out the door to school.

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Yeah, I went to a year of college. And I'm going to use air quotes because it was an acting conservatory. So it wasn't even like legit college. How do you think about college now? You have kids. Do you encourage them to go to college? I encourage my kids to go to college. My oldest is 18, so he is about to choose.

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By the end of this week, he will know all the places he got into and where he's going to decide to go. Thank you. And I encourage them to go for two reasons. One, because I think college gives you four more years before you have to be a responsible adult. And I think we all wish we had that. So I love that they can have this time to experiment and learn who they are with a bit of a safety net.

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The other reason that I encourage them to go to college is because they won't have to pay for it. I work really hard to make a really beautiful life. And that means that my kids won't have to pay for school. But if my kids did have to pay for school, I think I'd have a completely different perspective on it. I know that it is possible to be incredibly successful without going to college.

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If you want to be a doctor, Yeah. If you want to be a lawyer, like there are certain things you need to do to get that accreditation, but lots of other things. I feel like you can be very successful in this life learning as you go through apprenticeships, learning through online. There's so much freaking information that you can get online for free.

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I would never encourage someone to go to college if it was going to put them into debt. That makes no sense to me.

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And then there are other people listening who might have a nine to five job that they have to start a commute for. But if you don't have to, like I have a ton of friends who are entrepreneurs and they might not wake up until 11 a.m., 12 o'clock because they don't have to. And they can stay up all night and really lean into when they feel most creative.

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That's why I was saying having a routine that works for you. Take a bunch of the information and do the research. Find out what works for other people. But at the end of the day, it needs to be applicable to your life or it's not going to get you the results that you want. Now, I will just...

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Well, I looked at moments in my life where I felt like I had had what Oprah calls the aha moment, when I had had a moment of like, oh God, how did I not see that before? So there's one in the book for this talking about being a manager of people and being an entrepreneur. So this one will maybe resonate with the audience. But I had an employee at the time that I was really struggling with.

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I was trying to figure out how to be a better manager because I was like, it must be me. If I could better manage this person, then we wouldn't be having these problems. And so I was trying to become a better manager and I was reading a ton of books and I was watching all the YouTube videos I could find. And I happened to find this YouTube video, super old school, from early 2000s.

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And this guy was talking about hiring and firing people. And I think probably my fatal flaw as a manager of people since I first started my business is I don't want anyone to be mad at me. I want to be like a nice person and I give people way too many chances. And then the work really suffers.

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And then the quality of your team's work overall suffers because everyone else on the team is like, well, you let that person get away with coming three hours late. So I was watching this video and he said, would you hire them again today?

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caveat or add a little bit here, for someone who does need to be up early and they really want to have a morning routine, they want to be a morning person, but they don't feel like they are, that's a learned skill. Nobody comes into this world, nobody gives birth to a baby and the doctor looks at the baby and they're like, oh, it's an early riser. That's not a thing.

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He said, if they came in for an interview and you knew everything about them that you've just experienced over the last time, would you hire this person again today? And if the answer is no, you need to fire them immediately. And I was like, whoa. And that became such an...

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Right, it became such an incredible question, like with friendships or with commitments that I had or with relationships with people where I was like, wait a minute, am I in this relationship with my friend from high school? We have totally different lives and I feel like I kind of become the worst version of myself when I'm with them. Would I sign up for again today? No way.

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So why am I still showing up for this relationship? And I'm like, oh, because I'm pot committed. Like, I feel like I've given so much time, I've given so much effort, or I don't want to be the bad guy. And so I stay inside of things I shouldn't be inside of. And I don't know if you've ever heard that quote, it's not the employee you hire that destroys your business. It's the one you won't fire.

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And that as a question for me to keep asking, like, would you sign up for this again? Would you hire them again? Would you go on a second date? And I say this again and again in the book, you don't need to make a decision based on the new information you have. If you're like, yep, I wouldn't hire Robert again today. You don't have to do anything.

