Jeff Guenther
Appearances
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
I respect that. Do what you got to do to get through this very difficult time.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
I think the problem might be you asking yourself how you're going to get through the next four years. Because the answer is, I have no fucking idea. We don't know what the next four years are going to be. It could be total chaos and destruction and horrible shit. Or it could be some of the Democrats holding strong and being able to affect some sort of change. I have no idea.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
So the question probably is... How do you get through today? And how do you process your grief and your upset? I think that there's like, for me personally, I'm still in the like shock and denial part of the grief where I sometimes go into like the pain and guilt and the anger and bargaining. There's still a part of me that's just like, no, this didn't happen.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Like somehow like Russia got us again. Right. Like this, this makes absolutely no sense. So first just honor the grief and the sadness and feel your feelings. I know I sound like a total fucking cliche of a therapist right now, but we all say that for.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
It could be all your fault, and I would love to blame you for this.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I started to think that somehow this is my fault, and I'm on the wrong timeline. I tripped up into the wrong parallel universe, because there is a universe where Kamala... Harris did win, and why aren't I there? What the fuck is going on? I allowed myself to 100% believe that Harris was going to win this.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
I fell down that deep, specific TikTok rabbit hole where there was a bunch of creators who were just like, these are the reasons she's going to win. It's going to be okay. And I allowed myself to hope that And I think that's something else that you and maybe other people need to do is admit that there was a part of you that was hopeful that you thought she was going to win.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Allow yourself to like, you know, hope is life changing. Hope is what gives us fuel to get through the day. But a lot of people that felt hopeful are looking back and they're just like, why would I have done this to myself? I should have known better. I should have prepared for the worst case scenario. But it reminds me of people that are in relationships and they're like, you know what?
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
I pre-grieved this relationship. So when we break up, I'm going to be totally fucking fine. Like, no, babe. You can't grieve the relationship until it's actually over. You can't prepare for this moment until it actually happens.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Yes. And also be with community. Be with people that you love and that you trust and that are feeling the same feelings that you're feeling. Go ahead and also like check out fucking AOC's Instagram and TikTok where she talks to you for 52 minutes. Go ahead and watch all the late-night shows and have Jon Stewart or Seth Meyers or Colbert soothe you as you fall asleep.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Do whatever you can to take care of yourself. Self-care and community care is the most important thing right now. Know that you're going to have to fight the good fight and get out there and organize and march and do all the things. But right now, I just want you to think of what's the next – right thing for you to do. And it might be staying in bed and being on your phone all day.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
They have not taken away staying in bed and being on your phone all day, which I love, which is my number one coping device. But really, think about the next thing, just getting through today. That's sort of also what people learn when they go into rehabilitation. We're focusing on the next thing, whether it's the next minute, the next hour, or the next 24 hours. That's all we're doing.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Yeah, we did. It's a real slap in the face when Donald Trump wins with these margins in all seven swing states. There was something that was like, oh, okay, this is clarity for me. I am pissed and sad and upset because And this is the country I live in. And this is fucking crazy. I didn't think it was. I thought that she was going to win by a landslide.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
I was making bets on those stupid fucking betting sites of Kamala's going to win. I was so excited. And I was crushed. So just feel your feelings. Feel the grief. Think on the next choice.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
No, it wasn't Harris. But, you know, and maybe you've heard this, like every government leader around the world that was in power during COVID was voted out. Right. Not COVID, but inflation. So every person in power. And so that's what happened to Kamala, that the price of fucking eggs and milk was too much for everyone to take, and they think that Trump is going to make it actually go lower.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
I'm going to be paying attention to those fucking prices of eggs and milk and posting about that shit every goddamn day. I can't wait to fucking do that. Eggs are so expensive that I want fascism. Yeah, I don't think there was anything we could have done. Well, yeah, in hindsight, it doesn't look like there was anything we could have done.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Whatever you need to do right now is the right thing to do, right? Do radical self-care. However you want to self-care yourself, it's totally fine.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
I 100% endorse that. And understand that you're in grief right now. And grief, as a therapist, when I treat a client that's going through grief, whether it's breakup grief or your parent died grief or The election was a total clusterfuck grief. It is one of the most complicated emotions to treat.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
And every therapist will say this, that it's a top three, very difficult one to treat because there's like a ton of different feelings that are attached to grief. And you're going like from feeling to different feeling to different feeling all day long. And it changes. Sometimes it's like acceptance and hope. Sometimes it's the upward turn. Sometimes it's reconstruction.
Savage Lovecast
Savage Lovecast Episode 941
Sometimes it's pain and guilt. Anger and bargaining. And that shit changes all the fucking time. So you have to allow a bunch of space in your heart, in your head, in your mind for you to go through all of these feelings and these emotions. You will get through it emotionally. There's another fight to fight. Get ready for that when that starts.