Eli
Appearances
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
I mean, we got a few small boxes of stuff. There were some beautiful paintings and stuff that never got back. I remember that. And, you know, there was a period when Jake would say to the attorney, I'm not getting, I refuse until she does that. I'm like, Jake, it's gone. Forget it. You have no power here. You know, he's still upset about it. Some of the stuff has some real emotional value.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
A painting by Tony Curtis of Marilyn Monroe. I mean, that was pretty cool.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
I don't remember what she was asking for, but, you know, it was like all sorts of like this little nickel and dimey stuff. You know, he had an Alexa and she wanted wanted him to return the Alexa, you know, and stuff like that. In the end, I wrote a check for 300 bucks for her to buy a new Alexa. OK, we finally had it like she wouldn't let go of the Alexa. You really want the three year old Alexa?
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
He wasn't capable of doing anything without asking someone. He had no control of his hands. So any letter, any email that got sent, somebody did it for him on the computer or on his iPad. I remember, I mean, you just start learning the system, you know, phone calls to different places and can you help? And so many false leads where you think like, Oh, I found the people. They can help.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
And you get there, and you don't qualify. You're not sick enough. You're not poor enough. We only do people who are, you know, right-handed or left-handed. You know, it's just, boy, what a nightmare. I mean, it took months.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
So the rules on how the government pays is that if you're in a facility, the facility gets your monthly check and then the facility gives you $70 a month for incidentals. What happened was that Elle had been his representative payee. And then when he went into the hospital in Western Mass, she never signed over to them like that they could be the payee.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
But she was then obligated to give them a check. for the full amount less $70. The government, they sent the check to the hospital, but the hospital couldn't keep the money because she hadn't signed off. They weren't legally allowed to put it into their account like they had to put it in a holding account.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
And so after I came back into the scene, basically Jake filled out a form saying that I was his new rep payee, but he couldn't use his hands. But we managed to go through the paperwork of that. So I became the rep payee.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
They started billing me from July. And so I wrote them a check, but they never billed me for May and June. And then, like, a few months later, I got a bill for June. I remember calling them. I go, what about May? Well, nobody went through May.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
And so for Jake's benefit, we kept that money to help pay for his groceries.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
9: Signed, Sealed, Silenced
So he was at Tewksbury and he really hated it. They all said he's horrible to everybody here. And here you're disabled. You're in bed. You can't get up. You can't do anything. So you're compensating. You're highly demanding. You want everybody to serve you. You know, he did the best he could with that stuff.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I remember getting me into the house up these icy stairs. I mean, I almost got dropped and rolled out of the gurney and I'm on this ventilator. And there's like, I don't know, 30 of her friends, a couple of the bridesmaids from my wedding were there. And, you know, I can't move or signal I'm in this breathing machine. I think it was a sad, uncomfortable, and confusing vibe in there.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I don't know how I felt. I felt like, why is there a party happening? I just want to die and go away.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
When she wasn't in my hospital room, regardless of where that happened to be, she would set up cameras where she could do check-ins. So I was aware she was doing Amazon and Echo. So like on the Echo shows, they have cameras where you can do drop-ins. So she was able to...