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You might not yet have the courage to do what needs to be done, but just knowing that information is empowering. It changes the way you approach the relationship. It changes maybe how you give them direction, maybe a little fire in your belly. You're like, dang, this costs me a lot of money and I'm not leading well. Dave Ramsey says to be unclear is to be unkind.

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I'm not being clear with this employee. Just having the information is empowering. So I looked at times in my life where I'd been given a question that really helped me. And then I tried to share them in the chapters of the book.

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We have to be careful, I think, as entrepreneurs, because entrepreneurs, even if we get stuff done, if we knock it out of the park, we do it. We're also dreamers. In our heart of hearts, we're dreamers and we can envision big things and we can imagine big things and that is so powerful. It's also super dangerous. I say dangerous because we'll meet someone.

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We desperately need to hire a marketing manager and we meet someone and they're a marketing manager and they're like... sort of good and you really need help. And so you're like, you can envision in your head what Becky's going to be. And you make up this whole fantasy about how great Becky's going to be and how it's going to clear a bunch of time in your day.

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And really that had nothing to do with this employee and who they are. You just made it up in your own mind. So continuing to ask yourself again and again, would I sign up? It's also, if someone's listening to this and they're an employee, Let's say you have a side hustle, you're dreaming about starting your own thing.

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If you wouldn't sign up for this job again, if you're like, this job is the worst, I hate this, I don't want to be here. What are you doing? There are a lot of ways to pay your rent. There are a lot of ways to make money. And life is too freaking short to be miserable.

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So if you want anything in life, if you want a habit that you don't currently have, you can teach yourself that habit. So if I were you, and let's say you get up every day at seven and you want to get to a place where you're part of the 5 a.m. club. Set that alarm 15 minutes earlier every single day. Let your body adjust to getting up earlier.

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So if you wouldn't sign up for this job again, again, you don't have to make a change today, but you definitely have some information now that should affect the way you are living your life. Maybe you start to be on the lookout or maybe you need to increase the side hustle so that you can have more income.

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Everything that I do, the podcast or the books or even the website has always been about this idea that we get one shot to do this life. One, you get one time, one journey through this. And I just think we have to do everything in our power to enjoy the experience, to live the best that we can and to stretch into our full potential. And if you are miserable in your day job,

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I don't know how much you're gonna be able to show up for the people in your life that you love. I don't know how much you're gonna enjoy your weekends. I don't know that you're giving the full energy and full capacity to the dream that you're trying to build. Because if all of your vibration is being lowered, going into the nine to five all week long,

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that's going to affect what you're able to do in the off hours. It's going to affect the side hustle.

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So if you could pay your bills in a different way, if you could maybe have a job that doesn't require quite so much, and maybe it's not as exciting, but like we're paying rent and we can like fully put our heart and soul because we have the energy and a higher vibration to put into the dream, I think you'd be shocked at what would happen.

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The clarity and the sense of purpose and the real impact of our work happens when we start to strip things away, not when we add to them. I don't think that with all the responsibilities we have in this life that we can successfully try and build 10 completely different businesses at the same time. You have to pick one thing.

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There's a fantastic book that everybody should read. Honestly, everybody in your audience. It's very small, super easy to get through. It's The Dip by Seth Godin. It's so fantastic. If you find yourself in a season of, do I really want to do this? Should I keep going? Should I stay in this? Should I go?

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He gives this beautiful quote, which I reference in this book, is the opposite of quitting is not to continue to do the same thing. The opposite of quitting is recommitting with passion. So people find themselves and they're like, should I quit or should I keep going?

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But if you decide not to quit, the way that you come back and you add life to that and power to that is you're like, not only am I going to keep doing this thing because I believe in my dream and I believe in my company, I'm going to show up, but you recommit with passion. You're like, I'm all in. You get fired up. You remember your why. You show up for what you're trying to do.

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Because otherwise, you're going to be in the exact same spot questioning the exact same thing again next year.

