Patrick McKnight
Appearances
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
Honestly, most of my life.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
I can't give you an exact number. It's somewhere between 1,000 and 3,000.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
How many are in your house? So in the house, we only have two. We have two little geckos. They used to just have three. And then, a friend of theirs asked if they could take another one in. The friend didn't mention the size. He's probably about 180 pounds at this point. He's big.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
That is more or less the exact... Tortoises do technically fall under the turtle family. And so if you were to call a tortoise a turtle, it is technically correct. People get a little bent out of shape, but it is what it is. But yeah, basically, if it likes to go in the water, it's a turtle. And if it doesn't want to touch water, it's a tortoise.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
And if something gets in the way of them walking in the perimeter, they're like tiny tanks, and they're not going to slow down or... you know, halt too much. They're going to try and brute force their way through. And so, you know, whether that be a chair or a wall, whatever it is, if it's in their way and they're not happy about it, they're going to try and get through it.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
And so, you know, you'll see pictures or videos of them, you know, all but walking through, you know, drywall and things like that, just punching their way through because it kind of got in the way.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
And we're like, oh, great. And we kind of figured the tortoises had broken, you know, had a prison break at that point.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
And I was like, oh, man, this can't be good. And I walk in and I see the horror scene.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
It's most likely one of two things. Either A, he got himself kind of stuck and literally just brute-forced his way unstuck, and the toilet was an unfortunate casualty. Or, occasionally... These guys will see things that are of similar size to them as threats, and they will actually attack them and start headbutting them.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
I've seen him do it to, you know, furniture outside and boxes and stuff like that. So it's entirely possible that he felt the toilet was an invader in his home and decided to knock it over and beat it up.
Criminal
Turtle vs. Toilet, a Monster in the Closet, and a Surprise Possum
So fortunately, my wife has friends with a local zoo here in Richmond. And so currently that's where he's going to head. If we pass away, you know, the plan is for him to go live at a zoo. Being in the reptile community in general, though, I have a significant amount of friends that have both the space and the skill set to be able to take care of them. It's an adventure, to say the least.