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
hit a button on her app, and it would open up the camera into my room, and a little red light would turn on, and it freaked the nurses out. And then I also heard there was some nanny spy cams, kind of like teddy bear cameras, which is a no-no in hospital world's
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I heard her speaking. I wasn't sure if it was the teddy bear or the Amazon devices, but I would hear her voice be like, don't do that or he needs this or like whatever. And it would scare the nurses. And there was a button you could hit for like do not serve. And they started to do that when they would hear these voices. And I just remember her coming in the hospital and
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
kind of like freaking out on them never to touch that button. It didn't feel concerning in that moment at all. It was just like, I always thought going through that it was for my best interest. But nowadays, I don't think it was for me. I think it was for her and control. But at the time, again, it didn't. Yeah, I don't know.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I'm still like fucked up in my own head because I'm like, did I think this way because I was so blinded by the love I fell for her at that time or what? But yeah, it was always like I was trying to do whatever would make her feel okay.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I wanted to get out of there. I had this complex surgery, which brought me into Mass General. Mass General wanted to send me back to Tewksbury. I was like, no, absolutely not. Hell no. The only way they would let me leave to go back to the community is if I was able to find my own aides, because I needed 24-hour care.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
So when I was on hospice and isolated, just me and my wife, I started hearing her talk to herself. She would just be rambling on and on about her day and things that pissed her off. And when she'd be like cleaning me, changing me, she said... You know, honey, you know how I always wanted a baby? Well, now I got my own 100-pound baby. Obviously, I'm not 100 pounds anymore, but I was.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Another thing she would say, which first time I thought it was kind of funny, humorous, because I had dark humor. She would say, I always wanted a husband that could not talk back. And then she kept saying it. And that's when, what's that movie? The movie Misery. I was like, oh my God, she has lost her mind. I'm like stuck in misery, but that guy could talk and kind of move. Not me.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
So it's very scary. So these were the strange admissions I heard. How she always wanted a baby and now that she has her own 100-pound baby. And she always wanted a husband that could not talk back.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
So luckily, this was during COVID lockdown, so all these people that worked in hospitals So to be clear, not everyone was a trained medical professional. I asked Jake how many aides he had and did it take a few people before he finally found his core group? I only had four. Those four were my people.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Mother-in-law at the time, Cindy, after Al broke, well, didn't break it off, but she like stopped coming around. And when I said, I love you, kind of hung up the phone and I filed for divorce and she got really angry and it was a battle. Her mother secretly visited me and talked to me, like, all the time.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Actually, that's the only reason I have any photos in that video of me dying in the hospital. That's from her. This goes all the way to when I can verbally speak again, and the divorce is starting to get real heated up. And Eli's back in my life and we'd have like different visiting times. And she said this one thing to me. I was like, I don't know why Ellen is, is acting like this.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
She goes, well, honey, think about it. Your life is getting a lot better and her life is getting a lot worse. And I was thinking about that last night, and I'm like, in the scheme of things at that time, like, my life was no picnic. And it still isn't, quite frankly. But that was odd, and then it was hard for me.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I was like, Cindy, I have a lot of love for you, but I think we shouldn't speak anymore until the divorce is final. And she started crying. And she was like, I want to still be in your life. And I'm like, just until the divorce is final. And then I'll reach out. And I did reach out. I mean, I don't know if I ever told you this. But before we were married, we were all the time.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Cindy would call me and be like, can you tell Ellen to please unblock me? Like that's how enraged she would get. And she'd block her own mom. So the fact that Cindy would come and visit me, she knew she was really betraying her doctor's trust. But I was thinking last night, that is a weird thing to say to someone who's still bedridden.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Your life's getting so much better and hers is getting so much worse. I mean, I know very little about her when I think about everything as a whole now. It's like I fell in love and we never spent a day apart and we were married like three to five months later. That's crazy. It's not crazy, but yeah. Okay, maybe it's crazy. It can end good too, but it didn't end good for me.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Well, I guess in the scheme of things, it did. I'm reconnecting with people. I'm starting to put pieces together like a puzzle. And I had a crazy thought and theory about how maybe she had something to do with my hospitalization.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
The more I started talking to people and hearing these things that were happening not in the room I was in, that theory started to go from crazy to closer to a possibility. And then, unprovoked, I get a message from a guy. Who happened to have the same theory?
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I know a lot of people get ones that they only have for like four days and have to find a new one. I had four, two in the day, two for overnights. So yeah, my doctor, good old Dr. Levinson was like, I will only sign off on this if you have money for the apartment, money in the account. And the state will only pay 58 hours a week. And forgive me on the math, but 7 times 24 is a lot.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
So I had to find an hourly rate for 100 and change hours. I reached out to Eli. Eli was like, this is obviously a large amount of money. He's like, how long do you think this will take you? And I'm like, honestly, I don't know. I'm like, but I'm going to get better. Give me like four or five months and I won't need 24 hour care. And he's like, you know, what if, what if it takes longer?