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Because I think that the world teaches us that the answer to everything we're looking for is to add more things. The world's like, add a new house, get a new car, get a bigger job, make more money. And the older I get, the more I understand that the clarity and the sense of purpose and the real true impact of our work happens when we start to strip things away, not when we add to them.

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Make sure that you have something exciting to wake up for. Like I love coffee. So it's really easy for me to pop out of bed. Or if I have a new book that I'm reading, because I'm super nerdy, but if I have a new book that I'm reading that I feel like I'm learning a ton from, that'll get me out of bed.

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So, you know, if you have people in your community who are working on side hustles and Same with my peeps and whether it's at a book tour or maybe they call in to ask a question on the podcast, I will inevitably have people who are like, I really want to build my own company. I'm like, that's amazing. Tell me about it.

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And they're like, well, so I am a dog groomer, but also I am a wedding photographer. And also I bake cupcakes and also, and I'm like, yeah, no, you got to pick one. You have to pick one thing. I don't think that with all the responsibilities we have in this life that we can successfully try and build 10 completely different businesses at the same time.

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So this idea of what must you let go of, I ask myself at least once a month, and I encourage everybody to do this. to ask in order to be the best version of myself, what do I need to lose? What should not be here?

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Whether that's excuses, whether that's a habit, whether that's something you currently consume, whether that's, you know what, I need to stop trying to do 50 things and just go all in on one. What do you need to let go of is really powerful. It's like, girl, we are not asking you to add one more thing to your life. We're asking you to stop signing up for the class bake sale.

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Stop signing up to throw your cousin's baby shower. Stop saying yes to things you don't really want to do so that you can have as much time as possible to work on yourself or work on your dreams.

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Yeah, there's a fantastic author named Bob Goff. He's really like everyone's favorite grandpa, very, very wise. And he says he quits something every Thursday. He's like, Rach, I quit something every Thursday. Him and his assistant ask each other, what are you quitting today? I'm like, that is a lot of quitting. He's like, I know, but it really works. So they'll come up with these little habits.

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Have something that you're headed right into so that you've got a reason to meet your alarm where it meets you instead of hitting the snooze.

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It's more just like creating the intention of asking what should not be here. Especially if you built a business from the ground up It's amazing because it means you know how to do every part of your business. It's also so dangerous because you know how to do every part of your business. So it's so easy to be like, I can do that. I can figure that out. I'll write that. I'll post that.

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I'll do the thing. And it's not the best use of your time. What are the things that only you can do and only you should be doing? And if you teach yourself to ask what shouldn't be here, like if you brain dump, you take all the stuff that's in your head right now, write it down in a journal. You're like, I got to do all this stuff.

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The first thing to do is look at the brain dump and ask, what is not mine? What can I just absolutely delete? What can I delegate? And then once you've cleared that out of the way, you're like, okay, done. These six things, that's what I actually need to do. And I need to be better about pushing off the other stuff that should not be on my agenda.

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I'm sure you've read it, but Traction and Rocket Fuel are both such incredible books every entrepreneur needs to read.

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But the idea of having someone who can integrate your vision for you instead of you doing every single thing in the business to have someone who comes in operationally so that you can be the visionary and be the person who's imagining like where you're going to go and what you're going to do. It's really hard to teach ourselves because we're like, it's just faster if I do it.

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But what we accidentally do is also then teach our teams to function that way. So then you have someone who's your marketing head who's posting on social because they're like, well, I can just do it. But then they're not able to function at their highest level and give you the results that you're paying them for.

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So it's not just important that we lead ourselves, but it's also the reminder that how you function in your role, your team is watching you to understand how they're supposed to function in their role.

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So the big thing that is actually little is just asking yourself, are you giving way too much power and way too much energy to something that's really, truly not that big a deal? For instance, if we're speaking in terms of entrepreneurship, are you currently doing something and putting so much emphasis and so much time around this piece and

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And it actually isn't giving you the results that you think it is, or it's actually not that huge of a deal, but you're just so in the cycle, you can't step out of it. Or the example I use in the book is so silly, but going to concerts or vacations or traveling by myself is so normal that

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But I know a lot of women that that would be their worst nightmare to go to a concert alone or go on a vacation alone. They're like, I'd love to travel, but I don't have anyone to go with. And I'm like, well, if you can afford it, then go on the trip. Like, oh my God, I could never. And I'm like, okay, well, you're making a mountain out of a molehill. This is actually not that big a deal.

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I was on a podcast tour a couple of years ago and I would ask the audience, what's a crazy thing you've always wanted to do, but you tell yourself that's for other people. I'm not that kind of a girl. That's for other people. And the overwhelming response was get a tattoo. And I was like, girl, literally you could leave here tonight and go to a tattoo parlor and get like a dot.

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It doesn't have to be a big deal. And then all of a sudden, between one breath and the next, you are a person who has tattoos. You've done it. You've actually changed the way that you see yourself.

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So you have to be really careful in life that these things that have become really big tent poles or really big belief systems, every once in a while you need to like shake things up and ask, why do I believe that? Why am I so scared of this? Why do I keep doing the same thing? So what big thing is actually little?

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And then what little thing is actually big is really a call to understand how powerful we are as individual people. I don't care who you are listening to this, where this finds you today. I don't care how lost you feel or stuck you feel. You are powerful beyond measure. You have so much capability. You have so much potential. There's that great quote, which I'm going to mess up.

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If you truly understood how powerful you were, you would be shocked. So it's just a call to remember what is it that you are capable of? Are you truly living into your potential? If you get really honest with yourself, what percentage are you at right now?

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Yeah, I don't know if this is every entrepreneur. I sort of think it is. A lot of my friends who are in the space or who are entrepreneurs, I feel like every five to seven years, there starts to be a shift. Or if there's not, I think the work begins to feel a bit stale. Especially if you're an entrepreneur, you're a risk taker, you're ambitious, you're competitive.

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If 100% is you showing up as the best version of you every day, if you were being really honest with yourself, what's your percentage rating today? And again, that's not to make you feel shame. It's more just give yourself the knowledge. You don't have to change anything today. But if you have the information, if you're like, you know what, if I'm being totally honest, I'm giving 70%.

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I have more to give. I think I'm going to get the percentage wrong. But David Goggins, this really famous ultra runner says, when you feel tired for the first time on a run, you're really only at like 40%. Which is so crazy, but I'm a long distance runner. I cannot tell you how often I've been on a run and I'm like, I'm tired. And then I hear David Goggins say like, you're only at 40%.

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I'm like, okay, let's go.

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Yeah, exactly. So just asking yourself these questions gives you some more information for where could you put a little bit more effort in? Where do you need to challenge your limiting beliefs so that you can move further along this year?

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When I was younger, I used to think that everything, like all of our success was wrapped in our imagination. Like how big could we dream and what was possible and how hard were we willing to work? And I have learned over time that it really isn't about your dreams. It's about your standards. It is what is the minimum standard for your life that allows you to grow.

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So it's not in the book I say, it's not about expanding your ceiling. It's about raising your floor. Because if you elevate, if you draw a line in the sand and you say, I will never go backwards. I will never be that person again. I will never smoke another cigarette or drink too much tequila.

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I'm trying to think of leverage points in my life where I like, you know, I got sick because I had too much Jose Cuervo. And then the next day I was like, I can never have tequila again. It was like a very definitive line in the sand.

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But if you could approach habits that way, if you could approach conversations with yourself that way, if you could be that hardcore about, you know what, I am never going to commit to this kind of thing again, or I'm never going to allow myself to be spoken to this way again. If you can raise your floor and

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If you can raise your standards, then you actually get closer to the ceiling without the ceiling needing to break. So now we're actually achieving more and we're setting a new level for ourselves because we're not backtracking. I think most of us can get really excited because it's the new year. They're really excited because we've just celebrated a big birthday.