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
And I'm like, put me back in a nursing home. I'm going to get better. So we reached out to about 12 other people. They all made certain dollar amount commitments and it was a little scrappy, but we got the money in the county.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Imagine you have a newborn baby. Everything you have to do for them. Getting me up. Getting me dressed. Putting on my socks. Brushing my teeth. Feeding me. Transferring me onto the toilet. Even wiping my ass. Showering me. Picking me up off the ground when I made a boo-boo, which only happened once or twice. As well as, like, grocery shopping.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
taking me to medical appointments, doing my physical and occupational and speech therapy homework, scheduling. If I had to write something down, they'd write something down for me. Recording videos that you may have seen on my social media. Everything. I was bedridden, and I was out of the hospital. I could finally get this next level of care. And guess what? I came off 24-hour care.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I did that in four months. I just knew what would happen. I knew the dollars were ending. I was like, I gotta do this. Not that I was not motivated without that, but, you know, it's like do or die. It's always been do or die for me.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
So I'm on the partner shuttle bus, which runs in between MGH, Master General Brigham, Spalding, and the bus breaks down, and I get out. It was the first time I kind of looked around. I see this high-rise, and it says, moving today, three months free, and I was like,
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
free that sounds really good so I was like we'll meet in there we go in there still COVID lockdown bunch of people in masks they're very happy they're like what do you need and I'm like uh accessible and affordable and this place didn't look affordable at all it's like well we got one place it's got kind of a bad view I'm like again I haven't showered in like three months and he's like well you smell great and I'm like thanks
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
and he showed me this place it worked it turned out with the three months free to be cheaper than the inaccessible spot i was playing for so it was like a no-brainer i just moved here and that's how i ended up here and how you saw me shaking like a leaf in the elevator
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Eli was helping me write letters in the kind of infancy of my recovery or email. And I was like skeptical, but I knew I wanted to. I just needed time. He was very respectful of that, you know, regardless what he was feeling inside. I think the first time I saw him was at Mass General Hospital, and he just came to visit me. I just felt, I felt kind of uncomfortable.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
There was this, like, awkwardness because I knew, or I kind of knew what he was going through, like, watching me die. I could only imagine his wife died, his dog died. But yeah, just took it slow. And it was like, you know, felt like we kind of picked up where we left off in a way. And not really going into any details of like, that was really hard watching you storm. Or are you divorced?
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
Or any of that. It was just like, how you been? You know, casual talk, normal talk.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
I was working on a book proposal. I was just like doing interviews like this with people. And I was like, hey dad, can we put on the GoPro and let me just like ask you some things? And he was like, yeah. And that was the first time on a live recorded interview we really went into it. And I'm just kind of like... Okay.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
He never pried and felt the need to be like, and this happened, and this, and this. That's just who he is. He's not trying to overwhelm people's stuff. And probably he's like, well, my son's ready to ask me about whatever I'll tell him. And that's how it went.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
11. One-Hundred Pound Baby
When Jake began to recover, a photograph was shared with him showing this exact moment. And then my mother-in-law sent me this picture. And I was like...
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
7: The Resurrection of Jake
He didn't respond for quite some time. I was in this seminar, a thing they called Family Constellations. I don't know if you're into this kind of stuff, but okay, so you go and there's this energy thing and you know, it's a room full of people and different people get up and they go through these energy processes and so forth. So they only do a couple each time and it was my first time ever and
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
7: The Resurrection of Jake
Ich habe mich gehalten und sie haben mich angerufen und ich habe dieses ganze Familie-Konstellation-Ding gemacht mit mir und meinem Vater und seinem Vater und all diesen Energie-Ding und Max. Ich glaube nicht, dass Jake da war, ich wusste nur nicht, wer die Spieler waren.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
7: The Resurrection of Jake
Und dann setzte ich mich auf und dann gingen wir auf Pause und ich schaute mein Telefon an und Jake hat angerufen.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
7: The Resurrection of Jake
Wir haben dieses ganze Familienenergie-Ding gemacht, okay? Und ich habe mit Jake wiedergelebt. Ich meine, unglaublich. Du weißt, Leute finden tolle Veränderungen, die passieren, nachdem sie durch diesen Prozess gehen. Eli und Jake's two stepsisters, Sophie and Katie, drove to Western Massachusetts Hospital to visit Jake.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