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We can get pumped up and motivate ourselves to go do something big that pushes us closer to our goals and dreams because of what's going on in our life. That's easy. The question is, can you do it next Tuesday? Can you do it when life gets hard? Can you do it when you get punched in the stomach? Can you do it when your girlfriend breaks up with you?

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Can you keep doing the thing even when you don't want to? That's a standard. Years ago, one of the women in my community was going through something really hard. I ran into her at like an airport or something. And she said, I do all the things you say because I'm big on morning routine and the habits that you have in your day.

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And so I think you're always looking around for what's happening in the market and how you might move with what's going on. So I actually started, my very first business was as an event planner. In Los Angeles, I started planning weddings and bought mitzvahs.

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So she's like, you know, I drink the water and I get up early and I'm doing gratitude and whatever. But my mom... has cancer. I don't know how I'm supposed to keep trying to like add to my life and do all these things that I used to be excited about when I'm going through something hard.

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And I was like, oh no, I don't think that we build habits so that we can keep expanding when life is hard because life will absolutely be hard. I think we build great habits so that when life kicks the crap out of us, we don't lose all of the traction we've gained. So we're like, okay, I'm not expansive right now, but by God, I'm also not backtracking. I'm going to just minimum effective dose.

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I'm going to keep showing up in the same ways you build those great habits when you can so that they're there when you need them. It's not about doing more. It's about raising your floor.

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This is for anybody, because this used to be me, where you've started and stopped a lot of dreams. You've started and stopped a lot of health plans, exercise regimens. You've tried to quit smoking a million times. For anybody who's started and stopped and it hasn't stuck, you've actually created a pattern in your psychology that says that you're a quitter.

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You're like, well, you know, I try and then I quit. And every time you quit, it reinforces the belief that you have that you are a quitter. It's why the line in the sand is so freaking powerful because you're like, but I stuck with something. I didn't quit on this one thing.

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So one of my favorite things to encourage people to do is to give up one thing that you currently consume, alcohol, cigarettes, binge watching TV until 2 a.m. and messing up your sleep schedule. Anything that you currently consume that you know is not good for you. Doesn't matter what it is. Everyone will have something that pops into their head.

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If I just stopped doing this thing, I would feel better. I don't even care if you replace the thing with a different thing. It's just for 30 days, can you commit to not consuming that one habit? And if you do, at the end of those 30 days, you're like, oh, dude, I can keep a promise to myself. I can keep my word.

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And then I slowly moved into getting to do corporate events, getting to work on movie premieres and press junkets and working in the entertainment industry. And then in 2007, 2008, I kept hearing about this thing called a blog. Everyone was blogging. I didn't really know what that meant. So I just started to blog.

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We will keep our words and our commitment to every single person in our life and break the promise we made to ourself. So just for 30 days, if you can do something, you will shift the way that you see yourself. It literally doesn't matter what it is. It just matters that you keep your honor in this pact you've made with yourself.

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Oh my gosh. I used to beat myself up like I think a lot of people for not being where I wanted to be, for not winning every single time, for not knocking it out of the park. And honestly...

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I think most of us have experience with this, that you're like, I can either look at these losses as an example of why I shouldn't keep going and why I'm not who I thought I was, or I can gain as much information as possible out of this lived experience, and I can use it to help myself move to the next level. So it's not a question of did you win or you lose?

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It's a question of did you win or you learn? Because... As we're going through this, you are going to fail. I cannot stress this to you enough. You're going to lose money. You're going to lose time. You're going to piss people off. You're going to make mistakes. You're going to hire the wrong person probably over and over and over because just every entrepreneur I know has that story.

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It's part of the process. But if you can ask yourself, if you have the courage to look at what has happened and ask yourself, okay, what went wrong? How could we do that better next time? How was I responsible for this? How were they responsible for this? Okay, we're moving forward with this information. Then suddenly you're empowered. You're not like the loser who keeps messing up.

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You're like, oh, I keep trying stuff. And in trying stuff, I'm going to make mistakes and I'm going to learn as I go. I heard once that when you can remember something that used to make you emotional and it doesn't make you emotional anymore, it's now wisdom.

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So when you can look at, you know, I'm sure, Holly, you have an experience in your business where you're like, oh, I can't believe I did that. The minute that you can get to a place where you can look at that with acceptance, you're like, yeah, I did the best I could. I didn't know better. Now I do. But it doesn't make you upset anymore. That is like chef's kiss. That is the goal.

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And as we grow in our entrepreneurial careers, the faster we can get to that, like the quicker we can get to the postmortem, like looking at what happened and not being emotional about it. Oh my gosh. It is the biggest unlock because now you can move faster than the competition because you're not obsessing over the things you did wrong. You're like, yes. And where are we going from here?

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I would literally write about what I ate for dinner last night and I just kept putting it out. And I had an intern one day that said, you know, blog's actually supposed to be about something, right? And I was like, oh, thank you. So I started to blog about events and how you could host events in your home and set a beautiful table.

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This one I actually heard very early in my entrepreneurial career. I used to go to any conference I could go to, and I really hope your listeners try this as much as you can. Go listen to other successful entrepreneurs talk about their life.

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Now you've got so much access with podcasts and YouTube, but being in person and listening to someone share their story, even if they're not in your industry, is just, oh, it's so helpful. So I got to hear Mariam Nafisi, who founded Minted. This was eons ago, very early in their career. And Minted started as a website for artists to show their paintings off or something.

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It was not at all what it is today. And she said this line I never forgot, which was follow the signs of life. So she's like, we launched this company. We were so excited and it just did not work. And she had gotten like investment money and everyone was freaking out and it was .com era. So everything should work, but this website was not working.

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And just month after month after month, it was failing. And she was like, okay, is any part of this site working? And I'm gonna botch this story, but it's some version of this. She's like, is any part of this website working? They look in the backend and they see that there's this one thing, an artist was putting their art on stationery and they were like selling the stationery.

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No one was buying the paintings, but this one artist or this handful of artists, the stationery was selling. It was the only part of the business that was working, but we saw that and we were like, okay, Could we take artists' work and put it on more stationary? Might that be a thing? And of course, then that was the foundation of Minted and it's very successful and all these years later, so big.

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But it happened because they were looking at what was working And trying to figure out how to expand on that. So in the business, it doesn't matter what industry you're in. It's so easy to get bogged down in like, this is the way we've always done things. Or assuming that you know how the audience is finding you or assuming that you know the data.

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You have to actually know what's working unemotionally. You know, if you're looking in the back and you're like, wow, this is crazy. So many people are listening to this kind of podcast episode or so many people are buying only this product. So pay attention to what's working in your business. Pay attention to what's working in your life.

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And slowly but surely, I kept figuring that out and figuring it out. And then one day a brand reached out and said, posts. And I will never forget, it was Eggland's Best Eggs. And they offered me $250. And I was like, I am rich. And this is a business. And I realized that there was, I mean, now it's so common, but back then we didn't really know what we were doing.

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When you're going through your day, which parts of your day feel really good? Are there friends or relationships in your life that... really pump you up? Are there friends or relationships that really drain you? Okay, some part of that equation is not working. So how do we put more energy and our own life into the parts that work?

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If you, as entrepreneurs have not studied Pareto principle or the 80-20 principle, it's such a game changer in understanding the idea that a small amount of your effort actually equates to a very big return. The problem is we're doing 100 things, and we don't know which of the 100 are giving us the results.

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When you can start to identify which things are actually working, you can pour more gasoline on that, and then you start to get these exponential results without exponential effort.

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Yeah. Yeah.

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know where the highest revenue comes from. So I know we're at the end, but let me give you this like bit of wisdom because it was huge for me. So I told you all that I started as a wedding planner back in the day. And I used to advertise on a website called The Knot, which was like, probably still is the place to get clients if you're a wedding planner.

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And it costs a lot of money to do that advertising. And I would, at the end of the year, you know, oh, I made this money and I go on with my life. And I went to one of these business conferences and I heard someone talk about margin, which truly I did not know about what margin was.