7: The Resurrection of Jake
It's brutal, unpredictable and sometimes it hits him like a fork to the nuts.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
We were pretty active in our synagogue, and he had a bunch of friends that were from there, or their parents were there. We would let him have parties at the house, and he always had, like, a ton of people there. So it was clear that he had a good social life. And they were good kids. You could have an intelligent conversation with them, and they were just nice people.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
I didn't know at the time that he was supplying them all with, you know, pot and oxycodone or whatever, but okay, you know. They seemed to like him for himself.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
He was very dedicated to her. She became a freshman. She was kind of getting into the college life. And Jake was a chef and he wasn't kind of doing the college thing. So they kind of drifted apart. And I think he was kind of heartbroken. I think he was really attached. And it made me realize that Jake likes to have a steady. He likes that connection and that sort of permanence.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
I met Jake because I started dating his mom. I went to a party at their house and she catered it. The food was good and, you know, I thought she was pretty gorgeous. And so I asked her out. Well, it wasn't quite that easy. Somehow this mutual friend set me up with a different girlfriend of hers who was good friends with his mom. And I went out on a date with her, but I wasn't really into her.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
And so I told her that I was kind of into Marjorie. And so she was gracious and told Marjorie. And I guess Marjorie thought that it would be good to go out with me because she actually called me and said, so? Like, so when are you going to call? You know? And so then we started going out. And Jake was like four. And I had two kids who were six and four. And things moved along pretty quickly.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
And then we wound up moving in together and getting married and having another kid. She had a three-bedroom house. There were two big bedrooms upstairs and a little bedroom downstairs. She had one big bedroom. Jake had the other big bedroom. And then my two kids shared the little one. That's the way it goes, you know. And then we got married and bought a house and went from there.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
I mean, it was really cute. They actually got along great, really well. As a matter of fact, they got along so well that we hardly saw them because they were just having such a good time. We had another child. His name was Max. Max was a wonderful, smart kid, a little bit kind of off the wall and hard to handle, as it were.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
I think that also affected the family dynamics a bit because he wound up getting a lot of attention from me and Marjorie that took away from the other kids. Max was with us all the time. It was right around Y2K, 1999. Jake would have been going on 10, not quite 10. And then, you know, they found it, mammogram kind of thing.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
They found it in July. We were going down to the Jersey Shore where we went many years to visit with my family. We had just found out before we went down to the visit and it was the usual radiation and chemo. And then she had surgery like right on New Year's. She spent New Year's Eve Y2K in the hospital. That was huge because it really took her out of the picture in a lot of ways.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
She was a fighter. She lived another almost 10 years. She was undergoing treatment all the time. And there were periods when she was pretty much down and out and other periods when she was pretty good. But it made the family dynamic really difficult. Max was particularly difficult to manage. Our house was kind of crazy. And Marjorie had a brother who came to live with us for a while.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
He was also a little crazy. And so we just had pretty much a lot of things working against the family dynamic. Marjorie had cancer. Max had some special needs. We were a blended family. Her brother came and went and did crazy stuff.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
He was a sociopath, you know, the classic definition. And he came out of prison and he came to stay with us for quite a while. We were a very open family. We were very easygoing, you know, and he came and he helped out in a lot of ways. He was very capable. He could cook. He got a job as a chef. The chefing world is a world of drugs and alcohol. That was kind of a problem for him.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
The way he dealt with money was borderline criminal. You know, we were having a family Thanksgiving and he went, he bought this amazing food and gigantic ribeyes for everybody. And then dinner was over and he said to me, all right, yeah, I need a thousand dollars for the food. I'm like, what? We never talked about this.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
Long story short, he ran off with another brother's wife and he untrained our dog. He was a very charming fellow, but a little crazy.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
colon cancer, I guess. You know, they had told her it was irritable bowel syndrome, right? But then it was colon cancer. It was way advanced and she didn't last very long.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