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And so I went home that day and I made a list of all the clients that I had and how much money I had made and the margin on each of them. And then I put where I got that business from. And when I looked at that list, I was shocked to discover that all of my highest revenue, like the best margin, best budget clients came from one person. They did not come from the website.

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They did not come from advertising. They came from a photographer. this high-end photographer who only had high-end clients. So when she referred them to me, I knew that they were people who had a budget to afford me and they ended up just being a better clientele overall.

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So the next year I stopped spending money on the website and just absolutely kissed up to this one photographer and bought her gifts, took her to lunch, spa days. And I did the same for some other vendors and I saw my business explode and my revenue explode. So the best piece of advice I could give you about profit is know where the best clients are actually coming from. So good.

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I think it really has to be about checking in with yourself about what success looks like this year or this quarter, because it really does change as we get older. And it really does change as you have more responsibility, whether that's employees or family who is counting on you. And you have to keep checking in with what matters, right?

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And it's so, so easy to get caught in the race of trying to one-up people or compete on social media or how many followers do you have? And at the end of the day, we can achieve success in the eyes of the world and live a life that's completely bankrupt and absent of joy. And I really want to find a balance. When I was younger, I was a workaholic. My early entrepreneurial career was just nonstop.

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there comes a point where a toll will be paid. And usually, especially for women, but this happens with men too, the toll is paid in our health. We start to experience health problems. We start to get anxiety. We start to get just all kinds of things go wrong because we are so good at forcing ourselves to keep up with the hustle. We don't take time to decompress. We don't take time for self-care.

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We're stressed to the max. And so that is gonna cost something. So as I've gotten older, I've learned, yeah, I want to be very successful. I want to make a lot of money. I got four kids. I want to live a beautiful life. But simultaneously, it can't come at the cost of my health or my peace. I have to balance both areas.

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So we just started to build a company around having a website that brands wanted to be a part of. And if we could just create content that was really, really good, that maybe people would pay to get in front of our audience. So I did that for a while, built that up to a place I was really proud of it.

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If you like a podcast, I also have a podcast. I tend to talk more about holistic success. So that's the Rachel Hollis podcast and you can grab my books anywhere books are sold and I'm on social media.

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You're so welcome. Thank you for having me.

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And then because I was writing every day for the blog, started to dream about writing my own book. I've always been a book nerd. I've wanted to be an author since I was a little girl. And so I was like, okay, I'm just going to try this. And I published my first book in 2014. And, you know, like five people cared.

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I wasn't an overnight success by any stretch of the imagination, but I just kept writing. I'd come out with a book every year. And on my sixth book, which was in 2018, I wrote a book called Girl, Wash Your Face, which unbeknownst to me or anybody else in the entire world became this runaway success. And it really launched my career in personal development.

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Stop saying yes to things you don't really want to do so that you can have as much time as possible to work on yourself or work on your dreams. It really isn't about your dreams, it's about your standards. If you can raise your floor, if you can raise your standards, then you actually get closer to the ceiling without the ceiling needing to break.

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I never, I cannot even believe that this is my career, to be honest with you, Hala. But yeah, I just tend to, I think, move at the risk of being a hippie, like move with flow and move with where I feel like I'm being guided. And then I test stuff. If it's just easy to move into it, I expand with what's going on. So my career has had a lot of different...

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versions of itself, but the entrepreneurial spirit is at the core of everything. So it's one thing to be interested in a certain kind of content, but to figure out how to monetize that in a big way is the key. And I think as long as I have done it, I've kept the same customer base. So the woman who was reading my blog in 2008 is the same woman who reads my books and listens to my podcast today.

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There is no such thing as an overnight success. I cannot tell you how many journalists, when I came out with Girl, Stop Apologizing, which followed Girl, Wash Your Face, were like, oh my gosh, are you so excited to have your second book out? And I was like, this is my seventh. So part of what I think happened there is something that happens a lot with athletes at the highest level.

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I am obsessed with athletes. I'm not obsessed with sports. I don't really know a lot about sports, but I'm so curious about the athletes, the Olympians. How do they make themselves do the same thing over and over at the highest level and get the best results again and again? Because essentially as an entrepreneur, that's what we're asking of ourselves. So I'm obsessed with this question.

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And one of the themes that I've seen over and over is that athletes at the high levels fall in love with the grind. They're in love with the process. They're in love with how do I make this better by the tiniest millisecond? So for me, I really think a big part of this success was I wasn't trying to be successful. I just really liked writing books. I liked writing and I was trying to get better.

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And that was my only goal was I thought, well, if you read my first book and you read my third book, As a reader, would you think I had improved as a writer? That's all I was trying to do. And Girl, Wash Your Face was honestly, I think, a fluke in a lot of ways. I actually think my ability to write fiction is why I have success in the personal development space.

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because my audience are not people who self-identify as personal development nerds. It's not like Tony Robbins' entire audience goes over to me. I was speaking to women who maybe had never considered personal development before. They might not even have ever gone to therapy. They really had not considered these things at all.

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So I think my ability to storytell and explain how I went through it and how it was helpful, that really was a massive unlock that wasn't in the space. Because I didn't really know how to be a personal development writer, I think that I brought something to it that maybe didn't exist before. But gosh, I cannot stress that enough to any of your listeners.

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It really is an overnight success after working at it for a decade. It's like what we do in the dark that gets celebrated in the light. Nobody's going to cheer for you. Nobody's going to be there like rooting you on, especially at the hardest moments.

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the process enough to keep going because you know, you don't know when, but you know at some point you're going to get the results that you're striving for.

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That's great.

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Yeah. And I think going back to that idea of the audience, if you figured out your customer base, if you figured out your audience, and even as you were changing the format of your show, you were learning how to do a show. You were learning how to be better. You were learning how to tell jokes or do an interview. So nothing is wasted. Nothing is lost.

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It's so easy to look at social media and see everybody else crossing the finish line and feel like you are not far enough along in your race. But like it's all stacking on top of each other to lead you where you're supposed to go. So just stick with it.

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914.522

Yeah. So we didn't have that word influencer. It's so common now, but you didn't call it that. I knew a lot of women like me who had websites where they created content. You were a mommy blogger. I remember that term. Yeah, like we just... created this content based on whatever we were interested in. Like Joy Cho with Oh Joy did something very different than I did on my site.

Young and Profiting with Hala Taha (Entrepreneurship, Sales, Marketing)

Rachel Hollis: Reinvent Yourself After Failure and Build a Business That Lasts | Entrepreneurship | E350

939.541

And it changed based on whatever your interests were. But then brands wanted our audience. And you have to remember, social media did not exist back then like it does today. We had Facebook, but even then we didn't really know what we were doing with Facebook. So many of these brands wanted access to people who were devout followers.

Young and Profiting with Hala Taha (Entrepreneurship, Sales, Marketing)

Rachel Hollis: Reinvent Yourself After Failure and Build a Business That Lasts | Entrepreneurship | E350

959.857

I mean, they would check in every day to see what you wrote about. They'd share it with their friends. And so- we didn't know what to charge. We didn't know what that was worth. And I think probably we all charged way too little for the amount of access we were giving away or what they were able to get out of it. But we really were, it felt like the Wild West of doing branded content for people.

Young and Profiting with Hala Taha (Entrepreneurship, Sales, Marketing)

Rachel Hollis: Reinvent Yourself After Failure and Build a Business That Lasts | Entrepreneurship | E350

982.188

But it was fun and we were figuring it out. And if I could go back in time, I'm sure I would approach it so differently. But I'm sure there are versions of this today of being in an industry that's either coming up for the first time or maybe shifting so quickly that you feel like you're building the airplane while you're flying it through the air.

Appearances

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

The Game with Alex Hormozi

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha

Young and Profiting (YAP) with Hala Taha