Again, these splendid families are just remarkable. So Jacob's father had married another woman, and she had a daughter named Katie. And Katie was a couple years older than Jake. I just remember Jake coming home. I could smell alcohol in his breath. And he had been out with Katie, and Marjorie called the police. And we were telling the policeman, he's drunk.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
And so, you know, the policeman said, all right, Jake, breathe on me. And Jake would, like, inhale. And the cop says, I don't smell anything. We're like, he's inhaling alcohol. You know it. So I don't exactly remember what age he was. I mean, ninth grade or something. I had no idea the extent to which he was involved with stuff in high school.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
3: Wayward Son
Marjorie and I used to say, he's the one who's going to take care of us when we're old. He's the one who's going to get rich, you know, because he just was always outgoing. He just had a natural charisma and he was able to get things done. Unfortunately, he was getting drug deals done, but he was able to get things done.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
We want to stop by the hospital. We actually drove halfway to Worcester and then she called and said the doctor said you can't come. So we went home. So then on the fourth day out, she said you can come and we came. So, I mean, Ella was controlling everything. That's the story from there on out, you know.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
So we went and we came to his room and he was in the room and she was like a nurse, even though she wasn't a nurse, but she was taking care of everything, making the bed. She was like nonstop activity. And we're talking for like an hour. And then at some point she says, yeah, I was so stressed out. I went home last night and, you know, I shot up some heroin just to relax.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
And so I and I looked at each other and we're like, Why don't we, let's, you know, let us take you home. We didn't want her to drive alone. I said, you can't be doing this stuff. So she actually went in and got the needle and the whatever and brought it out. And I drove around Worcester looking for a dumpster and I threw it. I'm like, shit, now I'll get stopped by the cops.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
So I've got this heroin needle in my car, you know. And so, you know, we threw it away. And then we followed her to her parents' house. And we waited till her parents came home. I was honest, you know. And so she really should be here and not home alone doing all that.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
By this point, she had cut off everybody except me. Nobody could visit. Everybody on Jake's side of the family was cut off. And because she had health proxy, she could make all those decisions. I just refused to get into a fight with her. I knew there was, if I wanted to see Jake, I knew I had to stay on her good side. So I still had contact and I hadn't seen him for a while.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
Even though she was texting me, she wasn't really letting me visit. So I just want to be very clear. I mean, if she hadn't cared for him with the intensity and determination and focus for all that time, he would have died. I mean, I just absolutely believe that. Because it's almost like I want to believe that she was calling him out, you know? Jake, don't die. So she became obsessed with his care.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
I had regular phone calls with Varda and Ricky, like the three of us would get on the phone a couple of times a week.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
I would tell my wife, it's just me and the girls. We would just talk and just time talk through and what did you learn and what can you say and whatever and who should approach Elle about this or who should do that.
Blink | Jake Haendel's Story
5: Making Peace with Death
He attacked me and took a good chunk out of my leg. Luckily, she was right there and she pulled him off me. And I hobbled out of the house. I said, wow, if that had been anybody but, you know, basically your stepfather, you know, they'd just call the police and they'd take your dogs away or whatever. So she got mad at me and so then she cut me off.
Therapuss with Jake Shane
Session 56: Disco Lines
I think you're very charismatic. I think we did like... There was one month where we had 18 shows in August. And smack in the middle of that is the Kansas State Fair. We didn't really know what to expect. So we show up in Hutchinson, Kansas. There's nothing going on there. And we just walk around the fair. We see some very interesting characters.
Therapuss with Jake Shane
Session 56: Disco Lines
Now there's, there's some really bad things that happened.
Therapuss with Jake Shane
Session 56: Disco Lines
There was like, we're just trying to get some content out of being at the Kansas state fair. Cause there's not much else to do. So we were interviewing these random people. They were saying some heinous shit. We're like, okay, what were you asking them? We were just going up to them and being like, Oh, do you want to come to this show? And they're like, what the fuck is this?
Therapuss with Jake Shane
Session 56: Disco Lines
And it was also with, um, who is, who's the other artist? Um, The guy who did Firefest. He's a rapper. Fuck. Ja Rule. It was with Ja Rule. And so it's a Disco Lines and Ja Rule ticket. And it's the most random fucking ticket. In Kansas. And so people were not reacting well to this and just not being cool about it. Anyways, we went back to the green room, hung out. We did the show.
Therapuss with Jake Shane
Session 56: Disco Lines
And then we went back to the hotel and just like watched a football game. And it was like the chillest we've ever been on the road.